Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:29–31) Peter is known for being a leader among the disciples, for his job as a fisherman, for denying Jesus three times, and for his passionate and eager faith. Peter was ready to follow Jesus anywhere. In fact, when Jesus called Peter to follow him as his disciple, Peter immediately dropped what he was doing and followed him. And when the disciples saw Jesus walking on water, Peter asked Jesus to call him out onto the water too. Peter stepped out of the boat, trusting that if Jesus called him, he could do the impossible. For a minute, he walked on water. But then he took his eyes off Jesus, just for a second, and started to sink. When Jesus rescued him, he asked, “Why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:31). Here is the thing: However imperfectly, Peter got out of the boat. This story reminds us that faith isn’t about never failing; it’s about always coming back to Jesus. Peter’s willingness to step out in faith grew his relationship with the Lord; it allowed him to experience miracles and do great things for God’s people and church. We can do those things too, but only if we are brave enough to get out of the boat. It doesn’t have to be perfect. A life of faith has ups and downs, and we will all have moments of doubt. But a passion for Jesus means that when we fail, we always know who to reach for, knowing that he will reach back and help us. This week, let’s pray that our kids take a risk for their faith. Let’s pray that they boldly and passionately follow where Jesus asks them to, knowing that with him they can do the impossible. Jesus, give __________ a bold and passionate faith in you. Help them to hear your call for their life and give them the courage to follow you in that calling. When they face dear or doubt, remind them to call on you and trust in your goodness. Amen. Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Procrastination is something every family faces. It shows up in our own lives and in our kids, often leaving us feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and unsure where to start. In this episode, Jon Acuff returns to share practical insight from his latest book, Procrastination Proof. The conversation explores why we procrastinate, the common traps that keep us stuck, and how to take small, meaningful steps toward progress. We also talk about how these patterns show up in our kids and what it looks like to guide them with understanding and encouragement instead of frustration. This episode is a helpful reminder that getting unstuck doesn’t require perfection—just a willingness to take the next step. Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Procrastination and Its Universality 02:57 Jon Acuff's Journey to Writing 11 Books 05:56 Understanding Procrastination as a Solution 09:02 The Satisfaction of Completing Tasks 11:53 Four Permissions to Overcome Procrastination 15:05 Navigating New Seasons of Life 18:10 Encouragement for Moms Facing Identity Changes 19:14 Emotional Transitions of Parenting 20:04 Understanding Different Parenting Styles 25:45 Identifying Parenting Traps 30:30 Encouragement for Personal Growth Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Connect with Jon Acuff Procrastination Proof - Jon’s new book Four Traps Quiz Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Sign up for Morning Minute Open a LearningRX center Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9) Zacchaeus was a very rich and corrupt tax collector who was disliked by the Jewish people. One day, Jesus was passing through town and Zacchaeus decided he wanted to see him! But as you may know, Zacchaeus was a “wee little man,” so he had to climb a tree to get a good view. Much to everyone’s surprise and dismay, Jesus pointed him out, spoke to him, and invited himself over. At that moment, Zacchaeus’s heart changed. He felt guilty, but he also acted on his guilt and repented. He vowed to give half his possessions to the poor and to pay back four times the amount to anyone he had cheated. This wasn’t just a small apology—it was a complete turnaround; salvation came to his house and his faith was real because it moved him to action. We all have a barrier to genuinely meeting and following Jesus. For Zacchaeus, it was his corrupt values and his size. But Jesus broke through those barriers, and when he did, Zacchaeus repented. For our kids, those barriers might be life situations, friends, or even distractions. But no barrier is too big for Christ to reach us. Jesus sees each of us and knows us personally. He invited himself into Zacchaeus’s life, though Zacchaeus was a known sinner, and he invites himself into our kids’ hearts too. But responding to Jesus isn’t just about hearing his call; it’s about repentance. Zacchaeus didn’t just listen, he changed. As parents, we want our kids to truly follow Jesus, and that means turning away from sin and choosing a new way of life with him. This week, let’s pray that our kids recognize the sin in their lives and repent of that sin, feeling confident that Jesus forgives them. Jesus, thank you for forgiving our sins. Help __________ to see the sin in their life and to feel convicted. Take away all their guilt and shame in a way that only you can as they experience your perfect forgiveness. And may they live their life in a way that reflects your grace. Amen. Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Loving your family well isn’t always as simple as it sounds. There are seasons when connection feels easy, and others when you feel unseen, unheard, or like your efforts just aren’t landing. In this episode, Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages, shares insights from decades of helping couples and families better understand how to give and receive love. With the release of his latest book, the conversation goes deeper into how love languages can shape stronger, more meaningful relationships at home. We talk about what to do when you don’t feel loved, how to better understand your spouse and children, and why taking the first step in showing love can shift the entire dynamic of a relationship. There’s also practical wisdom on how to approach hard conversations with care and intentionality. This episode is a powerful reminder that small, consistent choices in how we love can make a lasting impact on our families. Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Dr. Gary Chapman 01:43 The Importance of Feeling Loved 03:43 Gary Chapman's Life and Work 04:58 Understanding Love Languages 08:42 The New Book: The Love Language That Matters Most 12:39 Communicating Love Effectively 16:46 Identifying Love Languages in Children 17:49 Understanding Love Languages in Early Childhood 20:55 Practical Parenting Tips Using Love Languages 24:38 Engaging with Teenagers: Navigating Independence 29:32 Adapting Love Languages for Teenagers 32:23 Legacy of Love: Reflections on Parenting and Faith Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Connect with Dr. Gary Chapman 5 Love Languages 5 Love Languages free test 5 Love Languages Premium Assessment The Love Language That Matters Most - new book 5 Love Languages of Children 5 Love Languages of Teenagers Open a LearningRX center Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus’ feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. (John 12:3) In the story of Mary and Martha, Mary was the sister who understood the big picture and spent a lot of time at the feet of Jesus. First, she sat at his feet as a disciple would do and listened to Jesus as he taught. Later, she anointed Jesus’s feet with expensive perfume and washed them with her hair. It would have been easy for Mary to be distracted and overwhelmed like her sister became. There was a lot going on and there were a lot of people in her house! Jesus was staying with them and the end of his ministry was nearing. He had also just resurrected their brother! Mary could have multitasked her way through that dinner, but she focused her whole self on Jesus instead. We live in a culture that tells us we can have it all and do it all, and we can multitask and be more efficient. But we can’t multitask Jesus. Jesus was not suggesting that Mary (or Martha) completely disregard their responsibilities, but he was calling them to focus fully on the most important thing, which was him in that moment. What would it look like for our families to focus on Jesus without distractions? As parents, we can model abiding in Christ and encourage our kids to do the same—to experience the gift of learning from him about eternal things instead of rushing around focusing on the present. This week, let’s pray that our kids say no to distractions and grow in their ability to solely focus on Jesus and truly abide in his presence. Jesus, thank you for being our teacher and our Savior. I pray that __________ chooses to sit at your feet and focus on you. As they do the work you have called them to, help them to remember that you are the most important thing. When they are distracted, as they inevitably will be, draw nearer to them. Amen. Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Legacy is something every family is building, whether intentionally or not. But in the middle of busy schedules and full lives, it can be easy to lose sight of what we’re actually passing down. In this month’s My Virtual Mentor episode, Jeff Henderson, author, pastor, and leader, shares wisdom on what it means to live and lead with legacy in mind. The conversation explores what truly matters at the end of our lives, the values we want to instill in our children, and how to be more intentional with the time we’ve been given. We talk about the tension between work and family, why choosing your family matters more than you think, and how everyday decisions shape the kind of legacy you leave behind. This episode is designed to not only encourage personal growth, but also spark meaningful conversations, with a mentor, spouse, or trusted friend, about the kind of life and family you want to build. If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the previous episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and TemperamentsMy Virtual Mentor: Stewardship & Generosity My Virtual Mentor: Time Management & Creating MarginMy Virtual Mentor: Identity in Christ (Part 1 and Part 2)My Virtual Mentor: Prioritizing Your Marriage  Chapters: 00:00 Reconnecting at Chick-fil-A Headquarters 05:01 Lessons on Leadership and Legacy from Truett Cathy 12:50 End-of-Life Perspectives: What Truly Matters 17:04 Navigating Parenting with Encouragement and Wisdom 18:20 The Weight of Words 22:14 Preparing for Impact 23:35 Defining Legacy and Values 28:01 Carrying on Family Traditions 34:20 Leadership and Influence in Parenting 37:43 A Prayer for Parents MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (MARRIAGE) Scripture to memorize: Deuteronomy 6:5-7 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Scriptures for prayer and study: Psalm 78:4, Matthew 6:20-21, Psalm 103:17, Proverbs 29:18 Books for further study: Eat Mor Chikin: Inspire More People by Truett CathyChoosing to Cheat by Andy StanleyThe Legacy Life by David GreenDivine Disruption by Tony Evans and children Discussion questions: What do you want to pass down from your parents? What do you want your kids to say about you when your life is over?  What values matter most to you?  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Connect with Jeff HendersonWhat To Do Next by Jeff HendersonFOR by Jeff HendersonResources from Titus 2 MentoringOpen a LearningRX center Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.” (Luke 23:42–43) As Jesus was led to his crucifixion, he was surrounded by two men on crosses next to him, all three of them facing death. One man was mocking and doubting Jesus, but the other man turned to Jesus in his final moments and was promised eternity with Jesus. Although not much was shared in this interaction, the thief did proclaim Jesus was Lord. It’s a powerful reminder that it’s never too late to repent and accept Jesus. There is always hope; in fact, the Bible says that everyone who calls on his name will be saved (Romans 10:13). This story also reminds us that doing good works or earning our way to heaven is not what Jesus offered us; it is a free gift. As believing parents, our hope is that there is more distance between our kids’ salvation and their death than there was for the thief on the cross. We know that true peace, joy, and hope is found in following Jesus, and we want our kids to have that for a lifetime; we want them to experience a full life of faith. We want them to spend many years drawing others to faith. However, we must never count out a child that is full of sin and far from God. God is still reaching for them up until their last breath. This week, let’s pray that our kids accept the free gift of salvation and spend their lives following Jesus. Jesus, thank you for the gift of salvation. Lord, please draw __________ to you. Help them to understand what following you means, that there is nothing they can do to make you love them less or more, and that you give them the gift of peace on earth now and eternal life with you later. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Marriage can be both deeply challenging and incredibly beautiful, and many couples experience seasons of disconnection along the way. In this episode, Cheryl Scruggs shares her powerful story of reconciliation after walking through divorce and finding her way back to her husband years later. Together, the conversation explores the realities of marriage, the slow drift that can happen over time, and the hope that restoration is possible, even after deep hurt. We talk about the importance of communication, the danger of letting resentment grow in silence, and the role of community in helping marriages stay healthy. There is also practical encouragement for women who want to be more intentional in their relationships and create space for honesty and healing. This episode is a reminder that while marriage takes work, it is also a place where God can bring growth, redemption, and renewed connection. Here are the verses she shared! Matthew 19:26 With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible. Deuteronomy 8:2 (read full chapter too) Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands. Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us. Chapters: 00:00 Navigating Life's Challenges 03:02 The Journey of Marriage Ministry 06:02 Crisis in Marriage: Recognizing the Signs 09:09 Building a Stronger Connection 11:59 The Importance of Vulnerability in Relationships 19:20 Navigating the Transition to Empty Nesting 22:02 The Importance of Nurturing Intimacy 24:34 Overcoming Disconnection in Marriage 27:32 The Role of Counseling in Strengthening Relationships 29:59 Practical Steps to Show Love and Respect 31:54 Finding Hope and Redemption in Marriage Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Connect with Cheryl and Jeff Thriving Beyond Belief - Cheryl’s podcast Thriving Beyond Belief - Cheryl’s newest book I Do Again - Jeff and Cheryl’s book Open a LearningRX center Sign up for Morning Minute Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41–42) Martha kind of gets a bad rap. In her story, Jesus and the disciples were staying at her home. Martha spent her time making food and busying herself to make her home hospitable, while her sister Mary sat at the feet of Jesus and listened to him. We all want to be Mary, choosing time with the Lord over the busyness of life (more on that in two weeks), but it’s important to remember that as disciples of Jesus we are called to sit and serve. In Martha’s case, it was all about priorities. Creating a hospitable home and serving others is important. In fact, Martha served Jesus and his disciples again at a dinner given in Jesus’s honor before Passover. But when it comes to serving others are we focused on Pinterest perfection or on making people feel comfortable and pointing to Jesus with our actions? It’s more about our attitude than our actions. Taking care of Jesus and his disciples was a good thing—but it seems as though Martha was seeking perfection. The truth is, seeking perfection is setting ourselves up for failure because it means we are depending more on ourselves than on Jesus. We can’t be perfect, only God is perfect. Today’s world looks like perfection and our kids are growing up right in the middle of it. But we can encourage them to keep their eyes on Jesus and serve him and others because it’s what’s in their hearts, not what makes them look best. This week, let’s pray that our kids can let go of any pressure for perfection and learn to rest in Jesus and his perfection. Let’s pray that when they are overwhelmed by the things of life they redirect their hearts toward the most important thing. Jesus, when __________ feels overwhelmed by the busyness of the world, help them to focus their heart back to you. Give them the peace to let go of perfection and expectation, and to rely on you instead. May they serve others out of a response to your love, not out of obligation, pride, or image. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Foster care is a journey that holds both deep brokenness and incredible beauty. For many families, it can also feel overwhelming to know how to step in and support children from hard places. In this episode, Meredith Brock, CEO of Proverbs 31 Ministries and a foster and adoptive mom, shares insights from her family’s experience with foster care and how the journey has shaped her faith and motherhood. The conversation explores the realities of caring for vulnerable children, the tension of holding both joy and heartbreak, and the ways God often meets families in their most difficult moments. Together they talk about what it looks like to support children with hard stories, how foster care can refine and stretch a family’s faith, and why the church has such an important role in caring for these kids. It’s also a reminder that supporting the foster care system isn’t limited to becoming a foster parent. Whether through respite care, advocacy, or supporting families already in the system, there are meaningful ways we can all step in and help. 00:00 Introduction and Personal Background 05:53 The Call to Foster Care 11:57 The Importance of Community Support 17:58 Respite Care and Community Involvement 24:07 Personal Growth Through Foster Care Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Meredith Connect with Proverbs 31 on Instagram Proverbs 31 Ministries Foster the Family  Open a LearningRX center Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26 ESV) Jairus was a synagogue leader and a man of status and faith. When his young daughter became deathly ill, he desperately fell at Jesus’s feet and pleaded for him to come and heal her. Jesus agreed, but on the way news reached them that Jairus’s daughter had died. The fellow leaders looked at Jairus and said, “Why bother the teacher anymore?” because she was already dead (Mark 5:35). But Jairus refused to believe death had the final word, and he put his hope in Jesus. When they arrived at the house, Jesus commanded the little girl to get up, and she did! “Why bother?” is a question filled with doubt, finality, and despair. Our world is hard and that makes people question the goodness of God. Why bother? How could God let bad things happen to good people? Where is God when things are this bad? Our kids will face those questions their entire lives. But Jesus does, indeed, have the final word. He told Jairus, “Don’t be afraid; just believe” (Mark 5:36), and he repeatedly tells us the same. We can show our kids how to put their whole faith in Jesus and how to trust him even when others say it’s too late, or too silly, or too difficult. God’s ability to perform miracles in our life has not changed, because he is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). We should find great hope in that! This week, let’s pray that our kids believe that God can do the impossible and have a faith that they hold onto even when the world says to them, “Why bother?” Jesus, I pray that __________ puts their hope in you. Give them a faith that believes in your possibilities. When things are hard, and the rest of the world says to give up or that faith is pointless, may they remember your promises and call on you for help. Help them to recall the miracles you have performed before and give them hope to see those miracles again. Amen. From blindness to healing with Kylie White If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Many families today are navigating life with neurodivergent children, from ADHD to dyslexia to autism, and it can feel overwhelming to know how to best support them. In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Kelly Cagle, host of Parenting IQ, who has a passion for helping moms create refreshing rhythms at home. She shares personal stories, research-backed insight, and practical ways parents can better support kids with ADHD. One of my favorite parts of this conversation was her encouragement for parents to truly understand their kids, to see the unique and beautiful way their brains process the world. It can be tempting to try to force neurodivergent kids into more typical patterns of behavior, but when we learn how their brains work, we can lead with empathy and help set them up to thrive. I learned so much from this conversation, and I think it will really encourage parents walking this road. 00:00 Introduction to the Podcast and Hosts 01:12 Personal and Professional Background of Dr. Kelly Cagle 03:05 Understanding ADHD: Definitions and Personal Experiences 05:30 Challenges in Traditional Education for ADHD Children 10:59 The Impact of Society and Genetics on ADHD 15:52 Navigating Parenting with ADHD: Systems and Support 19:06 Understanding Neurodiversity in Parenting 21:42 Homeschooling vs. Traditional Education 25:04 Navigating Diagnoses and Labels 30:43 Practical Strategies for Parents 32:00 The Journey of Writing a Book Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Kelly Parenting IQ Podcast 7 Personal Systems to Lower Stress ADHD is awesome by Penn Holderness Sign up for Morning Minute Open a LearningRX center The Hunt for the Kraken Lives of Faith and Grace series Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:20–31) One of the most talked about miracles of Jesus is his feeding five thousand people from five loaves of bread and two fish. Imagine being there, listening to Jesus powerfully preach with thousands of other people. It was lunchtime and everyone was hungry and cranky (hangry, if you will); the people needed to eat! But all there was to eat was a small basket of five loaves of bread and two fish from a little boy. That boy willingly offered up his small lunch to Jesus. He didn’t have enough, but what he had he gave to Jesus, trusting that he would use it for good. We don’t know what resources our kids will have when they grow up. No matter what they have, God calls them to be generous with it. God is in the business of multiplying. Whatever we have to offer God, he will multiply it. Whether that’s our financial resources, serving others, encouraging others, or spreading the gospel, he will take what we have capacity to give, and he will make it even more. This work requires trust and sacrifice from us; we have to give it away for God to use it. But it is not dependent on our efforts. It’s not our efforts or resources that will change lives and bring people to Jesus; it is God working through our efforts and resources. Let’s pray that our kids are generous with their resources and giftings so that God can work through them to expand his kingdom. Jesus, thank you for taking care of us. I pray that __________ will view their resources and gifts as a blessing from you and hold them loosely, knowing that if they offer them up to you, you will multiply them and bring more people to you. May they always remember that there are no small parts in God’s kingdom. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know we release a My Virtual Mentor episode once a month? Each one is designed to help you grow and then process what you’re learning with a mentor or trusted friend who’s a season ahead of you. This month’s conversation is one every family needs, but many couples struggle to live out. I’m joined by Ashley Willis, speaker, author, and co-host of The Naked Marriage Podcast, to talk about prioritizing your marriage while raising kids. We all say our marriage comes first, but actually living that way takes intentionality. Ashley shares honest encouragement and practical wisdom for couples who feel stretched thin—and especially for those who may be losing hope. Don’t miss her practical advice at the end. If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the previous episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and TemperamentsMy Virtual Mentor: Stewardship & Generosity My Virtual Mentor: Time Management & Creating MarginMy Virtual Mentor: Identity in Christ (Part 1 and Part 2) 00:00 Introduction  05:56 Practical Tips for Prioritizing Marriage 08:52 The Role of Counseling in Marriage 11:57 Building a Supportive Community 15:41 Navigating Hard Seasons in Marriage 20:52 The Role of Intimacy in Marriage 24:45 Encouragement for Struggling Moms 27:27 Witnessing God's Miracles in Marriage 31:21 Closing Thoughts and Prayer MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (MARRIAGE) Scripture to memorize: Colossians 3:13-14 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Scriptures for prayer and study: Romans 12:3, I Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:1-5, Proverbs 5:15-19 Books for further study: Do Marriage Better with – Ashley WillisUs In Mind – Ted LoweMarriage – Paul David TrippYou and Me Forever – Francis and Lisa Chan Discussion questions: What is the most rewarding part of being married? What is the most challenging part of being married? What are your prayers for your marriage? What is God nudging you to focus on - how you can improve your role in marriage? Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube! ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with AshleyXO MarriageNaked Marriage Podcast Married Into the Family - book by Ashley WillisDo Marriage Better - Ashley and Dave’s latest bookResources from Titus 2 MentoringSign up for Morning MinuteChristian ParentingOpen a LearningRX centerThe Hunt for the Kraken Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. (1 John 3:1) In Mark 3:17 we learn that Jesus gave his disciple John and his brother James the nickname “sons of thunder.” There was probably a good reason for that nickname, likely their enthusiastic and passionate faith. But interestingly, John later refers to himself as “the disciple whom Jesus loved” (John 13:23). So why the change? It seems a little odd and not quite the humility that Christ calls us to. John had a close relationship with Jesus. Through all his experiences with Jesus, all the miracles he witnessed and lessons he was taught, John truly knew he was loved by Jesus. John spent so much time with Jesus that he was changed from a thunderous man of faith to one who was immersed in perfect love. God’s love leaves a permanent mark. Even when life is hard, we can be confident that God’s love is real, constant, and personal. His love isn’t just something we read about in the Bible or hear about at church; it’s something that we can experience every single day. We want our kids to walk so closely with God that they are changed from the inside out—soft yet emboldened, gentle yet confident. And we want our kids to stand firm in their faith, knowing that God truly, perfectly loves them. Let’s pray that our kids know how much God loves them and are transformed because of that love. Jesus, thank you for loving us perfectly. Help __________ know that you love them and are there for them. Give them a heart to follow you and remind them that they can rely on your love. As they grow in faith, may they spend so much time with you that they change and become like you. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It’s easy to lose yourself in motherhood. In this episode, Ashlee Gadd shares how moms can rediscover their creativity and passions—even in the chaos of raising kids. We talk about embracing the truth that we’re all creative, making space for joy in every season, and why hospitality doesn’t have to be perfect to matter. Ashlee’s new book, You’re in Good Company, explores friendship, motherhood, and showing up for one another. I hope this conversation encourages you to carve out a little margin for what brings you life. Chapters: 00:00 Introduction 04:00 The Nature of Creativity in Motherhood 08:12 The Importance of Modeling Creativity 11:34 Finding Connection with Growing Children 18:11 The Impact of Intentional Gifts 21:01 Navigating Creative Identity as a Mother 27:21 Embracing New Seasons of Motherhood 29:19 The Importance of Self-Care in Creativity Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Ashlee Coffee and Crumbs You’re In Good Company (pre-order her new book) Create Anyway (recent book on motherhood and creativity) Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Open a LearningRX center Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. (Matthew 7:7) Nicodemus was a Pharisee and a member of the Jewish ruling council. He knew the Scriptures better than anyone. And still, people were talking about Jesus’s teachings and miracles and Nicodemus wanted to know more, so he went to Jesus in the night and asked him questions. Nicodemus asking questions led to Jesus explaining one of the most important parts of the Christian faith—why Jesus came and what it takes to truly follow him and enter his kingdom. Jesus explained that to be saved, a person has to be born again. Nicodemus had all the answers on paper, but he must have known something was missing in his heart, and he sought out Jesus to find out what. We should be curious about our faith too. Questions about faith do not have to be scary—they can be viewed as an opportunity to learn more about the heart of God. We want our kids to make their faith their own because a personal, deeply rooted faith is more likely to transform them. An inherited faith is more likely to fall apart when things fall apart. Asking questions is part of the process of maturing spiritually and making faith their own, so we should encourage it! This week, let’s pray that our kids seek after Jesus and ask the right questions to make their faith their own. Jesus, thank you for answering our prayers and our questions. When __________ has questions, may they always come to you, knowing you will answer them and that you care for them. Help them to grow strong and confident in their own faith. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode is for all moms raising kids of all seasons. My guest, Kim Anderson, is a Nashville therapist who began her career as an elementary teacher before transitioning to counseling. She is driven by a desire to support whole families through life's challenges. She is the founder of Elevate Moms, a faith community where mothers can heal, grow, and connect.  This super practical episode is beyond encouraging. Kim helps us think through many difficult challenges of parenting in today’s world. She focuses on the importance of emotional regulation, attunement, and setting boundaries. Our discussion covers how to navigate difficult conversations with children, the significance of understanding mental health, and the balance between advocating for children and allowing them to develop resilience. My favorite part is when Kim encourages us to take care of our own emotional well-being to better support our children. She reminds us that being “perfect” at parenting isn’t possible. And it’s more than okay to be imperfect. I pray you will breathe a little lighter today after hearing Kim’s encouragement.  Enjoy! Courtney Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Kim Anderson Elevate Moms Family Room Membership Technology Guide (with contract) 30% is “good enough” parenting Understanding attachment styles with David Thomas and Sissy Goff Sign up for Morning Minute I Can Only Imagine 2 Disciplines of Devotion Series LearningRX Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

And when Elizabeth heard the greeting of Mary, the baby leaped in her womb. And Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit, and she exclaimed with a loud cry, “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb! And why is this granted to me that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For behold, when the sound of your greeting came to my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.” (Luke 1:41–45 ESV) There’s a beautiful scene between two relatives in Luke 1, as we read about the coming of Jesus. Elizabeth was pregnant with John the Baptist, and her cousin Mary had just been told by an angel that she would give birth to a son and he would be named Jesus, the Son of the Most High. Imagine having this kind of news and needing to process this with a friend. And it’s especially tricky when you are a virgin and learn you are expecting a child. In Luke 1, Mary visited her relative Elizabeth to tell her the unexpected and life-changing news. At the moment she entered, the baby leaped in Elizabeth’s womb and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. The interesting part about this moment is Elizabeth’s joy in her response to Mary’s news. She could’ve been a little confused that her cousin had just “one-upped” her by sharing that she was pregnant with the Savior of the world. Instead, she recognized that the Lord was fulfilling his promises through Mary. It was a moment of pure support, praise, and celebration. She immediately proclaimed, “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb” (Luke 1:42 KJV). Throughout the Bible, and even in today’s culture, we see moments of jealousy and comparison. Even in Christian communities, we see jealousy and discontentment when God is blessing others. Let’s pray that our children respond to their friends just like Elizabeth did to Mary. Let’s pray that they trust the Lord with their paths and step in as the first one to celebrate with joy for their friends and family. Jesus, when __________ has a friend or a family member who has great news, let them be the first to celebrate. Let them cast aside the feelings of jealousy and stand firmly in their own journey with God. Let them be known as friends who praise what God is doing in the lives around them. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

She’s baaacccckkkk!!! The creator and original host of Pardon The Mess podcast, Cynthia Yanof, is back with us today. She is one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. Aside from great humor, she brings real life encouragement with biblical truth. In today’s episode, Cynthia and I chat about what matters most in life. As we look ahead to 2026 - where can we spend our time in a way that matters? I remember many moments in life I was all worked up and stressed over things in parenting that really didn't matter. I pray you feel seen and so much needed permission to let things go after this conversation. Cynthia shares beautiful stories about parenting, faith and friendship in a way that leaves me feeling encouraged. She has such a heart for prayer and is the reason we pray every Monday as a community. I’m super thankful for the legacy she left over here at Pardon the Mess! Enjoy Courtney  Chapters: (00:00) Welcome Back and Podcast Journey (02:30) Navigating Parenting and New Projects (05:01) Life with Kids: Balancing Ages and Stages (08:05) What Really Matters in Parenting (12:19) The Importance of Rest and Margin (13:04) Urgency vs. Importance in Parenting (16:11) Lessons Beyond the Game (16:27) Navigating Parenting Pressures (18:48) The Importance of Friendship (24:55) Faith and Love in Action Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Cynthia Messmerized Podcast Sidetracked Podcast Feeding the Mouth That Bites You Podcast How’d I Miss That? (new book) by Cynthia Yanof Life Is Messy, God is Good by Cythia Yanof Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Raising Daughters I Can Only Imagine 2 Open a LearningRX center Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Paul said, “John’s baptism was a baptism of repentance. He told the people to believe in the one coming after him, that is, in Jesus.” (Acts 19:4) Do you love the Olympics and watching teams compete? It can be so inspiring to watch a team of swimmers work together in a relay or a track and field star pass his baton to the next runner. Each team member is important. It’s a powerful reminder to do our part with excellence. In the life of John the Baptist, we see a devoted follower of Jesus do his part with great faithfulness. He didn’t even know what his effort and work would mean in the end, but he obeyed and trusted. John spread the good news of the coming Messiah so that people were ready for him; his entire ministry was planting seeds in the hearts of the people. Some even asked if he was the Messiah, but he always pointed people back to Christ (John 1:19–28). It’s fun to imagine that somehow our own stories of faith are a part of one giant race with batons passing through generations. When we teach our kids about Jesus, we are planting seeds in their hearts. We don’t know what those seeds will grow into, but we can trust that they will take the baton we pass to them and continue to pass it to others. Let’s pray that our kids trust their calling over their lives and realize their greater impact in God’s big story. Jesus, thank you that we get to be part of your greater story. Lead __________ to hear your call on their life. Help them to worry less about earthly things and more about trusting you. Give them opportunities to plant seeds in the hearts of people around them and be obedient in joyfully sharing your good news! Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that once a month we are doing a mentor episode? We will cover a different topic each month in hopes to provide helpful content for you and your local mentor. 1) listen to the episode 2) talk about it with a mentor or friend that is a season ahead of you If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the previous episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and TemperamentsMy Virtual Mentor: Stewardship & Generosity My Virtual Mentor: Time Management & Creating Margin Today’s episode comes to you in two parts. The first episode is with author, speaker and amazing mom Sara Hagerty. She has such a genuine heart to keep her life rooted in Jesus. We talk all about how identity is a challenging topic for us as moms. We care so much about how we do as moms - and we can get really rattled if it doesn’t go well. Our identity can quickly become rattled if we have it tethered to the wrong source. I also wanted to release a second episode today that I believe will practically help you think through “identity.” The week that I recorded Sara on this topic, my own heart was wrestling with what God says about our identity. I stumbled across this message by pastor Preston Morrison and it rocked my world. I got his permission to re-air it for you. Do not miss the truth and clarity that Preston provides around our “identity in Christ.”  My favorite part is the humility that Sara brings to the table. She is so honest with how hard motherhood can be and she invites us to bring God into every single disappointment and hard circumstance. She urges us to lean into the very things that drive us crazy.  Enjoy! Courtney (02:59) Navigating Motherhood and Identity (05:57) The Struggles of Motherhood (08:59) Finding God in the Chaos (12:05) The Unseen Work of Motherhood (15:00) Embracing the Struggles (17:56) The Impact of God’s Attributes (18:20) Understanding God Through Adoration (21:43) The Journey of Self-Discovery and Identity (24:52) The Importance of Limitations in Parenting (28:29) Navigating Identity Beyond Achievements (32:52) Finding Beauty in Boundaries (36:39) Embracing Loss and Suffering in Motherhood MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (IDENTITY) Scripture to memorize: Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Scriptures for prayer and study: Verses on Identity Books for further study: In His Image – Jen WilkinMade for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image – Hannah Anderson Discussion questions: Have you struggled with your identity? In what seasons have you questioned your identity? Who does God say that we are? Is there a time you attached what you “do” to your identity?  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Sara Unseen by Sara Hagerty Adore by Sara Hagerty The Gift of Limitations by Sara Hagerty Preston Morrison podcast, The Leader’s Cut Part 1 episode with Sara Hagerty Resources from Titus 2 Mentoring Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Raising Daughters Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that once a month we are doing a mentor episode? We will cover a different topic each month in hopes to provide helpful content for you and your local mentor. 1) listen to the episode 2) talk about it with a mentor or friend that is a season ahead of you If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the previous episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and TemperamentsMy Virtual Mentor: Stewardship & Generosity My Virtual Mentor: Time Management & Creating Margin Today’s episode comes to you in two parts. The first episode is with author, speaker and amazing mom Sara Hagerty. She has such a genuine heart to keep her life rooted in Jesus. We talk all about how identity is a challenging topic for us as moms. We care so much about how we do as moms - and we can get really rattled if it doesn’t go well. Our identity can quickly become rattled if we have it tethered to the wrong source. I also wanted to release a second episode today that I believe will practically help you think through “identity.” The week that I recorded Sara on this topic, my own heart was wrestling with what God says about our identity. I stumbled across this message by pastor Preston Morrison and it rocked my world. I got his permission to re-air it for you. Do not miss the truth and clarity that Preston provides around our “identity in Christ.”  My favorite part is the humility that Sara brings to the table. She is so honest with how hard motherhood can be and she invites us to bring God into every single disappointment and hard circumstance. She urges us to lean into the very things that drive us crazy.  Enjoy! Courtney (02:59) Navigating Motherhood and Identity (05:57) The Struggles of Motherhood (08:59) Finding God in the Chaos (12:05) The Unseen Work of Motherhood (15:00) Embracing the Struggles (17:56) The Impact of God’s Attributes (18:20) Understanding God Through Adoration (21:43) The Journey of Self-Discovery and Identity (24:52) The Importance of Limitations in Parenting (28:29) Navigating Identity Beyond Achievements (32:52) Finding Beauty in Boundaries (36:39) Embracing Loss and Suffering in Motherhood MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (IDENTITY) Scripture to memorize: Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Scriptures for prayer and study: Verses on Identity Books for further study: In His Image – Jen WilkinMade for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image – Hannah Anderson Discussion questions: Have you struggled with your identity? In what seasons have you questioned your identity? Who does God say that we are? Is there a time you attached what you “do” to your identity?  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Sara Unseen by Sara Hagerty Adore by Sara Hagerty The Gift of Limitations by Sara Hagerty Preston Morrison podcast, The Leader’s Cut Part 2 episode with Preston Morrison  Resources from Titus 2 Mentoring Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Raising Daughters Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance and relief for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die. Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this? (Esther 4:14 NLT) Esther is one of only two books of the Bible named after a woman, which is pretty incredible! Esther was an orphaned Jew living in a foreign land. She was unlikely to make an impact on history, but God had other plans! She was so beautiful that she was brought to the king and became his queen. When a plot to destroy the Jewish people was uncovered, Esther had a choice: Should she keep quiet, or tell her husband and risk her life? It was then that her cousin, who raised her, asked the famous question: Perhaps you were born for such a time as this? It’s not always easy to step into our purpose. Like Esther, we may find ourselves in situations where doing the right thing feels risky. But when that purpose comes from God, it’s nearly impossible to say no to because it feels so right and everything falls into place. What was your child born to do? We don’t fully know, and the answer will unfold and change with time. But we do know that God chose you to be the parent of your child and to live in this time for a reason. There will be a moment (or many moments) in your child’s life where they realize they were made for something. Maybe it’s landing the right job, maybe it’s starting a family, or maybe it’s being in the right place at the right time. It could be a call to ministry or stepping out in faith to use their time, talents, and treasures to glorify God and serve others. We can be encouraging parents that point them back to Scripture and the promise that God created them for a good purpose and has good plans for their future. This week, let’s pray that our kids grow in their faith, knowing that God made them for a reason, that they will discover their purpose and step into it with confidence, knowing God is with them every step of the way. Jesus, thank you for making all of us for a purpose. Help __________ rely on you and seek your word to help them find your purpose and plan for their life. Give them the faith to step forward in obedience, knowing that if you call them to something, you will equip them. And may they always remember that they were created for such a time as this. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Imagine you can hear me screaming with excitement. You get to meet MY SISTER, Kerri Taylor, on the podcast this week. I am so proud of her for doing this. It isn’t easy to walk back through the hardest season of your life. However, she has a passion to turn her pain into purpose.  Kerri is a wife, a mom, a leader of moms and one incredible athlete. She is the best big sister I could ask for and the reason I rededicated my life to Christ. In this episode, she shares about her intense journey with postpartum. If you have experienced anxiety or depression as a mom, I believe this episode will really encourage you. I love that Kerri gets practical and shares things that helped her get through her season of depression and anxiety. She encourages us to see a doctor, get counseling, avoid hiding in your home and lean into God. She trusted God through the dark times and is now sharing about his faithfulness on the other side. I am praying that this will reach any mom suffering with anxiety and depression to be reminded that you are never alone. Enjoy! Courtney Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Sign up for Morning Minute Resources from today’s show: Connect with Kerri Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” (Isaiah 6:8) Isaiah had a vivid dream of God seated on his throne surrounded by angels. One of the angels took burning coal, touched Isaiah’s lips, and cleansed him from sin as God asked the question “Who will go for us?” And Isaiah answered with a resounding “Send me!” He went on to become an adviser for many kings and called on people to repent and be obedient. But the most important message he shared was the message that a Savior, the Messiah, the Prince of Peace was coming! His prophecy was fulfilled with Jesus. Isaiah was ready for the privilege of serving God even before he knew what he was meant to do. He offered himself to the Lord immediately. Most of us are slower to commit. Questions and fears flood our minds: If I say yes, will he send me to be a missionary far away? Where am I going? What do I have to say and do? Will I have to give up things that I love? What is the cost for me? Isaiah knew that if God was calling him, it must be important and worth saying yes to. Growing closer to the Lord also means knowing his calling won’t lead us astray. When God invites us to do something, we don’t have to be afraid—we can be excited! We want our kids to know that truth as well. They don’t need to know every detail, they just need willing hearts that are excited and ready to follow! This week, let’s pray that our kids say yes to God with enthusiasm, not hesitation or fear! Lord, help __________ say “yes” to you with joy and excitement. Give them a heart that is eager to follow your plans, knowing that you have great things in store. When you call them, help them to trust you completely, knowing that you will lead them every step of the way. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you are a parent, you know what it feels like to be overwhelmed and exhausted. Maybe you are heading into 2026 already feeling so discouraged with the way your home and life is running. It feels like the to do's and requests literally never end and your sanity is fading. Maybe you’re already struggling with balancing your job and motherhood. My guest today is author, podcaster, mom KyAnn Molina. She is a mom of young kids that is passionate about helping other moms find home systems, time management and rhythms in a season of burnout. If you are feeling overwhelmed 100% of the time - there is hope. There are some simple ways to improve your daily sanity.  I absolutely loved KyAnn’s passion to help moms find sanity again. It can be so infuriating to feel like your life is out of control. I hope you realize you aren’t alone. Being a mom is hard work. The amount of chores and to dos is legit. The mental and emotional overload is real. You are not doing it wrong - it’s a part of the reality of balancing life and motherhood. I pray this episode meets you with practical help during a season of overwhelm. It can get better!  Enjoy! Courtney Chapters: (00:00) Introduction to KyAnn's Journey (01:10) Experiencing Burnout in Parenting (03:03) Navigating Entrepreneurial Challenges (07:06) Finding Rhythms in Daily Life (11:25) Understanding Postpartum Depression (13:11) Creating Peaceful Home Environments (15:37) Meal Planning and Family Connection (18:13) Finding Balance in Parenting and Work (20:12) Preventing Burnout: Proactive Strategies (22:03) Establishing Family Rhythms and Traditions (23:41) The Impact of Comparison in Motherhood (27:57) Trusting God in Seasons of Change Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Kyann Simple Rhythms for Busy Moms - KyAnn’s podcast Rhythms That Scale - KyAnn’s guide  Simple Rhythms Community - join KyAnn’s community  Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Gracebased Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace. (Ephesians 1:7) Hosea was a minor prophet with a major message about God’s unwavering love and faithfulness. The Israelites had turned against God over and over again, and he called Hosea to not just preach about turning back to God but to actively live out forgiveness. Hosea married a woman named Gomer who was continually unfaithful to him. But Hosea pursued her, forgave her, and brought her back to him every time—just like God did and does for his people. God’s love is not based on our actions. It’s good and right to live a faithful life and continually deepen our relationship with God. But even when we turn away, God wants to restore us to him. His love is not based on our faithfulness or our efforts; it is based on his character. Our human character says to “forgive and forget,” but oftentimes we don’t let things go. In contrast, God’s perfect character means he never holds our sin against us. He forgives sinners completely, willingly, and perfectly because of what Jesus did on the cross for us. Our kids will make mistakes and hurt us, but we can extend the gift of forgiveness to them and model the kind of love that pursues, forgives, and brings back. That way, when someone hurts them they know how to extend forgiveness as well. This week, let’s pray that our kids know they are forgiven for all their sins because of God’s gift of grace. Let’s pray that they will be quick to forgive others because they have been forgiven by Christ. Jesus, thank you for your perfect love and perfect forgiveness. Help __________ to be a person of grace, knowing that they can forgive others because you have forgiven them. May they learn to truly grasp the miracle of grace and the depth of your love for them. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome back! Have you ever wondered if you fit in the story of God? Maybe you’re reading your Bible and just wonder how it all works together. As Christian parents, it’s important to wrestle with these types of questions. These questions will certainly come up as your kids take their faith journey.  My guest today is Dr. Jonathan Murphy and he helps us tackle questions of faith. He is the senior pastor of Stonebriar Community Church, a seminary professor and author. Most importantly, he is a wife to my friend Sarah-Jane and they have four beautiful children. My favorite part is when Jonathan reminds us that we all have the same purpose - to love God and to love others. There is great joy found in that purpose. This was a powerful reminder to me to stay obedient where He has me planted - in this season of parenting, in this current city and current time in history. Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Authentic Influencer by Dr. Jonathan Murphy The Story of God and Us by Dr. Jonathan Murphy Tik Tok inspiration - man caring for veteran Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When they had crossed, Elijah said to Elisha, “Tell me, what can I do for you before I am taken from you?” “Let me inherit a double portion of your spirit,” Elisha replied. (2 Kings 2:9) Elisha was Elijah’s protégé. Most scholars agree that he probably spent six years with Elijah, learning from him and serving him. He had big shoes to fill, and he knew it! When Elijah was readying to leave and be with the Lord, Elisha asked for a double portion of Elijah’s power. This was a big ask, not because it was too big for God but because it meant a lot of responsibility. Elisha was ready because he hungered for God. Elisha was not looking to be better than Elijah. He did not want to outdo his miracles and accomplishments. Elisha saw what God did through Elijah, and he wanted that too! Elisha wanted to carry on the work that his mentor started, and he understood that he needed more of God in order to do that. Our kids are the future, and they will do amazing things for God’s kingdom. As their parents, we get to encourage them to seek after God and boldly ask for his presence and miracles in their lives. We get a front row seat to witness their journey of obedience. They don’t need more power, more popularity, more money, or more influence to make an impact on the world. What they truly need is a deep connection with God. The wonderful news is that as we draw closer to him, we inevitably develop a greater desire for him, recognizing that he is the source of our strength, joy, and peace. This week, let’s pray that our kids hunger for God and that as they grow in faith they say, “more of you, God, less of me.”  Lord, give _________ a hunger for you. May they always look to you as the source of their abilities, knowing that their weaknesses are made strong in your presence. Help them to always recognize their need for you in their life and give them the confidence that they can do amazing things through you. More of you, less of them. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I get so many books and pitches that come across my desk. There are so many talented4w authors, pastors and leaders out there and I wish I could have every one of them on. I always pray for discernment on which guests to put in front of you. When the new book, Rebranding the Church by Dr. Eric Mason, came across my desk, I was definitely intrigued. Dr. Mason planted a church in a tough neighborhood in Philly over 19 years ago. He’s a passionate pastor, husband and father that is leaning into important conversations for unity in the church.  This conversation challenged my thinking and I pray it does that for you too. In today’s episode, Dr Mason and I talk about the state of the church and the constant division we are seeing. Are we being a light to our cities? Are we unified with other believers or treating them like enemies? What is the image the world sees with church leadership? I hope this stirs your thinking (like it did for me) and challenges you to lead my family well in the area of church unity. My favorite part is towards the end when he talks about his approach to Christian parenting. He has his kids listen to podcasts and it invites them to ask questions around faith. He encourages us to invite dialogue into our home. I love that he is an intentional and present dad in the midst of pastoring thousands of people. Enjoy! Courtney Chapters: (00:00) Introduction and Family Dynamics (05:03) Navigating the Church's Image and Unity (10:00) Leadership Challenges in Modern Church (22:42) Parenting in a Complex Spiritual Landscape (27:39) The Importance of Presence in Parenting (29:15) Breaking the Soil of the Heart (30:12) Unity in the Midst of Division Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Dr. Eric Mason Epiphany Fellowship Thriving Ministry Rebranding The Church book Dwell Bible in a Year  Sign up for Morning Minute Christian Parenting Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! (Psalm 46:10 ESV) Elijah did truly incredible things in the name of God. We could list miracle upon miracle and talk about Elijah’s great faith, his refusal to bow to others, and God’s power. But in 1 Kings 19, Elijah slows down, and the story is so powerful. Elijah was exhausted from all his work defeating the prophets of Baal and he was afraid for his life. So he ran into the wilderness, where he told God he wanted to die. While he slept under a tree, God, in his goodness, sent an angel that provided food and water. With more energy, Elijah continued his journey, waiting to hear from God. A powerful wind, an earthquake, and a fire came, but God was not in those as you would expect. God was in a still small voice. Elijah was able to hear from God when he was rested, taken care of, and still. He slowed down in the middle of great and important things. He took a nap, ate, drank, and listened. Our world values productivity and speed. Those are good things, but it’s important to rest too. In fact, God calls us to Sabbath! Sometimes, our kids just need to rest (we do too!). God knows our limits. He will provide what we need—physically and spiritually. And he often speaks in the quiet moments, when our hearts are still enough to listen. So let’s take time to encourage that in our kids. This week, let’s pray that our kids learn to slow down and listen for the voice of God. Lord, when __________ feels tired or discouraged, remind them that it’s okay to rest. Help them to take care of themselves, trusting that you will meet their needs. Help them learn to still their bodies and souls and listen for your voice. Thank you for speaking to us and hearing us. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that once a month we are doing a mentor episode? We will cover a different topic each month in hopes to provide helpful content for you and your local mentor. 1) listen to the episode 2) talk about it with a mentor or friend that is a season ahead of you If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the first few episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and TemperamentsMy Virtual Mentor: Stewardship & Generosity  I am so delighted to give you life coach Elaine Franklin on the podcast today. She is 77 years young and has been mentoring women and couples for decades. Her passion for stewardship and time management is so evident. She is practical and wise and gives me hope that we can spend our days wisely in 2026.  My favorite part is when she talks about how to create margin in our lives. I do believe time management is one of the most critical things we can address in our families. How we spend our time matters. It can impact the sanity of our homes. It can help us focus on what matters most. Enjoy! Courtney Chapters: (00:00) Introduction and Background (03:36) The Importance of Time Management (08:50) Understanding Responsibilities and Priorities (10:53) Finding Purpose and Clarity (12:47) Practical Tools for Time Management (19:16) The Need for Margin in Life (22:46) Reflections on Life and Stewardship of Time MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (TIME MANAGEMENT) Scripture to memorize: Psalm 90:12 Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Scriptures for prayer and study: Ephesians 5:15-16 Matthew 6:33 Proverbs 29:18 Books for further study: The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark ComerFreedom from the Tyranny of the Urgent by Charles Hummel It’s Time - a practical guide to order your days by Shawna Sullivan  Discussion questions: What is your purpose? What is your mission?  What are your top priorities?  What are the most important things for you in this season? Who is in your circle of care vs circle of responsibility?  What is God asking you to stop doing?  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Elaine at [email protected] Connect with Shawna 3 ways to stop wasting your time and money - episode with Shawna Sullivan 7 Do’s and Don’ts for your time and money by Shawna Sullivan  It’s Time - a practical guide to order your days by Shawna Sullivan  My Utmost for His Highest - devotional  Dwell Bible in a Year  Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong. (1 Kings 3:9) Solomon is the biblical king who is most known for his wisdom. One night, God came to Solomon in a dream and asked him what he wanted from God. Solomon asked for wisdom. He could have asked for anything: health, wealth, or defeating his enemies, but he asked for wisdom, and this made God really happy. God is ready and willing to share his wisdom with us; all we have to do is ask for it. But in a world where incredible knowledge is literally at our fingertips, it’s easy to overlook biblical wisdom. Earthly wisdom is knowing a lot of math, being well read, and having strong financial literacy; it’s knowing all the answers on Jeopardy. Biblical wisdom is living within the will of God through the Holy Spirit. It’s relying on God to know how to treat people, what activities to participate in, what is right versus wrong, and so on. God delights in us asking him for wisdom! The Bible says he was pleased with Solomon when he did this (1 Kings 3:10), and he is pleased with us when we do it as well. When it comes to our kids, we desire for them to seek God’s wisdom to make decisions. We model this to them first and encourage them to make wise choices when it comes to friends, where to go to school, acting with integrity, and whether to go to that party. God cares about all of those things, and he will share his wisdom about them with our kids when they ask for it. This week, let’s pray that our kids ask for God’s wisdom and know that true wisdom isn’t just knowing what to do—it’s acting upon that wisdom as well. Lord, give __________ a heart like Solomon’s, one that values your wisdom above all else. Keep their heart open, ready to listen to your Holy Spirit. We want them to grow wise in every aspect, but to help them make choices that honor you, always acting upon the wisdom you give them. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Merry Christmas to you all! I hope this is such a special week for your family to celebrate the birth of Jesus. What a thrill to interview my youngest daughter and give you a chance to get to know her better. I’m a little biased, but this girl is one special human. I love learning from her! She gives her advice on friendships, ways to parent teens, importance of mentoring and much more. She also shares some practical tips from lash serum to our Nuuly obsession.  My favorite part is when she reminds us to offer grace to our kids. I needed this reminder that they need a break from the pressure and expectations. They need to know we will offer grace when they mess up.  Merry Christmas!! Courtney  Chapters: (00:00) Introduction and Background (02:59) Beauty Tips and Favorites (06:00) Fashion and Shopping Preferences (08:55) Family Values and Relationships (11:52) Advice for Middle Schoolers (12:23) The Challenges of Junior Year (13:03) Understanding Dyslexia and Learning Differences (14:42) Sibling Relationships and Transitions (16:57) College Aspirations and Pressures (17:52) Faith Development Through Camp Experiences (20:29) Maintaining Faith in Everyday Life (23:19) The Importance of Mentorship and Role Models (26:20) The Importance of Mentorship in Parenting (27:50) Navigating High School: Advice for Parents (32:06) Spiritual Growth and Personal Reflection (34:00) Words of Wisdom for Moms and Teens Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Babe Lash Serum Black Rock - Sugar Free Sunrise Nuuly link for $30 off Dwell Bible in a Year  Support Christian Parenting Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told. (Luke 2:20) In the Christmas story, the angel of the Lord announced Jesus’s birth to some lowly shepherds who were minding their own business, watching over their sheep. It seems like an unlikely group, but their response is a perfect example of a life of faith. The shepherds were rightfully afraid of the angel, but they immediately said, “Let’s go . . . see” (Luke 2:15). The Bible says they hurried off and found Mary, Joseph, and the baby. Then they spread the word because they could not contain this big news! And when they had told as many people as they could, they came back to Mary and Joseph and praised God for everything they had seen and heard. Let’s remember that response this Christmas: Let’s go learn more, let’s tell everyone about it, and let’s praise God for all he has done! It sounds easy enough, but we all know there are barriers to spreading the good news of Jesus: peer pressure, distraction, embarrassment, and self-doubt, just to name a few. But if we just move past those things, we can share the hope of Jesus with our hurting world, just as we were meant to do! Let’s pray that our kids will always be proud and ready to share about Jesus, knowing that the news of our Savior is too good to keep to themselves! Father God, thank you for sending your son as a baby to rescue our broken world. Help __________ to internalize the good news of Jesus and be so excited that they have to tell others! Keep our family’s hearts and minds on you this Christmas season. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What a thrill to interview my oldest daughter and one of her very best friends. Ella and Landry have been friends since 3rd grade and it’s so special to hear from two young women that are keeping their faith a priority in college. I ask them about their “favorites” from tennis shoes to rom-coms and then we get into some more serious topics. My favorite moment is when I ask each of them, “What is God teaching you right now?” I was blown away by their answers and also felt so thankful that they are both engaged in their college church communities. Ask your kiddos that question this Christmas break and let them share about their faith. I am always astounded when I learn how much depth and wisdom is in these teens. They are wiser than you know. You also don’t want to miss my opening story about an “elf on the shelf” adventure gone wrong. I am still feeling a little rattled from it. 00:00 Introduction and Guest Introductions 07:05 High School Experiences and Advice 10:02 Navigating Junior Year Challenges 14:54 Senior Year Reflections and Relationships 18:26 Maintaining Faith in High School 23:35 Parental Guidance and Support 25:37 Navigating High School Dynamics 26:56 Understanding Teen Communication 28:04 The High School Experience: Challenges and Growth 30:51 Transitioning to College Life 33:35 Building Friendships in College 37:48 Spiritual Growth and Lessons Learned 43:18 Legacy of Love: Lessons from Grandmothers Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Ella’s new sneakers - Back 70 Yahtzee Game Nertz Game Quiplash (on Apple TV) New Morning Mercies devotional Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

But now your kingdom will not endure; the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart and appointed him ruler of his people, because you have not kept the Lord’s command. (1 Samuel 13:14) You may remember David for being a king or for beating Goliath in an epic battle. David’s story is one of those Bible stories that inspires us to face with courage whatever God lays before us. However, one of the noteworthy moments in David’s story was when God said that he was “a man after God’s own heart.” David was far from perfect. He was a shepherd turned king. He committed adultery with Bathsheba and then arranged her husband’s death. He messed up again and again, however we can see in the Psalms that David had a deep love for God and a willingness to repent, and that he met with God often. When he sinned, he didn’t hide; he repented and turned back to God because his relationship with God mattered most and he wanted to be aligned with him. It’s encouraging to note that God chose David to lead because of his pure desires for God, not because he was the best behaved, most talented, or most skilled in the world’s terms. What does that mean for us? We are all called to follow Jesus, and that means we are to live in harmony with what God’s heart desires for his people. As our kids grow up, it can be easy for them to follow their own hearts or what others want. But we can encourage them to make decisions and lead others based on God’s desires, not earthly desires, and that is hard! Let’s pray that our kids are known as people after God’s own heart and that each of our children reflects the heart of God in their schools, communities and friend circles. Father, please help __________ to desire what you desire. Lead them to live in a way that’s pleasing to you. I pray they know your heart more and more each year. Give them a heart like David’s, one that seeks you above all else and makes time to meet with you day after day. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I have a new bucket list item: I want to go to Uganda and meet Josh’s mom! What a woman. Josh Poro is a pastor and father from Uganda that has been living here in my town of Colleyville for the last 7 years. I was curious to chat with him about what “parenting” looks like in Uganda vs America. Sometimes, I need to shake things up in my life and get out of the bubble I am living in. I like to listen to unique podcasts or watch compelling documentaries to expand my mind. This is the purpose of this episode. I wanted Josh to shake up our Western view of Christianity and parenting in a way that challenges us. My favorite part is when he talks about the power of prayer. He challenges us in America to pray longer and bolder. And to keep praying for our children again and again. If you’d like to see more of Josh’s sermons - visit his YouTube channel (Kingdom INSights Ministries - Apostle Joshua Poro). Enjoy! Courtney Chapters: (00:00) Introduction to Josh Poro's Journey (02:57) Life in Uganda: Culture and Challenges (05:59) Journey to the US: Asylum and New Beginnings (08:57) The Importance of Prayer in Family Life (12:01) Cultural Differences in Prayer Practices (14:57) Teaching Children About Faith and Prayer (18:01) The Role of Mothers in Spiritual Upbringing (30:01) Cultural Perspectives on Parenting (32:55) Empowering Children for Independence (36:04) The Power of Prayer in Parenting (44:23) Parenting as a Ministry Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Josh Josh’s youtube page - Kingdom INSights Ministries - Apostle Joshua Poro Sign up to volunteer at Josh’s new church  NIV Application Bible Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Jonathan went to find David and encouraged him to stay strong in his faith in God. (1 Samuel 23:16 NLT) Jonathan and David were opposites and unlikely friends, but their friendship was so strong that it continues to be cited as a prime example of a God-honoring friendship to this day. Jonathan had every reason to feel envious of David: Jonathan was heir to the throne, yet God chose David to be king. Jonathan even risked his life to protect David from his father and strengthen David in the Lord when he needed it. Jonathan was a selfless and loyal friend who continually pointed David back to God. No doubt, God placed Jonathan in David’s life for a reason. He knew that David would need a friend to strengthen him in his role, his confidence, and his faith. Friendships come and go, and the friends our kids have right now may or may not be their friends in the future. There is a time and place for temporary friendships—friendships that are fun and fulfilling and safe, but don’t stand the test of time for one reason or another. It’s the lifelong friendships that are sacred. The friendships where you know the other person is with you no matter what and will challenge you to be a better person and a more faithful Christ follower. Our desire as parents should be that our kids have at least one of those friends. This week, let’s pray that our kids are not fair-weather friends. Let’s pray that they are committed, loyal, selfless friends who strengthen their friends’ faith in God. And let’s pray they find those same friends in return. Father God, please help __________ to be a God-honoring and good friend to others. Help them to say no to jealousy, gossip, and comparison and yes to compassion, encouragement, and joy in their friendships. Help them to find friends who sharpen and strengthen their faith in you and may you be the center of all their relationships. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that once a month we are doing a mentor episode? We will cover a different topic each month in hopes to provide helpful content for you and your local mentor. 1) listen to the episode 2) talk about it with a mentor or friend that is a season ahead of you If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the first few episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with GodMy Virtual Mentor: Personalities and Temperaments If you have been around this podcast for any length of time, you know that I am passionate about generosity. I was raised in a home that lived out their faith with generosity. The biblical concept of generosity and stewardship is one that gives meaning and purpose to my daily life. It’s been so fun to pass down this legacy of generosity to my kids and watch them step into this way of life. Today, I have the absolute honor of interviewing Boyd Bailey. Boyd is the President of the National Christian Foundation (NCF) in Georgia. He is also the author of several books, including his latest, The Power of Generosity: Experiencing God’s Amazing Abundance - How to Change the World Through Acts of Kindness. My favorite part is when he shares a GREAT idea. He gives his grandkids money at Thanksgiving and they come back together at Christmas to talk about what they did with the money and time. What a fantastic tradition! I am 100% doing this. Enjoy! Chapters: (00:00) Introduction and Personal Connection (02:00) Boyd's Current Endeavors and Family Involvement (04:06) Understanding Stewardship and Generosity (10:03) Practical Generosity in Family Life (18:03) Hearing from God and Spiritual Growth (22:01) Benefits of Generosity in Relationships (24:58) The Impact of Generosity on Family Dynamics (29:07) The Power of Generosity Book Overview MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (INTIMACY WITH GOD) Scripture to memorize: Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21 Scriptures for prayer and study: Matthew 6:19-21 Matthew 5:14-15 I Timothy  6:7 Matthew 25:23 Books for further study: The Power of Generosity by Boyd Bailey A Life Well Spent by Russ Crosson Love Your Life Not Theirs – Rachel Cruze The Truth About Money Lies – Russ Crosson Discussion questions: Did your parents teach you about the concept of stewardship? Are you aligned on finances with your spouse?  Where have you seen generosity impact your own life?  What are some practical ways you can practice generosity in this season? Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Boyd National Christian Foundation The Power of Generosity - Boyd’s latest book Wisdom Hunters Saving Susan  Light ‘Em Up Acts - Courtney’s act of kindness program Winshape Marriage Retreats Center for Relational Care  Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide NIV Application Bible Super Simple Science with Dr. Fizzlebop Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord. (1 Samuel 1:27–28) Hannah wanted a child more than anything else. During Old Testament times, the most important thing a woman could give to a husband was a child, specifically a son. Not having any children was considered a curse and a disgrace, maybe even a result of sin. Hannah was distraught that she could not produce a son for her husband. How did Hannah deal with her emotions? She cried and she prayed. She never gave up or doubted God; she trusted him for a miracle and promised the Lord that if he gave her a son, she would give him back to the Lord (1 Samuel 1:11). God heard her prayers, and he blessed her with a son, Samuel. Here is where my mind is blown: True to her word, Hannah returned Samuel to the temple when he was done weaning, meaning she likely raised her beloved child for two to four years and then gave him over to the temple for training. Can you imagine that level of sacrifice and trust in God? Hannah prayed without ceasing, and then when God blessed her greatly, she handed over her blessing knowing that God had a better plan. Samuel eventually became a great prophet, anointing the first king of Israel! Hannah’s faithfulness to prayer changed the course of Israel’s history. We may not know what impact our prayers have on our children, their future, or the world. But like Hannah, we can trust that God knows the outcome and it will be good. This week, let’s pray for our kids’ futures, and let’s also pray that our kids have a big prayer life that makes an impact on generations to come. Lord, help me to have a faith like Hannah’s, holding __________ with open hands, knowing you have the best plan for their life. I pray that __________ will bring all their struggles, their hopes, their dreams, and their plans to you in prayer. Give them patience to trust in your timing, knowing that your plans are always better. And may their prayers impact generations of believers. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this week’s podcast, Lee Strobel is BACK to talk about the Nativity story. He shares about challenging common perceptions and interpretations. I absolutely loved hearing the detail and history around the “manger” which was more like a guest room. And he gives us some more clarity around the date of Christmas and how it was chosen. It was so interesting for me to hear from Lee which nativity details have been misunderstood or overemphasized or even simplified. This would be a great episode to listen to with your kids! As a former atheist and investigative journalist, Lee’s heart is to give us a “Case for Christmas” and ultimately point everyone to his savior Jesus Christ. My favorite part is at the end - do not miss it! His story brought me to tears about how he experienced Jesus when he was an atheist. It was the generosity of Christians that drew him to God. What a powerful reminder that God is using everything for his glory and you never know who is watching. I am so thankful for our community and hope you had a restful week with your family. Take just a few moments to let your kids share what they are grateful for this year.  Happy Thanksgiving!!! Courtney DeFeo Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Lee Strobel Case For Christmas  Is God Real ? for Teens Lee on Shawn Ryan Show Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done. I will be filled with joy because of you. I will sing praises to your name, O Most High. (Psalm 9:1–2 NLT) There is a story in the book of Luke where Jesus heals ten men with leprosy. The lepers saw Jesus coming, stood at a distance, and called out for him to heal them. When he did, just one of the lepers came back to thank him. The leper didn’t just thank him, he praised him in a loud voice and threw himself at Jesus’s feet. He was filled with gratitude. This man’s life was changed; he knew it and he was not going to be silent about it. The crazy thing is that this man was a Samaritan, meaning he had never known the one true God until Jesus came and changed his life forever. That type of gratitude, that realization that Jesus has completely saved us, moves us to love Jesus more. We live in a much easier world. There is no leprosy for us to fear, medical care is accessible, and grocery stores are fully stocked. We can even have something delivered to us the same day, using just our face to pay. Our life is pretty good! It’s amazing! The downside is that it’s a lot harder to feel grateful for the everyday things God has blessed us with. Our hearts are easily hardened and discontent. But we can be truly grateful for the gift of salvation every single day. Life may not be perfect every day, but Jesus loves us every day. Having a thankful heart toward him will draw us closer to him and increase our joy! It’s hard to be grumpy when you are being thankful! Let’s pray that our kids recognize Jesus’s gifts to them every day and that they move closer to him and praise him in response! Lord, I pray that you would remind __________ daily of your love for them, that they would practice praising you for who you are and thanking you for your many blessings on a regular basis, that you would cultivate in them a grateful heart, and that you would help me model this in our home too! If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Does anyone else feel like the holidays keep getting crazier and crazier? Busier and busier? On the podcast this week is Niro Feliciano. You may recognize from her regular appearances on The Today Show. She is a certified cognitive therapist, the co-founder of Integrative Counseling and Wellness Group in Wilton, CT and the author of All is CALMish. I love her professional insight and perspective on the pressure of Christmas. She reminds that the mental health of our families will benefit as we prioritize our presence over the perfection of Christmas. Niro reflects on the significance of holiday celebrations and the importance of meaningful connections of superficial interactions. She shares her journey of reevaluating how she celebrates the holidays, empathizing with the need for deeper connections with loved ones and a more intentional approach to social gatherings.  My favorite part is when Niro encourages us moms to find “micro moments of joy” during the holidays. As a mom, we can spin our wheels to make everything magical for all and we forget to encounter Jesus and take care of ourselves. What are some little things you can do to dial in the peace and joy and dial out the pressure and stress?   Before we dive right into the same Christmas chaos, let’s pray for God to order our days. How can we spend more time in the presence of Jesus? How can we focus on being over doing? What traditions and parties and commitments can we delete or pause to add more capacity? Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters: 00:00 Navigating Holiday Stress 03:00 The Pressure of Perfection 06:07 Creating Meaningful Traditions 08:59 Connection Over Perfection 12:00 Finding Joy in Giving 14:55 Holiday Experiences in the City 15:32 Embracing the Holiday Spirit 18:20 Navigating Family Dynamics 25:31 Setting Boundaries for Joy 27:50 Modeling Joy for Future Generations Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Niro All is CALMish - Niro’s new book Light ‘Em Up Acts - ideas for giving  NIV Application Bible Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Then Samson prayed to the Lord, “Sovereign Lord, remember me. Please, God, strengthen me just once more, and let me with one blow get revenge on the Philistines for my two eyes.” (Judges 16:28) Samson is known for his great strength and his great weaknesses. He was physically strong enough to kill a lion with his bare hands, and in the twenty years he led Israel, he killed hundreds and thousands of Philistines on his own. His weaknesses were his hair (it had to be long in order for him to be strong) and women. These weaknesses got him into trouble and eventually he was captured and the Lord left him. But in his final moments, he prayed for God to remember him and give him strength one more time, and the Lord answered. Samson reminds us that we all have strengths and weaknesses. And even our strengths have to be used wisely in order to honor God. But at the end of the day, God is full of mercy, and he can redeem even our greatest weaknesses when we turn to him and ask him. There may be times in our children’s lives when they turn away from God. They may go as far as rejecting Christ, or they may not honor him with their choices. But no mistake is too big for God. There is nothing our kids can do that God cannot redeem; he is always ready to restore us when we turn back to him. This week, let’s pray that our kids always follow God and honor him. But if they make mistakes or walk away, let’s pray that they turn back to God, ask for mercy, and experience God’s amazing redemption. Jesus, thank you for your amazing grace that restores us back to God. I pray that __________ will follow you all their life. But if they fall away, may they experience your redemption in a powerful way. Redeem the pain that they experience in their life, and even the mistakes they will make. Remind them that you are bigger than everything! I pray they are always confident in your goodness and in your desire to be in right relationship with them. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you going through an unwanted divorce? Or have a friend or family member going through an unwanted divorce? This powerful episode with Lysa TerKeurst is for you. I’m so thankful that Lysa is using her own divorce experience, healing journey and biblical understanding to encourage other women. Lysa shares about the significant challenges of an unwanted divorce. She shares about the unhelpful comments and verses thrown at people that choose divorce. She walks us through the powerful combination of theology and therapy and how those two things were key in her healing journey. This episode isn’t really for the person trying to determine IF they should divorce, it’s really for those that are already walking through the divorce from a destructive marriage and how to move forward.  My favorite part is at the very end when she talks directly to the woman walking through an unwanted divorce. Her words are so tender and so encouraging. I am praying you will feel so seen.  Enjoy! Courtney Chapter (02:46) The Need for a New Book (05:23) Understanding Divorce and Its Impact (08:19) Theological Insights on Divorce (11:05) Resources for Support (13:47) Identity and Self-Worth (15:19) Coping Strategies During Divorce (15:39) Finding Wholeness After Divorce Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Lysa Surviving an Unwanted Divorce - new book Surviving an Unwanted Divorce - podcast series Emily Lex Watercolor What to Say and How to Say it to Your Teen Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide The Biggest Story Holy Bible for Kids Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

But Ruth replied, “Don’t ask me to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God.” (Ruth 1:16 NLT) We often hear Ruth 1:16 recited at weddings, and rightfully so; it is a beautiful verse about family and loyalty. When Ruth’s husband died, she decided to stay with her mother-in-law, Naomi, even though it meant leaving behind life as she knew it. Eventually she married again. Ruth’s new husband was a good and kind man named Boaz, and she remained faithful in caring for her mother-in-law. It would have been easy for Ruth to leave Naomi and start over. In fact, that is what Naomi tried to convince her to do. But Ruth was loyal to Naomi and to God, and she loved them both. Because of her kindness, God gave her a new family and a special place in his story—she became great-grandmother to King David, making her part of the lineage of Jesus. God can do anything with anyone when they are faithful. As parents, we have the opportunity to model the value of family, show our kids what it means to honor God by honoring each other, and raise our kids up to be loyal and kind. We would do anything for our kids, but even so, there will be times in parenting when it feels like your kids would choose to follow anyone else but you. In those moments, lean in and lavish them with love. We get to show them the love of Jesus in the way we parent them! Eventually that love will prepare them for their own family, and hopefully they will be as loyal to them and to God as Ruth was. This week, let’s pray that our kids love and serve their current and future families with loyal hearts. Father God, you are the perfect father. Help __________ to love and serve their family. May they be loyal, kind, and faithful. May they trust in my guidance as a parent. And most importantly, may they trust in you as their perfect parent and stay faithfully devoted to you all the days of their life. May they never know a day without being in your presence. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that once a month we are doing a mentor episode? What does that mean? I have come across a lot of moms that desperately want a mentor, but don’t have time to read a book. So! Each month, there will be a podcast topic and your only job is to: 1) listen to the episode 2) talk about it with a mentor or friend that is a season ahead of you If you’re just getting started - don’t miss the first couple episodes: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship MattersMy Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with God When I was mentored as a young mom, the topic of "personalities" was one of the most impactful lessons. I learned to study myself, my spouse and my kids and the benefits have been huge in my life. I am still learning all of us!  On today’s episode, we get to hear from author, speaker and podcaster Karen Stubbs. Karen is the founder of Birds On A Wire Moms and has ministers to thousands of moms all over the world. She is passionate about challenging moms to experience motherhood in the way God designed it. Karen gets practical about how to learn temperaments and personalities for ourselves, our spouses and each of our kids. She also reminds us that we can partner with the Holy Spirit to refine us and grow us - so that we look more and more like Him.  If you’d like to dive deeper into this topic, you will find discussion questions, book referrals, personality tests, scripture verses and more below. Enjoy! Courtney MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (INTIMACY WITH GOD) Scripture to memorize: I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Psalm 139:14-15 Scriptures for prayer and study: Galatians 5:16, 22-23 Isaiah 64:8 Ephesians 2:10 Books for further study: Wired That Way - Marita Littauer A Grown-Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring by Kathleen Edelman Personality Plus for Couples by Florence Littauer Personality Plus for Parents by Florence Littauer Love Languages by Gary Chapman The Road Back to You – Ian Cron, Suzanne Stabile Discussion questions: What are some of your strengths and weaknesses? And your husband’s? How can you balance each other out as a couple? How did God wire each of your kids? Strengths and weaknesses? What temperaments do you need to be aware of in each kid - as you parent them? (02:48) Understanding Personalities and Temperaments (05:38) The Importance of Knowing Yourself (08:26) Navigating Love Languages in Relationships (11:09) The Role of Awareness in Personal Growth (14:05) Integrating Faith with Personality Insights (15:07) Understanding Personality Types in Parenting (17:59) Navigating Different Personalities in Children (24:18) The Importance of Personality Awareness in Parenting (29:48) Embracing the Journey of Motherhood and Grandmotherhood Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: My Virtual Mentor: Why Mentorship Matters My Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with God Connect with Karen Birds On A Wire FREE personality quiz from Karen Enneagram Assessment Spiritual Gift Assessment  Raising Boys & Girls Personality Series - start HERE Wired That Way - Marita Littauer A Grown-Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring by Kathleen Edelman Personality Plus for Couples by Florence Littauer Personality Plus for Parents by Florence Littauer Love Languages by Gary Chapman The Road Back to You – Ian Cron, Suzanne Stabile Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Father Yourself First NIV Application Bible The Biggest Story Holy Bible for Kids Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? (James 2:14) Rahab is an unlikely hero. She started as a Canaanite prostitute, meaning she was a fallen woman living in a fallen city, and she eventually was listed in the genealogy of Jesus. Rahab’s life shows us that while faith is not about our works, a bold faith is actively lived out. When two Israelite spies came to Rahab’s home in Jericho, she protected them because she had heard about the things God had done. She turned away from her religion and her culture and put her trust in God. Because of this, Rahab and her family were spared when Jericho fell. In order to be saved, she had to place a scarlet cord on her window. Rahab obeyed this command knowing that she had to obey God in order to be saved. Her faith led her to action. Faith in Jesus transforms every part of us, including our actions. Our kids will have many chances to live their faith out loud. Sometimes that will mean taking a risk or standing out from the crowd. It might look like standing up for someone who is being picked on, leaving a party, putting an end to a rumor, or speaking God’s truth to someone they care about. We can encourage our kids to let God’s truth shape their actions, because when we do that, God does incredible things. This week, let’s pray that our kids move beyond simply believing in God in their hearts, and move toward acting boldly on that belief. Father God, help __________ to believe in you so deeply that their actions are changed. May their life reflect your love, grace, and goodness. When it’s easier to blend in, give them the faith to stand up for you and your ways. May they live a life that glorifies and expands your kingdom. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I love the topic of family legacy! The Robertsons surely have made a name for their family that is all about faith. Joining me today on the podcast is author, speaker and TV star Korie Robertson. She is so genuine and the love that she has for her family is so evident. You have likely seen the Robertson family through their show Duck Dynasty but I love that we hear about Korie’s side of the family too. What a tremendous legacy of faith! We chat about her experiences and insights on grandparenting, family legacy, and parenting adult children. She has always put an emphasis on “kindness” and “strength” in her home. What are some virtues or values that you hope to pass down through the generations? I love that her family called them the “Howard Principles for Life.” My favorite part is when she talks about the importance of community and church as you are raising a family. I love that reminder because it is easy to isolate ourselves these days and we need each other. And it’s almost November, which means my Christmas decorations are going up!!! Enjoy! Courtney Chapters (00:00) Embracing the Grandma Life (02:49) Family Legacy and Heritage of Faith (05:43) Intentional Parenting Values (08:27) The Importance of Kindness and Strength (11:19) Navigating Parenting Challenges (14:04) Mentorship and Community Support (16:56) Parenting Adult Children (19:50) Encouragement for Young Moms (22:45) Faith, Hope, and Love in Uncertain Times Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Korie Duck Dynasty: The Revival on Hulu  Strong and Kind by Korie Robertson  The Blind - movie based on Phil and Kay’s story LO Sister - Sadie’s ministry Quote by Dr Amen on guilt Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Operation Christmas Child Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9) Joshua was one of only two people who left Egypt and entered the promised land. He was a military leader and a spy, and eventually took over as leader of the Israelites after Moses died. He continually led the Israelites into battle and trusted in God’s promise that they would reach and enter the promised land. Through all the battles and all the whining of the Israelites, it would have been easy for Joshua to feel overwhelmed, defeated, and afraid. And he probably did! But God continually reminded him to be strong and courageous. God did not want Joshua to rely on himself; he wanted Joshua to rely on him. We live in a world that tells us to “believe in yourself.” In reality, that’s a lot of pressure to put on ourselves, and it’s a lot of pressure for kids to feel. As Christian parents, we know a better way. When our kids doubt themselves, when they are nervous, they don’t feel good enough, and fear of failure quietly creeps into their minds, our job is to remind them that God is with them. He will never leave them or forsake them, so they don’t have to be brave on their own. True courage does not come from relying on ourselves; it comes from relying on the one who never fails. This week, let’s pray that our kids feel strong and courageous because of God’s never-ending presence in their life. Jesus, help __________ to feel strong and courageous—not because they know it all and can do it all but because they have access to you who does know it all and can do it all. Help them to remember that they don’t have to muster up their own energy and strength; they can talk to you, and you will lead them just like you have led your people before. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode is one we don’t want to think about - but we must. The average age of first exposure to pornography is between age 8 and 11. Porn is everywhere. As a parent, it can feel super intimidating and scary to think about these discussions. How do we talk to our kids? What language do I use? When is the right time? How can I protect them? How can I help through this struggle? Greta Eskridge is the author of How to Talk to Your Kids About Porn and she has a personal story of how porn almost ruined her family. You will love her honesty about her own story, her passion to help other families and the practical ways you can begin to protect your kids. My favorite part is when she shares about our reaction as parents. We want our kids to come to us whenever they are in trouble. We want to be a safe place so a calm and steady response is required. It is natural to react in anger and fear - but don’t forget it’s not too late. She encourages parents to circle back and remind your child that they are loved and you are there to help. She also encourages us as Christians parents on how to give them a “why” that ties this issue to their faith and God’s best plan for their life. Don’t miss this one! Courtney (01:03) The Journey to Addressing Pornography (02:36) Starting the Conversation with Kids (05:34) Creating a Safe Space for Discussion (08:22) Navigating Technology and Safety (13:05) Understanding the Impact of Pornography on Teens (19:45) The Role of Parents in Teen Conversations (24:28) Resources and Hope for Healing Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Greta Greta Eskridge Podcast It’s Time To Talk to Your Kids About Porn by Greta Eskridge Good pictures, bad pictures - book for young kids God Made All of Me - a book to help children protect their bodies Song on “private parts” Protect Young Eyes - router info and more Romans 12:12 Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Beyond the Sex Talk podcast series - Gracebased podcast Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you.” (Exodus 4:14) Aaron was chosen by God to support Moses in leading the Israelites out of Egypt. When Moses doubted his ability to speak, Aaron stepped in and delivered God’s messages to Pharaoh. He was Moses’s helper! He wasn’t the main leader, but his role was still important—he stood beside Moses, helped perform miracles, and guided the Israelites. Later, God appointed Aaron as the first high priest; he had a time to support, and he had a time to lead. We know Aaron wasn’t perfect; he made a lot of mistakes, but God allows us to keep serving him despite our mistakes because he is full of grace. It’s natural for our kids to want to be the star of the show: the leader of the friend group, the starting player on the team, first in band, line leader. But Aaron’s life reminds us that God values leaders and the people who support them. Your child will lead at times, of course, but there will also be times when they need to humbly and graciously stand by the side of another leader. Sometimes being a friend, encourager, and helper is just as important as being in charge. This week, let’s pray that our kids seek the Lord, not the spotlight. Let’s pray that our kids honor God by serving where he places them, knowing it’s where they are meant to be to make the biggest difference. Lord, help __________ have a heart like Aaron’s—a heart that serves, supports, and honors you. Help them to remember that they don’t need accolades from people, because those are just temporary. Instead, help them to use their gifts to glorify you in every role that you call them to. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You will recognize the last name “Shankle” because Melanie Shankle is a frequent guest on Pardon The Mess. Melanie is one of my favorite authors out there and it’s so fun to have her daughter, Caroline Shankle, on the podcast today. She is so delightful and gives such a great perspective of what it’s like to be a young girl learning hard lessons with God by your side. She reflects on “3 giants teens are facing today.” From “fitting in” to “comparison” to “believing God is who He said He is.” It is so helpful for me to hear these things from a young girl that is part of my daughter’s generation. My favorite part is when she shares about her journey with her faith. How God made it real to her during her college years. She thought she wasn’t good enough to have a strong faith. What an encouraging reminder to our teens that God wants them “just as you are.”  Make sure you hug your teens today and remind them that their struggles are normal, validate their journey through difficult seasons, pray for them and remind them that God has them. And then send them this episode and let Caroline remind them that these giants don’t have the final say. Enjoy! Courtney Chapters (02:51) Life as a Grad Student and Author (05:46) The Journey to Writing a Book (08:40) Facing Giants: Fitting In and Comparison (11:40) Believing in God: A Personal Journey (14:30) Lessons from Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (17:23) Appreciating Family and Personal Growth (20:170 Fun Questions and Closing Thoughts Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Caroline Caroline’s new book - The Lion and the Bear  Melanie’s episode on Storytellers Live (watching Caroline struggle) Impact - A&M freshmen retreat Melanie Shankle on Pardon The Mess Here Be Dragons by Melanie Shankle Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Christian Parenting resources 10 Questions Series Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The greatest among you must be a servant. But those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. (Matthew 23:11–12 NLT) Moses’s life was full of ups and downs. But he is forever known as a great and humble leader. When Moses was born, Pharaoh had ordered all Hebrew baby boys to be killed, but God had a different plan for Moses’s life: He was saved by God’s plan and raised in Pharaoh’s palace. And in another turn of events, God called Moses to lead his people out of Egypt and out of slavery. Moses was a leader among the Israelites, and it cost him everything—his family, his lifestyle, his comfort, and his reputation. Moses was not always a confident leader; he initially doubted himself and asked God to send someone else. Someone more eloquent. Someone more prepared. Someone more capable. But the mission to free the Israelites wasn’t about Moses—it was about God. Humble leadership starts with putting God first and knowing that his power works through us. When we follow God, he directs our every step. God doesn’t call perfect leaders; he calls willing ones. Our kids may not lead a people group to freedom, but they will most likely have opportunities to stand up for what is right, help others, and lead others in the way of the Lord. They may feel unequipped at times, just like Moses did, but as parents, we can remind them that when God says go, we don’t say no—because he equips those he calls. This week, let’s pray that our kids grow to be leaders who rely on God’s strength before their own. God, I pray that __________ would be a faithful and humble leader who answers your call, follows you, and confidently relies on your strength to accomplish the tasks you set before them. When they feel unequipped or unprepared, remind them that you will give them all they need. Help them to take their focus off themselves and onto you and your power. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How are the habits of your family? How is your physical health? Mental health? Spiritual health? This is an episode that is so needed for couples. I would LOVE for you to listen with your spouse and then find time to discuss it. Justin Earley shares about this mental health breakdown as a young dad and how God brought him to this current place of healing. As you know, I have struggled with my health for many years and I needed every word of this episode.  We talk about the necessary merging of our physical health and our spiritual health. He shares some common misconceptions, practical tips to feel better and patterns that could help turn your entire family towards health. My favorite part is when he talks about God’s grace and the reminder that it’s not too late. We can change the direction our family is headed. We can change the direction we are headed. It may be slow but it can happen. I am so thankful for Justin’s story and this unique way of sharing God’s truth with real life lessons. Enjoy! Courtney  (02:57) Parenting Challenges and Prioritizing Family (05:40) The Impact of Work on Family Life (08:32) Mental Health and Parenting (11:27) Developing Healthy Habits (14:16) Spiritual and Physical Health Connection (17:08) The Role of Discipline in Parenting (19:58) The Importance of Self-Care (22:41) Miracles and Transformation (25:28) Conclusion and Encouragement Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Christian Parenting resources Connect with Justin The Body Teaches the Soul - newest book Habits of the Household  The Common Rule Made for People  Podcast episode about Family Rhythms with the Lyons Choosing to Cheat by Andy Stanley Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I will praise the Lord at all times. I will constantly speak his praises. I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart. Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together. I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:1–4 NLT) The story of Job is a tough story to read and process through. Why would God allow such immense suffering? Job was a righteous man and Satan knew it, so he challenged God and told him that Job would not continue to praise God if he took everything good away from him. Job lost his sheep, his servants, his kids, and his health. But Job continued to praise God. Despite his circumstances, he never stopped believing God was in control and would redeem his hurts. We want to protect our kids from hurt and loss. Even thinking of my kids suffering through extreme loss like Job makes my heart shatter. But the reality is that our kids will face some sort of loss. From small losses like not making the team to huge losses like the death of a loved one, each individual loss will feel like a hole in their heart. When they feel that, it is an opportunity for us to show them that faith in God is not about everything going right; it is about believing in his promises no matter what our circumstances are. It’s easy to love God when things are going right. Every good and perfect gift is from above, so we should praise God for all the good things he gives us. But God does not deserve our praise just because he blesses us, God deserves our praise because he saved us. God’s character remains the same regardless of our circumstances, so we can praise God for who he is, no matter what we are going through. This week, let’s pray that our kids turn to God when things get hard and know that he is continually working for good in their lives, even if they can’t see it. Jesus, you are good all the time. Please comfort __________ when they seem to be in an unending season of struggle like Job. And even in times of trouble and distress, I pray that __________ will praise you, knowing that your ways are not our ways, and your time is not our time, but you are always good and always with us. May they grow up to be a person who praises you in word and action through their entire life. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I believe the key to parenting, marriage and life is this topic right here - intimacy with God. Are we spending time with God? How do we do this as moms? What if we tried and it's too hard?  It can be so intimidating to learn about “quiet times” and “prayers.” We are joined today by author, speaker and Bible teacher Stacey Thacker. I love her heart for God’s word and prayer. She gives us so many practical and biblical reasons to make this a priority.  If you have a mentor (or are a mentor), you can use this episode and the show notes below to easily start a conversation. This is a topic worth discussing and will impact every area of your life. My favorite part is when Stacey reminds us that the point of getting in God’s word, is that God’s word gets into us. It really doesn’t matter how we do it - just that we are doing it. Let’s do this together this month and memorize Hebrews 12:1-3. Who is in? Put it on a post-it and hide that word in your heart.  Enjoy! Courtney MY VIRTUAL MENTOR GUIDE (INTIMACY WITH GOD) Scripture to memorize: Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 12:1-3) Scriptures for prayer and study: Matthew 6:33 Psalms 46:10  Colossians 3:16 Books for further study: A place of quiet rest – Nancy Leigh Demoss Discerning the Voice of God – Priscilla Shirer Women of the Word – Jen Wilkin Practicing the Way – John Mark Comer Discussion questions: What is your story of faith? How long have you been walking with God? What habits and disciplines help increase your intimacy with God? What are some practical tips for getting time with God? (00:00) Reconnecting and Family Dynamics (02:43) The Importance of Community and Mentorship (05:42) Quiet Time: Nurturing Your Relationship with God (11:25) The Power of Prayer in Difficult Times (17:20) Praying for Our Children: Strategies and Insights Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Stacey  Threadbare Prayer  Praying for Teen Girls Praying for Teen Boys The Holderness Family - Open Door, Not Empty Nest Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. (Genesis 50:20 NLT) Joseph had every reason to be angry and bitter at the world. His brothers picked on him, tricked him, and sold him into slavery. He was taken to Egypt where he was eventually imprisoned for something he didn’t even do. It would have been easy for Joseph to call life unfair and give up. But God gifted him the ability to interpret dreams, and Joseph used that gift to help himself and help others. He was raised up as a leader in Egypt and he saved many lives from famine—including the lives of his brothers. Practically speaking, we want our kids to use their giftings to help themselves: to excel in school, relationships, sports, music, jobs, etc. We know that when our kids lean into how God made them, they will thrive. But we also want them to use those gifts to expand God’s kingdom and help others. Joseph’s brothers meant to harm him, but they couldn’t outdo what God had planned: God planned to use Joseph for good. God made each of us, including our kids, perfectly and wonderfully with spiritual gifts to use for a good purpose. When we see those giftings in our kids, we have the privilege of encouraging them and building them up! Helping our kids discover and use their spiritual gifts well will help them see the bigger picture of how they fit into God’s kingdom. This week, let’s pray that our kids use the gifts that God has given them for the purpose he calls them to. Jesus, help us to see the spiritual gifts you have given __________ and build them up in those giftings. As they grow up, I pray they use their gifts to help others, help themselves, and bless you. Remind them that you use every circumstance for good, and mercy and goodness are the right choice, even when it’s hard to see. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have a child that is wrestling with their faith? Or maybe you fear this scenario with your little ones? What if they grow up and deny their faith or doubt God? What you will hear today through Alena’s story is that God is faithful. She is confident in that truth after a 7-year wrestling period with God. Alena’s quest to know God helped her to know herself in a foundational way. This conversation not only helped me as a mom, but as a follower of Christ. Alena is a creative, author, speaker, actor and more who is wise beyond her years. She always makes me think in a new and fresh way. My favorite part honestly is when she talks about the “ick” of women’s conferences. I could not get it together from laughing. She reminds me so much of her late mother Wynter Pitts. She is refreshingly honest, true to herself, wise and hilarious.  You will be encouraged to be patient with the wrestling periods of your own faith and your children’s faith. You will hear practical ways to support your children during their doubts. Be sure to check out her new devotional, God Is, available now for teen and young women. Enjoy! Courtney (00:00) The Emotional Journey of College Transition (02:59) Wrestling with Faith and Identity (05:48) Understanding God Through Personal Struggles (08:29) Navigating Parent-Child Relationships (11:26) Experiencing God's Presence in Grief (14:15) The Importance of Knowing God (17:08) Hearing from God in Everyday Life (19:51) Creative Pursuits and Personal Growth (22:44) The Impact of 'For Girls Like You' Magazine Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: God Is - Alean’s new devotional For Girls Like You Africa New Life Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. (Romans 5:3–5) Jacob fought and wrestled and did things his own way his entire life: He grabbed his twin brother’s heel as he was being born and then stole that same brother’s birthright. He was so angry that he left town. Talk about sibling rivalry! Years later when Jacob decided to return home, he came across a mysterious man and wrestled him all night. Jacob refused to quit until he received a blessing. Little did he know the man he was wrestling with was God. God changed his name to Israel—meaning one who struggles with God. Jacob was changed in that moment. He went from living life for himself to depending on God. He went from wrestling with God to clinging to him. Faith isn’t always easy. Our kids will face struggles, and they will try to do things their own way! Toddlers and teenagers alike notoriously doubt their parents’ abilities to know what is best and right at times. There will also be times when they doubt God’s ability to know what is best, wrestle with their understanding of him, or even try to live independently of him. Questions are a natural part of making faith your own. God welcomes our questions, our struggles, and even our doubts—they do not scare him! Instead, he meets us in them and draws us closer to him. As parents, we don’t have to be afraid of our kids’ questions either. It does us well to remember that faith is not linear and our kids will have many ups and downs as they journey through their lives of faith. This week, let’s pray that our kids persevere in their faith, that they go to God to get answers to their questions when they inevitably have doubts, and that they surrender to him instead of fighting against him. Jesus, I pray that ________ will lead a life of faith. Knowing there will be ups and downs and seasons of questions and doubts, I pray they will be confident going to you with all their feelings, questions and emotions. May they always remember that wrestling is worth it for a relationship with you. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. (It also makes a wonderful gift for grandparents or friends!) And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Buckle in for a fantastic and thought-provoking chat with author and speaker Vicki Courtney. Have you ever heard the phrase, “motherhood is your highest calling” ? Did you believe it? And do you agree with it? I love that Vicki is looking back as a grandmother and assessing this common phrase and belief that impacted her motherhood journey. She wants to help our generation properly grapple with our highest calling. She believes motherhood is a high calling but not THE highest calling. And there is a difference.  This statement isn’t just about semantics. If we believe motherhood is our highest calling, then the way we parent is informed and impacted by that belief. That belief ushers in perfectionism and pressure that’s not manageable. I loved this conversation and mindset shift - not just for myself but for my daughters. Let’s look to scripture and make sure we are all on the same page - that our highest calling is actually not motherhood. My favorite part is when Vicki talks about the trap of comparison at the end. She helps us dial down the guilt and increase the freedom that is found in Jesus. I am grateful for the encouragement and teaching of Vicki Courtney. Her work has mattered to me at every phase of motherhood.  Enjoy!  Courtney  (00:00) Reconnecting and Reflecting on the Past (04:49) The Journey of Motherhood and Writing (09:36) Rethinking Motherhood as a Calling (14:06) The Pressure of Perfectionism in Parenting (19:02) Finding Balance and Freedom in Motherhood (23:41) Embracing Identity Beyond Motherhood Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Vicki Motherhood is not your highest calling by Vicki Courtney Subscribe to Christian Parenting’s Friday Favorites Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5–6) Think about the amount of trust Abraham had in the Lord: He was told to leave his home and move to a new land and wandered for decades, not knowing where he was going, but he went anyway. He was told he would be the father of a great nation, but he didn’t have any kids. Then he was told he would have a baby when he was very old. Then God told him to go sacrifice his beloved son. There is a reason God made a covenant with Abraham that changed the course of the world: He had a deep trust in the Lord and in the Lord’s love for him. Even when something seemed impossible, Abraham believed God would be faithful. Looking at Abraham’s life teaches us that we don’t need to have all the answers to obey God; we just need to have unwavering trust in his goodness. God will be true to his promises, even though his timing and his ways are sometimes different from ours. God has a great plan for your child. We don’t know what that looks like: friends, activities, college, careers, relationships, kids. There are a lot of unknown variables at play and there is no glimpsing into the future, but God holds it in his hands. Trusting God means believing that he is leading our kids to their great future, even when we can’t see the whole picture. This week, let’s pray that our kids put their trust in the Lord just like Abraham did and stand firm in their faith when things feel uncertain. Lord, help __________ to trust you like Abraham did. Give them faith to follow where you lead them. Reveal your great purpose for their life to them and teach them to rely on your promises. May they walk in confidence knowing that you are always with them and they are deeply loved by you. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. (It also makes a wonderful gift for grandparents or friends!) And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

My natural reaction is to CONTROL my kids and I wish that wasn’t the truth. I know that the best thing for them and for me is to surrender all of it to God every day. Why is this so hard for me? Do you also struggle with wanting to control and hold onto your kids?  Join me today as I chat with Christy Nockels about this idea of surrendering our kids through various seasons. Christy has been writing songs and leading worship for more than 30 years. She is a wife and a mom living in the Nashville, TN area. My favorite part about Christy is her humility. Jesus just oozes through her music and her life. My favorite part is how she shares a couple of practical ways you can still connect with your kids as adults. And don’t forget to put her new album King Who Never Sleeps on repeat in your car and kitchen. It will feel like a balm to your soul. Enjoy! Courtney  (00:00) Introduction to Christy Nockels (02:55) The Heart Behind the New Album (05:43) Lessons in Surrender and Trust (08:26) Navigating Parenting Transitions (11:09) The Power of Prayer in Parenting (14:14) Being Present in the Moment Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Christy Christy’s book Christy’s podcast Christy’s new album - King Who Never Sleeps  Subscribe to Christian Parenting’s Friday Favorites Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Hey friends, today we are kicking off this year’s series that follows Christian Parenting’s brand new prayer journal, A Great Cloud of Witnesses. This is something that we look forward to every school year! If you're new here, every Monday I will share a short prayer to help you lift up your kids. Each week highlights a biblical hero of the faith, paired with Scripture-based prayers for your kids. Let's get started with week one: Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked faithfully with God. (Genesis 6:9) Noah was a great man of faith and obedience. During his lifetime, the Lord saw that the world was wicked. Genesis 6 tells us God saw that every inclination of the human heart and mind was evil, and he was deeply troubled by it. While everyone else on earth was living apart from God, Noah looked different. He was righteous, meaning he was in a right relationship with God. Because of his righteousness, God entrusted Noah with an incredible task—build an ark to his specific measurements and rescue humankind and animals from a great flood. And we all know what happens after that: They were safe and preserved life on earth. It sounds crazy and it probably looked crazy. But Noah and his family confidently lived in a way that was outside the norm because of their faith. No doubt Noah was ridiculed for his righteousness both before and while he was building the ark. But he trusted God’s word even when it didn’t make sense, and isn’t that what we want for our kids as well? There will be times when following Jesus means standing alone, making choices that others don’t understand, getting made fun of, or trusting God in uncertain circumstances. It is not always easy to live a righteous life. This week, let’s pray that our kids grow to be confident in their faith, listen to God’s voice over any others, and choose to live in a right relationship with the Lord even when it looks a little (or a lot) different from the norm. Lord, help __________ to have a faith like Noah. Help them to grow in righteousness and focus on you and your ways before anything else. When life is challenging or circumstances don’t make sense, may they walk in your ways, knowing that they are always good and that you are always faithful. Amen. If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. (It also makes a wonderful gift for grandparents or friends!) And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes.  Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I need EVERYONE to listen to this episode! It’s the kickoff episode for this upcoming school season and you will hear about an exciting new mentor program. I feel more excited than ever to be hosting Pardon The Mess this year. I feel expectant at what God is about to do IN and THROUGH our listeners. I believe it will be a multiplying year for all of us. I prayed for God to give me direction, discernment and a fresh wind for these upcoming episodes. I do not take it lightly that you trust me with your time and heart and I want to steward that well. Pray with me that God moves through these episodes to reach people for Jesus and that we glorify Him through our families. In today’s episode, you will have just me! I will share my journey with “mentorship” and invite you to join me all year. Maybe God is calling you to disciple or mentor a younger woman or maybe God is nudging you to reach out to a mentor. Either way, this episode will set you up for success and remind you why it matters. At the end of this week’s episode, I will answer some of your parenting questions. From parenting new drivers to teen girls to young adults - parenting is so hard and we all need practical help. I share some resources and encouragement around a few topics. Let me know what other questions you have. Simply DM me over at Pardon The Mess Podcast on Instagram and I will make a note for our next Q&A episode. Enjoy! Courtney  (00:00) Welcome to Part of the Mess (01:22) The Power of Prayer and Community (02:38) Embracing Mentorship (04:52) The Importance of Discipleship (10:34) Introducing My Virtual Mentor (15:06) Reframing Your Role as a Mentor (20:02) Practical Steps for Mentoring (22:42) Q&A: Addressing Parenting Challenges Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Camp Winshape Praise God, All Creatures Subscribe to Christian Parenting’s Friday Favorites Spiritual Goals Compass Church - Women’s Fall Kickoff Compass Church - Mentor Program Johnson Ferry Baptist - Titus 2 Mentoring Goals Sheet Doing Life With Your Adult Children - book by Jim Burns I’m happy for you, sort of, not really - book by Kay Wyma  The Lion and the Bear - devotional by Caroline Shankle  God Is - devotional by Alena (Pitts) Franklin  The Better Friend - book by Grace Valentine Girl Mom Podcast by Kari Kampakis Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It’s time for another school year. I am sure you’ve shopped for backpacks and school supplies and all of the things. Have you made a plan for how you will pray for your kids this year? I would argue it’s one of the most important things you can do for your family. Today’s guest is prayer warrior, author, TV host, speaker and Bible teacher, Jodie Berdnt. She has authored a series of books entitled Praying Scriptures. She has a book for little kids, teens up to adults. During our chat, she shows us some practical ways we can use God’s word to pray for our kids. Watch this episode on YouTube so you can see the little hands she traces for her kids and grandkids. So cute! My favorite part is that she talks about the biggest benefit or praying for our kids. Prayer unlocks the door to peace and security as a mom. I loved her encouragement that we can simply let go through the process of prayer. We can acknowledge that God is doing the work and He really cares for our kids. He can accomplish things that we never could as a mom. Wow! It’s just what I needed to hear at the start of another school year. Love, Courtney Chapters (00:00) Introduction and Personal Background (02:54) The Importance of Local Community (05:24) Prayer and Its Impact on Parenting (07:54) The Journey of Praying Scriptures for Children (11:19) Transformative Power of Prayer (13:57) Practical Prayer Strategies for Moms (16:43) Long-Term Prayer for Children (19:37) Praying for Teens and Young Adults (22:20) Encouragement for Moms (24:59) Closing Thoughts and Blessings Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Camp Winshape Brave Books Connect with Jodie Jodie’s Books MomLife - Jodie’s show  Moms in Prayer   Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We’ve got another great episode here at Pardon The Mess with Jessica Robertson. In this conversation, Jessica shares about her journey of faith, family and the importance of adoption. She reflects on her upbringing in a Christian home, the legacy of her father-in-law Phil Robertson, and the values instilled in her family. Jessica discusses the emotional journey of adopting her son and the challenges and joys that come with it. I loved hearing her heart for adoption and how that has impacted her own faith. My favorite part is at the end when she shares about what God is teaching her in motherhood right now. He has been pressing on her to slow down and enjoy the kids at every phase. That is a great challenge for this week. How can we slow down? Can we hug a little longer, stay at the park a little longer or linger at the kitchen table? Let’s not be so rushed that we miss moments with the gifts from above - our children. Does everyone have their Prayer Journal? I’m excited to pray together through this school year. Join me! Enjoy! Courtney (00:00) Introduction and Family Background (05:45) The Journey of Adoption (11:15) Challenges and Joys of Parenting an Adopted Child (16:31) The Heart of Adoption and Fostering (21:27) Dear Valor: A Story of Adoption (26:56) The Power of a Mother's Love and Presence Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Jessica Jep and Jess Growing the Dynasty Dear Valor - her newest book Brave Books All God’s Children Foster Village Camp Winshape Brave Books Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

One of our listeners reached out about her need for resources for her blended family. I am so glad she did! This episode is for all of those navigated blended families and stepfamilies. I learned so much through this chat with Ron Deal and hope we all lean in to gather more understanding of all of God’s beautiful families.  Ron L. Deal is a bestselling author, licensed marriage & family therapist, podcaster, and popular conference speaker who conducts “laugh and learn” marriage and family seminars and professional training around the country and online. He specializes in both marriage enrichment and stepfamily education. Frequently featured in the national media, Ron has worked full-time in marriage and family ministry since 1988 serving in both local churches and with FamilyLife®. He currently serves as President of Smart Stepfamilies™ and Senior Director of FamilyLife Blended®, a division of FamilyLife®. He is the most widely read and viewed author on blended families in the country. My favorite part is how Ron shares the complex nature of blended families but also gives hope! He reminds us that God is in this process and for your families. He also encourages parents to have patience for the timing of it all. Don’t give up!  Enjoy! Courtney  (0:00 - 2:00)Introduction to Ron Deal (2:01 - 10:00) The Complexity of Blended Families  (10:01 - 18:00) Patience and Time in Family Bonding  (18:01 - 25:00) Resources for Step-Parents  (25:01 - 32:00) Ron’s Personal Journey  (32:01 - 40:00) Mindful Marriage Book Discussion  (40:01 - End) Closing Thoughts and Call to Action  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Ron Smart Stepfamilies - books and resources Smart Stepfamilies - find a counselor  Family Life Blended The Mindful Marriage - new book and conferences Right Now Media Rachel & Rod Brown with Ron Deal (Family Life interview) Clear Focus Bible for Kids Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have a daughter or son headed off to college or maybe a high school senior? This episode is for you! I gathered three college sophomores and asked them all the questions. What are your dorm tips? Study tips? Rush tips? Now, these are three girls. So, I imagine we need to do another episode with some guys - because their perspective would be different. However, so much of what they shared is universal and helpful to all. Camryn, Caroline and Lucy offered such amazing encouragement for college kids on how to keep their faith a priority. I loved how they gave very practical tips from finding a mentor, finding a church, getting coffee with new friends and making a choice to spend time with God. My favorite part is when they share about what they appreciate about their moms. It’s so fun to hear from the mouths of grown kids what mattered in their lives. I pray that it will encourage you to keep loving God and loving your kids well.  (00:00) Introduction and Dorm Essentials (05:40) Study Tips for College Success (11:28) Navigating Rush: Tips and Insights (17:02) Maintaining Faith in College (22:49) Appreciating Parents and Their Influence Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources Mentioned School Simplified Overwhelmed Mom Brave Books Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We made it to the end of the Empty Nester Wisdom series! If you missed any of these episodes, I encourage you to go back and be sure you have a notebook. Each guest brought such wisdom and godly encouragement for all seasons of parenting, but especially the empty nest season. I’m so grateful for these women and the timing of this series. God knew I needed these chats just before I send Ella off to college.  Today’s guest is a dear friend and a trusted pastor of mine - Heidi Miller. She has been in ministry over 20 years and is currently serving as the Next Steps Pastor at my church, Compass Church. In this week’s episode, she shares about her journey with anxiety and what God has taught her through it all.  Whether your child is headed to pre-K or college or their first job, it is so easy to lay awake at night and just marinate in the worry. Heidi gives us such practical ways we can power through anxiety with God by our side. He has met her in anxiety through worship, prayer and community.  My favorite part is when she circles back to remind us all - that the thing she worried about most with Carlee was the very thing God used to transform her life. Praying you find deep encouragement and practical support today with this episode. Enjoy  Courtney  (00:00) Navigating Empty Nesting and Friendship (02:42) Understanding Anxiety in Parenting (05:31) The Journey of Acknowledging Anxiety (08:31) Finding God's Voice Amidst Anxiety (11:27) Practical Steps to Combat Anxiety (14:14) The Power of Community and Prayer (15:31) Navigating Parenting Challenges (19:08) The Importance of Prayer and Community (21:54) Surrendering to God at Night (24:49) Building Faith Through Everyday Moments (28:40) Creating a Welcoming Home for Others Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Heidi Compass Church Sisterhood/Mentor Event at Compass  Christy Nockels - King Who Never Sleeps Worship Playlist by Heidi and Courtney Lectio 365 Adventure Bible Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Wendy Blight is a passionate woman of God that has written numerous Bible studies and books to equip us as believers. She is on staff at Proverbs 31 and has encouraged and equipped countless moms through her career. This episode will feel like a warm embrace that only God can give.  Wendy has a unique gift of bringing grace, authentic support and deep encouragement wherever she goes. We need that as moms because we can be so hard on ourselves. This episode will leave you feeling really seen and really encouraged - no matter how it’s going at your house.  I loved how we ended with God’s word and how to make time for it. She offers grace yet again by recognizing the various seasons of motherhoods. If you have littles, getting a shower can feel daunting. So listen in as she shares some tips on staying close to God in every season of motherhood. Enjoy! Courtney (00:00) Introduction and Family Background (02:58) Wendy's Journey with Proverbs 31 Ministries (05:51) Navigating the Empty Nest Phase (08:32) The Importance of Communication and Apologies (11:33) Maintaining Relationships with Adult Children (14:16) Understanding Different Beliefs in Parenting (17:13) Lessons from Motherhood and Prayer (20:03) Reading the Bible in Different Seasons (22:47) Addressing Anxiety and Mental Health (25:42) Encouragement for Moms Facing Challenges (28:26) Closing Thoughts and Prayer Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo A GREAT CLOUD OF WITNESSES PRAYER JOURNAL Resources from today’s show: Connect with Wendy Blight Rest for your soul by Wendy Blight Proverbs 31 Ministries First 5 Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy Summer folks! This is the first episode in this series that I did not cry. You’re welcome. I wanted to get super practical with this one and asked Chrystal Hurst Evans to bring her best empty nest tips for us. She shares about ways we can start training and teaching our kids to live without us. From budgeting to cooking - she explains that much of this training happens well before their senior year. It’s a mindset shift earlier that helps make us all ready for those launching years. As a writer, speaker and gatherer, Chrystal has a massive passion for women and how to get us up and moving towards goals. She is that “you can do it” friend that will light a fire under your overwhelmed body.  My favorite is when she shares about how to be a student of yourself. She reminds us that we each have massive skills and gifts from God and we often need our circle of friends to point those out. As moms, we often lose confidence in our skills and it can cause fear as the kids leave the home. What will I do now? Do I have what it takes to change directions or careers now that my time is more flexible? Praying this episode greatly encourages you and provides practical ways to equip you and your family for a new season. In this episode, we chat about:   Drawing boundaries with adult kidsTeaching financial responsibility Learning yourself again - gifts, passions and skillsPrioritizing prayer as you have less control Enjoy! Courtney  (00:00) Introduction and Personal Background (03:03) Navigating the Challenges of Parenting (05:45) Building a Business with Family (08:50) Preparing for Empty Nesting (11:42) The Importance of Early Independence (14:29) Rediscovering Personal Passions (17:24) Recognizing Transferable Skills (19:37) The Journey of Self-Discovery (22:51) Embracing Change in Marriage (30:17) Faith and the Empty Nest Experience Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW Resources from today’s show: Connect with Chrystal  Join the Sister Circle 100 Days to Discovering the Gift of You - Chrystal’s latest book Christian Parenting Products Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We have another great episode in the Empty Nester Wisdom series with Empty Nest Coach and host of the Midlife Momma Podcast, Pamela Henkelman. It was so fun to watch her soar in this conversation and it’s clear she has a passion in this phase of motherhood. Pamela shares that this is a very sweet time of life that we can enjoy. We don’t need to dread this transition. It’s a season where we can rediscover our purpose and our joy. I know she will get you excited to look ahead to this new phase with excitement not dread. My favorite part is when she talks about her intentional thinking around relationships. She doesn’t just prioritize the relationship with her kids, she aims at loving their spouses well. Even if you’re 10 years out from being an “in-law,” tuck away this wisdom from a seasoned mom that is running her empty nest race well. In this episode, we chat about: Allowing children to grow independentlyConnecting with their spousesChoosing your words wisely with adult childrenLetting go of expectations with holidays Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters (00:00) Introduction and Personal Connections (02:57) Transitioning to Empty Nest Coaching (05:55) Navigating Relationships with Adult Children (08:57) Setting Boundaries with Adult Children (11:58) The Role of Spouses and In-Laws (15:00) Rediscovering Identity in Midlife (18:01) Embracing New Opportunities (20:49) Creating a Welcoming Home Environment (24:03) Success Stories and Client Transformations (26:46) Conclusion and Resources Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo 2025-2026 Prayer Journal: A Great Cloud of Witnesses Resources from today’s show: Connect with Pamela Henkelman Free! 10 things NOT to say to your adult child Sheepgate - addiction recovery in Iowa Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy Summer friends! We are continuing our series, Empty Nester Wisdom, with my friend Amy Fenton. Amy is a mom to three grown kids and she’s been serving in children’s ministry for over 30 years. She has a passion for equipping the local church and the young children that come into those doors.  Amy talks about raising three kids (two boys) as a single mom and how the local church supported them along the way. She had a desire for her boys to be influenced by strong Christian men - and she can look back now and see God’s faithfulness. I pray through this episode that many feel called to step into volunteering for kids and students at your local church. It matters! I loved her encouragement about finding a church that your kids actually enjoy. It may take sacrifice on your part, but consider prioritizing their needs in a church community when they are so young. I loved this practical yet profound advice for us all! In this episode, we chat about: Asking for help as a single momHow to find a local church Importance of role models our kids’ livesHow to support your children’s ministries  Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters: (01:24) Journey in Children's Ministry (02:46) The Importance of Volunteer Engagement (05:22) The Role of Community in Child Development (08:34) Finding the Right Church Environment (11:24) Balancing Parental Guidance and Faith (15:35) Reflections on Parenting and Counseling (17:07) Starting the Journey: Finding Support for Mental Health (19:01) Building a Supportive Community for Children (21:42) The Myth of the Parenting Checklist (22:54) The Role of Parents in Church Involvement (26:00) Rediscovering Self in the Empty Nest (29:07) Encouragement for Single Moms Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Connect with Amy ([email protected]) Curriculum at Think Orange  Amazing Life Foundation  Cross Point Church Raising Boys and Girl Amy’s episode on Raising Boys and Girls How to find a counselor for my child  Christian Parenting Products Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We have a rock star mom on the podcast today! Susan Peterson is a mom I have looked up to for years. She’s the co-founder of Relish, board member for Young Life and longtime volunteer serving Passion City Church and Illuminations. And fun little fact, she is the reason my little “ABC Scripture Cards” hit the market over 13 years ago. There are many parts of this I want every mom to hear, but make sure you hear her approach to the emotions of the empty nest stage. She didn’t think she would be sad when her kids left the home and was surprised by the mourning. She gives us permission to stop and feel it. Don't miss her advice to take the time to ask God what is next and take the time to mourn the season that you loved so much. I also loved her challenge to stop and thank God for the gift of being a mom and having kids in your home. Susan’s family has always traveled the globe serving God. As you will hear towards the end, she said that getting her kids out of their country was one of the best decisions they made. They were able to see God at work in the world. It changed each of them. So inspiring! I know you will absolutely enjoy this jewel of a human. Susan is a treasure and I’m delighted to share her words with you today. Praying you feel Jesus pour right through every minute. Enjoy, Courtney  (00:55) The State of Bible Translation (03:09) Navigating the Empty Nest (06:12) Finding Identity After Parenting (08:56) The Balance of Parenting and Faith (14:03) Lessons Learned from Parenting (18:02) Encouragement for Younger Moms (22:04) Final Thoughts and Resources Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Susan Relish Dottie Collection Young Life Illuminations 12 Verse Challenge First episode with Jennifer on PTM  Support Christian Parenting  NIV Application Bible Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We have Sharon Mankin back on the podcast! You all loved her wisdom and practical help the last time she was on the podcast. From the first minute to the end, you can see why Sharon is a coach to many women. She has empathy, understanding and practical tools to help us navigate challenging seasons.  This conversation is helpful to all moms in all seasons who want to “let go” of their kids in a healthy way. I am a lifelong learner and I crave wisdom from women that are ahead of me in their journey. If you are heading into the empty nester season, you will be extra encouraged by her insight, stories and tips. She reminds us that we can discover purpose beyond our parenting role. She reminds us that God is not done with us!  My favorite part is towards the end when she shares about how to know when to step in and when to stay calm and let our adult kids walk through their struggles. I will treasure this advice ahead of Ella’s college years.  In this episode, we discuss: Navigating empty nest stageEmotional journey of letting goHow to recalibrate our expectationsHow to discover purpose beyond parenting Enjoy! Courtney  (03:06) Navigating the Empty Nest Stage (05:56) Emotional Journey of Letting Go (08:57) Recalibrating Expectations with Independence (12:00) Understanding Codependency and Communication (15:01) Finding Joy in the Transition (17:56) Personal Growth and Rediscovering Identity (21:38) Discovering Purpose Beyond Parenting (24:51) The Importance of Disruption for Growth (25:35) Balancing Support and Independence in Parenting (28:40) Emotional Strength and Empathy in Parenting (30:39) Creative Ways to Love Your Kids from a Distance (37:50) Encouragement and Connection in Parenting Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Sharon First episode with Sharon on PTM Who Matters Most - relationship exercise  Touch Note - Post Cards Support Christian Parenting  Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You all LOVED our series “Empty Nester Wisdom” from two years ago so we are bringing it back. Mentors have played such a vital role in my parenting journey. For the next two months, we are going to learn from other wise and godly moms that are just a season ahead of us. This series isn’t just for those entering the empty nest season - it’s for all moms and all stages. Get your journals ready for the next 9 weeks - they all offer some advice and encouragement worth keeping. And possibly bring a tissue box.  I absolutely LOVED this chat with my buddy Jennifer Scott about the empty nest years. She shares so many pieces of wisdom as she has triplet kids all in college. I asked her what she’s glad they did as she looks back. Her answer was so encouraging to me. “We invested in a foundation of faith and foundation of relationship.”  We can do that parents! We can invest in our kids’ faith and in our relationship with them.  How do you know when to step in with your college or adult kids? Jennifer shares about how we must discern and lean on God to know when to hold back and when to show up. Don’t miss this episode! It’s for moms of all ages. I LOVE learning from moms ahead of me. Thank you Jennifer for always being willing to share your heart, your wisdom and how God is working in your life. It’s invaluable insight for the moms behind you.  Enjoy this empty nester wisdom with Jennifer. In this episode, we discuss:  Setting realistic expectations when college kids come homeResisting the urge to look back and nitpick how you parentedTrusting God with your kids when the story isn’t finishedKeeping relationship with your kid when we disagree with choices  Enjoy! Courtney Chapters: (02:55) Navigating Life Changes (06:12) Lessons in Parenting and Faith (08:52) Returning to the Workforce (11:58) The Challenge of Empty Nesting (15:01) Supporting Kids Through Struggles (18:01) The Reality of College Life (20:55) Reflecting on Parenting (24:11) Trusting God with Our Children Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Jennifer First episode with Jennifer on PTM  Christian Parenting resources Marriage Simplified NIV Application Bible Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You all LOVED our series “Empty Nester Wisdom” from two years ago so we are bringing it back. Mentors have played such a vital role in my parenting journey. For the next two months, we are going to learn from other wise and godly moms that are just a season ahead of us. This series isn’t just for those entering the empty nest season - it’s for all moms and all stages. Get your journals ready for the next 9 weeks - they all offer some advice and encouragement worth keeping. And possibly bring a tissue box.  Have you all watched the amazing show “Love On The Spectrum?” If not, you need to add that to your watch list for the summer. It’s a romantic documentary series as people on the autism spectrum look for love and navigate the changing world of dating and relationships. My guest today is Nicci Smith who is a mom, wife and fierce advocate of the autism community. Her son, Tanner, is one of the breakout stars of the show. Nicci is doing an amazing job of sharing her faith in her new found fame. In today’s episode, we hear from a seasoned mom of four grown kids and all that God has taught her along the way. She is so honest about her faith and her doubts which is so refreshing. She is also honest about how long she wanted to fix the autism out of Tanner. She provided invaluable wisdom to let go of control sooner. And to enjoy the exact child God gave to each of us. She shared that she’s thankful God didn’t answer her prayers to take the autism away.  Join us for the next 9 weeks and don’t forget to grab a journal and take notes from these wise mommas. What a gift! Enjoy! Courtney  (10:49) Acceptance and Letting Go (16:42) Trusting God's Plan for Our Children (18:40) The Power of Maternal Instincts (21:11) Navigating Sibling Dynamics in Special Needs Families (22:00) Fostering Compassion and Understanding Among Siblings (28:38) Transitioning to the Empty Nest Stage (31:08) Faith and Trust in Parenting Journeys Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Nicci Connect with Tanner Talk To Me, Sis podcast Christian Parenting products Marriage Simplified   Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Guess who’s back? My dear friend Dana Sheheane. I wanted to get super practical as we end this school year with “best of parenting one-liners.” What one-liners do you remember from your childhood? What works in your house? We go rapid fire today and cover many topics - but you will get a taste of how we tried to keep respect a priority in our homes. We also talk about the new wave of “gentle parenting” and get honest about our concerns for this approach. As a children’s pastor, Dana sees many kids that have not learned about authority and some simple obedience. Let us know what you think! I hope this episode is practically helpful for you - and you get some ideas on how to incorporate some helpful little phrases.  We compiled the list HERE (insert link) for you to print - and be sure to add your own. On social media this week, we will give you space to do that and we want to hear what’s working in your home.  Of course, the most effective and most lasting one liners you can ever use can be found in God’s word. Don’t forget to have scripture in your home and try to memorize as you go. You can find ABC Scripture Cards at Cleerely Stated - these are the updated versions of the cards I created for my kids when they were young. Looking back, I’m so glad these truths were hidden in their hearts from an early age. Congratulations on the end of the school year mommas - you did it! Love, Courtney  (02:50) Summer Plans and Community Engagement (06:00) Health Updates and Family Challenges (12:09) Parenting Insights and One-Liners (21:28) Navigating Disappointment and Attitude (22:34) Encouraging Independence in Problem-Solving (23:58) Instilling Values of Love and Acceptance (24:26) Awareness and Responsibility in Life (25:09) Teaching Accountability and Contribution (26:09) Raising Considerate and Kind Individuals (27:16) Understanding Self-Worth Beyond Appearance (28:21) Teamwork and Shared Responsibilities (29:40) Learning from Mistakes and Growth (30:57) The Importance of Punctuality and Respect (32:01) Assuming Positive Intent in Relationships (34:37) Planning and Responsibility in Adulthood (36:39) Setting Boundaries and Respecting No (37:10) The Power of Kindness and Empathy (41:31) Intentional Prayer and Connection with Children Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Link to one-liners PDF Dana’s first episode on PTM Mountain Brook Community Church Connect with Dana ABC Scripture Cards Scripture Affirmation Cards Noteworthy Prayers Noteworthy Kids Christian Parenting products Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne” (Hebrews 12:2 NLT) We have spent the last few months together praying for our kids to live a life of faith. We have prayed that they would know, love, follow, and share the good news of Jesus. Might I encourage you to continue in these prayers? Our job as a praying parent does not end just because this journal ends. Prayer is the very best gift you can give your kids and the only one that will last forever. Keep doing the hard and holy work of raising your kids in the faith, your work is not in vain and it does not go unnoticed. Continue to pray for your kids to have a lasting faith in Jesus and that they will keep their eyes on him, working to expand his kingdom until the end of their journey when they hear the Lord say, “Well done my good and faithful servant.”  Remember, a life of faith is not linear. Your faith story has ups and downs and your kids’ faith stories will have ups and downs, too. So no matter where your kids currently are or will be in their faith journey, do not lose hope. Remember that God is sovereign over all things—including the lives of your kids. He loves your kids even more than you do and he knows how their stories will go. Together, let’s make it our mission to pray for the next generation to live full lives of lasting faith and make a big impact in the world for God’s kingdom as they share with others what he has done in their lives  Father God, thank you for the opportunity to raise the child/children you have given me. Thank you for the gift of communicating with you through prayer. I lift up ________ to you and pray that they will live a full life of faith. Lord, in all the ups and downs of their life, may they continue to keep their eyes on you. May they know how much you love them and may they love you back wholeheartedly. Wrap your arms tightly around them all the days of their life. You know ________’s story and I trust you with it. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode was phenomenal! I think it’s my favorite episode since I started with Pardon The Mess and I’m praying this one goes far and wide. I have to shake my head that I get to talk to people that I admire so much. Lee Strobel is a renowned investigative journalist, former atheist, best selling author - who has spent his career diving into evidence that God is real. In this conversation, we chat about the supernatural realm. We dive into demons, angels, deathbed visions and much more. I shared my fear about Satan and my skepticism that rises up in this area. I pray that this meets you in your doubts and questions and will give you some opportunities to chat with your atheist friends about God. I also pray this one ignites your faith in a new way. My favorite part is at the end when we talk about parenting and the supernatural realm. How do we talk about our kids’ doubts and questions about faith? He shares about a nightly rhythm he had with his kids - to give them a regular and safe space to ponder their faith. Enjoy! Courtney  (02:56) Exploring the Supernatural (06:04) Experiences of Miracles and Healing (09:05) The Role of Faith and Skepticism (11:58) Dreams and Encounters with the Divine (14:57) Understanding Demonic Influence (17:11) Demonic Encounters and Exorcisms (20:34) The Tension of Faith and Skepticism (24:24) Navigating the Supernatural in Christianity (28:41) Teaching Kids About the Supernatural Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Lee Strobel The Case for Christ Seeing The Supernatural  Marriage Simplified NIV Application Bible Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Then I heard the Lord asking, ‘Whom should I send as a messenger to this people? Who will go for us?’  I said, ‘Here I am. Send me.’” (Isaiah 6:8 NLT) We don’t know what God will call our kids to do in their lives, but we do know that he won’t call them to sit still. He will not call them to keep the good news to themselves. Whatever their profession looks like, wherever they live, whatever their interests are, or who their friends are, God will call our kids to tell people about Jesus!   We are God’s first plan for spreading the gospel—he relies on his kids to be faithful to their calling to go for him. When God says go, we don’t say no, even when it’s hard or uncomfortable! Since God will call our kids to share their faith, let’s raise them to respond confidently and go boldly into the situation they are called and say, “This is who I was before I met Jesus and this is who I am now.”   This week let’s pray that when God calls our kids, they will go.   Jesus, I pray that ___________ will respond to your call to go and make disciples confidently and boldly. May they tell others about the amazing things you have done in their lives every day. May they be so in awe of your kindness that they can’t help but share your good news. And when they do share about you, Lord, may they do so lovingly and gracefully. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Can you imagine a world where your kids had room to be kids? Where they didn’t hate learning? Where they learned the Bible, core subjects and still had time to play and create and travel? Homeschooling has come so far over the years. As the culture changes and gets further from Jesus and biblical teachings - I think it’s important to pause and just consider if this could be an option for your family.  However, we all carry myths about homeschooling. Whether it’s the idea that they won’t be socialized or that moms can’t have a job outside of this or that we have to be good in all subjects - let’s debunk those together.  I am delighted to learn from Lyndsey Mimnagh with Treehouse Schoolhouse in this episode. She is so passionate about this style of education and helps break down the myths and the realities.  My favorite part is when she shares about the benefits she is seeing in her children and their family culture. Don’t let fear or insecurity talk you out of something God is nudging you to try! Take a listen and pray on the next steps for your children and their schooling. Just one step. Don’t believe the lie that you have to make that decision when they are toddlers and never change course.  Enjoy! Courtney  (03:000 The Joys of Camping and Family Adventures (05:55) The Journey into Homeschooling (08:52) Debunking Myths About Homeschooling (11:56) Socialization in Homeschooling (14:51) The Role of Parents in Homeschooling (17:05) The Joy of Learning at Home (21:30) Balancing Homeschooling and Personal Life (22:48) Creating Resources for Homeschooling (25:01) Rooted in Faith: A Curriculum for Families (27:04) Encouragement for Hesitant Parents (29:10) Navigating Independence in Parenting (31:14) Practical Tips for Daily Life Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Lyndsey at Treehouse Schoolhouse  (CODE: PARDONTHEMESS15 = 15% OFF anything in her store)  Rooted - Family Bible Curriculum  Treehouse Book Club Marriage Simplified Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, ‘Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all’” (Mark 9:35) We all want our kids to be leaders in their communities now and in the future. As followers of Jesus, we are called to see ourselves last instead of first. In fact, the Bible tells us that the first shall be last and the last shall be first. This means we lead not by positioning ourselves well, but by seeing the needs of others and meeting those needs with our giftings and resources.  When we serve and love others in this way, we serve and love God. This week, let’s pray that our kids become humble servant leaders in their communities to make a big impact on God’s kingdom. Let’s pray that they are the first to help when they see others in need and that they reflect Christ’s gentleness, mercy, and willingness to sacrificially serve and share with others. Jesus, help us to lead like you do. May ______________ set aside their desire for power and accolades and serve out of a heart for you and your kingdom. I pray that they continue to make a difference in their community because of the example of service that you give us. May their heart stay humble and focused on you. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you ever heard the term “mental load” as it relates to what we carry as moms? It's the same as carrying every single thing up the stairs as your arms give way to the overload. Our minds do the same. We just snap because our minds aren’t meant to carry so much. So what do we do? How do we keep our care and responsibility high for our kids without drowning? I was delighted to talk about this issue with Emily Jensen, founder of Risen Motherhood. She’s a mom of 5, author, speaker, podcaster and has so much encouragement and practical tips for us. Mother’s Day is this week and I want to challenge us. If you have some expectations or needs for what you need for that day - would you tell your spouse? Or family? Or children? This will help the day to be much smoother!  My favorite part is when she shares about her recent decision to walk away from a big part of her ministry at Risen Motherhood. She put everything before the Lord and asked Him to confirm which things should go in this season. Wow! What a brave thing to do and I can’t wait to see how He honors her with letting go of something so close to her heart. Happy Mother’s Day beautiful moms! You are so loved by God. You are doing a phenomenal job or raising your kids. Giving you a huge Texas hug! Much love, Courtney (02:50) The Mission Behind 'A Million Tiny Moments' (06:04) Understanding the Mental Load in Motherhood (09:05) Strategies to Alleviate the Mental Load (11:54) Long-Term vs. Short-Term Parenting Goals (14:53) Finding Clarity Through Prayer and Decision-Making (16:49) Navigating Life's Seasons (21:27) Alleviating the Mental Load (25:58) Empowering Kids with Responsibility (28:15) Managing Expectations for Mother's Day (32:31) Finding Peace in Motherhood Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Emily Risen Motherhood A Million Tiny Moments - new book by Emily Jensen Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide NIV Application Bible Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8 NLT) How do we reconcile fairness in a world that is unjust and broken? I always tell my kids, fair does not mean equal. We can’t make everything fair in the world because fairness is how we are treated individually and everyone’s wants, situations, and abilities are different. Justice goes deeper than fairness. Justice is about what we deserve and we all deserve the same things.  In the Bible, justice means everyone—the poor, the widows, the orphans, the immigrants, are cared for just like everyone else.  Scripture calls us to care for these people, but that might seem really abstract to kids. So, we can teach our kids that seeking justice means including the kid with learning differences in class projects. Making sure the lonely kid is invited to the party. And it can mean standing up for what is right when someone is being wronged, bullied, or picked on. Actively seeking justice looks like our kids being a peacemaker instead of a peacekeeper and sometimes that is hard! But we are promised that the peacemakers will be called sons and daughters of God!  This week, let’s pray that our kids share God’s heart for others in the way they treat people around them. Let’s pray that our kids’ hearts break for what breaks God’s and that they see injustice in the world and have the courage and faith to stand up to it. God, I pray that _______________ will see what is right, love what is right, and humbly do what is right in your name. In an unjust world, I pray that _____________ will seek justice in all situations. When they see someone being mistreated, give them the courage to step in. When they see the opportunity to help, give them the ability to do so. I pray that as they grow they see injustices beyond their small communities and in the greater world and do what is in their power to right them. Amen. https://churchonthemove.com/pursuing-justice Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

They are back! Sissy Goff and David Thomas are back to equip us with “3 core needs for every kid.” They are always so encouraging and so very practical. The work they have done in their counseling offices has helped thousands of parents just like me. I cling to their perspective and biblical encouragement.  We talk about our kids’ need for resilience, courage and relationship. We also talk about the health benefits for your kids when they have a dog. I couldn't agree more and I was the most anti-dog person in our family until we got our dog. And if you want to go watch this one on YouTube - you’ll see a cute appearance by Sissy’s dog, Patches. My favorite part was when they shared about our kids’ need for connection more than correction. I am so guilty of critiquing my kids and I can see their little faces sink when I do that. This is a huge reminder for us all to fight for connection instead of staying stuck in a loop of critique. What would the little kid in you want from your parents? Let’s stay alert this week and catch ourselves when we lead with criticism.  In this episode, we discuss:  Health benefits of kids having a dogResilience and taking healthy risks How to speak courage into the lives of our kidsHow to prioritize relationships  Enjoy! Courtney  (02:59) Core Needs for Kids: The Importance of Dogs (06:04) The Role of Courage in Child Development (12:01) Healthy Risk Taking in Children (17:59) Building Relationships and Social Skills (23:57) Conclusion and Resources for Parents Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Sissy and David Daystar Counseling  Daystar dogs - new books – Owen Learns He Has What It Takes and Lucy Learns to Be Brave Anxious Generation Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32) Compassion literally means “to suffer together.” It means that we see someone’s pain or needs and we want to help them.  Jesus shows compassion over and over through scripture. We don’t need to be afraid of stepping into someone’s suffering with them. Entering into that does not mean we take on their burdens or pain, it means we offer relief and love in any way we can. But no matter how we can help others or how others can help us, Jesus is always overflowing with compassion and with us in all our sufferings.  This week, let’s pray that our kids share compassion with others. Let’s ask God to give them the eyes to see the needs around them and the compassion to move to action. Jesus, help us to be more and more like you every day. I pray that _____________ grows to be filled with compassion. May their hearts overflow with compassion, just like yours does, when they see needs around them. May they step into the suffering of others knowing that you are there too. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Get ready to laugh! We all need some more Melissa Radkes in our lives. Melissa is not just funny - she’s a mom that is immensely talented. She’s a best-selling author, speaker and television personality. She reminds me of Seinfeld in the ways she observes everyday life and finds the amusement in it all. I don’t know about you, but I need to have moments in my everyday life to simply lighten up and enjoy it. This episode will allow you to pause and enjoy a chat about all things women. She shares the most hysterical stories about growing up in the South while also sharing heartfelt thoughts on her journey as a mom. She is simply delightful!  Don’t miss her heartfelt and honest encouragement about learning to accept who you are. She is at a point in her life where she feels settled in her body and personality. However, there was a season when she prayed to be someone else. I pray that last little bit will encourage you in a deep way. Let the truth of what she says sink into your heart – that the God who created you loves exactly who you are. Much love, Courtney  Chapters (03:01) Navigating Life in Texas (05:51) Graduation and College Preparations (08:56) The Importance of Female Friendships (12:02) The Impact of Women in Our Lives (14:56) Preparing for College Life (17:58) Facing Loneliness in College (18:16) Shared Experiences and Humor in Childhood (20:21) Nostalgic Family Memories and Food Traditions (23:51) The Role of Food in Family Dynamics (26:18) Finding One's Identity and Acceptance (30:01) Embracing Authenticity and Personal Growth (32:53) The Joy of Laughter and Connection Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Melissa Radke  Chicken-Fried Women - Melissa’s new book  Mom’s, Dad’s and Grad’s Gift Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too” (Mark 11:25 NLT) Forgiveness is an art. We coach our kids to forgive others by modeling confession and forgiveness ourselves and by using their sibling conflicts as examples, but it takes a long time and a lot of patience. Few things are as frustrating as one child giving an apathetic, “I’m sorry” paired with an eye roll. But forgiveness is so important because it is one of the main themes of the gospel and it’s such a powerful way to share God’s love and grace with the people around us. Just as Christ forgave us of our sins, we must forgive others! James 2:17 goes so far as to tell us that faith without deeds is dead—meaning faith that does not produce good fruit is not faith at all. So if we claim to follow Jesus, we must follow his example of forgiving others! So it is really important that our kids learn to forgive others well.  God made forgiveness an important command and the cool thing is, he did not do it haphazardly. Forgiving others releases us from grudges and resentment, but forgiveness is also good for your mental and physical health! I love the way God cares for us so intentionally! Luckily, we don’t have to forgive on our own. We can ask God for strength to help us forgive others, the way that he has forgiven us.  This week, let’s pray that our kids will generously forgive others and reconcile broken relationships.  Lord, I pray that ____________sees forgiveness and reconciliation at home and learns to do it well. May they experience a holy unrest when they sin, may they freely confess, and seek to reconcile. When others offend them, may they be quick to forgive and offer mercy. I pray they are a model of forgiveness within their friend groups so that they can show Christ’s example of forgiveness and grace to those around them. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have a tween? This episode is for YOU! Jonathan is one of my very favorite dads on the planet. He’s a pastor, husband, dad of one young adult, 3 teens and a one year old! You’ve heard him on Pardon The Mess before with his beautiful wife Peta Pitts as they have navigated loss together. Alena Pitts is Jonathan’s oldest daughter and someone I admire and respect so much. This father-daughter conversation is incredibly rich and entertaining.  Today’s episode is a very practical one. Alena and Jonathan offer 3 ways we can help our tweens thrive. Alena offers a unique perspective as the oldest child in the family. She looks back at what she appreciated most. Jonathan brings perspective of raising his four daughters while also managing a ministry specifically for tween girls. My favorite part is towards the end when Jonathan encourages us to lay down all the pressures and stuff that is fleeting. How we can continue to prioritize the relationship with our kids over all the things that are fleeting.  In this episode we chat about: Practical ways to help your teens thriveParenting introverted kids vs extrovertedWays to own your role as a parent in their spiritual development Enjoy! Courtney (00:00) Navigating Newlywed Life (03:01) The Joys of Parenting (06:19) The Importance of Family Devotions (09:48) Supporting Tweens in Community (14:43) Building Connections Through Shared Stories (18:16) The Role of Parents in Child Development (20:10) Instilling Truth and Sound Doctrine (25:48) The Importance of Fun and Lightheartedness (32:19) Encouragement for Stressed Parents Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Alena Connect with Jonathan For Girls Like You - magazine and resources for tween girls Jonathan and Peta Pitts episode  Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Enjoy 20% off the For girls Like You Magazine subscription by using code: pardonthemess. Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Jesus said to her, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?’” (John 11:25–26) I cannot imagine a more disheartening period than the time between Good Friday and Easter Sunday. The Jewish people waited so long for a Messiah and Jesus’ disciples found him and followed him! They dropped their entire lives to learn from him and spread his message. And then, in their lack of understanding, they watched him die on the cross and buried him. Can you imagine the defeat? But as Bob Goff says, “Darkness fell, His friends scattered, hope seemed lost - But heaven just started counting to three.” The good news of Easter is that there is life and hope after death!  Just when the disciples surely thought maybe they were wrong or maybe they misunderstood, Jesus rose. Friday and Saturday were hard, but Sunday redeemed it all. We talk about it so often nowadays that sometimes the miracle of it all is lost on us. But let’s not forget: God loved the world so much that even though it was broken, he made a plan to save it by sending his son for us. All we have to do is believe in that and we are saved. It’s the simplest, yet most beautiful message of hope for everyone. If your child has not accepted Jesus as savior, let’s pray for that this week. If they have, let’s pray they deepen their relationship with him and share his good news! So as we prepare for Easter, let’s pray that our kids are people who know and share the good news that when all else seems hopeless, hope lives. Father God, thank you for sending your son to die on the cross for our sin. I pray that ____________ will accept Jesus as their savior and cling to the hope that he provides. May _______________ be a messenger of the good news of the gospel to everyone that they meet. Amen. Why is the gospel good news Why share the good news Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you ever felt like you are too far gone? That some things in your life are too broken for God to fix? In this week’s episode with Meshali - we start out talking ranch and pimento cheese and then dive into the freedom that she has experienced with her painful story and God’s glory. Meshali is a photographer, speaker, author, amazing aunt and friend to many.  Dive in and enjoy a really honest chat about restoration. When you meet Meshali, you might assume she’s always been so lighthearted and delightful and full of smiles and joy. What many don’t know is that this famous photographer has a really hard story. In today’s episode, she gets real and honest about her past - from abuse to a child of divorce to many seasons of depression and insecurity. If we are honest, there are places deep in our heart that we have tucked away assuming they are just too broken. I wanted you to hear from a girl that decided it was time for change. She decided to partner with God on a mission for more. God restored her heart as she restored her 1800s home and together they went room by room to find freedom, healing and joy. My favorite part is when she gives some practical tips for those parents in the midst of divorce. Meshali is incredibly wise and one of the most authentic and hopeful believers I have ever met. I know you will enjoy her as much as I do. I am praying you feel a deep sense of hope and courage as she shares her story. In this episode, we discuss: Unraveling lies and finding freedomHer insight as a child of divorcePractical steps to find restoration and healingPartnering with God in the most painful parts of your story Enjoy! Courtney  (02:59) Food Favorites and Personal Connections (05:59) The Journey of Healing and Restoration (08:57) Childhood and Family Background (12:01) Struggles with Identity and Healing (14:49) The Process of Home Restoration (17:55) Community and Support in Healing (20:26) Unraveling Lies and Finding Freedom (21:31) The Journey of Healing and Restoration (25:30) Experiencing True Joy and Freedom (28:12) The Power of Restoration for Everyone (30:05) Navigating Divorce and Supporting Children (32:23) Practical Steps to Begin Healing (38:44) A Prayer for Restoration and Healing Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Meshali Restored, Partnering with God in Transforming Our Broken Places  - Meshali’s new book (out April 15) Episode with Heather on Healing Prayers Adventure Bible Untriggered Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God” (2 Corinthians 9:11) Jesus gave his life so that we could live ours fully and God wants us to give and give generously and joyfully as a response to that. Generosity is more than giving money, especially for our kids! We can and should give generously with our talents and time as well. It may feel small to help greet people at church, mow a neighbor’s lawn, open up your home to others, or pack shoeboxes at Christmastime, but all those small acts of generous service transform hearts and honor God. As you pray generosity over your kids this week, I encourage you to make a list of the things you and your family can do together to give generously and share the love of Jesus. Maybe it’s a financial goal for a donation, one service project a month, or stepping up to serve at church. Whatever it is that you decide, do so joyfully together.  Remember, the gospel is more about giving than receiving, so let’s pray that our kids’ lives reflect that and that they will learn to love sharing. Lord, we are blessed to be a blessing. I pray that _________ would be known for generosity their entire lives. Whether it is giving financially, giving with time, or giving with talents and resources, I pray that they give cheerfully because of the gift that you give us: the gift of life. As a family, may we be on the lookout for ways we can be generous together. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy April Pardon The Mess Family! Do you have a fellow mom that always calls you higher? I have been friends with Kirsten for over 20 years and she is that kind of mom friend. When we catch up, we get to our priorities fast. And that’s what you hear about today - her priorities and how to make some progress in those. Kirsten is a wife to retired NFL player Benjamin Watson, mom of 7 beautiful children, advocate, speaker, author and dear friend. Benjamin and Kirsten have been on before - you can listen to that episode here.   As you’ll hear today, we talk about what’s most important. Kirsten shares what God is teaching her, how she keeps her marriage a priority and the calling she has as a mom to raise kids that know Jesus.  I absolutely love the end when she shares a few minutes of encouragement and a challenge. Kirsten challenges us to get after tough topics around the table and continue to make our homes a safe place for conversations. Enjoy! Courtney (02:56) Navigating the Challenges of Parenting Teens (06:01) The Emotional Journey of Growing Up (09:03) Trusting God in Parenting Decisions (11:59) The Importance of Confessional Community (17:12) The Power of Shared Burdens (18:00) Embracing Differences in Community (19:33) Prioritizing Marriage Amidst Family Life (24:01) Navigating Kids' Activities and Sports (27:40) Intentional Conversations with Kids (32:00) Practical Tips for Family Meals Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Kirsten Sis Take a Breath - Kirsten’s book   The Watson Seven - Kirsten and Benjamin’s foundation  Adventure Bible Untriggered Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:16) Salt and light are often spoken about together and it seems like an odd pairing, but Jesus shared these two things for a reason! Salt and light give life.  When we pray that our kids are the salt of the earth, we pray that our kids have a faith that is enticing to others and long-lasting. The world will tell our kids that it is better to live a life apart from God, but let’s pray that our kids show those around them that Jesus makes life better!   Jesus wants his followers to make a visible impact on the world around them. We aren’t supposed to hide our faith and joy in the dark, we are supposed to show it off. In a world full of darkness, we should be lights shining Jesus’ love to all around us in words and actions, showing others that he gives life.   This week, let’s pray that our kids have a faith that shines for others, looks desirable to others, and is constant throughout their lives. Dear God, please help _______ be a light each day to those that you have placed in their life. Help them bring light and joy to dark places. Help them to reflect you in all they do and be a shining example of you. Please give them opportunities to be your salt and light so that more can come to know you. Amen.  Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

From the reality TV show “Married to Jonas” to becoming a mom to postpartum to a viral blog and recently a cancer journey - Dina’s story reminds us all that God will never leave us. I’m so thankful I had the chance to get to know Dina and her incredible story. She feels like a mom I would meet at the park and then I’d want to sit for hours and laugh and cry. Dina is the REAL deal!  Although, I booked her on this podcast to chat about cooking and the power of family dinner - God took us on a turn. Dina is so open in our chat about her postpartum days, her cancer journey and career ups and downs. I believe many of you will relate to her journey and be inspired by her authentic quest to glorify God no matter the season of life. I loved hearing about the days of cooking on TV (Hallmark, The Today Show, GMA, Rachel Ray and more). I’ve always wondered how they pull off a meal in 3 minutes.  In this episode, we chat about: Dina’s postpartum and honesty about motherhood What she learned about God through her cancer journeyFrom cooking in a dorm to cooking on national television Enjoy! Courtney  (03:02) Dina's Journey: From Cooking to Counseling (05:58) Navigating Life's Seasons and Faith (08:56) Health Challenges and Personal Growth (12:02) The Impact of Motherhood on Identity (15:04) Overcoming Postpartum Depression (18:08) Finding Support and Community (19:35) Navigating Mental Health and Support (22:40) Sharing Personal Journeys and Faith (30:01) Practical Cooking Tips for Busy Moms (35:44) The Importance of Family Meals and Connection Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: At the Kitchen Sink - Dina’s new book  A Million Tiny Moments http://adventurebible.com Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Jesus called out to them, ‘Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!’” (Matthew 4:19 NLT) When Jesus tells his future disciples that he will make them fishers of men, I don’t think he was envisioning them sitting in a boat waiting for bites. To be a successful fisherman, you have to go where the fish are hungry and cast your net (or your line).  Jesus planned to use his disciples to draw people to him. He needed them to go to where the people were hungry for hope and share his message! We can do this today and so can our kids. As believers, we need to meet people where they are.  There are times when we will witness to others and see great success immediately. Other times we will witness for a very long time and see very little fruit. There may be people that we pray for for a long time before we see God move in their lives (maybe that’s even our kids)! But God’s calling is to continue to cast our nets and share his good news, even if we don’t catch anything. So this week, let’s pray that our kids will take an active part in sharing the hope of Jesus, casting their nets far and wide to draw people closer to their Savior. Jesus, you call us to be fishers of men. I pray that _______________ would see the people around them and meet them where they are to share your good news. May they never be ashamed of the gospel, but be ready to share it far and wide. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It’s not everyday you get to interview someone that disconnected in an extreme way. Carlos Whittaker wanted to really test his attachment to his phone and learn from the power disconnecting. So he went to live in an Amish community, in a monastery, and then did life at home without a device. His lessons are so powerful about how to reconnect with the ones we love most. When we recorded this episode, Carlos had just recently lost his father and was about to speak at his funeral. Many people have grown to love him on Carlos’ instagram account, and I have been so moved by the way Carlos cared for him through his final days. You won’t want to miss the parenting lesson he shares about his amazing father. I’d love to challenge us today. Let’s practically think through our daily lives and how we can disconnect regularly so that we connect more intentionally with each child. Carlos offers several practical ideas on how to do that - even if your job requires you to be online. In this episode, we discuss: How connection matters with our kidsHow to disconnect from devices and whyHow to connect with teens and their interests Enjoy! Courtney    Chapters (00:00) Navigating Parenting Challenges (02:54) Caring for Aging Parents (05:58) A Life-Changing Call (08:58) The Journey to Reconnection (11:55) Transformative Family Time (15:00) Balancing Work and Life (17:46) Detoxing from Digital Dependency (20:09) Balancing Online Sharing and Family Life (22:37) Curiosity as a Path to Empathy (26:45) Connecting with Teens through Shared Interests Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with CarlosCarlos’ Podcast - Human SchoolCarlos’ latest book - ReconnectedA Million Tiny Moments Dead Sea SquirrelsChristian Parenting Easter bundle Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6–7) The Greek word for anxiety means “cut up into pieces.” So when we feel anxious we feel cut up or divided, and if you’ve ever struggled with anxiety, it can really feel like that! But Jesus wants us to bring him our cut-up pieces because his peace can make us whole. In fact, the Greek word for peace means “wholeness.” So this verse literally says God wants us to bring our divided hearts to him so he can make them whole.   So many of our kids struggle with anxiety and so many of us do as well. None of us want to see our kids hurt as they fight this battle. Anxiety and worry are challenging roads, but we can encourage our kids that we follow the God who made the whole universe. He cares for them, hears them, and wants to ease their burdens. This week, let’s pray that they cast their fears and anxiety onto the Lord so that they can feel his rest because his yoke is easy and his burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).   Lord, I pray that ________________ brings their divided heart to you. I pray against the anxiety that is so prevalent today. Whatever it is that ___________ feels cut up about, may they present their requests to you, and may your wholeness guard their heart and mind. Please give them the peace that passes all understanding. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Grace Valentine is BACK! You all absolutely loved the first episode and you will love this one even more. Grace is a firecracker for Jesus. That’s what a grandma would say - but it’s so true. She comes in with such energy and truth that will just fire you up. She is a speaker, author and podcast host and is impacting thousands of young women around the world. On today’s episode we talk about all things FRIENDS. Friendships are just hard, not just for young girls for us as women. Grace has bible-based true encouragement for how to make and maintain friends. JOURNAL alert! You will need to take notes for this one. She just casually tosses out profound statements at the speed of lightning. So, buckle in. My favorite part is when she compared homecoming to the Met Gala. I still laugh out loud when I think about it. She quickly pivots from that joke to the sting of rejection. She also asks amazing questions: will that rejection taint your view or make you wiser and kinder? Or will it make you bitter?  In this episode, we chat about:  Understanding shallow vs deep friendshipsHow to humble yourself in conflictChallenges of making and keeping friends Enjoy! Courtney DeFeo  (02:58) Navigating College and Post-Grad Life (05:53) Friendship Journeys and Challenges (09:00) The Complexity of Friendships (12:00) Understanding Shallow vs. Deep Friendships (15:02) Finding Your Community and Dance Floor (16:29) Navigating Loneliness and Friendship (20:45) Conflict Resolution in Friendships (28:08) The Importance of Authentic Connections Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Grace ValentineThe Better Friend - Grace’s new bookA Million Tiny MomentsSky Ranch Camps Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Depending on how old your kids are, the idea of praying for their future spouse and family may feel like a stretch. But even if your child is currently toddling around your house playing with blocks and eating cheerios, it’s never too early to start praying for their future family. Maybe it’s easier to imagine if your kids are older, but at some point in the future, your child will more than likely go and create their own family to lead. As believing parents, we all desire our kids to lead their future families in the way of the Lord. If marriage is God’s will for your child, someday your child’s spouse will be the most important person in their life. He or she will know them the absolute best and be their partner in faith and life. Together they will, God-willing, raise beautiful children who know, love, follow, and share Jesus.  We can pray that our child will find a spouse who loves Jesus, family, the church, and be a supportive partner through the ups and downs of life. We can pray that any future grandkids will grow to love Jesus and continue on a legacy of faith. In the grand scheme of life, we only have our kids in our homes for a little while. As their parents, we have an amazing opportunity to pray for their future family starting now! This week, let’s pray that our kids will continue to pass along a legacy of faith in their future families and homes. Jesus, you know our past and you know our future. Today, I pray for ____'s future. If your plan for them is singleness, I pray that you will surround them with a wonderful community of friends and family and that you will always be their rock, fortress, and best friend. If your plan for them is marriage, I pray that they will find a spouse who loves you with all their heart and has a desire to raise up children who love and follow you. Thank you for the gift of family and the ability to watch my children grow into the adults you created them to be. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you spend time overthinking? I sure do, but can honestly say it’s gotten way better over the years. This episode is dedicated to my small group of senior girls. They were telling me that “overthinking” is taking them down for so many days. That conversation had me pondering about the topic and I wanted to help them with this struggle. So, I got Jon Acuff back on the podcast to help me wrestle through it. Jon Acuff writes the most relatable books with common struggles in our daily lives. He’s an entrepreneur, author, speaker, podcaster, husband and dad of 2 college girls. He’s also hilarious and always has me laughing every time we connect. My favorite part is how he gives us a very practical way to approach overthinking. Instead of letting this steal our time, creativity and productivity - what if we were deliberate with what we think about? Could we use that same time and energy to fight for positive thoughts over negative thoughts? He offered a code for his upcoming event  In this episode, we chat about: How overthinking affects almost everyoneHow to switch overthinking to something positive How to shorten the pity parties in our minds Enjoy! Courtney  (03:08) The College Experience and Loneliness Epidemic (05:59) Overthinking: A Common Human Experience (08:55) The Dangers of Overthinking (11:56) Soundtracks: Shifting Negative Thoughts (15:07) Faith and Practicality in Overthinking (18:09) Navigating Teenage Emotions and Relationships (20:05) Understanding Teenagers: Insights from Parenting (22:10) Navigating the Empty Nest: Emotions and Realities (24:12) The Challenges of Parenting Adult Children (28:40) Creating a Remarkable Life: Upcoming Event Insights Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: A Million Tiny Moments The Unbreakable Boy movie Connect with Jon Acuff Remarkable You - upcoming event with Jon Acuff (code: PODCAST50) Soundtracks book Your New Playlist book for teens  How Teens Win book for teens Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect” (Romans 12:2 NLT) On top of these difficult conversations, our kids are growing up in a world that increasingly values individual truth over God’s truth; a world where everyone is encouraged to “live their truth.” But, the Bible tells the story of God’s plan for his people; and as believers, we should use it to shape the way we see and interact with the world. That will often look different than other people around us.  These changes in our world can make us feel really unprepared and afraid of the future. But, remember we serve a sovereign God who is always in control! He loves our kids even more than we do. We are not powerless as parents—we have the Holy Spirit in us. We can ask him to prompt our kids' hearts and we can commit to praying for them to treasure the Bible and find a true worldview and identity in Christ! This week, let’s pray that our kids live out a biblical worldview. In other words, let’s ask God to help them know the gospel, love the gospel, and that their lives would be completely changed by it! Dear God, help my child to hate sin and live a life of standing out and following you. Help them to find out what pleases you (Ephesians 5:10) and commit to following you wholeheartedly. Help them to love your word, hide your word in their heart, and let your word shape the way they live. Amen. Sadie Robertson Huff’s message on “your truth.”Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you know that Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network? There are 29 podcasts for Christian parents within our network. Our guest today, Jessica Hurlbut, is the co-host of the popular Full Spectrum Parents podcast, a faith-based podcast for parents who are raising kids with autism. I learned so much from Jessica today and I know you will too. Whether you are raising a child with autism, down syndrome, learning disability or any other special needs diagnosis - you will be so encouraged by her story.   Greg and Jessica Hurlbut are parents of five children: two autistic, two adopted, and one future president. Their heartfelt desire is to serve special needs families each week with a dose of help, a dose of humor, and a dose of hope.  My favorite part is at the end when she encourages parents with a new diagnosis. As I think about what my sister has walked through with her son - I know she would echo what Jessica is sharing. She shares that all kids are a gift and that the pain and shock of the new diagnosis doesn’t last forever.  In this episode, we chat about: How autism killed her perfectionismPublic perception of families with special needs (how to judge less)What all children want - no matter how their brain worksEncouragement for parents with a new diagnosis Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters: (03:01) Life in Upstate New York (05:58) Family Dynamics and Motherhood Journey (09:03) Navigating Autism and Special Needs (11:59) Faith and Challenges in Parenting (14:59) The Role of Humor and Perspective in Parenting (18:14) The Journey of Seeking Solutions for Autism (20:11) A Shift in Perspective: From Fixing to Loving (22:34) Embracing Humility and the Gift of Children (24:46) Navigating Public Perception and Judgment (25:27) The Impact of Media on Parental Healing (28:15) Fostering Empathy in Children (30:18) The Importance of Compassion and Understanding (34:27) Words of Encouragement for New Parents (36:15) Finding Strength in God During Difficult Times Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: The Unbreakable Boy movie Connect with Jessica Full Spectrum Parents Podcast Unlimited Motherhood - Jessica’s book Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking” (James 1:5 NLT) The Bible tells us that God is generous in sharing his wisdom with us—all we have to do is ask for it. Even more, he won’t rebuke us or be disappointed in us when we ask for his wisdom, he wants to give it to us! (James 1:5). We should never be embarrassed to ask God for help or instructions! As Christians, we get to lean on the Holy Spirit and apply his wisdom to every area of our lives from how to treat people, how to spend our time, what activities to participate in, what movies to watch, what relationships to pursue, and how to best use our finances. God cares about every part of our lives and will give us the wisdom to navigate it all in a way that honors him.  This week, let's ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom on how to best pray for our kids as they follow God. As our kids see us asking for wisdom, they will learn to do the same! Let's pray that our kids will seek God's wisdom through prayer, other discerning believers, and scripture. Lord, I pray that _________ would be quick to turn to you for wisdom whenever they need to make a decision, need comfort, or feel confused. In every area of their lives, I pray they depend on you. May they develop a hunger for wisdom and insight from you. May they always have the humility to know that your ways are better than their ways and that you want them to ask for help and guidance. Amen.  Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have daughters? Do you have some mom wounds? Are you facing some “mean girl” moments as you raise your daughters? Then, you cannot miss this one. I’m always amazed at the way Melanie Shankle cuts through the clutter of life and gets to the core of the issue. She’s one of my very favorite moms out there - I have always read her books, learned from her journey, admired her faith and soaked up her wisdom.  It can be really tricky to walk through your own junk and past while raising your own kids. She gives very specific ways we can face our own struggles during your years as a mom. I am praying Melanie’s courage rubs off on all of us and we face some of our hardest moments and gain strength through that process. My favorite part is when Melanie talks about what she needed from her mom including stability and an environment where she could be herself. This really motivated me to think about how often I critique and pick at my girls. They need a home where they can be themselves without changing anything about them.  In this episode, we discuss: How to recognize mean girl behaviorWhen to step in when your girl is being bulliedHow to heal from past wounds as a mom Parenting differently than your own mom  Praying for you all as you process through your mom wounds and mean girl moments. God will meet you there! Let him heal the hurting places of your heart. Much love, Courtney  (00:00) Puppy Love and Life with Dogs (06:00) Hard No's: Navigating Everyday Annoyances (12:01) Skincare Secrets: Affordable Beauty Tips (17:55) Mean Girls: Navigating Childhood Friendships (23:28) The Importance of Emotional Safety (29:35) Healing from Past Wounds (37:32) The Struggle as a Path to Strength Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: The Unbreakable Boy movie Connect with Melanie Here Be Dragons - Melanie’s new book American Eagle - sweat pant Eminence Vitamin C  Extreme cream Elastic skin Melanie’s Amazon Shop Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline, and do not resent his rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in” (Proverbs 3:11–12) Because we love our kids and want what’s best for them, we want them to grow up to be well-rounded, healthy, successful, godly people, so we establish boundaries in their lives and we reinforce them when they are broken. We explain why certain rules exist and how to act in social situations. We correct. We talk. We talk some more. We lose our cool. We say sorry. We hug. We discipline our kids.  Because the Lord loves us and wants what’s best for us, he is constantly changing us and conforming us into the image of Christ through spiritual discipline because he wants us to become more and more like Jesus. God’s discipline is not meant to hurt us, it is never out of anger, and it’s not about perfect behavior; it is to protect us and grow our relationship with him. The Lord’s discipline is not to punish us, it is to transform us. Understanding this requires spiritual maturity in our kids that they will gain as they follow Jesus through their lives. So let’s pray that our kids will grow to see that God’s discipline in their lives is a wonderful part of following him—it means he is taking an active part in growing them to be more and more like him for his good purpose. Father God, you are a good father who loves your children. Thank you for calling ________ your child. Help them to see you as a father who disciplines out of love and care, not out of anger and rules.  You want what's best for your kids and you know how much sin hurts us, help them to experience the peace that comes from confession and forgiveness! Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Raise your hands if you are excited about talking with your teen about sexual integrity? Not me. These are hard, but necessary conversations we must have with our kids. I have the very best voices in this area, Jim Burns and Erin Mashaw, on the podcast today. In this episode, we discuss the complexities of parenting, particularly in relation to sexuality and communication. We talk about the importance of early education on sexual integrity, the challenges posed by the purity culture and the need for open dialogue between parents and children.  The bottom line is our kids need a healthy and safe place to talk about their sexuality. As a parent, that can feel very scary. You will love these two and want to pick up their newest book - that gives you and your teen some language that will help. Our kids are all curious about sexuality and bombarded with messages that are far from biblical truth. Erin and Jim approach a tough topic with such love and grace.  In this episode, we chat about: How to start conversations about sexuality early How purity culture created shame around sexualityUnderstanding curiosity and boundaries How to encourage dating in a way that fosters healthy relationships Enjoy! Courtney 00:00 Introduction to Parenting Challenges 05:58 The Importance of Early Education 12:05 The Scope of the New Book 17:45 Navigating Honesty in Parenting 23:43 Embracing Differences in Family Dynamics 30:10 The Long Game of Parenting Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: The Unbreakable Boy movie Jim’s Organization - HomeWord Connect with Jim Connect with Erin A Student’s Guide To Sexual Integrity -Erin and Jim’s new book Doing Life With Your Adult Children with Jim Burns Affresh for your laundry Courtney’s Amazon List Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another” (1 Peter 4:10 NLT) One of our strong desires as parents is for our kids to find a place of belonging in the world. We want our kids to know that who they are and what they have to offer is important and valuable, and spiritual gifts are one of the ways God empowers us to find belonging and purpose in the world. Helping our kids discover and use their spiritual gifts well will help them see the bigger picture of how they fit into God’s kingdom.  God made each and every one of our kids uniquely and he gave them all spiritual gifts. Some of these gifts are: teaching, serving, administration, hospitality, mercy, prayer, and more. Spiritual gifts are meant to be used to bring glory to God and using them becomes a testimony of how he has worked in our lives.  This week let’s pray that as our kids follow the Lord, they discover their spiritual gifts, grow into them, and that they are presented with opportunities to use them to serve God’s kingdom. Let’s also ask God to help us recognize spiritual gifts in our kids and to share what we see with them.  Dear God, thank you for the spiritual gifts that you have given ________________. Please reveal to me and to them what those gifts are and show us how you want to use these gifts to encourage others and bring others to Christ. Help them to start to see your purpose for them and to boldly use their gifts to please you! I know you will use them in mighty and awesome ways! Remind my child to value the gifts that you have given them over the things that this world values. Spiritual Gifts test mentioned in episode: https://www.lifeway.com/en/articles/women-leadership-spiritual-gifts-growth-service Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week’s episode is packed with insights and practical advice for navigating the complexities of parenting during the middle school years. I’m joined by Steph Thurling, and together we dive into balancing love, independence, and the continuous learning process of parenting. Here are four key takeaways from this episode: Parenting evolves as children grow, and middle school years often require creative ways to re-engage with your kids.  Allowing children to experience failure helps them develop responsibility and confidence.  Overparenting can hinder independence—parents should guide their children through problems, not shield them from them.  Self-care for parents is crucial to maintaining balance and avoiding guilt in the parenting journey.   Steph Thurling is the executive director of Christian Parenting and the host of the Christian Parenting podcast where she encourages parents every week to be the imperfectly perfect parent God created them to be. She is also an author, speaker, and advocate for empowering parents to create lasting family connections.  I love working alongside Steph at Christian Parenting. She’s a delight and filled with wisdom and encouragement.  Enjoy! Courtney  (01:57) Navigating Parenting Stages (06:10) Engaging with Middle Schoolers (10:07) The Balance of Hovering and Letting Go (13:57) Preparing for Independence (18:02) Overparenting: Understanding the Roots (21:06) Navigating the Challenges of Letting Go in Parenting (24:35) The Importance of Self-Care and Mom Guilt (26:54) Recognizing Red Flags in Parenting Dynamics (28:54) Practical Strategies to Avoid Over-Parenting (31:37) Embracing Independence and Building Confidence in Kids (34:49) The Balance of Love and Guidance in Parenting Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Christian Parenting Podcast Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9) Confession is not something that we are typically very comfortable with. No one likes to admit when they do something wrong, especially when it’s something hurtful or will cause someone to feel disappointed in them. Confessing is vulnerable, it’s revealing, and sometimes it’s just downright embarrassing. But like it or not, confession is part of following Jesus. But when we bring our sins to God we can be assured that he will forgive us. He will make our transgressions as far from us as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). God wants to forgive us! In his steadfast love and compassion, Jesus forgives our sins and forgets our transgressions when we confess them. When we start to feel ashamed or guilty, we can remind ourselves that Christ died for that sin too. There is nothing we can do or say that will make God love us less or love us more. He just simply loves us! Accepting forgiveness requires action from us, though. First, we must confess and then turn from our sin. In John 8, Jesus forgives the woman who was committing adultery, but as he forgives her, he tells her to, “go and sin no more,” (verse 11). Second, we must forgive others. God expects his followers to forgive each other just as he forgave them (Ephesians 4:32). Confessing our sins is our get-to and should be a regular part of our faith! There is freedom that can be found in confessing our sins regularly, so let’s pray that our kids experience that freedom and experience a desire to confess to God. Father God, you are faithful to forgive our sins. I pray that __________ would understand the gift of confession and forgiveness. May your Holy Spirit stir up in them a heart to know you better, a spirit of conviction, and a desire to make things right with you. May ________ always remember that there is no condemnation for those who believe, but in you there is freedom. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my church and pastor? Ron and I feel really grateful that we found a home at Compass Church. Drew Sherman (lead pastor at Compass) and his amazing wife Michelle are on the podcast today.  It all started with a sermon that he preached at the beginning of the year that was SO GOOD! Even Larson remarked that it was her favorite sermon he has ever done. We are talking about the idea or the issue of: CONSISTENCY. And more specifically, how can we be consistent in our spiritual growth (for us and the kids). It’s so easy to have huge dreams and ideas at the start of a year only to find yourself failing again and tossing your hands up. From physical goals to reading goals to financial goals - staying consistent can be the hardest part. The same is true for our spiritual goals as a family. Drew and Michelle share 4 very practical ways we can all grow in our consistency. When he talks he gives us a sincere caution: as a pastor, he is often seeing parents with seriously high (unrealistic) goals for their kids. Don’t miss his encouragement and warning about exhausting our kids and being fixated on goals that don’t matter as much as their walk with Jesus. As he says, “Don't miss the ride and the journey!” In this episode, we chat about: Why “consistency” matters for our spiritual growthEmbracing small steps that will lead to lasting change How to model faith and values in our homesHow a grace-filled environment allows for mistakes Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Connection 05:03 The Importance of Declaring Intentions 10:01 Consistency as a Catalyst for Change 14:58 Starting Small in Spiritual Growth 20:04 Overcoming the Urge to Give Up 27:29 Navigating Distractions in Modern Parenting 35:12 Cherishing Small Moments in Family Life Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Compass Church Drew’s sermon on CONSISTENCY Landon’s sermon on RESPONSIBILITY (mentions manifesting) Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be” (Matthew 6:21 NLT) Most of us make it a priority to teach our little kids the difference between wants and needs.  “No, you don’t need a new Lego set, you want a new Lego set.” “I know you don’t want to help clean the house, but you need to.” Owning things and wanting things is not a bad thing in itself. What is bad is putting those things before following God. Jesus tells us very clearly that we cannot serve two Gods, meaning we cannot serve both God and money (Matthew 6:24). Instead of focusing our minds and hearts on all the things that money can buy, we are to focus our minds and hearts on the greatest gift that money cannot buy: Jesus and his kingdom. This is so hard in our current influencer society, where you can't use your phone without feeling like you need to buy something or compare yourself to someone else, and it starts young! This week let’s pray that our kids focus their hearts on things that are eternal instead of temporary. Let’s pray that they follow God by putting their energy into what God has for them instead of what the world tells them will make them happy and fulfilled. Father God, you gave us everything when you gave us the gift of salvation through Jesus. I pray for ___________________. I pray that they store up treasures in heaven, that they fix their eyes on the unseen things that honor and bring glory to you Lord, not on the things of this earth. When they are tempted to idolize material things, give them the strength to see past the temptation and recenter themselves on the things that matter most. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you raising athletes? Are you struggling with how to best support them? Are you thinking about how their faith impacts their sport - or informs their sport? We have two experts today on the podcast, Elisabeth and Sarah Hasselbeck - both are wives of former NFL players and moms of D1 athletes.  Listen to this episode with the entire family. Maybe sports is a place of disagreement in your family and this could open up some healthy dialogue with your spouse and children. Sarah and Elisabeth share such practical tips for you as you parent your athletes. Don’t miss the end when both Sarah and Elisabeth share about the bigger picture of parenting. They take a moment to give heartfelt wisdom and encouragement for all parents (not just those with athletes)! I am so thankful for these two ladies and the legacy of faith their family is leaving in the sports community.  In this episode, we discuss: The Hasselbeck family and their history of sports and faith Parental involvement in sports How to make faith the highest priority in your homeHow to help your athletes face setbacks and disappointments  I have a feeling this will be one of your favorite episodes of the year. Much love, Courtney (Former mediocre dancer who wanted to be a Rockette or Janet Jackson)   (02:55) The Hasselbeck Dynasty: Sports and Faith (05:53) Navigating Parental Involvement in Sports (08:57) Lessons from Competitive Parenting (11:58) Managing Expectations and Financial Burdens in Sports (19:00) Navigating Sports and Family Commitments (20:07) Faith and Sports: A Family Perspective (23:04) The Role of Identity in Sports (26:01) Encouragement for Moms in Sports (27:50) Trusting God's Plan for Our Kids (32:00) The Importance of Great Coaching Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Elisabeth Elisabeth’s newest book - God’s Masterpiece Connect with Sarah  Annabelle Hasselbeck’s Podcast - What’s Up Family Meeting Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it’” (Matthew 16:24–25) Denying ourselves might involve taking an inventory of those things we hold more important than God. This might mean choosing between two good things, doing something we don’t really want to do, or giving something up. Mostly, denying ourselves means leaving behind a sinful life and walking with Jesus every day. This doesn’t always sound appealing, especially to a kid. But Jesus promises us that when we surrender our lives over to him, he will give us life and life to the full (John 10:10). This is the slow process of sanctification—or being made holy. We can’t do it ourselves, we need Jesus. So while our kids may naturally think of themselves first (let’s be real, we often do too), the truth is, there is something bigger than our kids that is worth following, and that is Jesus. So this week, let’s pray that as our kids grow, they learn to deny themselves and their earthly desires and choose to follow Jesus. Jesus, you are the king of our hearts and lives. I pray that ______________ chooses to be your disciple and that they always know that the world is not about them and there is freedom in that, release them from the pressure of that. May they evaluate their focus and, with your help and strength, be sanctified to you as they deny themselves, turn from sin, and follow you. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I took a break from social media in December, and I could not believe the difference in my mood and clarity. This episode is not here to guilt us as parents - but to equip us! My guest, Niro Feliciano, is a psychotherapist, mom of four kids and regular contributor on The Today Show. She speaks in a language we can understand. She shares about brain science and how the dopamine high/low pattern is really impacting the moods and wellbeing of our children (and us).  I saw Niro’s reel on the “dopamine deficit” weeks ago and reached out to her immediately to continue that conversation on this podcast. Her reel is one that you can share with your teens. If you are seeing signs of depression and anxiety in your teens - do not miss this episode. My favorite part is when she gives grace at the end. Don’t go straight to condemnation of your parenting. If you feel you have failed your kids with technology. It’s not too late to make changes and help them through the reality of living in a digital world. Who is ready to try a quick 24-hour or weekend reset and report back? Enjoy! Courtney 00:00 Weather and Family Updates 06:01 Navigating Parenting Teens 12:02 Understanding Dopamine Deficit 18:01 Recognizing Symptoms of Dopamine Deficit 23:42 Understanding Temperament and Personality Types 30:24 Embracing Parental Imperfection and Growth Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Niro This Book Won’t Make You Happy - Niro’s book on contentment  All Is Calmish - Niro’s newest book (pre-order available) Niro’s instagram reel on Dopamine - show your kids!! Niro’s January segment on The Today Show - Grace! The Anxious Generation Dopamine Nation  Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me—just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep” (John 10:14–15) Throughout scripture, Jesus is referred to not just as a good shepherd, but as the good shepherd. On top of all the things mentioned above, Jesus would and will lay down his life for his sheep. Not only that, but the good shepherd cares so deeply for every single sheep that he will leave the 99 to chase down one. In Luke 15, a shepherd leaves his entire flock to find one lost sheep, and when he does, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and calls all his neighbors together to have a party for his lost sheep who is now found (verses 5–6). Jesus laid down his life for your kids. Jesus loves your kids so much that if they stray, he will not forget about them. They may seem lost to you, but they are not lost to Jesus. When they decide to return, he will rejoice over them and there will be a party in heaven!  Let’s pray our kids will surrender their lives to Jesus, follow the good shepherd always, and trust his care over their lives. Lord, you are the good shepherd. I pray that ______________ puts their trust in you and decides to follow you. May they always know that they can run to you when they are afraid, overwhelmed, or don’t know what to do. And may they always know that if they stray, you will be waiting for their joyful return! Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This summer, I ran into a Pardon the Mess listener and asked her how I could support her parenting journey on this podcast. She said, “All of my friends talk about health and hormones every day. It’s a real struggle.” I did not disagree. Maybe it’s middle age or the fact that we have TONS of information overwhelming us on social media - but the topic of women’s health is often overwhelming. For many years, I have run on empty and taking care of myself last. Anyone else relate to this approach?  Today’s conversation with Dr. Edie Wadsworth won’t solve everything - but will hopefully encourage you as you navigate your health journey. I believe the health of us as parents greatly impacts how we show up with our kids. It’s inevitable to feel exhausted as parents - but imagine if you didn’t. I have never really understood insulin resistance until this conversation.  My favorite part is at the end when she reminds ME and all of us - that our value isn’t tied to our weight. I also love how she encouraged us all to not give up and keep taking small steps. In our chat we discuss: Dr. Edie’s journey as a physician battling her own health strugglesHow can we understand our hormones as we ageWhat can we do to make some progress when we feel stuckHolistic and affordable ideas when we don't want another prescription  Enjoy! Courtney The information provided in this podcast episode is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with your healthcare professional regarding your health concerns, medical conditions, or treatment options. (02:55) Family Dynamics and Life in Tennessee (05:51) Health Journey and Transition from Medicine (08:59) Understanding Perimenopause and Hormonal Changes (12:01) The Importance of Holistic Health Practices (14:57) Nutrition and Hormonal Balance (17:55) Building Muscle and Managing Insulin Resistance (21:05) Creating Health vs. Managing Sickness (24:10) Understanding Menopause and Perimenopause (26:04) The Power of Self-Advocacy in Health (29:54) Navigating Hormonal Health and Finding the Right Doctor (31:42) The Role of Supplements and Hormone Replacement Therapy (33:53) Addressing Joint Health and Insulin Resistance (36:50) Overcoming Overwhelm and Building Healthy Habits (41:31) Resources for Health and Wellness (45:48) Embracing Worth Beyond Weight Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Connect with Edie Edie’s Podcast Life Mentoring School Conversation with Ruth Soukup about weight loss The Body Keeps Score Young Living  Why We Get Sick The Obesity Code Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:3–4) We have probably all been hurt by trusting someone or something too much. As believing parents, we know that there is something better for our kids when they put their trust in Jesus. Trusting Jesus means surrendering every part of our stories to him and knowing that his plans are good. Even if he feels far away at times, he cares for us and will provide for our needs because the world may under-deliver, but Jesus never breaks a promise. This means when our kids trust Jesus: They don’t need to be afraid when they are put in an unknown situation or life feels uncertain because Jesus always wins. They can feel confident that Jesus will protect them when they are facing something difficult because God answers his children when they call on him.They are God’s child, no matter how others treat them.They can have hope even in hopeless situations because Jesus has already overcome the world!Their lives will be blessed. This week, let’s pray that our kids fully love God by trusting in Jesus and begin to experience his great promises. God, I pray that ___________ learns to trust in you and your promises. When they are tempted to believe the promises of the world, may their heart be reminded that you will never forsake them. May they consistently see the sweet fruit that comes from trusting in you with their lives and with their stories. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy New Year!!! I cannot believe it’s 2025. I've been thinking about this year for a long time because it’s the year my first child graduates from high school. Well, that went fast! Today’s episode is a special one for me, but also insanely practical for all of us. We have my brother, Drew McClure, on the show today to talk about “parent burnout.” Is it just the life of a mother to feel utterly exhausted all the days of our lives? Is there a way to have more energy? Better energy? Focused energy? Meaningful energy?  He talks us through how to make some traction this year so we don’t burnout early in the year. His thoughts are wise and sustainable and tested. As the Founder of People Profit, his job is to coach companies to eliminate burnout and increase capacity. He has a deep passion for humans and how we work. So, let’s get his take on the performance of a parent!   Drew encourages us to start with one thing. Just one thing. You may want a journal or pad of paper as you listen to this one. It’s FULL of helpful tips to write down. My favorite moment is in the beginning when he tells his story from going to a wild middle schooler to walking with great friends that love Jesus. It’s a powerful example of how God can step in and speak to the heart of our kids. And that even the BEST parents (mine) cannot control outside influences and your children’s decision. But God. He can work it all for good. Enjoy! Courtney Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:33) As we inch towards a new year, many of us are considering our goals and priorities. Some of us are coming up with our word of the year. That seemed to be the trend that started a few years back—pick one word to focus on for the entire year. I’ve heard people choose words like love, intentional, joy, courage, prayerful. But what if our word was simply, God? What would our year look like if we chose to focus on God before everything else? This week, let’s pray that our kids will love God with their whole hearts and make seeking him their first priority every day this coming year and every year.  Father God, I pray that ______________ would choose you this year. Give _________ an undivided heart and teach them your ways. I pray they would wake up every day and decide that honoring you and deepening their relationship with you would be their first priority. When it is tempting to choose something else over you, remind them that you are the same yesterday, today, and forever and that you want their whole heart. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Merry Christmas friends!!!! I wanted to end the year with some heartfelt encouragement to each of you. Try to get away from all the noise and distractions when you listen to this one. Sit with your eyes closed or go on a walk - and pray God would encourage your anxious and weary heart. It’s so easy to get to the end of a year and only think about the few things you didn’t do right or mistakes that were made. I want to remind you of the MANY things you are doing well for your children. God sees them.  I share a few letters from YOU - words you wrote to your younger self. And then I read my own letter and it was so powerful for me to do that. Try to get some time to write your own letter to the younger version of you. What did you need to hear as a young mom? And then let’s receive that same tenderness and grace and love for the mom that we are right now.  I am so thankful for our community. Let’s keep showing up for these kids and loving God in the new year ahead. You are so very loved and you are such a great mom. Merry Christmas, Courtney Chapters 00:00 Reflecting on Motherhood: A Year-End Pause 06:04 Wisdom from Friends: Insights on Parenting 11:46 Embracing Imperfection in Parenting 18:10 Looking Forward: A Message of Hope Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6 ESV) It’s easy to get caught up in the to-dos and materialism of Christmas. There are so many activities and so many gifts to purchase. And while giving and receiving gifts is exciting, the greatest gift we can ever receive came as a tiny newborn baby in a lowly manger all those years ago. It’s up to us to receive this gift! So we can always be praying that our kids will accept God’s gift, believe in him, and love him all the days of their lives. The book of Luke tells us that when Jesus was born, shepherds worshiped and spread the word, angels sang, and Mary treasured all those moments up in her heart and pondered them (Luke 2:19). As we approach Christmas day, let’s focus our attention on those same acts. As a family let’s worship the Lord, spread his good news, sing songs of adoration and celebration, and let’s store up the memories and meaning in our hearts so that we can remember God’s great gift to us all year long. This week, let’s pray that our kids grow to know and love the true meaning of Christmas and that they would focus less on consumerism and sparkle, and more on the good news of Jesus. Father God, thank you for sending us the greatest gift when you sent your Son to be born. May we all focus on you this season, not on the stress, pressure, or things. May _____________ remember that Christmas should be fun, but the most important part about it is you. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy December!!!  I am so very delighted to introduce you to one of my favorite moms on the planet - Dana Sheheane! This episode is a simple, rambling and lighthearted chat with one of my real life mom friends. You will LOVE her! She’s one of us folks. I feel like we can raise amazing Christian kids - if we are wearing the right bra and our coffee stays warm. Amen? So let’s dive into some practical ideas and a girlfriend chat.  The majority of the episode is just fun ideas and simple tips for your everyday life. However, don’t miss the end. We talk about a few intangible and critical things you need to survive in 2025 - from margin to community. Enjoy her wisdom and her adorable laugh!. In this episode, we chat about: Perimenopause Chico’sHeating matsStitch gunsEmbarrassing kids Best bra per DanaSolution for cold coffeeAnd much more! Love, Courtney (05:55) Parenting Insights and Challenges (11:58) Holiday Traditions and Family Dynamics (18:52) Navigating Hormonal Changes (29:56) Embracing Embarrassment as Parents (39:04) Must-Have Gadgets for Everyday Life (45:14) Finding Joy in Everyday Challenges (51:16) Building Community and Connection Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Resources from today’s show: Wild Interest podcast Dana’s Story - StoryTellersLive Part 1 Dana’s Story - StoryTellersLive Part 2 Lighthouse Family Retreat EOS Lotion- not cherry. No scent. We lied FYY Food Warming Mat  Dawn Platinum Powerwash Dish Spray Coffee Mug Warmer Stitch Gun Podcast episode i LOVED lately Diva Detergent Best Bra per Dana Treasures in the Dark by Katherine Wolf Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

As parents, we know raising kids is the opposite of neat and tidy. Each day brings wins, losses and valuable lessons. Pardon the Mess is a place where we discuss parenting and faith in a biblical, approachable and relatable way. We may cry and laugh while we learn and grow together in our beautiful mess. Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44) It’s one thing to love your neighbor as yourself, it’s a whole other thing to love your enemies. As believers, we aren’t called to ignore our enemies or to tolerate our enemies, we are called to love them and to pray for them. This is a radical teaching that goes against the norm in society because it is much easier to judge or gossip about our enemies (guilty!). But even more, we are supposed to love our enemies without expecting anything in return. Scripture makes it clear that the most powerful way we can actually love our enemies is to pray for them.  We begin to see a change in ourselves as we pray for others. First, we start to see our enemies the way God sees them, and God sees them as his beloved and dearly loved children, just like we are. Second, we can be freed from bitterness, resentment, and anger by praying for our enemies as our hearts are softened by the Holy Spirit.  So, this week let’s pray that our kids will love their enemies in a radical way and that they will begin to see themselves as God sees them. Father God, loving our enemies starts with us. I pray that ___________ would learn to love their prayed and pray for them while establishing healthy boundaries. I pray that their hearts are softened towards the people who treat them poorly so that they see them the way you do. I pray for reconciliation and peace if ________ is being bullied or bullying others. Give me wisdom in those conflicts. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I crave mentors and wisdom! I feel like I can spot wise women in any room. Lisa Clark is one of those mentors and I’m delighted to share her with you today. You will absolutely love hearing her “best and worst parenting advice” as she thinks back over her 35 years of parenting.  As a grandmother now, she is at a place in life where she can look back and assess what was true and what wasn’t. Some advice is helpful and some is not. Some advice is biblical and some is not. Lisa shares so many incredible pieces of encouragement with us today - from how to discipline, the role of dads, when and how to have sex talks and much more. Lisa prioritizes her faith in a beautiful way but also has a very solid grasp on the realities we are facing as moms. I always feel lighter and more encouraged after time with her.  My favorite part is at the end when she shares why we should be deliberate in teaching the gospel. She gives very specific ways we can do this and reminds us why it matters. I am praying that you feel so deeply seen in this episode and that the work you are doing as a mom matters.  In this episode we discuss: Some best and worst parenting adviceWhy adult children are amazingHow to trust our gut as mothersHow to help our kids learn boundariesHow to be our child’s advocate first Enjoy! Courtney  (00:00) Navigating Grandparenting Dynamics (02:12) The Myth of 18 Years (04:31) Evolving Relationships with Adult Children (06:50) The Balance of Discipline and Gentle Parenting (10:51) Challenging Conventional Parenting Advice (14:58) Trusting Your Instincts as a Parent (18:24) Navigating Kindness and Boundaries (20:29) The Importance of Sleep Schedules (22:25) Open Conversations About Sex (25:52) The Balance of Parenting Styles (30:33) Empowering Dads in Parenting (33:38) Intentional Gospel Teaching Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Resources from today’s show: Wild Interest podcast Connect with Lisa Clark Raising Sinners book by Lisa Clark Raising Sinners podcast by Lisa Clark Age of Opportunity by Paul David Tripp Crossover at OU Dr. David and Amanda Erickson episode - Discipline, Consequences Birds & Bees (Mary Flo Ridley) Dangers of Growing Up in a Christian Home Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:34–35) We are commanded to love others the way we love ourselves—which is kind of hard when we sometimes aren’t so nice to ourselves (we can pray against that for our kids). But we are also called to love others the way Jesus loves us: sacrificially and actively. For our kids, love as an action means more than being kind to everyone, it means our kids notice when someone is left out and they include them. It means forgiving others, standing up for others, noticing the lonely, and looking for ways to serve others. It’s not always easy, but it’s always good. When we love people in this way, the people around us notice that there is something different about us. The love of Christ shines bright so the whole world can see that we are his disciples. That is what it is all about because, at the end of the day, the most loving thing we can do for the people around them is to tell them about Jesus and his great love for us. So this week let’s pray that our kids love others with their words and their actions. Let’s pray that when people see the way our kids treat others, they will see Jesus in them. Jesus, thank you for loving us. Help ____________ to notice the lonely, the sad, and the hurting and love them well. May they always seek to be more than kind to everyone, but be moved to action so that they can show the world around them your love. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What an absolute delight! If I could have dinner with 5 people (dead or alive) - it would be Jesus, Princess Diana, my grandmother, Mother Teresa and Bob Goff. What about you? Are there people in the world that have shaped your mind and heart? Bob’s first book, Love Does, had a significant impact on my faith and the way I parent my kids. So, you can imagine it was PURE JOY to have this conversation today. He sprays wisdom, inspiration and joy like confetti - so you will not be short on takeaways for this one. I loved his encouragement for us to, “GO BE YOU!” He encourages us to reconnect and rediscover how God made us. When we do that, we have less comparison with other moms. And we can settle into who we are. And then, as parents, we get to help our kids settle into who they are. One of my favorite parts is when he talks about his role as a dad and grandfather. He encourages us to ask “What do they uniquely need that only I could give?” Let’s sit with that today and try not to overcomplicate it. What do our kids, friends and family need that only I could give? - Courtney Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Resources from today’s show: BobGoff.com Catching Whimsy - Bob’s new book Love Does - Bob’s first book Daily Drills In This House, We Will Giggle  Wild Interest podcast Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads” (Deuteronomy 6:5–8) To love God with all our hearts is to love God despite our emotions and our circumstances. To love God with all our soul is to rest in him. It is to know our creator and to be in relationship with him, knowing that he is where we will find peace and eternal rest.  To love God with all our mind is to know God, but also trust him with our life, our soul, and our story. It is to know that he is sovereign and knows what is best for us. To love God with all our strength is to live our faith in everyday life. It is to serve him by using the gifts that he has given us, being the hands and feet of Jesus, and putting into practice all the things we know to be true about God. We love God fully when we love him in these ways and it is that full love that overflows into the way we love others. So this week, let’s pray that our kids will love God fully in every area of their lives. Jesus, you love us completely, fully, and perfectly. May __________ love you with their whole heart, soul, mind, and strength. May their love overflow in a way that everyone around them notices there is something different about them. May they grow in their love for you every day and every year. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope you are having a beautiful day with your friends and family. I am so very thankful for each of you. I got to meet several of you in person at a recent retreat - and you were so kind to stop me and tell me the impact this podcast is having on your life. I care about each of you so much and it was so refreshing to meet you in person and hug you tight.  Today’s episode is just ME! I decided to pause from interviewing guests and start a series that we will sprinkle in over the next year or so. As I am launching my first child into the world, it’s fun to look back and think “What mattered most?” One of the things that has mattered most in our parenting journey is the topic of GENEROSITY.  As Ron and I reflect, we do believe making that a priority in our home has genuinely impacted our girls’ faith - in big and small ways. We didn’t always get it right - but we did make sure we spent very practical time giving to others. This is way more than giving money - it’s our time, talents and more. Today, you will hear some super practical ideas too for the holiday season. You can find 100 free ideas over at Light ‘Em Up. Enjoy this season with your family shining the light of God. Praying we each have eyes to see where God is moving and that we have the courage to step in and be a part of it this Christmas season. Send me some stories after the fact! Much love, Courtney  00:00 Thanksgiving Greetings and Gratitude 10:25 Living Generously: Personal Stories and Experiences 20:02 Creative Acts of Kindness and Community Engagement 25:52 Making Room for Generosity 33:20 Listening for God's Guidance Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Resources from today’s show: Light ‘Em Up - acts of kindness ideas In This House, We Will Giggle - Courtney’s first book Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:16–18) We tend to tie gratitude to our situation. We feel grateful if life is good or we feel happy. We feel grateful when God answers our prayers the way we want.  But God’s challenge to us is to rejoice always, pray continually, and give thanks in all circumstances! And even when we don’t feel thankful for our circumstances, we can be thankful for this: God loves us enough to heal us (like he healed the lepers), God loves us enough to provide for us, protect us, and guide us. And most importantly God loves us enough to send his only Son, Jesus, to die on the cross and forgive us our sins.  On our kids’ journey of faith, it’s important that they learn to love God by expressing their gratitude to him. This week, let’s pray that our kids always have a grateful heart, even when it’s hard. Let’s pray that they would recognize God’s blessing in their lives and actively praise him for them.   Jesus, thank you for showering us with blessings and for changing our lives by going to the cross! May ____________ always remember that you are good. May they bow before you in reverence and awe knowing that you are worthy of praise and may they acknowledge the way you work in their life, always remembering to have a posture of gratitude towards you. Amen. Listen to the Gratitude playlist on Spotify Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode was incredibly special to me. I have long admired Pastor Louie Giglio and the work he has done through Passion Conferences and Passion City Church. I invited Amelia McBrayer, one of my favorite college kids, to join me in chatting about how to find authentic faith in the college years. This episode is packed with wisdom on how to help encourage our kids (and all of us) to not just know ABOUT God, but to really KNOW God. Since 1997, Passion Conferences has gathered over one million collegiate-aged young people in events across the U.S. and around the world. It was so much fun to bring one of those students on the podcast with me today - to share what God has done through Passion and how her life has been impacted by Jesus. My favorite part is when he talks about the ups and downs of faith. That we need to keep praying and believing for the faith of our kids - but never to shove it on them. He encouraged us to spend more time doing what we want our kids to do. He reminds us that our time as parents in God’s word and praying will have a massive impact on the lives of our kids.  In this episode, we discuss: How to stop shoving faith on our kidsPower of praying and believing for your kids’ faithHow to practically put a touch point with God - easy ways to connectTips on how to grow in a community as a college young adult Enjoy! Courtney  Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 02:02 The Impact of Passion Conferences 06:03 Faith and College Life 10:51 Navigating Spiritual Challenges 15:04 The Power of Prayer and Authenticity 20:11 The Role of Devotionals 23:05 Maintaining Faith After Events 30:08 Prayer for the Next Generation Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Grace & Glory - Louie’s new devotional LouieGiglio.com Passion Conferences Passion City Church Christian Parenting store Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“‘For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace shall not be removed,’ says the Lord, who has compassion on you” (Isaiah 54:10 ESV) Everything in our world may change, but God’s love will not be moved. Our kids will be disappointed too many times to count over the course of their lives. Despite our best efforts, even we will let them down. But throughout it all, God will not change, will not leave them, and will never let them down. His love is steadfast. God loves us, and he loves our kids, with a fierce love. It’s hard to even wrap our heads around God’s love for us: the kind of love that led him to the action of sending his son to die on a cross to deliver us from our sins. While the unending, unshakeable, unbreakable, constant love of God may be hard to grasp, once we take hold of it, we won’t want to let it go. For our kids to truly live a journey of faith, they must recognize and accept the full, steadfast love of God. So this week, let’s pray that our kids will truly feel God’s love for them. The enemy will lie to them and make them doubt God’s love for them, so our prayers in this area are essential! Father God, you love us enough to send your one and only Son to die on the cross so we can be reconciled to you and live eternally with you. May ________________ fully know your steadfast love. I pray they feel your love wrapped around them today and every day, and I pray they can rest in that love. May they never doubt that no matter what is going on in their world, your love will not change. Amen. Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I am so fired up about this episode with Chris and Jan Woodruff. I believe serving together is one of the very best things you can do as a family. As I look back over 18 years as a mom, I can truthfully say that the times we have served together has deeply impacted each of us. We always see the best version of our family. Many times, the service opportunities are only available for teens and older. When we discovered Lighthouse, we found a way for our kids to serve as young as 4 years old. In this episode, we talk about the benefit of serving and putting others before yourself. My goal for today’s episode is that it unlocks the power of serving together and motivates many to find unique ways to serve as a family.  My favorite part of the episode is when we talk about the benefits of serving together. We have both seen unique benefits on each of our kids. They have practiced and prioritized serving others and we can now see how it has helped develop their character and passions and gifts.  Challenge today: Go on a date with your spouse or grab some girlfriends and brainstorm: “What are the top values we want to instill in our home? In our family culture? And then how can we be intentional to live out those values?” Enjoy! Courtney Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Family Background 03:02 The Importance of Service and Generosity 05:57 Building a Family Culture of Service 08:52 Transitioning from Volunteers to Staff 11:49 The Impact of Serving on Children 15:12 Finding Individual Strengths in Service 18:00 Creating Community Through Service 20:12 The Joy of Serving Together 22:25 Empathy and Growth Through Service 24:36 Building Community and Communication Skills 26:46 The Impact of Small Acts of Kindness 28:04 Finding Your Family's Serving Style 30:39 Navigating Overwhelm in Family Service 33:45 Encouragement for Busy Families 37:04 Getting Involved with Lighthouse Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Lighthouse Family Retreat Light ‘Em Up - 100 simple ideas and random acts of kindness In This House, We Will Giggle - Courtney’s book Under shorts for women - you’re welcome Christian Parenting store Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, ‘If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free’” (John 8:31–32 ESV) To abide in Christ is to remain, continue, or stay in Christ. It means taking what we know about who God is, who we are in Christ, and what the Bible says, and using those things to grow in a permanent relationship with the Lord. It means trusting him for all things—trusting we are loved, trusting his word is true, and trusting in his promises. Truly knowing and following Jesus means continuing to grow our relationship with him. It’s a relationship worth investing in because it is the one relationship that matters: a relationship with Jesus gives us eternal life, peace in this lifetime, and allows us to bear good fruit and do good works.  This week let's pray that our kids will know and abide with Christ their entire lives and commit to deepening their relationship with him every day. Jesus, I pray that ____________ would abide in you. That they would remain in your love and choose that every day of their lives. May they read scripture and learn about you in a way that lasts. Help them to keep your truth in their mind so that they may choose your ways over the world’s ways, and let it sink into their heart so that they become more and more like you. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

My friend, Heather MacFayden, is a mom of four boys and I am a mom of two girls. We have two very different (but equally enjoyable) parenting experiences. We are both podcasters, but we are also real life friends. We have had many conversations over the last 10 years about the unique differences between raising boys and girls.  We decided to take our offline conversations online for you! Part 1 is over at her podcast, Don’t Mom Alone - Boys vs Girls (Part 1): The Early Years. And today, you will hear Part 2 which is all about the dating years. We even get into the anxiety that comes with dances like homecoming and prom.  I learned several things from Heather about how boys are feeling during these dating years. After our chat, I immediately went and talked to the girls about how the guys may feel used at times. They are more than a prop in a photo. I was encouraged to hear that her boys want deep conversations and interesting girls.  My goal for this conversation was to grow our understanding and empathy of the opposite gender - especially if you only have 1 gender of children in your home. Let us know what you think! What do you wish moms of girls knew about boys? What do you wish moms of boys knew about girls? Send me a DM! In this episode, we discuss: -Dating challenges for teens today -Ideas on how to help boys and girls interact when curiosity begins -How social media and phones are impacting the dating process -Seeing behind the homecoming drama - what is going on with each gender Enjoy! Courtney  (02:00) Empathy in Parenting: Boys vs. Girls (04:04) The Challenges of Modern Dating (10:05) Navigating Social Events and Relationships (18:08) The Impact of Social Media on Dating Dynamics (20:21) The Pressure of Appearances in Relationships (21:06) Navigating Modesty and Self-Confidence (22:38) The Emotional Impact of Rejection (23:52) Social Media's Role in Self-Perception (24:40) Understanding Boys' Perspectives on Relationships (25:45) The Importance of Communication and Planning (27:39) The Dynamics of Dating and Social Expectations (29:52) Boys' Leadership in Social Situations (32:11) The Cost of Social Events and Expectations (33:34) Teaching Boys About Respect and Kindness (35:27) Building Confidence in Girls (37:53) Encouraging Individuality in a Conformist Culture (39:55) A Prayer for Our Children Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Resources from today’s show: HeatherMacFadyen.com Don’t Mom Alone Podcast The Best Christmas Pageant Ever Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend” (Proverbs 27:17 NLT) Godly friends make us better, not out of shame or peer pressure, but out of a desire to see us faithful to God and pursuing his will for our lives. Godly friends know that God wants more for us than what the world has to offer, and so they will push us in that direction when we start to veer from the path. Who our kids hang out with is important, iron sharpens iron and bad company corrupts character (1 Corinthians 15:33). Godly friends will help our kids grow in their faith and keep them accountable. Ungodly friends will bring them further and further from God’s truth. So this week, let’s pray that our kids will be surrounded by true, godly friends and be a light to the friends around them who don’t know Jesus. Jesus, I pray that ______________ surrounds  themselves with friends who know and love you. I pray they would encourage each other in faith, hold each other accountable, and that their friendships would draw them closer to you. Where there is conflict, may they be quick to show forgiveness, just as you forgave us. May _____________ be a light to those around them, always showing what a godly friend is. Amen. Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

These two episodes with Dr. David and Amanda Erickson are packed with practical ideas for the little years. Truthfully, it can be overwhelming to determine how to discipline, redirect, manage chaos while not breaking the spirit of your child. I see a cultural shift from one extreme (punishing behavior out of kids and using fear) to another extreme - letting the kids run the house with no rules.  This couple has an approach that I really believe in - they combine child development with scriptural truth. I wish I had had them when my kids were younger. They focus on “what to do” vs “what not to do” which puts an upfront emphasis on your family’s values and expectations.  My favorite part is when they talk about how to take a biblical value like “trustworthiness” and live it out in the home. As you listen to this episode, I am praying you feel equipped and not discouraged. Their way isn’t a prescribed formula - it’s a parenting philosophy that has many benefits and ideas attached to it. When my kids were little, it was so chaotic at times and I would get so overwhelmed at my lack of parenting principles and felt like I kept messing it up. You are not alone. Don’t give up! This work and effort will pay off. In this episode, we chat about: Cultural shifts in parenting stylesHow to build trust and honesty in parenting How to redirect behavior and manage chaosIdeas for discipline and consequences Enjoy! Courtney Part 1 (03:03) Parenting Principles and Practical Application (05:55) Cultural Shifts in Parenting Styles (09:04) The Importance of Early Emotional Development (11:53) Building Trust and Honesty in Parenting (15:11) Consequences and Discipline Strategies (17:53) Redirecting Behavior and Managing Chaos Part 2  (2:30) Understanding the Impact of Fear on Parenting  (6:33) The Importance of Separation in Conflict Resolution  (9:10) Timeouts: Purposeful or Punitive? (12:10) Channeling Physical Energy in Children (16:20) Teaching Control Over Emotions and Actions 5 (22:00) The Role of Respect in Parenting 2 (23:48) Assuming the Best: Navigating Disrespect 3 (27:20) Affirming Positive Behavior in Children 4 Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: The Flourishing Family - new book Identity Simplified The Best Christmas Pageant Ever Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

These two episodes with Dr. David and Amanda Erickson are packed with practical ideas for the little years. Truthfully, it can be overwhelming to determine how to discipline, redirect, manage chaos while not breaking the spirit of your child. I see a cultural shift from one extreme (punishing behavior out of kids and using fear) to another extreme - letting the kids run the house with no rules.  This couple has an approach that I really believe in - they combine child development with scriptural truth. I wish I had had them when my kids were younger. They focus on “what to do” vs “what not to do” which puts an upfront emphasis on your family’s values and expectations.  My favorite part is when they talk about how to take a biblical value like “trustworthiness” and live it out in the home. As you listen to this episode, I am praying you feel equipped and not discouraged. Their way isn’t a prescribed formula - it’s a parenting philosophy that has many benefits and ideas attached to it. When my kids were little, it was so chaotic at times and I would get so overwhelmed at my lack of parenting principles and felt like I kept messing it up. You are not alone. Don’t give up! This work and effort will pay off. In this episode, we chat about: Cultural shifts in parenting stylesHow to build trust and honesty in parenting How to redirect behavior and manage chaosIdeas for discipline and consequences Enjoy! Courtney Part 1 (03:03) Parenting Principles and Practical Application (05:55) Cultural Shifts in Parenting Styles (09:04) The Importance of Early Emotional Development (11:53) Building Trust and Honesty in Parenting (15:11) Consequences and Discipline Strategies (17:53) Redirecting Behavior and Managing Chaos Part 2  (2:30) Understanding the Impact of Fear on Parenting  (6:33) The Importance of Separation in Conflict Resolution  (9:10) Timeouts: Purposeful or Punitive? (12:10) Channeling Physical Energy in Children (16:20) Teaching Control Over Emotions and Actions 5 (22:00) The Role of Respect in Parenting 2 (23:48) Assuming the Best: Navigating Disrespect 3 (27:20) Affirming Positive Behavior in Children 4 Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: The Flourishing Family - new book Identity Simplified The Best Christmas Pageant Ever Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Hebrews 10:23–25 ESV) Getting our kids to church can be a real struggle. They may fight you about it at any age (toddler to teen), it’s early in the morning and everyone wants to sleep in, and it can be hard to find a church community that meets the needs of everyone in your family. You may have been hurt by the church and find it difficult to trust a faith community again. If you identify with any of that, you are not alone in these struggles! But we are not meant to do life alone and church is where we can find our best community. Attending church is also one of the ways we can get to know and experience God more. The discipleship that happens in church is about relationship. There is a reason people often refer to their congregation as their “church family.” It is a place of encouragement where brothers and sisters in Christ can build each other up in love and spur each other on in faith. So this week, let’s pray that our kids know and understand the value of church. Let’s pray that they will love the church and have a desire to serve with God’s family. Let’s ask God to help them love going to church and to feel loved, known, and safe there. God, thank you for the gift of church. I pray that _____________ would love going to church, that it would not be something we convince them to do, but something they participate in out of love for you and your family. May they use their gifts to expand your kingdom and serve your church. Amen. Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I couldn’t wait to have a chat with the founder, producer and director of The Chosen, Dallas Jenkins. Although that’s super cool - I also wanted it to be practical for us as parents. He was fantastic! My kids are very visual learners and I am sure many of your children are as well, so I wanted to hear his thoughts on creative storytelling. Some kids cannot read the Bible and get what they need right away. They don’t understand the context around the stories. Dallas is a master at providing context to scriptural truth through his TV series and films.  This conversation challenged me to keep thinking creatively about how we infuse virtues, values and faith in the lives of my kids. It encouraged me to keep living faith more than I lecture about it. We know that much of life’s most valuable lessons are “caught not taught.” It reminded me to relax if my kids are more into movies, books, music vs reading. My favorite part is the amazing God story behind his newest movie for kids, The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. It is truly extraordinary how it came about. I can't wait to take my kids to see it (with all of their friends) and kick off the season that is all about the birth of our Savior. In this episode, we chat about: How The Chosen series changed my neighbor’s lifeHow to use creative storytelling in your parenting How Dallas’ latest movie came about and how it can benefit your family Enjoy! Courtney (00:00) The Power of Friendship and Faith (02:53) Transformative Impact of 'The Chosen' (06:05) Family Dynamics and Sacrifices (09:01) Creative Storytelling in Parenting (12:00) The New Movie: The Best Christmas Pageant Ever (14:55) Behind the Scenes of the Movie Production (17:51) The Journey of Faith and Persistence (21:00) Encouragement for Families and Communities Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: The Chosen The Best Christmas Pageant Ever Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide Carpool Conversations  Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God” (Philippians 1:9–11) Biblical discernment is understanding something through the power of the Holy Spirit. It means being able to see what is good vs. evil, false teaching vs. truth, wise vs. unwise. Being discerning does not mean being judgemental, though it is easy to fall into that. Being discerning means being able to distinguish the voice and will of God from the noise of the world. It is so easy to accept what we see on social media, the news, or the internet as truth. But so often, it is far from the truth. Even our favorite Christian writers, podcasters, or pastors could share false teachings. Our kids are growing up in a world that is completely different from the world we grew up in. The access to information alone is overwhelming, which is why we need to be praying that our kids know how to discern God’s truth in the world around them.  Our kids will face peer pressure to do things that they know aren’t right, they will be taught to follow their emotions and desires over the Lord, and they will be told that there are ways that are better than God’s. The ability to recognize those things as harmful and untrue is a gift that we all desire for our kids.  For our kids to truly live in God’s will, they need to have a discerning spirit, so let’s pray for their ability to discern truth this week. Father God, I pray that ____________ will learn to test what they read, hear, and see with scripture. Help them to seek your truth above all else. I pray that your word will guide their paths. May they base their life on your truth instead of the lies of the enemy and of this world. Will you daily renew their minds and make their hearts wholeheartedly devoted to you? Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this week’s episode, I have the honor of chatting with Reese - a college-aged friend that I adore. She bravely shares her testimony - one that involves abuse by a coach, a “not guilty” jury decision and God’s faithfulness through it all. Reese wanted to come on and share her story so that parents see that an authentic faith is often born from life’s toughest struggles.  When I asked Reese’s mom about this journey, this was her text to me. “My daughter’s journey reminds us that God can use even our worst fears and redeem them. We can’t protect our kids from their testimony. God always takes what the enemy intends for evil for good. Maybe even their very purpose. Trusting him with their growth and process and pain. We were the parents with such tight controls. No sleepovers. No phones until HS. No ipads. Locked down YouTube. My control can’t protect her from everything.” My favorite part is when she shares a story of how God spoke directly to her during some of the hardest parts of her story. It gave me chills and also great comfort. It reminded me that no matter what our kids face - they will never be alone. I can either get swallowed up with fear and the “what if’s” of parenting or I can make the choice to lean into faith and trust God has them. He has them in the best of times and the worst.  I am so excited for you to hear from an 18-year-old with a solid and authentic faith that wasn’t born out of a perfect life. Her faith is hers, it’s tested and it’s remarkable.  In this episode, we discuss: Reese’s story of abuse Authentic faith birthed through hardest timesHow she experienced God so personally Rees’s encouragement for parents  Enjoy, Courtney 00:00 Introduction and Background 02:01 Impacting Children's Faith 04:18 Overcoming Abuse and Finding Identity in Christ 08:47 Timeline and Legal Proceedings 17:06 Experiencing God through Visions and Dreams 19:28 The Table of the Lord 27:50 Encouragement for Parents Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Reese’s ministry - Abundant Grace God Made All Of Me - recommended book for littles Birds and Bees Birds and Bees Episode Untold - her favorite ministry in Africa Ella’s purple dress from Amazon Identity Simplified Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“But Jesus told him, 'No! The Scriptures say, "People do not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God"’” (Matthew 4:4 NLT) Reading the Bible and memorizing scripture matters because it is one way we can fight the battles in our own lives—both big and small. Scripture can help our kids (and us!) feel confident in our God-given identity, face a life crisis, and everything in between. Knowing God’s word also develops our faith and brings us closer to God. Every bit of scripture is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12), God-breathed, and teaches us to live righteously (2 Timothy 3:16).  The more we know God’s word and keep it in our hearts, the more we understand God’s heart and his ways, aligning our wills to his. The word of God protects us from the desire to do it all by ourselves and replaces that desire with the desire to let God direct our paths. God loves us too much to leave us to our own devices. He reveals truth to us through his word so that the desires of our hearts become more like his! So this week, let’s pray that our kids will know the word of God and lean on it to guide them in every area of their lives.  Father God, I pray that  ____________ grows to learn your word, love your word, and see it as holy and infallible.  May they love the Bible and read it daily with the goal of knowing your heart more and more. May they rely on your word to direct their paths. Remind them to hide your word in their hearts so they can use it to fight any battle they face—now and in the future. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It’s an absolute delight to have my dear friend Lysa TerKeurst on the podcast today. Lysa has been sharing her deepest struggles through writing books, devotionals and bible studies for decades. She has a beautiful way combining biblical truth and heartfelt empathy that makes us all feel less alone.  In today’s episode, we discuss TRUST and DISTRUST. She shares that when you starve a relationship from trust - it’s like not giving a human air to breathe. I can imagine that many of you are working through some trust issues - we all are. Whether it’s a broken friendship or marriage or a strained relationship with a family member or dear friend. It can be really hard to manage the healing and repairing process for yourself and even more difficult when it involves your children.  One of my favorite parts is when she talks about the importance of healing in a community. She shares how natural it can be to isolate when you’re hurt - but trust rebuilds in community. I am praying this episode touches a tender topic with such encouragement and practical help. In this episode we discuss: Why trust is crucial to all human relationshipsHow to manage broken hearts and relationships while raising kidsHow to move towards healing with resilience  Enjoy! Courtney 00:00 Practical Wisdom and Biblical Truth: A Conversation on Trust and Distrust 03:16 The Impact of Broken Trust: Emotional Abuse and Betrayal Trauma 15:24 Triggers and Discernment: Patterns of Behavior and Self-Exploration 32:55 Resilience and Healing: Overcoming Broken Trust Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: LysaTerKeurst.com I Want To Trust You, But I Can’t - Lysa’s newest book Dr Amen and Lysa - her brain scan EMDR Therapy WOW - root cover up Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us” (1 John 5:14) One amazing way our kids can know more about God is through prayer. The practice of prayer involves talking to God and listening to God. We tend to be better at the talking part because, with the busyness of our lives, it can be a real challenge to slow ourselves down and listen to God! But we can’t hear a whisper when we’re running. As parents, our role is to help guide our kids into a mature faith where they can quiet themselves enough to hear God’s voice.  Prayer should not be an afterthought in our minds. Going to God and conversing with him should be our first thought when we start a new day, face a dilemma, or experience something great! We know prayer changes things. Prayer transforms hearts, renews minds, and gives us peace that passes all understanding. We need to remember that promise because God, who wants to talk with us, will answer every prayer. It might just look different than we expect – sometimes “no” is an answer and other times we won’t understand how he answered a prayer until much later, or even heaven.  So this week let’s pray that our kids stand in confidence, knowing that God always hears them and wants to talk with them. Lord, may ______________ make prayer a priority in their schedule. When something happens, may their first instinct be to talk to you about it, not anybody else. I pray they learn to hear your voice, submit to your will, and deepen their relationship with you through prayer. Give them an eternal perspective, knowing that all their prayers may not be answered in the way they envision, but they will be answered in your perfect way. May they grow to be a mighty prayer warrior, confident in the transforming power of prayer. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you ever feel far from God? This week, we get to dive into a crucial conversation with Jeannie Cunnion. She helps us unpack this very common feeling amongst believers. She has so much encouragement around why God desires us to get closer and closer. And then, she also gives us practical ways we can grow closer to God.  There isn’t a finish line for growing closer to God. We are all on our own journey with God. It’s personal and it takes time and it’s never-ending. However, we so often compare ourselves to other Christians in our lives. We believe others have arrived spiritually and we are behind. I am praying this chat gives you assurance and comfort in your own journey - no matter where you are in this season. My favorite part is when we talk about “effort” vs “earn.” Sometimes, we confuse our effort to grow with the desire to earn something. The truth is that we can take steps to get to know God more without getting stuck in the lie that we must earn God’s love. Let this conversation with Jeannie give you peace and a new desire to grow closer to God through His presence. In this episode, we discuss: What to do when you feel far from GodHow do we learn to put effort into our faith - without feeling we must earn itHow to be on your own faith journey - while parenting kids on their own journeyWhy do we do what we don’t want to do   Enjoy! Courtney Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: JeannieCunnion.com Closer To God - Jeannie’s new devotional Mom Set Free Christy Nockels  Carpool Conversations White Bird Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Colossians 3:12) The world will tell our kids many things about who they are, and some of those things will be true and encouraging. Other messages from the world will be lies, and difficult to hear. No matter who is mean to our kids, what school they go to, or what position they play on the field, our kids belong to God. Your child is God’s child, holy and dearly loved. He or she is called upon, adopted, redeemed, and sanctified. Your child was created with intention for a purpose and God calls them precious.  So let’s pray that our kids will always stand firm in their identity in Christ so that their confidence will not shake when the world feels unsteady. Let’s ask God to help them base their identity and security in him alone. Father God, thank you for calling __________ your child. Help them to remember that you love them and call them by name, that you have adopted them into your family, and lavish your love upon them. May they know deep in their hearts that their identity does not rest in what the world says about them, but in what you say. You say they are yours! Amen. Interested in reading more? Here are 90 Biblical truths about your identity in Christ. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I hope you are finding a theme on this podcast. I am always trying to bring you conversations about real-life problems that us moms face on a daily basis. Also, I want to always point us back to Jesus as well as practical ideas to move forward.  Today’s episode is one of those issues we face on a regular basis: Alyssa Bethke is passionate about this idea of “being all and doing all.” She really digs into why women struggle with this. My intentions aren’t always bad as a “doer” - they just aren’t sustainable. I would love to fix it all, handle it all and make sure everyone in my life is happy. I really, really struggled with this in my 20s and 30s. However, I am so excited that I have grown in this area and found ways to trust what he’s calling me to do - and only those things.  I love how Alyssa asks herself this question, “Lord, what is mine to do?” Don’t miss this part at the end when she gives us how she practically handles the pressure of many demands on us. As moms, this pressure to help, fix and support our kids is very real. It is very hard to face that reality - that there is never enough time or energy to do and be all. And that is where our faith comes in. How can we really lean into God so that we know what is ours to take and then we have peace surrendering the rest? In this episode, we discuss: The struggle of doing it all as a momThe gift of boundaries and how to say noFinding rest in God’s grace and what he calls us to do Enjoy! Courtney Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 01:18 The Struggle of Trying to Do It All 08:11 Setting Boundaries and Saying No 11:08 Seeking God's Guidance in Each Season 14:58 The Desire for Control and Predictability 16:16 Finding Rest in God's Grace 16:48 The Struggle of Control and the Call to Surrender 19:05 Honesty and Unmet Expectations in Our Relationship with God 20:33 Parenting: Trusting God and Surrendering Control 25:55 Trusting in God's Goodness and Seeking His Guidance Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Alyssa Bethke Instagram  Jeffandalyssa.com When Doing It All, Is Undoing You - new book Gamechanger Amazon List Amazon List - more ideas White Bird Movie Carpool Conversations Christian Parenting store Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“I am telling you these things now while I am still with you. But when the Father sends the Advocate as my representative—that is, the Holy Spirit—he will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you” (John 14:25–26 NLT) When we declare Jesus to be our Savior and commit to following him, the Holy Spirit enters us and changes our lives forever! With the Holy Spirit’s help and guidance, we can begin to live more like Jesus and display his character, learn the truth about God, receive and grow in our spiritual gifts, and have the power and courage to share our faith. The same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives in us when we believe. The Holy Spirit helps us in every aspect of our faith journey. When it comes to our kids, let’s pray that they would position their hearts to know the Holy Spirit and hear his voice, respond to his love, and let him guide their lives. Lord, may ______________ grow to love you more and more every day. May they feel the presence of your Holy Spirit alive in them. Make their hearts soft so they can be more responsive to you, and when the world tries to pull them away from you and your ways, may they rely on the Holy Spirit to direct their paths. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have a brand you love in your house? My girls have been obsessed with all the beautiful jewelry pieces of enewton for many years. I am always intrigued when I see a mom running a massive business. My hunch was that Eizabeth Newton was a faithful, generous and fun CEO. I learned that she is even more than that! Elizabeth shares her story of raising triplets (and a 2-year-old) in the beginning years of enewton. She shares about her passion for generosity and how that has stayed with the company through the incredible growth and expansion. She also shares some practical ways that you can involve your kids in your business while prioritizing your family above all. She offers so many nuggets of parenting wisdom through our chat, but I really loved her parting words for us. She encourages us to “show up and give yourself grace.” I know I needed that reminder as a mom that is trying so hard to get it right. We are doing better than we think. Keep giving it your best and give yourself loads of grace!  In this episode, we discuss: Juggling business and kidsStarting a business with tripletsInstilling faith practically in her home Conflict, comparison and celebration as siblings Raising independent kids  Enjoy ! Courtney  Chapters: 00:00 Introduction and shared connections 03:18 Having fun and not taking oneself too seriously 05:28 Parenting triplets and starting a business 08:54 The growth of enewton and giving back 12:49 Prioritizing presence and grace 15:35 Creating lasting memories and prioritizing what matters 18:08 Incorporating ministry into work and family life 20:24 Celebrating others and teaching independence 25:37 Showing up for your children and giving yourself grace Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: enewton enewton Instagram Flourishing Families Read Again and Again Bible Storybooks Christian Parenting store Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him” (John 3:16–17 NLT) Jesus’ death on the cross gives us access to God again. It’s not just about eternal life with him, though he promises his followers that. Choosing Jesus is also about experiencing a peace that passes all understanding and building a relationship with the father right here and right now.  Jesus took what was broken in our world and made it whole again and he can do the same for us.  So this week let’s pray that our kids will know Jesus as the savior of the world and choose to follow him every day of their lives. Let’s pray they would come to know him as the way, the truth, and the life. Jesus, thank you for coming to the world and sacrificing yourself for our sins. May __________ come to understand the gift of salvation, accept your grace, and choose to follow you. May they know that they cannot earn your grace, but it is a free gift that comes from the love you have for them. Amen. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Sophie Hudson aka “Boo Momma” is one of the funniest speakers and podcasters I have ever been around. Sophie has a way about sharing truth and encouragement in this most relatable way. Today, we cover key topics from Peepers (readers you need) to why Birmingham women are so classy and then we spend most of our chat time discussing women and leadership. In this episode, she shares the hard truth that our churches and communities have not always prepared women for leadership. As moms, we so often wonder if we even have gifts? And we often don’t even see ourselves as leaders.  This conversation is a really important one for us as women. Sophie goes into ways we can embrace our roles as women and how to walk fully and confidently in our God-given gifts.This episode is very profound and at the same time practical. You will walk away with tangible things you can do today to see yourself more clearly - how God made you a leader. If you have sons, don’t miss the beginning part as she shares about what God is teaching her as a parent of a grown son. She has some beautiful encouragement for moms of sons and how their relationship has morphed and strengthened over time. I am praying you feel this conversation so fired up and excited to discover your gifts and go lead with passion! I pray that through his conversation we learn to be kind to ourselves and gracious as we learn who we are. Let’s pay attention to what makes us come alive and SEE clearly how God wired us to glorify Him right where we are. In this episode, we discuss: Raising sons and what’s she’s learning latelyWhy women don’t see ourselves as leadersHow we can begin to identity our unique giftsHow to see yourself as God sees you - finding your unique wiring  Enjoy ! Courtney  What brings you alive?  00:00 Introduction and Family Background 01:37 Active Parenting and Engaging in Conversations 04:23 The Growth of Self-Awareness in Children 07:56 The Importance of Light-Heartedness in Leadership 09:11 Empowering Women in Leadership 12:13 Recognizing and Embracing Leadership Gifts 15:56 Finding Peace in Pursuing Passions 20:02 Bringing Joy and Encouragement in Everyday Life 21:17 Finding Purpose and Identity Beyond Motherhood 23:26 Embracing Your Unique Gifts and Talents 25:53 Prioritizing Personal Interests and Passions 35:31 Living a Life that Brings Joy and Glory to God Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: SophieHudson.com Big Boo Cast A Fine Sight To See - her newest book Peepers Daily Drills HomeGoods Camp  White Bird Carpool Conversations Podcast Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Scripture tells us that God is like a potter and we are like the clay that he works with (Isaiah 64:8). He forms us with his hands, but he doesn’t forget about us once he is done! We are not a clay pot that sits on a shelf and is only touched when we remember to dust it every now and then. No, God continues to shape us.In fact, God loves us so much that he calls us his own! When we choose to follow Jesus, we are adopted into God’s family where there is both freedom and grace. Our father is so faithful to us that even when we don’t choose him or we run away from him, he waits for us and rejoices when we return. There is nothing we, or our kids, could ever do that would make our heavenly father love us less (or more!).So this week, let’s pray that our kids know God as the good father that he is.  Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I didn’t know “swap” was a thing in podcasting. Who knew? It was an immediate YES when we got the opportunity to swap episodes with my dear friends Sissy Goff and David Thomas. You will get to hear one of their actual episodes from the Raising Boys and Girls podcast - to get a glimpse of how they support parents across the world.  These two have helped raise my kids in some ways. I have read every book they have written and listened to every episode of their podcast. Sissy and David, with Raising Boys and Girls, offer clinical experience and grace-filled encouragement for every stage of our parenting. You will see a glimpse of their practical parenting support and tender encouragement in this episode.  When you were growing up, did your parents pass a feelings chart around the dinner table? Or did you have healthy conversations around emotions? We’re guessing, for most of us, that’s a no—but we’d love to hear in the comments! In case you didn’t or are just wondering what a healthy emotional vocabulary looks like for your family, this episode is the one for you! In it, Sissy and David discuss what it looks like to fold an emotional vocabulary into the life of your family, plus stumbling blocks and building blocks that are often more specific to girls and boys (and maybe mom’s and dad’s, too). We hope it helps and that you’re HAPPY and ENCOURAGED once you have a chance to listen! Grab a copy of Are My Kids on Track? to follow along with us through the season over on our podcast, Raising Boys and Girls. And be sure to listen for Pardon The Mess as we appear on their podcast in the next couple weeks! Enjoy! Courtney  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Celebrating around the Table Politics Simplified Resources from today’s show: Sign up for Raising Boys & Girls monthly newsletter to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Tune into more of this series on the Raising Boys & Girls podcast Go behind the scenes and watch Sissy & David’s podcast on YouTube! Download a copy of the Raising Boys and Girls Feelings Chart. Connect with David, Sissy, and Melissa at raisingboysandgirls.com. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The mother-daughter relationship can be the most special bond out there. However, it can also be tough in many seasons. The mother-daughter duo of Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney are on the podcast today to give us very practical tips on ways to build, maintain and strengthen our relationships with our daughters. As we think about the mother-daughter relationship, we can often jump to the things we need to add to our plate. We feel guilty that we aren’t doing enough. Sandra shares that we may need to actually eliminate things. We may need to limit what we do - to make room for this important relationship.  As a mom of daughters, I absolutely loved this chat and it gave me so many great ideas I can still implement in my own home. However, if you have sons, you will still gain some great thoughts on connecting with all of your children. My favorite part of the episode is when Allie shares about her college experience and how she made her faith her own. Her insight was really helpful to me about our kids finding their identity and how they can change from “I have to love Jesus” to “I want to love Jesus.” So many powerful moments from two of my favorite people. In this episode: Creating a safe and loving environment for daughtersHow to pass on an authentic faithHow to show interest in your child’s life Enjoy! Courtney 00:00 Introduction and Mother-Daughter Similarities 03:50 Creating a Safe and Loving Environment for Daughters 07:16 Passing on Faith: Modeling and Encouraging a Personal Relationship with God 16:14 Modeling Authentic Faith 18:36 Personal Faith Journey 22:11 Staying Stable in Parenting 24:12 Being Available and Humble 28:30 Showing Interest in Your Child's Life 30:23 Adjusting Parenting Approaches Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: SandraStanley.com Allie Stanley Instagram Meet Me In The Middle - their new book I Said This, You Heard That - temperament book Parenting book by Andy and Sandra Stanley Allie & Courtney - previous podcast episode Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you ever had a season where you question everything about yourself? Have you found yourself in an insecure spot and wonder if you’re too late or too old? Do you wonder if you have anything to offer the world? I have been in this place more times than I can count. Being a mom and balancing career and purpose and raising kids can be very complicated and very discouraging. It’s so very hard to discern what to do when God feels quiet and sometimes the path feels uncertain or vulnerable. My guests today, Cari Trotter and Terri Flannagan, share their own stories about why it’s so hard to discern around career and calling. I believe their honest feelings and practical advice will encourage you in your own journey. Please don’t miss this entire episode. It’s a little long, so you may need to listen in two parts. My favorite part is at the end when we start tackling the practical stuff. What do we do with a complicated situation? How can we take a step? How can we discern what to do in the next season? I pray this episode meets you in such a special way. That you feel like we opened your heart and soul and spoke to a place that needs encouragement. I am insanely thankful for authentic and honest friends that love me and love Jesus. It’s a true gift. In this episode, we discuss: Handling a midlife crisis, work and reinventing ourselvesBalancing careers and raising kidsHow to discern what God has for us How to fight the very loud lies that want us silent and frozen 00:00 Introduction and Entertaining Start 04:02 Talking About Fashion and Passion Projects 05:50 Midlife Crisis, Work, and Reinventing Ourselves 08:51 Introductions and Current Life Situations 11:54 Why Balancing Work and Personal Life is Hard 16:38 Discerning What's Next and Dealing with Lies 22:13 Navigating Transitions and Evaluating Priorities 25:20 Dealing with Comparison and Seeking Authenticity 27:13 Being True to Yourself and Finding Support 31:48 Conclusion and Final Thoughts 34:46 Staying Rooted and Grounded 37:13 Embracing Silence and Growth 44:34 The Journey of Faith 50:56 Redefining Success 57:45 Embracing Struggles and Failure Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: CariTrotter.com Party On Purpose - Cari’s business with girls Cari’s Instagram TerriFlannagan.com The Unreal Reel - Terri’s Instagram Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You can imagine, I have been quite excited to share this episode with you all. Priscilla Shirer is one of the gifted preachers that has inspired me and challenged me so much over the years. I was so thrilled to get a chance to interview her about her latest movie and book. The Forge, produced by The Kendrick Brothers, is set to release next week. I Surrender All, her latest book, just came out last week.  Both of those new projects are all about surrender. How can we surrender our lives and go from being a believer to a disciple? I loved how she teaches us about that difference and how the idea of surrendering all can truly impact our faith (and our families). Although Priscilla is a world-renowned teacher, preacher, actor and writer - she’s also a mom, just like us, giving it her very best. I love hearing about the ways her amazing parents instilled the practices of faith. She shares about their consistency and what she remembered about growing up in a house that honored God. Don’t forget to grab your Prayer Journal! We will be starting to pray through that together on Pardon The Mess on September 9. Grab a friend or your small group and let’s commit to pray for our kids this entire school year. In this episode, we chat about: The difference between being a believer and a disciple How to walk through grief and hold onto your faithHow to instill faith in our kids when they aren’t into itHow to stay consistent with honoring God with your kids Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Priscilla Shirer - Priscilla’s ministry, Going Beyond The Forge - Her latest movie I Surrender All - Her latest book Evans Family on Death & Loss Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We are finishing our Summer of Stories with Nicole Zasowski. She is a counselor, author and speaker that shares her painful story of infertility and miscarriage. Many of you know too well what it’s like to embrace joy when you’ve walked through so much loss and disappointment. Nicole bravely encourages us all that it’s possible. It’s possible to find joy and practice thanksgiving even when mourning and grief is very present. Make sure you follow along this week on Pardon The Mess Instagram page. I will share the picture of all of her kids that stopped me in my tracks. The photo was edited to feature her 3 kids on earth and her 5 kids in heaven all walking together on the beach. This photo so beautifully depicted the reality that Nicole is a mom of eight children, not just three. If you have been through loss like Nicole, I believe you will be so encouraged by her honesty about the emotions she feels and her journey with God through it all. My favorite part is when she shares about the brain science behind negativity and joy. She shares practical ideas on how we can lean towards and practice savoring joyful moments. We can store these memories in a part of our brain that helps us recall them again and again. Praying for each of you now, that you feel seen and heard through this episode. I pray that God meets you in the tender, broken and disappointed places of your heart.  Much love, Courtney  In this episode, we chat about: Nicole’s journey with infertility and miscarriageLeaning into God with all of your emotionsHow sadness can help us find the joyHow to practically celebrate and savor moments when life is hard Timestamps: 0:00 Introduction and Background 03:48 Struggling with Infertility and Miscarriage 08:09 Feeling Alone and Finding Support 11:35 Journey Between Children 16:01 The Vulnerability of Joy 22:24 Holding Both Pain and Joy 24:17 The Power of Celebration 27:56 Savoring Everyday Moments 30:21 Celebration as a Rhythm 35:40 Engaging God in Joy and Pain Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: NicoleZasowski.com Lost to Found What If It’s Wonderful  NLT Student Thinline Reference Bible Hope for your Homeschool Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to Week 9 of our Summer of Stories series! This Summer we have been featuring stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments.  In this week’s story, you will hear from the hilarious and wise Karen Stubbs. How many people can say they married a Top Gun fighter pilot? Well, Karen married that guy we saw in the movies. However, she very quickly realized that the cute uniform wasn't that cute when he was away most days of the month. Karen’s story is one of raising her young four kids without support. So many of you know this road - whether you are a single mom, have a husband that travels or works often or even if you live from friends and community. Karen shares the very honest truth of what God did when she felt completely alone and isolated in motherhood. Make sure you get to the end when Karen shares about parenting very different personalities. She explains why it’s so important that we really know how our kids operate and the benefits of parenting them with strengths in mind.  I am praying Karen’s story reaches so many moms that feel in over their heads and you find reassurance that God is with you every step of the way. Karen is now a grandmother and runs a global ministry for moms. She has mounds of wisdom and truth that you will enjoy! In this episode, we discuss: How to parent alone from single parenting to a traveling husbandHow to practically survive in a world with little support and communityWhen you realize your husband cannot meet your needsHow to parent kids with unique personalitiesWhen your child questions their faith Love, Courtney 00:00 Introduction and Background 02:53 Challenges of Military Life 08:01 Relying on God to Meet Needs 11:03 Impact on Children and Marriage 14:25 Understanding and Parenting According to Temperaments 20:13 Navigating the Challenges of Raising Kids in the Church 24:16 Finding Hope in Difficult Circumstances 31:49 Practical Parenting Advice from 'The Survival Guide to Motherhood' Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Birds On A Wire Moms Wire Talk Podcast Survival Guide to Motherhood by Karen Stubbs Pinc Ministries with Ashley Hicks Temperament & Personality Quiz Parenting Together NLT Student Thinline Reference Bible Hope for your Homeschool Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders community Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to Week 8 of our Summer of Stories series! This summer we have been featuring stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments.  In this week’s story, you will hear from the extraordinary Cleere Cherry Reaves. It’s very likely that you have one of her beautiful products and didn’t even know it. Her massive heart for Jesus pours right into her beautiful company. I have enjoyed so many of her books, devotions and gifts for years.  In the first part of our chat, we talked about her business and entrepreneurial spirit. So many of us moms have a creative stirring from God and we often aren’t sure what to do with that. How do we pursue a creative idea while raising kids? We often get overwhelmed and just put it aside. I’m praying that there’s a few moms listening that need to regain confidence and motivation to explore the creative ideas God put inside your heart. The second part of our talk was my favorite! Cleere shares her story of going into labor prematurely and the miracle story that follows. Cleere’s son, Sledge, has faced so many uphill battles and has suffered more than any mom wishes on their child. Maybe you have a child with a tough diagnosis? Or you know of another mom with a motherhood journey that went differently than expected? This episode is for us all. We can all learn from Cleere’s undeniable faith and perseverance as she raises one strong and mighty boy. Love, Courtney Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Small Talk 04:48 Creating Products that Serve a Purpose 09:36 The Challenges and Rewards of Entrepreneurship 13:03 Starting a Business with a Specific Person in Mind 16:11 Supporting and Celebrating Others in the Entrepreneurial Journey 28:12 From Challenges to Miracles: Trusting God's Plan 35:45 The Impact of Perspective on Others 37:37 Embracing Authenticity and Finding Joy 46:01 Trusting in the Character of God 49:59 The Power of Community and Support Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Cleerely Stated Promises from the Psalms - card set I bought Ella Unfiltered - Cleere’s new devotional StrongHeart Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders community Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to Week 7 of our Summer of Stories series! This Summer we have been featuring stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments.  In this week’s story, you will hear from the delightful, creative and intentional Erin Burchik. She is a family friend and I have long-admired her approach to parenting. She desperately wants to enjoy each of her kids and embrace the “good ole days” of kids in the home. She will share how traveling and taking trips became a passion of hers. And she will share some super practical ways to make trips doable and affordable when you’re on a budget. Before we get to the scoop on traveling for less, she shares her story about becoming a mom. Through many trials and some devastating financial loss, Erin has fought through doubt and frustration with God. She felt called to adopt and then it didn’t go as smoothly as she had hoped. It’s so fun to see her on the other side of this battle and see the family that God designed from the very beginning.  My favorite part is when she explains the WHY behind their family adventures. She’s not traveling to flex on Instagram or show off or waste money. She’s traveling because she wants to create memories with her kids, to carve out time to adventure together and to get out of their comfort zone. I love her approach! In this episode, we discuss: Erin’s journey to motherhood - foster care and adoptionHow to find community with other adopted familiesHow to exchange gifts for experiences at ChristmasHow to find creative ways to do big trips on a little budget Enjoy!! Courtney Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 04:02 The Journey of Adoption 08:57 Building a Supportive Community 18:13 Creating Lasting Memories 20:05 Santa Bringing Christmas Trips 22:10 Maximizing Credit Card Points 25:29 Saving Thousands on Family Trips 28:21 Benefits of Traveling with Kids 30:15 Building Independence and Confidence 33:31 Enjoying Motherhood and Savoring the Moments Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: StrongHeart Erin’s Instagram Erin’s travel site - Points For Families Erin’s book - Animals of the Nativity Erin’s book - The Bear Hug TBRI for families that have adopted Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders community Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When I engage with young moms, I often get asked a lot about alcohol. These women are wanting me to give them an “official answer” about how a Christian woman should handle alcohol. And I often don’t have the specific answer they want - because it is so often in the gray area. And only the person asking the question knows what’s going on under the issue. Today’s story is about a mom that got curious about her relationship with alcohol in her early 30s. As you hear her story, you will be inspired to take an honest assessment and just get curious about your relationship with alcohol. She called it “getting sober minded.”  Although I don’t drink - I have my own vices which we discuss. I joke about my love of the phone, cookie dough and TJMaxx. If I’m honest, I often use those to outsource my comfort. This isn’t an episode for moms that drink - this is an episode for all of us.  My favorite part is when Jenn shares about the benefits of operating in a sober mind. She reminds us that being present with our kids is worth the fight. Let’s lean into Jenn’s story together and be brave enough to hear what God is nudging us to do in response.  Don’t forget to check in our Jenn’s community called Sober Sis and utilize all of the fantastic resources that are helping thousands of women become sober-minded and enjoy this life to the fullest! In this episode we chat about:  Jenn’s journey with alcohol and finding a sober-minded lifeHow to pay attention to what God is saying to us directlyHow to get curious about areas of addiction in our livesHow to fight for presence with our families  00:00 Introduction and Connection 02:33 Early Years and Introduction to Social Drinking 05:46 The Influence of Mommy Wine Culture 07:41 Outsourcing Comfort and Dealing with Anxiety 09:44 Questioning the Relationship with Drinking 12:30 Understanding the Mindset and Motivations Behind Drinking 19:28 Questioning Your Relationship with Drinking 21:57 Introduction: Jenn's Journey of Sobriety 25:08 The Importance of Addressing the Root Cause 28:40 Taking the First Step: Sobriety Curiosity 33:28 Shifting Mindset: Gaining, Not Giving Up 39:11 The Power of Community in Sobriety 42:59 Personal Growth and Sobriety 45:07 Conclusion: Encouragement for Moms Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show:  Sober Sis Home Page - ​Happy Hour Survival Guide - Free Guide​21 Day Reset Challenge Sober Sis - Facebook ​Sober Sis - Instagram​​Sober Sis 2024 Retreat ​ Look Alive, Sis! by Jenn Kautsch (book) - Little Habits, Big Faith Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders community Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy July 4th! This week’s story features my friend, Stacey Morgan, who is an astronaut’s wife! Her life is truly fascinating. Her family is currently living in the Marshall Islands which is 5 hours south of Hawaii.  Stacey honestly shares the truth about loneliness. She has had to start over multiple times as a military spouse. I love her hard truth about loneliness: we have to make the first move. She also shares how her kids are thriving as they were uprooted from the cultural norm in Texas, and now live on an island with 1,200 people total. They are learning valuable life lessons about what’s most important. My favorite part is at the very end when she talks about her top learning as a mom of over 20 years. Her encouragement to “let go” was really timely for me. I am having trouble letting go of my oldest who is a rising senior. I need that reminder over and over again.  In this episode, we chat about: How to navigate marriage when you are both strong leadersHow to start over when you move into a new city (or island! :)Why community matters in motherhoodHow to make friends as an adult woman What to do when you’re deeply lonelyChapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 02:47 Moving to the Marshall Islands 05:58 Supporting a Spouse's Career 11:04 Living in a Small Community 15:01 Transition and Loneliness 23:57 Supporting Military Spouses and Moms 26:30 The Importance of Community for Military Families 31:16 MomCo: Supporting Military Moms 39:19 Lessons in Trust and Letting Go 44:28 The Power of Grace and Understanding in Parenting Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith Resources from today’s show: Stacey Morgan’s site  Stacey’s Instagram Stacey’s Book: The Astronaut’s Wife MomCo - Military Meetups How to start an online MomCo group Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders community Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If she wasn’t one of my best friends, I don’t know if I would believe this story. However, it is true and real and incredibly powerful. My friend, Kylie White, was fully healed from near blindness. Her story and her miracle has exploded my faith the last several years. It has given me courage to pray bigger prayers.  I will never be over what God did for Kylie. Even though I’ve heard this story many times, I heard even more details during this conversation which exploded my faith yet again. God is so good. I’m truly excited for us all to have this reminder today through Kylie’s story. My favorite part is hearing how she got to the miracle day. Listen closely as she shares the years leading up to her miracle. Lean into what God was pressing on her heart. And let’s lean into what God wants to say to you through her story. What is He asking you to release and surrender? What miracle do you believe is too far gone?  In this episode, we chat about: Kylie’s miracle story and healing How we can trust God and lean in when we don’t understand the full storyHow to parent the pain endured with adoptionHow to love our kids unconditionally  Don’t forget to share the Summer of Stories with your friends - so that they can also be reminded that: God is good. You are not alone. And He is with you during life’s hardest moments. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Catching Up 03:35 Adoption and Navigating Challenges 06:45 Parenting and Unconditional Love 09:40 Experiencing a Modern-Day Miracle 28:13 Asking for Healing 30:14 Miraculous Healing 35:23 Confirmation of Healing 39:26 Orphan Prevention and Untold 42:19 Lessons Learned as a Parent Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Pardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Become a Christian Parenting Legacy Builder Resources from today’s show: Kylie’s Instagram Kylie’s blog Untold - Nonprofit Kylie supports Father’s House - Bible study by Rachel Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to Week 3 of our Summer of Stories series! For the next 10 weeks, you will hear one powerful story after another. We are featuring 10 stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments. I need everyone to take a massive deep breath before listening. And listen to the entire episode, not just the first few minutes. This is not a political episode. This is a story of one incredible mom, Amy Ford, that chose to keep her baby boy after an unplanned pregnancy and the God-sized story that followed.  My favorite part is when she shares about her love for the women that walk with the shame of abortion. She is for all women and all stories. And she walks closely with women who have endured every part of the unplanned pregnancy journey.  I am praying deeply that this story reaches an untold number of women and heals their hearts in a special way. And that we may join together and support women with unplanned pregnancies in the way God would. That we would love them deeply.  Don't forget to share this episode with women in your community that need encouragement and healing around unplanned pregnancies. In this episode we chat about:  Amy’s unplanned pregnancy Amy’s encouragement for those who live with shame of abortionHow to create a safe and supportive church environment with unplanned pregnanciesHow to turn towards God in some of life’s biggest mistakes or struggles Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Amy's Family 03:34 The Love Box and Volunteer Opportunities 06:08 The Rejection from a Pastor and the Healing Journey 09:21 The Impact of Amy's Story on Her Son 14:35 Creating a Safe and Supportive Church Environment 19:28 Healing and Hope After Abortion 22:26 Creating Safe Spaces in Churches for Unexpected Pregnancies 26:34 Taking Small Steps of Obedience 29:15 Celebrating Women Who Turn Towards God Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Become a Christian Parenting donor Resources from today’s show: Amy Ford Embrace Grace A Bump In Life Love Box Support After Abortion Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

For our Summer of Stories, I got the pleasure of interviewing a dear friend Rachel Faulkner Brown about her incredibly hard and beautiful life. In the first half of this episode, we talk about her journey with losing two husbands and walking that grief journey twice. She shares so much wisdom for other widows as well as practical tips for all of us enduring life’s toughest pain. In the second half of our chat, Rachel bravely shares about their family’s most recent struggle - an eating disorder that quickly took a grip on her daughter. She provides invaluable insight and practical advice from the deeply painful journey they have walked. My favorite part of the interview is when she shares honestly about the shame we can feel as mothers. As she watched her daughter walk through the hardest season of her life - she was also faced with a choice to hold onto that control or release her to God. We all have these moments in parenting and we can learn so much from Rachel’s incredible faith journey. I’m so thrilled for you to get to know Rachel. She is a dear friend and a woman that has experienced God’s goodness throughout some of the deepest pain in her life. You will be inspired by her calling to pass on the love of God and hope to others’ in their darkest days. In this episode, we chat about: How to practically move forward when you lose your spouseHow to wrestle with God when horribly hard things happenHow to lean into God when life is upside downHow to love our kids when it’s hard and you must release controlHow to parent a child with an eating disorder Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 10:46 The Importance of Honesty and Community 30:28 The Need for Aggressive Treatment 39:07 The Healing Journey and Future Hope 48:17 Prayer and Encouragement for Mothers Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Never Alone Widows  Father's House Bible Study There is More podcast  Podcast with Rachel’s daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1 Podcast with Rachel’s daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1 Reverend Joanne Moody St. Teresa of Avila Quote Healing prayer - resource 1 Healing prayer - resource 2 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to week 1 of our Summer of Stories series! For the next 10 weeks, you will hear one powerful story after another. We are featuring 10 stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments. Today’s guest is my dear friend, Joy Phenix, who bravely shares her journey of losing her amazing son. Her story of loss and indescribable grief is so very hard to hear but oddly peaceful and sacred.  My favorite part is when she encourages us to be a student of others’ grief journey. Every single person grieves at different times and in different ways. We cannot judge our friends or family members on that journey. This takes patience and grace and understanding.  This episode is for anyone walking in grief - not just the loss of a child. All of us have seasons of tragedy and unthinkable hard times. We want to know how to trust God again and how to move forward in the midst of the pain. Joy will touch your heart in a profound way. I am deeply thankful for her willingness to share her story to help others.  In this episode we chat about:  How to endure the indescribable journey of losing a childHow we can help and support friends in their grief How to remember each person grieves differently and at unique timesHow to normalize talking about grief through the process  00:00 Introduction and Catching Up 09:16 The Power of Community in Times of Loss 15:30 Finding Hope and Healing Through Faith 28:25 Cherishing Memories and Finding Healing 34:38 Vulnerability and Trust in Difficult Times Enjoy! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Josh’s Celebration Service Joy’s Instagram Body Keeps The Score Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Comedian Michael Jr went from living in his car to one of the most influential and talented comedians in the country. In fact, he used to open the show for Jerry Seinfeld and went on to headline his own shows. He is now sharing the stage with his wife, Ebony, as they focus on strengthening marriages across the country. This engaging couple shares many great pieces of wisdom and insight during our episode, but I really enjoyed how they speak about conflict. It’s so easy to avoid conflict at all costs. They encourage us to utilize conflict for the greatness of marriage  My favorite part (or least favorite) was when Michael Jr. asked me to share honestly about a recent disagreement I had with Ron. He went through the list of the fruit of the Spirit to see how I was handling a specific situation. And I bombed his test. It was embarrassing, but really challenged me on how I handle conflict. I love their hearts for marriage. They have a passion to remind couples that marriage is GOOD and it does work. In this episode, we discuss: How easy it is to drift in marriage when kids are in the homeHow to keep your marriage a priority and intentionally connectHow to utilize conflict instead of avoiding it Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Family Background 04:04 Letting Go and Trusting God with Our Children 08:54 Faith as a Consistent and Visible Part of Family Life 23:53 Merging Talents to Help Couples Find Joy in Marriage 29:19 Revealing Areas of Freedom Through Conflict Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Funny How Marriage Works Assessment for your conflict resolution  Emotions Wheel Funny How Marriage Works Tour Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy almost Summer!! I am delighted to share the story of Sarah Harmeyer and her love for gathering neighbors. You will be so fascinated by her story of creating a table and setting out to have people over. Over time, she hosted thousands of people just one night at a time. She absolutely inspired me to get back out there and invite folks to my home.  You will be inspired and motivated and so very touched how God used Sarah’s life to start a movement called “Neighbor’s Table.” He took a nudge in her heart and kept expanding it across the country. My favorite part was at the end when we talked about her current living situation with her aging father. She is so tender and so gracious with his walk with Alzheimers. I pray that I handle my own parents with such care and compassion one day. In this episode we chat about:  How a simple dinner party created a movementWhy your neighbors need community What an invitation can do for an individualHow we can preach less and simply love moreHow to care for aging parents with compassion Chapters00:00 Introduction and Catching Up 10:01 Stories of Love and Connection Around the Table 22:59 Building Relationships with New Neighbors and Introducing Sarah's Dad 27:02 Caring for Aging Parents with Love and Compassion 30:53 Closing Remarks and Action Items Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Sarah’s Instagram Neighbor’s Table Invite Sarah to Speak Table Talk Questions - source Close To My Heart Kindness Diaries with Leon Leon Logothetis God’s Holy Spirit in Me kid’s devotional Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” —Matthew 28:19–20   We’ve spent this school year praying for our kids to be marked by the things of God. We’ve prayed that they live with integrity, confidence, generosity, endurance, and much more. But these are nothing more than admirable qualities if they aren’t used for God’s kingdom purposes.   Before Jesus ascended to heaven, he gave us our mission. He told us to go and make disciples, sharing the story of his grace and love.   The Great Commission is our central mission. The same is true for our kids.   We’re God’s Plan A for spreading the gospel. There’s no backup plan, there’s no contingency, and there’s nobody else to tag in for our spot.   But it all starts at home. It happens in the seemingly insignificant moments of reading Bible stories to our toddlers and the really hard places of pointing them to Jesus on the heels of their biggest mistakes and greatest obstacles.   Please let us never underestimate the significance of our jobs as moms and dads, discipling our kids to share the gospel to the next generation.   Let’s wrap up this school year by praying that our kids will be marked by the mission of Jesus, doing it with truth, discipline, purity, and every other characteristic of God we’ve prayed over them this year.   Lord, thank you for the gift of my children and the privilege of praying over them this school year. Please mark their lives with a determination to fulfill the mission you created for them before they were ever born. Give [name] the wisdom to pursue you every day and a spirit of urgency in following your plans for their life.  God’s word speaks: 1 Peter 2:9; Mark 16:15; 1 Peter 3:15; Ecclesiastes 12:13–14 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When our children hurt (emotionally or physically), we simply hurt. One of the hardest jobs as a parent is to discern when to step in and when to let them live through hard seasons. I am so thrilled to introduce you to my very own therapist, Dr. Cassie Reid.  Cassie has counseled me and my own children through many seasons. It’s taken me years to find a good fit and I am beyond thankful for her wisdom and direction for our family. It is not always clear if our kids are just being kids - or if they are really struggling internally.  Listen in as Cassie and I chat about the challenges that come our way as parents. She shares many practical recommendations for us parents.  My favorite part is when she talks about the expectations we have for our kids. She challenges us to look inward and really work on ourselves and our own healing journey. She shares how our unrealistic expectations can start to produce extra pressure and anxiety and how to look out for that scenario in our homes.  In this episode we chat about:  When to see a therapist or counselorWhy counseling is so important for families Two pieces of advice for parents that she wishes we all knew Chapters: 00:00 Introduction and Personal Connection 01:36 Dr. Cassie Reed's Background and Passion 08:35 Recognizing the Need for Professional Help 10:06 Finding Affordable Therapy Options 12:55 The Impact of Parental Anxiety on Children 14:36 Setting Boundaries and Recognizing Age-Appropriate Behavior 22:26 Setting Boundaries and Creating Space for Children 23:49 Managing Expectations and Apologizing to Children 26:19 The Impact of Technology on Children's Mental Health 27:10 Navigating Issues of Gender and Sexual Preferences as Christian Parents 29:04 Dr. Cassie Reid's Work in Spiritual Abuse Prevention and Healing Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: CassieReid.com Cassie’s Instagram Church Rehab by Dr. Cassie Reid Come Home God’s Holy Spirit in Me kid’s devotional My Daddy’s Hero Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, ‘Thus far the Lord has helped us.’” —1 Samuel 7:12 The Israelites were in desperate need of a victory against the Philistines. Just as they were convincing themselves it was a lost cause, Samuel cried out to God and received an answer in the form of deafening thunder that scared away the enemy and secured an Israelite victory. Orthodox battle move? No. God protecting his people? Absolutely. No sooner than they finished their victory lap, Samuel stopped everyone in their tracks to make a critical point. He grabbed a stone as a memorial and named it Ebenezer, translated as “the Lord has helped us to this point.” Samuel knew their battle win was significant from a tactical perspective, but he also knew the more significant win was the reminder that God had protected them in the past and he’d just done it again. Our kids need the same reminder today that Samuel gave way back then: The God who has taken care of us up to this point will do it again. He is faithful and trustworthy.  What are the Ebenezers in your family? Where do you need to start laying down stones as reminders to your family that God’s faithfulness in the past shows he’s trustworthy for the future?   Lord, remind us to always pass down the stories of your faithfulness. Mark [name] with a good memory of your provision, giving them confidence to trust your heart when they can’t see your hand. Help us to celebrate the places where you’ve given us victory, making a lasting memorial of your faithfulness for generations to come.   God’s word speaks: Deuteronomy 7:9; 2 Thessalonians 3:3; Lamentations 3:22–23; Psalm 86:15 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you are a parent, you know the feeling of just “making it through” each day. So often, we want more for our lives. However, we feel stuck and are not sure how to do that when there are children depending on us every day. My guest this week, Farrell Mason, shares about a time when she felt that her life was running her ragged. She decided to do something about how she lived her one precious life. She took action to create a more soulful life in the midst of raising six kids. Farrell Mason is a minister, a mom, a wife and a beautiful writer. She has a passion for standing with others in the midst of their hardest moments in life.   My favorite part is towards the end when Farrell offers very practical suggestions on how to love others well. She is so passionate about caring for yourself as a mom, but also leaning into simple ways we can care for our neighbors. You won’t feel guilt or more pressure to perform - you will feel seen and inspired to lean into more for your life. In this episode we chat about:  How to live this one life wellHow to push against busy and impossibly full schedulesHow to pay attention to what your soul craves How to help your hurting friends  Enjoy! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Farrell’s Site - Bread and Honey Farrell’s new book: Soulfull Come Home Chapters: 00:00 Introduction and Connection 09:50 Living a Full Life and the Importance of Time 16:22 Commitment to Intentional Living 32:21 Finding Hope in Difficult Times Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” —Philippians 2:3–4   We’re raising kids in a culture that basks in recognition and praise, making it difficult to strike the balance of teaching our kids to be confident in their God-given identity while also exuding a humble spirit. Humility is not ignoring their giftings, but it’s teaching them to be willing to use them in a way that draws attention to the Giver of the gift rather than the gift itself. Humility is also not a call to raise silent or passive kids. Rather, it’s teaching them a quiet and meek spirit before God.   Jesus is the perfect model of humility. He came to earth in the form of a baby and lived a blameless life so he could die on the cross and give us new life. He more than deserved recognition and acknowledgment for his heavenly status, yet he chose to demonstrate humility because of his commitment to the Father’s will and the larger gospel story. He was righteously indignant when necessary but gentle and loving in leading his flock.   We’re praying this week for our kids to humbly serve others, admitting their mistakes, and recognizing that all praise and glory belongs to the Lord as the giver of all good gifts (James 1:17). Let’s also ask the Lord to guide them in being passionate and outspoken when appropriate, but also disciplined enough to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger (James 1:19).   Lord, you’re the perfect model of living humbly while making a kingdom impact on those around you. Give [name] a spirit of humility and the desire to bring you glory, even when it comes with no acknowledgment. Help them to honor others above themselves and to live in your confidence so they don’t need praise or acceptance from others.   God’s word speaks: Ephesians 4:2; Romans 12:16; James 4:10; Colossians 3:12 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you have regrets as a parent? We all do! I have a long list myself. I thought it would be encouraging and super helpful for me to share just a few of my own regrets in the last 17 years of parenting. I asked Kari Kampakis to share her own regrets in this podcast episode.  I have always loved Kari’s relatable and authenticity as a writer, podcaster and speaker. When I read her encouragement for moms - I feel like she has read my mind. She has a real gift for walking with moms so that we feel so seen. When you encounter Kari, you feel uplifted and equipped but never condemned or shamed.  My favorite part is when she shares about how to love strong-willed children well. She shares a powerful story of how her husband approached her strong-willed daughter vs her approach. There’s such humility that pours from Kari when she speaks. It gives us all the permission to be honest about our mistakes. And to have the courage to pivot as we discover a better way.  In this episode we chat about:  Raising strong-willed kidsHow to decide if you should have another childHow to make health a priority in your home from the start 00:00 Introduction and Getting to Know Each Other 06:21 Parenting the Heart vs. Focusing on Behavior 13:05 Finding Joy in Every Season of Parenthood 29:39 Trusting God to Fill in the Gaps in Parenting 35:56 Delaying Cell Phone Use and Monitoring Social Media Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: KariKampakis.com Kari’s book: Love Her Well Kari’s book: More Than a Mom Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.” —1 Corinthians 9:24   The Christian life is more like a marathon than a sprint, requiring significant endurance if we’re going to make it through the obstacles we face along the way. From the day we accept Christ until we see him face-to-face, we’re continually building up endurance so we can best run the race set out for us.   Having endurance in the context of our faith means we’re always in training mode, getting ready for the hard places of discouragement and suffering that will challenge our readiness for the race. We build up our endurance practically by staying true to the basics: things like spending daily time with God, finding Christian community, memorizing Scripture, and seeking discipleship.   What a GIFT to have author and speaker (and track coach) Dorina Gilmore-Young on with us chatting about endurance. I absolutely loved her perspective as a widow, mom and coach - how endurance is something God produces in our kids through trials. We can pray for that process - that they may endure life’s hardships with Jesus as their strength.   Let’s challenge our kids to run well so they will hear Jesus say at the finish line, “Well done, my good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:23).   Lord, before you created even one of us, you set us apart for your purposes. Give [name] the endurance to run the race you have planned for their life. Help them to stay the course when they run up against obstacles along the way, reminding them of the importance of putting in the daily work so they are prepared for anything they face. God’s word speaks: Philippians 3:14; Romans 5:3–4; 2 Timothy 4:7; Hebrews 10:36 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp. Are you struggling with where your child should go to school? This common fear and worry can grip us all. We want so desperately to make the right choice for each of our kids. It can also be confusing when your friends all have different opinions on the matter or maybe your spouse is in disagreement with your plan.  You will feel extremely encouraged by today’s episode with Terry Ann Kelly. She has practical advice for these decisions as well as grounding truths to calm our hearts. She is a grandmother, wife and mom and has many years of experience with schools. As the founder of Students Standing Strong, she has seen first hand that God can do anything with any child and any school. My favorite part is the story she shares about her son at the end. It is so refreshing to hear a very personal example of how God can use each of our kids in the most powerful ways at school every day.  In this episode we chat about:  How to seek God in tough school decisionsHow to bring your faith into the public school settingHow to call your kiddos higher in loving their classmates Enjoy! Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Students Standing Strong Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” —1 Peter 4:10   As we wrap up the greatest commandment, we’re focused on how to love God with all of our strength. Contrary to how it sounds, loving God with all of our strength is not a reference to our physical strength. The Hebrew word used for strength in the context of the greatest commandment is me’od, which is translated as “much” or “very.” Loving God with all of our strength is loving God with our “much-ness.” It’s using our possessions, our time, our talents, our parenting, our volunteering—everything we’ve got—to love God and live for him. Said differently, wherever the Lord has planted you and with whatever resources he’s provided, use all your strength to love him smack-dab in the middle of it all. As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their strength, we’re praying that they use all of their party-planning skills, math aptitude, athleticism, and social media acumen for God’s greatest glory. It’s taking the seemingly small places in their life and asking the Lord to use it in every possible way for his bigger purposes. Spend time this week asking the Lord to use your kids’ gifts to bring God glory. Pray that he uses them for his greater purposes right where he has them, teaching them to love the Lord with all of their much-ness and strength. Lord, thank you for all the gifts and talents you’ve given our family. I pray that you will guide my children to use these gifts generously for your glory. With all of the much-ness you’ve given [name], remind them to serve those around them as they learn to love you with all of their strength.    God’s word speaks: Hebrews 13:16; Proverbs 11:24–25; Deuteronomy 16:17; Colossians 3:23 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp. It’s not often you get to interview a college kid about growing up as a Christian. The Stites are family friends of ours and a family we admire and respect so very much. I am often asking them for advice since they are ahead of the game by a few years.  Today’s episode is a chat with their son, Campbell, who is studying political science at Texas A&M University. He has always been a leader and I have absolutely loved watching God grow his faith during his first year in college. He’s making some wise choices that we can all learn from. My favorite part of the episode is when he encourages parents to get interested in their child's interests. He shares about how his mom invested in his interests and helped foster a super close mom/son relationship.  In this episode we discuss: How to make faith a priority in collegeThe power of friends and your circleHow to let boys have freedom vs controlling themThe gift of allowing your teens to fail Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp. Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” —2 Corinthians 10:5   As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their minds, we have to consider that our mind is made up of our thoughts. So, in order to love God with all of our minds, we have to think about what fills our minds and how it impacts the way we love God. Our thoughts are significant because they have the potential to grow our love for God or distract and pull us away from a relationship with him and his great plans for our life. The Enemy loves to get a hold of our thoughts and make us question God’s goodness and protection in our life. For our kids to love God with all of their minds, we’re praying that they “take captive” all the thoughts that are destructive, not instructive. This process of taking captive their thoughts is accomplished by knowing God’s word so that their thoughts are weighed against the truth of Scripture.  It also comes by considering what’s going into their minds and how that’s fueling (or lessening) their love for God. It’s praying that they evaluate the movies they watch, the music they listen to, and the voices they allow to speak into their lives.  Since our kids’ thoughts have the greatest impact on loving God with all of their minds, let’s take time to pray over their thoughts and ask God to help them take each one captive.  Lord, teach us to love you in all of the different areas of our life, including our minds. If our minds are made up of our thoughts, teach us to take captive our thoughts and bring them in line with your truth. Be with [name], helping them to guard what they allow into their minds so that it always honors you. God’s word speaks: Isaiah 26:3; Jeremiah 33:3; Colossians 3:2–3; 1 Peter 1:13 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What a treat to talk to Adrienne Camp about how she is trusting God with her kids.  Adrienne “Adie” Camp, a South African singer and songwriter, was the lead singer of the Christian rock band The Benjamin Gate before launching her solo career. She is married to fellow musician Jeremy Camp, whom she met on tour in 2002. They have been married since 2003 and have two daughters, Bella and Arie, and one son, Egan.  Throughout this entire episode, you will hear Adrienne’s heart to connect people in a very tangible way with Jesus. However, she acknowledges that we don’t always feel excited about that. Sometimes, we are sitting in a real place of doubt, frustration and disbelief. No matter where you are on your faith journey (or your kids) - I think you will feel so encouraged by Adrienne’s words and wisdom.  In this episode we discuss: The desire to protect our kids from mistakesThe real grief experienced when you launch a child Getting honest with God - all our feelings and emotions included doubt and anger Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: As For Me - Adrienne’s latest bible study on Psalms  Even Me - Adrienne’s book with her girls about their journey to Africa Adrienne Camp’s Instagram  Pardon the Mess episode with Jonathan and Peta Pitts Christian Parenting Store (15% off with coupon PODCAST2024) Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?” —Mark 8:36 Loving God with all of our soul sounds very important, but what exactly is our soul? Our soul lies deep down inside of us and is our very core. It’s the invisible part of us that connects us with God. It is where we are most at home, and it’s the most fundamental driver of who we are from the inside out. If you strip away all of our outward actions and how we choose to portray ourselves (or how others may define us), the soul is our truest self. To love the Lord with all of our soul, we’ve got to be faithful in private. We’ve got to be devoted to the things that drench our soul in Jesus and be willing to drop the things that don’t. It’s spending time in prayer confessing what’s in our soul, not just in our mind.  As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their souls this week, let’s pray that they learn to love him with the very core of who they are—not by what they intellectually believe about him, or how they serve him, or what they communicate to others by their faith, but truly learning to love Jesus from the core of their being.  Pray for the Lord to reveal the depths of their soul and teach them how to love him with all that they are.  Lord, we confess to spending a disproportionate amount of time worrying about our earthly bodies, usually at the expense of our soul. Please teach [name] how to love you from their very core, giving priority to the only part of us that will live eternally.  God’s word speaks: Psalm 119:81; Psalm 63:8; Deuteronomy 4:29; Matthew 10:28 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I am taking a guess that 100% of us are exhausted. And this is beyond the physically tired feeling. You all will love the encouragement and wisdom on today’s episode by Jess Connolly. I have always loved her teaching and preaching - because she balances compassion and truth so well. She doesn’t leave us sitting in the challenges - she provides biblical, practical and realistic ways we can move forward in this issue. This idea of burnout and an unsustainable pace is not new information. We know we are in it but are not sure why or how to stop it as parents? So what do we do? Tune in to this week’s podcast chat with Jess - you won’t feel shame - you will feel equipped and encouraged to do the hard work of rest. We all know our souls are crying for it. I was so absolutely amused at the start of our conversation when I asked her about her cold plunge obsession. Is anyone else into the idea of purposely jumping into ice cold water? She actually gives a pretty compelling case to try it. Jess’ story of emotional, physical and spiritual breakdownHow to tend to your soul and stop feeling so defeated How to break the cycle of surviving vs thriving How can we respond to God’s invitation to rest Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: JessConnolly.com Tired of Being Tired - Jess’ new book Raising Mentally Strong Kids Christian Parenting store (15% off with coupon PODCAST2024) Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” —Mark 12:30   Remember the lawyer who tried to trick Jesus by asking him to name the greatest commandment? (Lawyers, am I right?)   Jesus, knowing this guy’s antics, responded with, “Love God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” If we break it down, what does it look like to love God with all of our heart?   Our heart is not just critical to our health; it’s also the epicenter of our spiritual life. It’s central to our thoughts and actions, where we spend money, and even the words that come out of our mouths. When Jesus talks about loving God with all our heart, he’s referencing our emotions and decisions.  In order for us to love God with all of our hearts, we have to prioritize spending time with him and in his word. When we spend time with God, we start wanting to do the things that are pleasing to God and we care about the things that he cares about. Having time with our creator enables us to know what he wants for our lives, and we can’t help but pursue him and the things he values and wants for our families.   Let’s pray this week that our kids learn to love God with all of their hearts, beginning with prioritizing time with him and pursuing him in all that they do.   Lord, teach us to show our love for you, not just with our words, but with our lifestyle. Lead [name] to prioritize time in your word and learn to pursue you in all that they do. Remind us that loving you means also loving our neighbor. Make us aware of the needs we can meet around us.   God’s word speaks: 1 John 4:7–8; 1 Corinthians 13:13; John 13:34; 1 John 4:19 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

There’s not a day that goes by that I do not hear these same sentiments from a mom. And I have been there many times. I feel so lost.I don’t know what to do with my life.I feel overlooked and unseen.I feel like I don’t dream or use my gifts. In this episode, I get the pleasure of having a real life heart chat with my friend (and my Life Plan Coach) Brooke Warnock. She shares about her journey of raising 5 kids on a ranch - while wanting to use her unique gifts for the Lord. It can be a huge struggle for all of us. My favorite part is how honest she is about the struggle of using your gifts and raising kids. She will make you feel so seen as she shares her journey. I pray you feel so very encouraged that this is not the end of your story.  In some ways, the motherhood years are just the beginning. If you don’t have your exact calling and purpose figured out - do not feel discouraged. I pray you never forget that God will use every bit of you and your giftings to raise those kids and build your home.  In this episode we discuss:  What to do when you feel trapped and unseen at homeHow to bring your gifts and talents into your home, not just your vocationHow to dream and redefine your life while embracing the seasons of parenting What is wrong? What is right? What is confused? What is missing? Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: BrookeWarnock.com Brooke’s free assessment LifePlan with Brooke Paterson LifePlan Lost Valley Ranch If Gathering Blue Zones Documentary Raising Mentally Strong Kids Our Scripture Affirmation Cards are the perfect gifts for your kid’s Easter Baskets! Brooke’s challenge to ask these questions: What is wrong? What is right? What is confusing? What is missing? Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” —Galatians 5:22–23  As we celebrate Easter, we have the opportunity to pray that the power of the cross impacts every area of our kids’ lives. It is an incredible assurance knowing that, by accepting Jesus, our kids have a new eternal destination. But we’re also praying for a daily life transformation. When our kids become Christians, we should begin looking for (and hopefully seeing) fruit in their lives. Jesus said those who follow him will produce spiritual fruit, and it’s by this fruit you will know them (Matthew 7:20). In Galatians, Paul describes some attributes of a life without Christ, including anger, idolatry, jealousy, selfishness, impurity, and strife. In contrast, with Christ we start to see the spiritual fruit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control. Thankfully, this is not simply a checklist of things we’re constantly trying to achieve. Instead, it’s produced by allowing the Holy Spirit to work within us. Without even trying, our kids will produce fruit that’s visible to the world around them. This fruit can either be produced by the Holy Spirit or produced by their own spirit. Our prayer is that our kids will submit to the Holy Spirit’s leadership, resulting in less of their own fruit and more of his. This week, let’s pray that Easter Sunday impacts the way our kids live on Monday and that they produce fruit that leads others to trust Jesus and his great sacrifice at the cross. He is risen! He is risen indeed! Lord, thank you for your sacrifice at the cross. Allow our gratitude for the significance of Easter to impact how we live every day. Grow our kids in obedience and holiness, naturally leading them to produce spiritual fruit. Help [name] to submit to your Holy Spirit in both the small and big ways, making their life a clearer reflection of you. God’s word speaks:  Matthew 7:17–18; Romans 8:6; Ephesians 4:1–3; Romans 15:13 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

As soon as I heard about Jenna’s passion for JOY in the home - I knew I wanted to have her on the podcast. Parenting is hard, but there is a way to still bring joy into the everyday messes of motherhood.  I absolutely loved her encouragement on how to get intentional about redirecting our attitudes, conversations and outlook to one that is joy. She reminds us we do have control of our mind - and we can reframe how we see all the tiny annoyances and messes. This doesn’t mean we never get down or get honest with the hard - it’s just an encouragement to not let negativity and frustration ruin some very special years as a mom. My kids would tell you I’m quite moody, but I do see the difference in our home when I find the good and let go of the tiny frustrations. My mood really impacts the home I’ve often called myself the CMO - Chief Mood Officer. Do you sense that your mood can often set the tone and even help redirect to joy? My favorite part is when we talk about community. Are you surrounding yourself with other parents that only complain? What can you do in those moments when everyone is complaining about their kids?  In this episode we discuss: Jenna’s journey with postpartum depressionHow to find the good and joy in the everyday (even when it’s hard)Practical ways to bring fun and joy into the mess  Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Jenna’s site Jenna’s podcast Listener Kids YouTube Channel Register for Camp WinShape Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What a GIFT to have my dear friend Cari Trotter to pray for us this week about the armor of God. I was so incredibly blessed by our time and needed the chat and prayer myself. “Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” —Ephesians 6:11–12   Most of us don’t spend a lot of time contemplating how to fight against the devil’s schemes, but Scripture does. Thankfully, Jesus has already won our ultimate battle by his death on the cross and resurrection from the grave. But, even then, there will still be trouble in this world because we have a real Enemy who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10).   As we face the visible (and often invisible) battles each day, Satan’s success hinges on catching us unprepared and with our guard down. Let’s pray that our kids are battle-ready by wearing the armor of God, as seen in Ephesians 6:13–17: The belt of truth: Pray that God’s truth will defeat the enemy’s lies in their lives.The breastplate of righteousness: Pray that they withstand attacks of impurity and wrongdoing by clinging to righteousness.Feet fitted with the gospel of peace: Pray for a willingness to go and share the gospel.The shield of faith: Pray for protection from doubt, fear, and anxiety.The helmet of salvation: Pray for a mind controlled by God.The sword of the Spirit: Pray that God’s word is their offense, knowing it’s sharper than any sword.  Lord, the battles waged against our kids will be difficult and often unseen. Help them to be ready for anything they face through your protection and power. Mark [name] with a readiness that only comes from you. Prepare them with every tool necessary for victory in your name. God’s word speaks: Ephesians 6:13–17; 1 Thessalonians 5:6; 1 Peter 5:8; 1 Corinthians 16:13 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you know Carlos Whittaker, you love him. I have long admired his work in the world. He is honest, brave, vulnerable and simply loves walking with people. I find myself frustrated with the evangelical world when I see such divisiveness around tough topics and a dogmatic stance on every issue. Carlos encourages us that it’s possible to hold your belief and disagree with others in a way that draws people in. My favorite part is when we talk about his approach to parenting. His desire is that we have more conversations of hope than conversations of despair. This was a good caution for all of us - as we see so much in our culture that causes stress and worry.  In this episode, we also discuss: How to walk with people not stand on issues How to raise less self-righteous kids that really see peopleHow to model kindness and create empathy in our kidsHow to raise little world changers Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Carlos’ Instagram Get Your Hope Up - Carlos’ new devotional for kids Learn more about WinShape Camps! Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” —1 Peter 1:6–7   The final stage in gold production is refinement, the process of using heat to remove impurities from metal. After the gold is refined, only the most valuable qualities remain because the impurities and lesser qualities have been eliminated.   Scripture says that God is refining us. Even though we’re created in his exact image, we are free-willed human beings riddled with sin and impurities that don’t line up with who we were created to be. Just as the refinement of gold takes place in the heat of fire, refinement in our own lives often happens in the “furnace of affliction” (Isaiah 48:10).   As parents, we want to keep our kids from the hard places, so we find ourselves stepping in when they face difficulties. But what if God is working most significantly in the hard places in their lives? What if changing their circumstances prevents God from changing their heart?   As we’re praying for our kids to be marked by refinement, let’s not ask God to remove their obstacles but rather to remove their impurities. Let’s pray that when the heat intensifies, our kids learn to trust that the One who allows the fire will also bring them through it.   Lord, you refine us so that we are cleansed from unrighteousness and become a purer version of who you created us to be. We ask you to take all of the difficulties and trials that [name] will face and use them as an opportunity to see a clearer picture of you. Thank you for loving us too much to leave us as we are. Refine us for your glory.    God’s word speaks: 1 Peter 1:6–7; Zechariah 13:9; Romans 8:18; Job 23:10 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I am still thinking about this episode and this thought-provoking conversation with Jen Wilkin. I wish I could bribe every single one of you (and your spouse and small group) to listen to this episode. Jen is a self-taught theologian that speaks about the Bible and Christianity in a way that we can all understand.  I believe you will be motivated to dive into your Bible and engage in more conversations about it. She challenges us to go beyond the one-way conversation that is Sunday morning and sermons. I learned so much from her breakdown of common misconceptions about faith and theology.  My favorite part is towards the end during our discussion on parenting and faith. Her answers gave me some freedom and a sigh of relief. She also gave some very practical ways we can start the conversation of faith and Jesus with our little ones. In this episode, we discuss: What is theology and Bible literacy and why is it importantWhat is the benefit of learning the Bible for ourselves Why community and conversations propel us faster and furtherWhy it’s crucial to model faith conversations for our kids Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Jen Wilkin’s site Jen’s podcast Women of the Word You are a Theologian Register for Camp WinShape Our brand-new Scripture Affirmation Cards Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.’” —Matthew 16:24–25   “I Surrender All” is a classic hymn that gained notoriety when Rev. Billy Graham began using it as the invitation song during his revivals. The words have such a great message for walking with Jesus:   All to Jesus I surrender, all to him I freely give; I will ever love and trust him, in his presence daily live. I surrender all, I surrender all, All to thee, my blessed Savior, I surrender all.   Surrender is the antithesis of trying to “work” our way into a right relationship with God. A surrendered life allows the Spirit of God to enter into us, shaping us into something greater than we could be on our own.    The first and most significant act of surrender we can pray over our kids’ is their choice to surrender to the lordship of Christ by accepting Jesus as their savior. But, even after our kids have accepted Christ, we can pray that they surrender their words, plans, dreams, finances, and relationships to the Lord.  Pray for our kids to have the discipline to surrender all they are to the Lord each day, committing to live in a way that’s pleasing and brings him glory.  Lord, you become more when we become less. Please guide [name] to accept you as their Savior and surrender their lives to your glory. Help them know that surrendering to you is a lifelong process as they trust you with their burdens, fears, dreams, and aspirations.   God’s word speaks: Philippians 2:13; James 4:7; John 3:30; Psalm 32:8 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you ever get overwhelmed with how to talk to your young kids about hard topics? I have been there. And sometimes, I actually disengage or ignore important topics because it feels too hard. I don’t want to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Diversity is one of those topics that matters. It matters to God and it matters to me. Trillia Newbell is the perfect guest for this conversation. She was looking for a resource to guide her discussions with our own kids and couldn’t find it. So, she wrote “God’s Very Good Idea” to center the discussion of diversity around the gospel.  In this chat, we also discuss another hard topic with our kids -  bullying and loneliness. We talk about the importance of friendship for our kids and how we can turn our kids to Jesus in these moments. My favorite part is when Trillia reminds us that the teaching is coming. Either culture is going to teach our kids or we need to get ahead of that messaging. It’s so very important that we frame tough topics with a biblical point of view and Trilia helps us do that so well. In this episode, we discuss: How to teach our kids about diversity from a biblical perspective How to discern between bullying and unkindness How to invite God into your loneliness   Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Resources from today’s show: Jesus and the Gift of Friendship - Trillia’s new book God’s Very Good Idea (and other books) by Trillia Connect with Trillia Newbell Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” —Proverbs 16:9 NLT We just don’t know what we don’t know. History gives us some pretty funny stories of people who tried to predict the future but got it embarrassingly wrong. One great example is from 1962, when a record executive told the Beatles they “have no future in show business” because four-piece groups with guitars are a thing of the past.  Oops. The only thing we can be certain about this side of heaven is that our lives are going to be uncertain. We don’t know that the next year holds for us or our kids.  But God does. In the middle of uncertainty for Joshua, God reminded him that “every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given to you” (Joshua 1:3 ESV). The message to Joshua is the same message for us: with God directing our steps, not even one of them is unexpected or without purpose to the One who authors them all. This week, we’re praying for our kids to understand that what’s uncertain to them is anything but unexpected or unplanned to God. Knowing that, we can put our trust in the One who not only knows the future but also writes it. Lord, you don’t just know what the future holds, you are the future. Help [name] to stand firm in the face of uncertainty, knowing that you determine their steps and, in doing so, go before and behind them with power and authority over all things. We don’t know what we don’t know—but you do.  God’s word speaks: Romans 8:28; Philippians 1:6; Isaiah 45:2; Proverbs 3:6 Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I have long admired Laney Rene online and was so thrilled to get a chance to know her through this interview. She is beyond her years in wisdom and her faith has always inspired me. She’s a young mom so those of you with littles will definitely relate to our episode. She shares so tenderly about the loss of her son and how she experienced God in a new way through her pain. So many of you have gone through or are enduring tremendous pain. Painful parts of our story can feel so very crushing and devastating. So, how do we choose hope over despair? I believe Laney Rene’s story will encourage you. My favorite part is when she talks about when you know that God is real. And what to do when you doubt that he is real or that he is actually speaking to you.  I pray you will feel so very seen and loved through this conversation about how much God loves his daughters.  During this episode, we discuss: How to allow God into the most painful parts of your lifeHow to choose hope over despair How to discover how much Jesus truly loves you and sees you as his own child   Connect with Pardon The Mess: Christian Parenting Pardon The Mess  Courtney DeFeo Our Sponsors: * Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/MESS Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy