Empowered to Connect Podcast

After two decades in child welfare and trauma work, Amanda Purvis has a hard-won answer to how people stay in this work: put down the role of the healer and show up whole. She and Jesse talk about the weight of translating brain science into a formula, why systems change when people show up as whole people, and how modeling messing up and keeping boundaries sustains us. Amanda closes with the caregiver resiliency framework her team uses at All God's Children International. Key Takeaways Believing we're the healer puts weight on us that isn't ours to carry. Being attuned to someone's journey differs from being responsible for it. Systems are made up of people. Showing up whole, and seeing the people in front of us as whole, is one of the most revolutionary ways to change a system. Lasting in hard work takes safe people, room to feel the anger and unfairness, boundaries, and the freedom to mess up and keep going. Guest Bio & Links Amanda Purvis leads the global impact team at All God's Children International, an organization that restores children who are alone to their families. Before that, she spent about eight years on the outreach team at the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development and helped bring TBRI to Colorado, and she's a foster and adoptive mom. Website: All God's Children International Social: Amanda on Instagram AGCI on Instagram AGCI on Facebook AGCI on TikTok Resources Mentioned All God's Children International Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development Find Us Here ETC Shopify ETC Newsletter signup ETC Instagram ETC Facebook ETC YouTube ETC LinkedIn Chapters (00:00:00) - Introduction and Welcome(00:01:00) - Meet Amanda Purvis and Her Journey into Child Welfare(00:02:26) - AGCI's Shift to Family Preservation(00:03:47) - Discovering TBRI and Early Integration(00:07:15) - Redefining Success as a Parent(00:15:36) - What Keeps Amanda in This Work(00:20:30) - The Weight of Being a Translator of TBRI(00:25:33) - The Danger of Caregivers as Healers(00:28:35) - Children's Agency and Generational Shifts(00:34:40) - The Chick-fil-A Story and Family Dynamics(00:38:40) - Applying Principles at AGCI: Systems and Reunification(00:43:33) - Practicing Values at Home vs. Work(00:48:42) - Being Steeped in What Matters to Your Kids(00:51:58) - Modeling Resiliency and Self-Grace(00:56:27) - Advice for Sustaining This Work Long-Term(00:59:34) - Caregiver Resiliency Framework and Closing Thoughts

What if the trust we struggle to give, to God, to people, even to ourselves, traces back to how our earliest needs were met? Counselor, author, and trainer Melinda Cathey joins Jesse to talk about how attachment shapes our ability to trust, why caregivers often have to start with their own stories, and what a corrective experience looks like for a child who has experienced stress, trauma, and adversity. This episode discusses faith openly: Melinda shares her Christian perspective and how attachment connects to trusting God, so it's a thoughtful, faith-forward conversation for anyone who loves a child who struggles to trust, or who has wrestled with trust themselves. Key Takeaways Belief and trust are different things. Belief is cognitive (do I think you're telling the truth?), while trust is relational and only grows through experience with someone who has proven safe. The four attachment styles (Secure, Anxious Avoidant, Anxious Ambivalent, and Disorganized) shape how we relate to people and, for many, how we picture God. Change starts with awareness, then picking one skill to work on with a friend or therapist. Children who have experienced trauma need corrective experiences, not just corrected behavior. Caregivers do this work best when they've looked honestly at their own wounds first. Timestamped Outline 00:00 – Introduction: meet Melinda Cathey 00:01 – Moving to Russia in 1992 and co-founding a transitional care program for young adults aging out of orphanages 00:04 – The 10 to 15 percent of young adults she couldn't reach 00:05 – Discovering Dr. Karen Purvis and TBRI 00:11 – Why Melinda wrote Deeper Than Belief 00:12 – Belief vs. trust 00:16 – Faith and psychology: what each side gets wrong 00:22 – Why healing starts with the caregiver 00:27 – The attachment cycle and the four attachment styles 00:40 – Corrective experiences for kids with hard beginnings 00:45 – Dependency by design 00:49 – Changing long-held patterns: awareness, "lights on," and picking one skill 00:53 – An invitation for those with church wounds 01:00 – Prayer and therapy: both/and 01:06 – Advice for parents and pastors sharing faith with children who have experienced trauma 01:09 – Final thoughts and wrap-up Guest Bio & Links Melinda Cathey is a counselor, trainer, and author of Deeper Than Belief. After moving to Russia as a missionary in 1992, she co-founded The Harbor, a transitional care program for young adults aging out of orphanages, and now trains caregivers and ministry partners around the world. Website: Melinda Cathey at Orphanos Resources Mentioned Deeper Than Belief by Melinda Cathey (from the publisher, Kirk House Publishers) Deeper Than Belief on Amazon (paperback) Deeper Than Belief on Amazon Kindle (e-book) Orphanos missions Chapters (00:00:00) - Introduction and welcome(00:00:48) - Melinda's background: mission work in Russia(00:01:44) - Building a program for aging-out orphans(00:04:36) - The stubborn 10-15% and seeking answers(00:05:47) - Discovering TBRI and personal transformation(00:08:49) - Training mission partners globally(00:09:58) - Writing the book Deeper Than Belief(00:12:37) - Belief vs. trust: a key distinction(00:16:33) - Why Christians pit psychology against faith(00:21:04) - Starting with wounded caregivers first(00:27:11) - Unpacking the attachment cycle(00:31:08) - Secure attachment as a metaphor for God's love(00:33:03) - Avoidant, ambivalent, and disorganized attachment(00:39:48) - Reaching the hardest kids through trust and corrective experience(00:45:22) - Dependency on God by design(00:48:42) - Starting your own healing: awareness first(00:53:56) - Spiritual invitation for the wounded(00:58:28) - Perfect love casting out fear(01:00:56) - Balancing prayer with practical help(01:06:38) - Advice for parents and pastors on faith and trauma(01:09:20) - Closing thoughts and gratitude

FASD specialist and adoptive mom Sandra Flach joins Jesse to break down fetal alcohol spectrum disorder: what it actually is, why it hides behind behavior nobody understands, and why it's one of the most common and least discussed disabilities in foster care and adoption. Sandra shares her own family's diagnosis journey and the accommodations-based approach that finally helped her understand her sons instead of just managing their behavior. It's a conversation for anyone parenting a child whose brain might be working differently than expected, diagnosed or not. Sandra Flach is co-founder of Justice for Orphans and an adoptive and kinship parent of six. After her own sons were diagnosed with fetal alcohol syndrome, she became a national voice on FASD, offering training, coaching, and a peer support community for foster and adoptive families. Website: Justice for Orphans: FASD Training & Support Key Takeaways FASD is far more common than most people realize (one in twenty people prenatally exposed to alcohol, up to seventy percent of kids in foster care), yet true diagnosis is rare because doctors are trained to look for facial features present in fewer than ten percent of cases. FASD symptoms overlap heavily with trauma and can look like willful defiance, but the brain difference is real: what looks like "won't" is usually "can't," especially around executive function, auditory processing, and daily living skills. The path forward is accommodation, not consequence: understanding a child's specific struggles (memory, impulse control, sensory processing) and adjusting expectations the same way we already do for visible disabilities. Timestamped Outline 00:00 – Introduction: meet Sandra Flach, adoptive and kinship mom, FASD specialist and advocate 00:01 – FASD 101: how common it actually is, and why it's called an invisible disability 00:08 – Getting a diagnosis: who can diagnose FASD, and why so few doctors do 00:13 – Why the standard diagnostic criteria miss 90% of cases 00:19 – Not a straight line: the "scribble" and FASD's scattered developmental profile 00:28 – Why it's not that they won't, it's that they can't: executive function and the brain 00:36 – The neurobehavioral approach: accommodations instead of consequences 00:40 – "A child with brain damage": the reframe that changed how Sandra saw her sons 00:46 – Grief, interdependence, and redefining what success looks like 00:52 – Untangling shame, for parents, kids, and birth parents 01:03 – The long view: daily living skills, connection, and "not yet" instead of "never" 01:07 – Where to find Sandra: her support group, training, podcast, and a free gift Resources Mentioned Justice for Orphans: FASD Training & Support Hope Community (Sandra's online FASD support group) The Adoption & Foster Care Journey podcast Sandra Flach's site (Soul Care Saturday devotional and free breath prayers download) Call to Action (CTA) ETC Shopify ETC Newsletter signup ETC Instagram ETC Facebook Chapters (00:00:00) - Introduction and Sandra's Background(00:01:46) - What Is Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder(00:03:30) - Sandra's Family Journey to Diagnosis(00:07:57) - Challenges Getting an FASD Diagnosis(00:10:36) - Alcohol as a Teratogen and Whole-Body Effects(00:12:58) - Diagnosis Barriers and Facial Features Myth(00:14:17) - Navigating Diagnosis Without Birth History(00:18:48) - Developmental Gaps and Scattered Abilities(00:26:22) - Coping Strategies and Stress Capacity(00:28:21) - Executive Function and Misunderstood Behavior(00:30:28) - Communication Challenges and Real-Life Examples(00:33:55) - Untangling Trauma vs FASD Symptoms(00:35:54) - Accommodations as a Neurobehavioral Approach(00:39:36) - Seeing Brain Differences Instead of Bad Behavior(00:42:19) - Adults with FASD and Lifelong Accommodations(00:44:17) - Grieving Expectations and Celebrating the Child(00:47:58) - Community, Support Groups, and Celebrating Wins(00:52:04) - Addressing Shame and Building Acceptance(00:57:38) - Dispelling Shame Around Alcohol and Pregnancy(01:03:16) - Long-Term Goals and the Power of Connection(01:06:58) - Closing Resources and Farewell

What does open adoption actually mean, and what happens when fear gets in the way of staying connected? Annie Iverson, adoptive mom of four and creator of Write It & Remember It, joins us to talk honestly about openness, boundaries, and the small, sustainable habits that keep birth family connections alive. Episode Bullets Openness lives on a spectrum, from a card a few times a year to regular visits. There's no single "right" version of it. Three common misconceptions about open adoption: it means co-parenting, it's all or nothing, and it's mainly for the birth mom (it's really for the child). Keeping the child at the center means letting their questions, not the adults' comfort, drive the connection. A simple four-times-a-year rhythm (birthdays, a holiday, Birth Mother's Day, and one more) helps families stay consistent without overthinking it. "Something is better than nothing": an imperfect photo or a short text still counts as connection. Fear, of saying the wrong thing, of being judged, is often the biggest barrier, not logistics. If contact has faded or gone quiet, it's never too late to reach back out through the agency. Annie created Cards That Connect and the Birthday Interview Cards to make staying in touch simple and sustainable for other families. Resources Mentioned Write It & Remember It — Cards That Connect + Birthday Interview Cards Birthday Interview Cards & Book Digital Cards That Connect Free Guide: Keeping the Connection After Placement (PDF) Annie on Instagram Promo code: CONNECT20 for 20% off (Annie's gift to ETC listeners) Timestamps 00:03:29 — What "openness" really means 00:07:39 — Three misconceptions about open adoption 00:16:20 — Keeping the child at the center (the birth mom & shoe-size story) 00:21:43 — The four-times-a-year rhythm for staying consistent 00:22:52 — "Something is better than nothing" 00:32:18 — Fear as the biggest obstacle to staying connected 00:34:06 — What to do when contact has faded 00:41:52 — Letting go of the "hero" narrative If this episode encouraged you, share it with another parent who needs to hear it. For more support on connected, trauma-informed parenting, check out our Connecting Practices Handbook and the Cultivate Connection course. Chapters (00:00:00) - Annie Iverson on Empowered to Connect(00:01:45) - What is an Open Adoption?(00:03:04) - What Does Open Adoption Mean?(00:04:42) - Open adoption and biological family(00:07:40) - 3 Main misconceptions about Open Adoption(00:11:29) - What Kind of Contact Should Birthmother Have With Her Child?(00:16:18) - Open Adoption: Keeping the Child at the Center(00:20:21) - How to Keep the Open Adoption Relationship(00:25:52) - The Birth Mother's Cards(00:29:13) - Birth Mother Cards!(00:31:55) - Open Adoption: The Challenges(00:39:21) - Open Adoption: When Your Daughter Gives Up Her Story

If bedtime in your house feels like a nightly negotiation, or you're the one lying in the dark at 2 a.m. wondering why nothing seems to work, this conversation is for you. Pediatric sleep consultant Allison Ezell spent years stuck between a sleep doctor telling her to sleep train and a TBRI therapist affirming the trauma-informed parenting she knew her son needed, unable to find anyone who could bridge the two. She eventually became the person she needed, and she's bringing that hard-won wisdom to us today. What We Cover in This Episode The two building blocks of sleep science, sleep associations and sleep pressure, and why understanding sleep associations alone resolves most of the sleep struggles Allison sees. The difference between "putting a child to sleep" and "putting a child to bed," and why that distinction matters most for kids who wake in the middle of the night. A practical bedtime routine built around what a body actually needs to fall asleep: sensory input earlier in the evening, a warm bath or shower, real connection, and a small snack. How to build felt safety around bedtime fears through repeated, low-pressure exposure, and a gradual pullback method for weaning off sleep associations without a jarring overnight switch. A consistent, scripted response for middle-of-the-night wake-ups, plus the red flags (frequent waking, restless legs, long sleep onset, excessive daytime sleepiness) that mean it's time to talk to a doctor. Resources Mentioned Dwell Pediatric Sleep Allison Ezell on Instagram (@dwellpediatricsleep) Timestamps 00:00:37 — Allison's story: years of sleeplessness with her son, and how she became a pediatric sleep consultant 00:05:03 — The two big buckets: trouble falling asleep vs. trouble staying asleep 00:08:01 — Sleep science 101: sleep associations, explained through "the pillow" 00:11:09 — "For a lot of parents, they are the pillow": why parents become the sleep association 00:13:36 — Building a child's confidence and tolerance for separation 00:20:35 — Why temperament and history change how a child responds to sleep 00:22:45 — Sleep pressure, naps, and finding the right wake windows 00:30:36 — What has to happen in the body to fall asleep: heart rate and body temperature 00:33:07 — Building a bedtime routine: sensory input, bath or shower, connection, snack 00:41:37 — Creating felt safety around bedtime fears through repeated exposure 00:47:52 — The gradual pullback: weaning off unsustainable sleep associations 00:53:07 — The scripted response for middle-of-the-night wake-ups 00:55:16 — Red flags that mean it's time to talk to a doctor 00:59:47 — Allison's closing message: it's not selfish to want to fix your family's sleep Connect Line Have a question or topic you'd like us to cover? Send it to [email protected] Chapters (00:00:00) - Empowered to Connect: Everything Sleep(00:00:45) - What a Sleep Consultant Can Help You(00:05:00) - How to Get Your Child to Fall asleep(00:08:05) - Sleep Science for Adopted Kids(00:09:19) - Sleep Associations and Sleep Pressure(00:14:50) - How to Sleep Well With Your Child(00:22:49) - How to Raise a Sleepy Child(00:27:04) - How to Establish a Sleep Schedule for Foster Kids(00:30:40) - The Science of Falling asleep(00:31:18) - Sleep Aid for Kids(00:35:56) - How to Have a Good Bedtime(00:41:50) - How to Put Your Child to Sleep(00:47:11) - Waking Up in the Night(00:51:42) - How to Talk Your Child Out of Night Fever(00:54:52) - Signs of Insomnia in Parents(00:59:28) - How to Sleep Your Child

What if the parent report card you've been grading yourself on this whole time was never actually yours to fill out? Episode summary bullets: Nicole Barlow, longtime foster and adoptive mom and one of our Cultivate Connection facilitators, shares how she went from feeling like a "rockstar" foster parent to realizing she was in way over her head. Why the peer-to-peer model at the heart of Cultivate Connection matters: none of us are exempt from putting these tools into practice in our own homes. The weight of being watched. Nicole opens up about neighbors, strangers, and offhand comments that shaped how she saw her own parenting. How Nicole's understanding of Scripture around obedience and discipline shifted over time (a perspective she shares from her own faith journey). Redefining success: from "my kids are compliant" to "does my adult child still call me, even from a hard place?" Why a compliant kid isn't always a regulated kid, and what Nicole wishes she'd noticed sooner in her own home. Dysregulation isn't disobedience: a look at fight, flight, freeze, and fawn, and why repair matters more than perfection. Nicole and Jesse's honest conversation about social media, comparison, and the images of parenting we quietly measure ourselves against. Nicole's closing encouragement for any parent white-knuckling their way through this season: "It's not yours to carry." Resources mentioned: Cultivate Connection On-Demand course: https://empoweredtoconnect.shop/products/cultivate-connection-on-demand Connecting Practices Handbook: https://empowered-to-connect.myshopify.com/products/connecting-practices-handbook-ebook-spiral Timestamps: 00:00 – Meet Nicole Barlow and her foster and adoptive journey 09:53 – From "I've got this" to feeling completely in over her head 18:13 – Faith, obedience, and the pressure of what other people think 26:31 – What "successful mom" used to mean to Nicole, and what changed 33:08 – Why her most compliant kid taught her the most about trauma 39:07 – Redefining success as relationship, not response 48:36 – Nicole's word for any parent white-knuckling it right now Connect line: Find more trauma-informed parenting tools and connect with our community at http://empoweredtoconnect.org or follow along on Instagram @‌empoweredtoconnect. Chapters (00:00:05) - Empowered to Connect: Nicole Barlow on Foster Parents(00:03:22) - How to Train the Trainer(00:10:07) - Coming soon: Learning to Love Yourself(00:10:31) - What Made You Feel Bad About Your Parenting?(00:19:21) - Anglicans on Parenting(00:26:46) - Paula on Being a Successful Parent(00:35:59) - Fight or Flight: Dysregulation and How to Support It(00:39:10) - What Does That Look Like to Be a Successful Mom?(00:41:20) - "So Much of Success Is Staked on Connection With My Child(00:48:38) - It's Not Your Parents' Report Card

Ever notice how a bedtime standoff, a backtalk moment, or a flat-out refusal can turn into you against your kid? Jesse sits down with Mo & Tona Ottinger for an honest look at what happens when parenting starts to feel like a competition, and why "winning" a moment can quietly cost you the relationship. This one includes real, unfiltered stories (including a New Year's Eve bedtime battle that's now family legend) and a simple mindset shift that changes how you handle the next hard moment. What we cover in this episode Why parenting can start to feel like you're on opposite sides of the net from your own kid, and how to get back on the same team The difference between winning an interaction and being "rightly related," and why the second one matters more long term A real, unfiltered bedtime story about doubling down that went sideways (and the do-over that followed) What to do when your expectations and your child's needs are out of sync, especially with kids who struggle with big behaviors A simple practice for slowing the moment down mid-conflict so you can respond instead of react Resources mentioned Cultivate Connection On Demand: ETC's parenting course, referenced for its "before, during, and after" framework Connect with us Have a question or topic you'd like us to cover? Send your idea to [email protected] Chapters (00:00:00) - The Risk of Winning in Parenting(00:05:49) - On Winning and Losing(00:09:15) - What Does It Look Like to Support a Child's Bedtime Sleep(00:15:07) - How to Be Right All the Time with Your Child(00:17:52) - How To Approach a Parent's Bedtime(00:26:20) - Alexandra on Collaborative Parenting(00:35:25) - The Importance of Helicopter Parenting(00:43:00) - Slow Down With Your Child(00:50:51) - Slow Down in the Moment

Some books change the way we see. Rhonda Roorda's In Their Own Voices did that for countless adoptive families, including our own here at ETC. In this episode, Rhonda returns to walk us through her debut memoir, Torn from the Root, and the four questions at its center: who was going to get hurt, what was it going to cost, who would be held accountable, and what hope could there be for repair. It is a tender, unflinching conversation about transracial adoption, the voice of the child within, and what it really takes to belong. Listener-care note: this episode includes honest discussion of trauma, abuse, and mental health within the context of transracial adoption. In this episode Why Rhonda turned the lens on her own story after decades of documenting others, and what it meant to listen to the little girl within her The four questions from her memoir that frame the whole conversation The history most adoptive families never hear, from the 1970 National Association of Black Social Workers statement to the research that shaped current policy How everyday language and labels shape a child's sense of identity and worth The difference between celebrating a child's culture and simply living near it A family "blueprint" approach to belonging, where every member is honored and advocated for What repair actually requires, starting with an honest audit of ourselves How nurture, in ETC terms, shows up in our words, our attention, and our follow-through Resources Torn from the Root: A Memoir of a Black Transracial Adoptee by Rhonda M. Roorda (Temple University Press). Pre-order available now, releasing July 2026. In Their Own Voices, In Their Parents' Voices, and In Their Siblings' Voices, the landmark trilogy Rhonda co-authored with Dr. Rita J. Simon In Their Voices: Black Americans on Transracial Adoption, Rhonda's award-winning solo work Rhonda M. Roorda's website: https://rhondamroorda.com Context referenced in the episode: the 1970 National Association of Black Social Workers position on transracial adoption, and the Multi-Ethnic Placement Act of 1994 with the Interethnic Adoption Provisions of 1996 Chapters (00:00:04) - Rhonda Rorda on Transracial Adoption(00:07:12) - Transracial Adoption: A memoir(00:13:48) - Rhonda on Transracial Adoption(00:16:48) - Who Is Being Hurt in Transracial Adoption?(00:24:43) - In the Land of Adoptees: Language(00:28:53) - From A Commodity to the World(00:30:49) - Othering Transracial Adoptees(00:37:15) - What Would It Have Been Like to Experience A Real African Family?(00:46:40) - Adoption advocates speak out for equity(00:47:47) - Adoptees Speak Out About the Transracial Adoption System(00:53:59) - African American culture in the Netherlands(00:59:07) - Transracial Adoptions: The Need for Nurture(01:05:02) - Torn from the Root Review(01:12:53) - Telling My Story of the Transracial Adoption System(01:19:11) - From Here to Eternity(01:22:47) - Rhonda's Empowerment to Connect: Where Do We Go

You said it would be the last warning. You meant it this time. And somehow you are standing in the hallway with your voice raised, wondering how you ended up here again. If consequences have quietly become your first move, and you are starting to suspect they are not actually working, this conversation is for you. What we cover in this episode Why a consequence is so often the first thing we reach for, and what that reach is usually really about What a quick consequence shuts down: the curiosity, the teaching, and your child's chance to learn what to do instead The difference between a punishment mindset and a loving limits mindset, and how each one handles power How the Faris and Ottinger homes actually deal with mistakes now, including the "consequence" the Faris’s friends could not believe was real Small, doable first steps if you want to lean on consequences less, starting with one question you can ask yourself in the moment Resources mentioned Cultivate Connection (the on-demand parenting course where the Collaboration module lives): https://empoweredtoconnect.shop/products/cultivate-connection-on-demand Connecting Practices Handbook (ideas for giving voice, choices, and compromises): https://empoweredtoconnect.shop/products/connecting-practices-handbook-ebook Chapters (00:00:00) - Nick Faris on Empowered to Connect(00:01:58) - Questions about Consequences in Parenting(00:09:48) - Jesse on Contribution to Consequences(00:15:16) - What Happened When You Changed the Way You Parent Your Kids(00:21:19) - Do Parents Need To Complain About Mistakes?(00:28:46) - What Kind of Consequences Should Parents Have for Their Kids?(00:34:42) - The Limits of Parental Communication(00:37:58) - What is a Punishment Mindset and a Loving Limit Mindset(00:39:36) - The Loving Limits vs Punishment Mindset(00:45:37) - When You Can't Get What You Want(00:46:47) - How to Talk to Your Child About Consequences(00:52:56) - What Do I Want My Children To Remember About Their Childhoods?(00:57:02) - How to Civillate Connection in Parenting(01:00:22) - Closing Thoughts On The Nick Podcast(01:01:38) - Reclaiming the Preciousness of Our Children

Summer is here, and Jesse and Tona are keeping it real: they love summer, and it also asks a lot of them. In this episode, they sit down (virtually, because summer pivots happen to hosts too) to talk honestly about what it actually feels like to parent through the loss of structure — and what it can look like to find your footing in the middle of the season. They cover everything from the emotional load working parents carry when school lets out, to practical ideas for younger kids and teenagers alike. Whether your summer is high-energy or gloriously low-key, this conversation is a permission slip to stop trying to curate someone else's summer and start trusting your own. In this episode: Why summer can feel like something you have to survive even when you love it The difference between structure and rigidity — and why predictable rhythms matter for kids Practical, low-cost ideas for younger kids The "summer of ___" concept for kids & teenagers Boredom tolerance as a regulation skill — and what to do when your child genuinely can't self-entertain Resources & Mentions: ETC Summer Survival Kit Use Scaffolding - Free downloadable, Podcast Episode 90 & Episode 147, and we just wrote about this in our newest ETC Newsletter! The Lazy Genius Collective / Kendra Adachi Inside Out 2 (the character Ennui) Chapters (00:00:00) - How to Survive the Summer(00:02:40) - How Do You Feel About Summer?(00:06:55) - How to Plan for the Summer(00:12:15) - Summertime Work and Life Balance(00:14:35) - How To Survive Summer(00:17:07) - How to Plan Your Summer Survival Guide(00:20:55) - What's Your Summer Plan?(00:25:12) - What Makes Summer Feel Like Summer?(00:30:26) - Summer Plans for Your Kids(00:38:04) - When You Can't Help But Remember Your Hooligans(00:39:13) - Summer Is For Me(00:45:59) - How to Survive A Summer With Kids(00:49:36) - I Wish Bored Kids Could Be Tolerated(00:54:58) - Bored Kids: How Do They Regulate Their Mind?(00:58:55) - How to Deal With Bored Kids This Summer(01:03:12) - A message for the summer(01:04:33) - summer Survival Kit

Why do kids lie, even when the truth would have been easier? This week, we’re replaying an oldie but a goodie: Let's Talk About Lying with Robyn Gobbel. Lying is usually about fear and felt safety, not character. This one will change how you respond. Chapters (00:00:04) - Summer Survival Kit(00:01:29) - Robin Goble on Lying(00:04:08) - We Only Lie Because It's Okay to Tell the Truth(00:10:29) - How to regulate the stress brain(00:14:49) - Don't Ask Your Child If He Did or Didn't Take Out(00:20:57) - Talking About Lies With Kids(00:26:30) - When Your Child Lies, It's Not Your Fault(00:32:18) - How to Talk to Your Child About Sexual Abuse(00:35:17) - How to Train a Child to Tell the Truth(00:39:24) - Real Talk About Lies(00:43:02) - A Parent's Advice On Love and Connection(00:46:40) - How to Parenting After Trauma (

Catch the replay! Mona is a Pediatric Psychologist and the author of Beyond Behaviors, among several other books. If you've ever read Beyond Behaviors, you know how brilliant she is! In this episode, we talk about the Brain - Body - Behavior connection and why it is absolutely essential for parents and caregivers to understand. Struggling with perplexing behavior in your home? This may be the episode you've been waiting for. We also talk about Mona's book that was published in 2022. Wanna learn more from Mona? Buy her book Beyond Behaviors here, sign up for the Beyond Behaviors course Mona teaches here or head on over to her website to learn more about her there!

Episode 237 is live! ️ If someone you love is in the middle of a new placement (whether that's a newborn, a toddler, or a teenager), this one is for the people standing beside them. Tona, Becca, and Jesse get practical about what it actually looks like to show up well for foster and adoptive families. Not just in the first week, but in the long haul. What's the most meaningful thing someone did for you (or that you did for someone else) during a new placement?

Community can feel different when your parenting journey looks different. Sometimes your circle shifts. Sometimes it shrinks. And sometimes it stretches you in ways you didn’t expect. But here’s what’s true: you are not the only one figuring it out as you go. Ask for help. Say the honest thing. Find people who truly get it, and hold onto the ones who love you even when they don’t fully understand. Your community might not look how you imagined, but it can still show up for you, support you, and grow with you. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

In this episode Becca, Jesse, and Tona walk us through what it looked like for them at the beginning of their parenting journey. Starting foster care, adoption, or any new parenting role can feel disorienting and overwhelming. It won’t always feel natural or easy, and you may not feel an instant connection. That’s normal! There will be stress, uncertainty, and moments where you question yourself, but that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. What matters most is showing up consistently, being willing to learn, and creating a sense of felt safety over time. You don’t have to be perfect to make a real difference. Your steadiness and presence is what builds trust. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

Let’s talk about the “Wall Between Us”, the invisible, protective bricks we build from past hurt that quietly block connection with the people we love most. Our snapping, withdrawing, overreacting, and people-pleasing once protected us. But what if they’re now keeping us stuck? Healing doesn’t start with fixing our kids. It starts with noticing our own “shark music;” noticing what is keeping us from connection. This conversation is about compassion over shame. Curiosity over judgment. And small, daily shifts that break generational cycles. Every brick you take down builds something better for the next generation. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

What if connection is one of the most powerful tools in the classroom? In this episode, Marti Smith and Amie Huggins join us to share about their new book The Connected Classroom and what they’ve learned working with educators inside real school systems. They talk about why building trust with students matters so much—and how connection creates the safety kids need to engage, learn, and grow. If you’re a teacher, caregiver, or anyone who cares about helping kids thrive at school, this conversation offers practical encouragement and hope for creating classrooms where students feel safe, seen, and ready to learn. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube! Suppoort Amie and Marti by ordering their book.  https://a.co/d/098ZnA1F To reach Amie, check out the information below. Website:  www.amiehugginsconsulting.com Email: [email protected] Instagram: teacher_amie49 To reach out to Marti, check out the information below. Website: www.creativetherapies.com

Does your nervous system feel like it’s been in survival mode for a long time? This episode is for you. We sat down in person with Melissa Corkum to talk about burnout, blocked care, and why connection can start to feel like a shock instead of a reward. A few takeaways: ✨ Emotional pain and physical pain activate the same parts of the brain. ✨ Blocked care isn’t a character flaw — it’s a protective response. ✨ You don’t heal it by trying harder. You start by caring for your own nervous system. If you’ve felt resentful, numb, exhausted, or ashamed for not feeling the joy you “should,” you are not alone. It won’t always feel this way. Keep hope. Carry on. We’re with you. For the Blocked Care Assessment, click here.

On this next part of our mini-series “When You’re Tired”, we reflect on being emotionally tired. It is the quiet exhaustion that comes from caring deeply, showing up consistently, and holding space for others. Dr. Archandria Owens and Jesse discuss naming and expressing emotions, unmet expectations, and explore gentle ways to care for ourselves when we are exhausted in this particular way.

On today’s episode, Jesse and Jill Stockburger dive into a big question: What do we do when we’re living in chronic stress? They talk about how stress, adversity, and trauma impact us on a deeper level, and what it actually feels like to carry these experiences in our bodies. If you’re feeling tired in your body, you are not alone.

In today’s episode, Jesse and Tona take a deep dive into the tension between connection and compliance in everyday parenting moments. Through real-life stories (yes, even dishes), we explore how prioritizing relationship doesn’t mean abandoning expectations and structure. Instead, it creates the foundation for lasting responsibility and trust. Join us for a thoughtful conversation about playing the long game, responding instead of reacting, and why connection is often the fastest path to meaningful compliance.

New semester! Same kids, different needs. As the second half of the school year begins, routines may get messy, expectations may shift, and those old pain points may resurface. In this episode Jesse, Becca, and Dr. Rachel talk about pausing, noticing what’s not working, and making small, doable adjustments (at home and at school). From the kiddos to adults, we can all find ways to revamp our expectations by staying curious and starting small. Here’s to a second semester filled with grace, flexibility, and hope!

A quote that we posted, “Your willingness to come back and repair matters more than getting it right the first time” went viral. On this week’s episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast, we dig into why rupture shows up so often in our families and why it’s completely normal. Rupture happens because we get tired, distracted, overwhelmed, or just out of sync. In our homes, we’re our most unfiltered, exhausted, and real selves, and that means disconnection is bound to happen. But repair is where trust grows, safety forms, and connection deepens. Our kids don’t need perfect parents; they need repairing parents. And honestly? We’re all learning how to come back together, one moment at a time.

It's that time of year again - time to take a deep breath and spend hours and hours with family members you may or may not want to see, eat foods that may or may not be easy for your kids to eat and spend the next month or so with the dull hum of presents and high expectations accompanying your every move. Happy Holidays everyone! In all seriousness, whether you live for this season or loathe this season, it can be a bear to navigate with all of the out of the ordinary that it brings. Have no fear! On this replay episode, Jesse Faris, Becca McKay, and JD talk through all of these things and more with some practical tips and reminders to help get you through what can be a really tricky season to navigate with your family!

In this episode, Becca, Jesse, and Tona dive into a timely topic: gratitude. With the holiday season in full swing, we can’t help but ask, should children be grateful? If not, how do we scaffold gratitude for our kiddos? Tune in for an honest conversation about expectations, empathy, and what gratitude really means. We share personal stories, a few laughs, and some surprising insights about how gratitude shows up in everyday life. It’s a heartfelt reminder that gratitude isn’t something we demand. It’s something we model and grow in together.

Enjoy this replay of From Trauma and Loss to Healing and Empowerment with Cam Lee Small. One of our favorite Therapists/Adoptee Voices joins us on the pod to talk about lots of things including his book The Adoptees Journey: From Trauma and Loss to Healing and Empowerment. We talk with Cam about everything from how identities are formed in adoptees to things he wishes adoptive parents knew to his own experiences filled with pain and beauty. This is an episode every adoptee and adoptive parent NEEDS to hear. Find Cam’s work at therapyredeemed.wordpress.com and follow him @‌therapyredeemed on Instagram and YouTube.

Ever wonder why certain behaviors leave us scratching our heads? On today’s Empowered to Connect Podcast, we’re diving into sensory processing. What it is, why it matters, and how it impacts our ability (and our kids’ ability) to regulate and move through the day. We all know the basic 5 senses, right? But did you know there are actually EIGHT sensory systems your brain is managing? We're breaking it all down: ✅ What is sensory processing? ✅ What happens when our systems get overwhelmed? ✅ How can we support ourselves and our kids when things feel "off"? We're not Occupational Therapists. Just parents sharing what we've learned. This is a conversation you don’t want to miss!

Parenting takes heart and strategy—and finding the right balance can be tough! In this episode, Becca, Jesse, and Tona dive into how Cultivate Connection, ETC’s peer-to-peer parenting course, helps caregivers strengthen both. You’ll hear insights on parenting styles, nurture, and structure—and how to bring it all together at home. Interested in taking the course? Find a Cultivate Connection Facilitator near you or hop on the waitlist for Cultivate Connection Online, coming early 2026 on the Empowered to Connect Institute.

In this episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast, Jesse, Tona and Becca unpack a powerful analogy from Dr. Becky (@drbeckyatgoodinside), the idea that parenting differently than how we were parented isn’t instinctual, it’s intentional.⁣ We explore what it means to rewire our responses, embrace connection when it feels unnatural, and do the deep, courageous work of parenting with awareness and healing.⁣ If it’s ever felt like you’re “doing it wrong” because it doesn’t come naturally, take a listen. Learn more about Dr. Becky here.

Welcoming a child through adoption, foster care, or kinship is beautiful AND complex. Tona, Jesse, and Becca share candid stories from NICU stays to international travel, name the emotional “roller coaster” of early days, unpack “cocooning,” and offer concrete ways families and their people can prepare, communicate, and support attachment. If you’re a waiting family, a new parent, a grandparent, or a friend who wants to help, this one’s for you.

In today's episode, we are joined by school psychologists Rachel Peterman, PhD and Teressa Davis, PhD with special guest host (and former Dean of Students and School Social Worker) Becca McKay who unveil insights for parents, especially as it pertains to getting to know the special education system. Hear these experts as they share what they wish every parent knew about supporting their child's emotional and academic growth. From nurturing mental well-being to navigating learning challenges, IEP's and 504 plans, this conversation is a valuable starting point for parents seeking to empower their children's success! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

It's August, so kids are going back to school all over the place! Join us today as we throw it back to one of our favorite conversations! We delve into a crucial Back to School conversation with author of Beyond Behaviors, Brain Body Parenting and acclaimed pediatric psychologist, Mona Delahooke! The ETC Team join Mona as this episode delves into effective strategies grounded in neuroscience to navigate the upcoming school year, focusing on emotional well-being, academic success, and social adjustment. Tune in for a concise yet impactful dialogue that empowers parents and caregivers with actionable insights for fostering resilience, positive connections, and overall growth as children transition back to school. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

The Fawn Response! The least known of all the stress responses! We relied on the work of Pete Walker from his incredible book: PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving as we crafted this episode. Stela Sinanaj, Clinical Therapist, and Becca McKay, Program Manager of the ETC Institute join us to explain the ins and outs of the fawn response as well as how to better support the loved ones in your life who identify with this stress response!

The Stress Responses - you know - Fight, Flight and Freeze...well, you may be surprised to learn that there are actually 4 stress responses ("Fawn" is the fourth - don't worry, we'll cover it in great detail in a few weeks). We'll look at how you can support both yourself and those you love IN those responses! Today, we dive into the "Freeze" Response. I'm OUT and you can't thaw me - the Freeze Response is one of the toughest to handle as a parent, friend or caregiver. It can disguise itself in lots of ways, but don't worry, we're here to help! Expressive Arts Therapist Jill Stockberger and ETC Staffer Becca McKay join us to discuss how we can support ourselves and those we love when they freeze.

The Stress Responses - you know - Fight, Flight and Freeze...well, you may be surprised to learn that there are actually 4 stress responses ("Fawn" is the fourth - don't worry, we'll cover it in great detail in a few weeks). We'll look at how you can support both yourself and those you love IN those responses! Today, we dive into the "Flight" Response. Those who experience a flight stress response have learned to avoid conflict to protect themselves. They may physically run away, attempt to change the subject, deflect with humor, or lie. The flight stress response can also be associated with over-achieving or obsessive compulsive tendencies. This instinctive reaction makes people want to flee to escape danger (real or perceived). The flight response is a helpful automatic reaction for self preservation and fleeing harm. How do we support ourselves or our people when they're in flight mode? You'll have to listen in to find out! JD, Becca and Dr. Rachel Peterman explore the ins and outs of the flight response with a unique twist that you do not wanna miss. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

The Stress Responses - chances are, you've heard of them - Fight, Flight and Freeze...well, you may be surprised to learn that there are actually 4 stress responses ("Fawn" is the fourth - don't worry, we'll cover it in great detail in a few weeks) and we are taking the next several weeks to do deep dives into each of them! We'll look at how you can support both yourself and those you love IN those responses! Today, we dive into the "Fight" Response. Those who identify with a fight stress response have learned to step up to the plate to protect themselves. This instinctive reaction often sends them into an aggressive, sometimes attack mode to fend off the danger they face - real or perceived. What's the best way to support someone with a fight response? You'll have to listen in to find out! JD, Becca and Tona walk through everything from what a stress response is to how to support those you love in the middle of those 'fight' responses.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

Today, we’re joined by Kaycee Stanley, Executive Director and Founder of The Reel Hope Project — an organization using powerful, strengths-based videos to connect kids in foster care with their forever families.  Kaycee shares the heart behind their mission, the balance of holding onto hope while honoring each child’s story, and how their videos capture what makes each child come alive.  Don’t miss this inspiring conversation about storytelling, connection, and making a lasting impact!  To learn more about The Reel Hope Project, click here!

Friendships Matter More Than You Think! Whether you’re surrounded by a solid circle of friends or navigating a season of loneliness, connection matters. This week on the podcast, we’re breaking down the three types of friends everyone needs — those walking alongside you, those a step ahead, and those just a bit behind. Join us as we share personal stories and practical insights on how to build a rich, meaningful community. Whether you’re feeling connected or craving deeper connections, this episode is for you.

What is regulation anyway—and why does it matter for our kids (and us)? This week we’re diving into the basics of self-regulation—what it really means to be balanced and steady, why deep breaths aren't always enough, and how our kids move from needing our help (co-regulation) to doing it on their own. We talk about: ✨ What dysregulation actually looks like (hint: it's not always a meltdown) How attachment plays into emotional regulation Why one-size-fits-all solutions don’t work And how compassion—for our kids and ourselves—is the real game-changer Whether your child is bouncing off the walls or shutting down completely, this episode is for you. And remember, you are not alone!   Head to YouTube to watch our short video on What is Self Regulation!  

It’s more than cake and balloons. What does it really mean to celebrate someone — especially our kids? Is it about big parties and perfect gifts? Or is it something deeper? This week on the podcast, we’re talking about the heart behind celebration: the power of being seen, known, and cherished. We’ll share stories of moments we felt celebrated, and explore how simple, intentional gestures can speak louder than any party ever could. Because at the end of the day, celebration says: ✨ I see you. ✨ You matter to me. ✨ Your needs and wants are important. Let’s raise kids who feel this kind of celebration — every day.

Marriage is hard. And if you’re in a tough season, you are not alone! On today’s episode, we sit down with Empowered to Connect's very own Mo and Tona Ottinger, as they share their marriage journey with honesty and wisdom. What happens when you and your spouse aren’t on the same page? When you realize marriage isn’t as simple as A + B = C? Your marriage doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s—but growth happens when we extend the same compassion to our spouse that we do to our kids. As Mo shares on the episode: "This is harder than I thought… and there is a gift in the growing." Join us for this powerful conversation about love, struggle, and the beauty of learning together.   Show notes:  Stress capacity window downloadable 

If you’ve been around here for even a minute, chances are you’ve heard us mention the word “attachment.” Attachment isn’t just a buzzword—it’s the foundation of how our kids feel safe, loved, and connected. But what is attachment really, and why does it matter so much? In this episode, we’re covering: - What attachment is (and what it’s not!) - How it’s built over time through everyday moments - Why it’s about patterns of connection, not perfection When we do our best to tune in and meet our child’s needs, we help create secure attachment, which in turn deepens our connection with our kids. #parentingpodcast #empoweredtoconnect #connectedparenting #attachment101 #attachment #parenting

This week on the podcast, Jill Stockburger joins us to explore how art, music, and movement provide powerful ways to express, heal, and connect—at any age! Art isn't just about creativity; it's a language of healing that reaches us when words fall short. From little kids to teens and adults, anyone can use artistic expression to process emotions, find meaning, and even rewire the brain for resilience. We’re diving into the neuroscience behind why art and play help, and how they’ve been used throughout history as a way to communicate, cope, and create beauty in hard times. If you or your child struggle to express emotions, this episode is for you! #parentingpodcast #empoweredtoconnect #connectedparenting #expressiveartstherapy #arttherapy #thepowerofplay

We’re all on a journey of growth—learning, evolving, and discovering new parts of ourselves. Each of us brings unique personalities, gifts, passions, and stories to the table. And guess what? There’s room for all of us! You’re allowed to change your mind. You’re allowed to grow at your own pace. You’re allowed to be exactly who you are, right where you are. This week, we’re sitting down as friends and coworkers to talk about how we’ve grown—as people, as spouses, as parents! Join us for an honest conversation about the beauty of evolving and the freedom in embracing who you are today.

Join us this week as we go back to the basics! What is stress? Did you know that there are multiple types of stress, and not all of it is bad?! What is trauma? How do stress, trauma, and adversity impact us and our kids? In this episode, we’re breaking down: - The different types of stress + trauma - How trauma affects brain development, the body, and the spirit - The difference between everyday stress and life-altering trauma Let’s get back to the basics and build a better understanding together!   Click here for a list of resources, including printables, podcast episodes, videos, and more!

On this week’s podcast episode, we’re diving deep into the concept of worthiness with the incredible Courtney Tierra! Courtney reminds us of a powerful truth: Our worth exists simply because we do. It’s not tied to grades, appearance, or accomplishments— just by being here, we are worthy and hold inherent value. Today, we will discuss: - How knowing your worth can empower better decisions - The importance of affirming your child and building them up - Why grace and kindness—toward yourself and the kids in your life—are game-changers - The impact of language, especially around adoption, on a child’s sense of self This conversation is packed with practical wisdom for parents who want to instill confidence, self-love, and resilience in their children while continuing their own lifelong journey of embracing worthiness. If you want to learn more about Courtney and her story, you can find her website by clicking here.  You can buy purchase book on Amazon or by visiting her website.  If you'd like some Worthy merchansise, you can find it here!  Finally, follow Courtney on Instagram @theworthyreminders. 

 What if we embraced the slower pace of winter instead of resisting it? In this episode, we’re talking about “wintering”—not just as a season, but as a state of being. We’ll explore why rest and recovery are essential, even when they feel hard to prioritize; and in doing this, we are actually modeling for our kids that it is okay to have needs! We are human and limited, and being able to name our needs and have them met within our family structure is a beautoful picture of connection. Join us this week as we talk through what it could look like to embrace the slowness of this next season!     

  It’s that time of year again….New Year’s Resolutions! Some of us love them, some of us… not so much. But no matter how you feel about resolutions, RE-ADJUSTING can give moments to reflect. Seasons change, jobs change, responsibilities change— what if, instead of looking for more ways to perform, we took the time to ask ourselves: - What do I want more of this year? - What do I want less of? Instead of resolutions that feel rigid or overwhelming, what if we focused on creating checkpoints? Little moments to check in with ourselves, reflect, and adjust. This week on the podcast, we’re diving into how resolutions (or the freedom to skip them!) can actually bring freedom and rest in 2025. Let’s explore how this year can be more about progress than perfection.

If you aren’t familiar, Cultivate Connection is our “flagship” parenting course. In it, you'll learn helpful parenting practices and strategies for kids of all ages! These practical skills are rooted in research on brain-based parenting, attachment, trauma, sensory processing, and more. You can participate in Cultivate Connection through a local Facilitator in your area. If you lead, support, or encourage parents, consider joining our Facilitator Training! This week, the Wooley’s tell us why they decided to become Cultivate Connection Facilitators, how it impacted their relationship and their family, and they mention some of their favorite parenting tools they’ve learned along the way! If you have ever considered becoming a Facilitator, this is the episode for you! Learn how Cultivate Connection and Facilitator training works, details about the class, and how you can apply for our next cohort which starts in January!   Are you a parent who wants to learn more? You can apply to be a Cultivate Connection Facilitator by clicking here! The new cohort begins January 7th, 2025!

Do you ever feel like there’s a wall between you and your kids? Like no matter how hard you try, you're just... missing each other--or tuning into completely different stations? This week on the podcast, we are diving into what it looks like to "tune in" to your child. From personality clashes to communication styles and even attachment patterns, we’ll explore: Why we often “miss” each other in conversations. How our own experiences shape the way we interact. The power of slowing down, turning the dial, and tuning into their wavelength. Connection starts with understanding, and as parents, it’s up to us to take the lead. Your relationship with your kids doesn’t have to feel like static. Let’s figure out how to meet our kids right where they are and create space where everyone feels seen and heard. To find out more about us, check out our website here.  Are you a parent who wants to learn more? Our Cultivate Connection class begins January 7!  If you want to see the "Be Attuned" downloadable that was discussed in this episode, click here for this free resource. 

If you’re a parent, or you work with kids in some capacity, chances are that you've noticed how kids can seemingly change from day to day! They can go from being able to clean their room 18 times, to a complete meltdown from simply being asked.. If you have had the thought of, “Ugh! Why can’t my kid just______.”, you are not alone! On today’s episode, Tona, Jesse, and Becca talk about a helpful framework for looking at kids through a nuanced perspective. It all goes back to a phrase we say often: “Parent the child in front of you.” Kids' ability to handle challenges changes from moment to moment, so don’t be surprised if they can’t do what they did yesterday. Today’s stressors might be different—whether it's school, social pressures, or just life itself. This week, we're diving into how to tune into your child's current state and gauge what they can handle right now. Because sometimes, it's not about what they should do, but what they can do in that moment.   To find out more about us, check out our website here.  Are you a parent who wants to learn more? Our Cultivate Connection class begins January 7!  If you want to see a visual of the stress capcity that was discussed in this episode, click here for this free resource. 

On today’s episode we had the biggest honor of sitting down with clinical counselor and developmental scientist, Dr. Deborah MacNamara! Trust us when we tell you that you do NOT want to miss this episode! Why?? Jesse and Dr. Deborah dive into some deep and pressing issues such as how attachment and food are related, what happens when behavior becomes bigger than connection, recipes for relationships, and even de-constructing the idea of “picky eaters”. You’ll learn, you’ll find encouragement, and you might even shed a few tears in this really informative and life-giving episode of the Empowered to Connect podcast. LISTEN TO THE EPISDE AND DROP THE SECRET WORD IN THE COMMENTS FOR A CHANCE TO WIN A COPY OF DR. MACNAMARA’S “NOURISHED.” Find Dr. Deborah MacNamara on... Facebook: Dr. Deborah MacNamara X: @debmacnamara Instagram: @drdeborahmacnamara Subscribe to Dr. Deborah MacNamara’s Kid's Best Bet NewsletterWebsite is here! Buy her newest book Nourished

On today’s episode Jesse, Tona, and Becca open a big can of worms… When I set a boundary, I get “Crying and foot stomps and glares, OH MY!” Why is this happening?? What do I do about it?? Listen in as we unpack BIG reactions that we encounter with the kids that we love. Subscribe to the Empowered to Connect Podcast, follow us on socials, and let us know what you want to hear more about!

Listen to today’s episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast: Help! We’re not on the same parenting page! One of the number one parent questions we get is “HOW can I get my spouse on the same page with parenting???” It makes sense - we each bring SO much of our own history into the equation, so it takes work to get on the same page! Listen in as Jesse, Becca, and Tona share lessons they’ve learned along the way at different points in the parenting (and pre-parenting!) journey. Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, so you don’t miss any of our bi-weekly episodes!

YOU DO NOT WANT TO MISS TODAY’S ETC PODCAST EPISODE! Jamie Finn shares some incredible truths including: what should a foster/adoptive parent do when they are lonely? Where do YOU find your hope? Why should we be thoughtful about the language we use? Hear this and more with a delightful guest and huge voice for supporting adoptive and foster communities. PS: TODAY her new book Filled is being released!  Foster the Family blog Filled Conference Filled Book Filled Book Tour Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, so you don’t miss any of our bi-weekly episodes!

This is us: unlock the power of rituals. What's a ritual? Nothing fancy... this includes pizza nights, class cheers, inside jokes, the “first day of school pics,” traditions around holidays. Jump into today’s episode to hear how you can create meaningful moments of connection in your everyday routines and throughout the seasons of life! Pro tip: look for opportunities to create a ritual to build connection with the kids in your care.

Rhythm and Blues: unlock the power of routines. In our Fall Launch episode, friends Becca, Jesse, and Tona talk about how ROUTINES can change everything for your family! Whether you are “type A organized” or “go-with-the -low” - you’ll hear us dig into the many different ways routines can look and feel. Hear how routines can solve pain points, create felt safety, and allow some calm to enter your home.  

You may believe that this approach is for little kids, or you may know someone else who thinks that way! Today we are joined by the Davaults, who share their extensive experiencing of walking alongside teens for years in different contexts! They are here to debunk the myth that this approach is only for the littles! Listen for wisdom and practical insights on how we can use Connected Parenting principles to lovingly walk alongside our teens as they grow in independence and autonomy. A quick note from us at ETC! We will be taking a Summer Pause from the ETC Podcast! We're excited about what's coming up next in the Fall, and hope you'll go back and re-listen to your favorite episodes! Stay tuned!

There are a TON of myths about what Connected Parenting is and isn’t. Today Cultivate Connection Facilitators Julie and Jess talk about the idea that you have to give up ALL STRUCTURE to parent from a Connection based approach. Spoiler alert: that’s a myth! Listen in to hear tips and mindsets about how to increase both your structure and your nurture to care for the child in front of you!

In our Memphis-based clinic we serve families and their first point of contact is our Family Care Team. Today members of that team talk to us about HOW and WHY taking care of the WHOLE family is so very important! If you’re a parent who has wondered why you can’t just drop your child off at counseling to make them “all better” - listen in! If you’re a professional who feels like you’re missing a puzzle piece or ten - listen in! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect here!  Help us out - SUBSCRIBE to the Podcast and leave us a review to let us know how we're doing!  

We've talked about stress capacity before, but this week we had SO much fun hearing from BOTH of the McKays about how understanding their own stress capacity was a game-changer! Listen for Rico’s raw and authentic take on how reflecting on his own stress capacity has made him a better elementary school teacher, friend, and husband. How do you know when your stress capacity is running low? What can you to about it?? What “fills your tires” as you navigate “life’s potholes”? We'll get into that and more on today's episode. Head to our website for a free downloadable about Stress Capacity!

TBRI® is an attachment-based, trauma-informed intervention that is designed to meet the complex needs of vulnerable children. TBRI® uses Empowering Principles to address physical needs, Connecting Principles for attachment needs, and Correcting Principles to disarm fear-based behaviors. While the intervention is based on years of attachment, sensory processing, and neuroscience research, the heartbeat of TBRI® is connection. On today’s episode, our Safe and Secure Tennessee Program Team talks about how you can use these VERY principles to promote a healthy staff culture! Listen for WHAT a healthy staff culture looks like, HOW to take steps to build that, and WHERE to reach out for help! Learn more about KPICD and Safe and Secure TN here!

Today we sit down as a team to talk about…. how we talk about things! What is the impact of our labels? What can we keep in mind about our language? How can we speak to and about people in a way that honors their dignity? Listen for reflections on times we’ve said things and regretted them and how we’re moving forward! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!  

Today we host the host of the TBRI® podcast to talk about her journey with Trust-Based Relational Intervention! Sarah is one of the most thoughtful and down-to-earth people that we know, and we loved getting a behind-the-scenes look at her story!  Listen for insights and inspiration on how to keep going in your parenting journey and supporting those in your community. You'll hear both personal and professional reflections from Sarah's experience.  For more from Sarah Mercado, listen to the TBRI® Podcast or follow @child_tcu on socials!  

When Mary Beth Chapman and her husband Steven, the highest selling Christian Music artist of all time, were starting Show Hope, they knew they were in for a life long mission. Today, Mary Beth and her daughter Emily join us to talk about the origins of Show Hope, the early connection to Empowered to Connect and why they believe, even in the darkest moments, that we can all find Hope for the Journey. You can learn more about Show Hope and find out how to watch the Hope for the Journey Conference by following @showhope !

In today's FINAL episode of Carpool Q&A we wrap up by discussing why in parenting (and in life) it's about the journey - not the destination.  You can find EVERY episode of Carpool Q&A and the Empowered to Connect Podcast on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Today on the show, friends of the program and prolific authors, Melissa Corkum and Lisa C. Qualls join us to talk about some exciting news! They cover their decision to re-brand their organization (formerly The Adoption Connection) to "Adoption Wise" and their newest resource "Foundations for Overcoming and Preventing Blocked Care" - a course you can take in community to begin working through the healing process and learning how to reclaim compassion in your parenting journey.  As always, Lisa and Melissa meet us right where we are with compassion and empathy and SO much practical wisdom to help you walk out of those tough seasons of parenting when you feel stuck. It's a fantastic episode that is sure to encourage and bring life to everyone who listens. Make SURE to follow them on Instagram here - you'll know why that's so important after listening to the episode! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website, by following us on social media or checking out the hundreds of video resources on our YouTube page!

Today on Carpool Q&A we tackle a question that at least two of our hosts know all too well - "How do I do connected parenting when there's multiple kids?" It's a great question - we advocate for lots of time spent with your kids when you're attempting to parent in this way and sometimes it may feel like practically there are just too few parents and too many kids to actually do this thing. If this is you - rest easy - we got you! Today JD (who has 4 kids), Tona (who has 6 kids) and Becca (who is used to managing classrooms and behavior offices of 20-30 kids) talk us through how to stay connected, build connection and maximize every moment on Carpool Q&A! You can find every episode of Carpool Q&A on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you get your favorite podcasts!

Today on the show we have VERY special guests - the founders of Empowered to Connect, Michael and Amy Monroe join us to tell the story of Empowered to Connect AND to talk with us about nurturing young adults. If you've never heard Michael and Amy share the ETC story or talk about parenting, you are in for a treat! We talk about the origins of ETC, early Dr. Purvis stories and the Ottingers' introduction into ETC during the early days. We also talk to Michael and Amy about how to think through nurturing our kids into the young adult stage - this can be a wildly challenging and wildly rewarding time of parenting, but as Michael and Amy share with us, the difference between those two things is often a shift in mindset for parents. The Monroes share some incredible stories and give practical tips for you as you parent toward the young adult season - but if we're honest, a lot of the advice given today works in any season of parenting - you do not want to miss this episode! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website, by following us on social media or checking out the hundreds of video resources on our YouTube page!

Within the framework of Connected Parenting lie some fundamental beliefs - not the least of which is that we want to attempt, whenever possible, to give our children 'yeses' as often as possible. To "say yes when we can and no when we have to" - but if you've been around this world long enough, you've inevitably seen or heard the criticism that people practicing parenting in the way we do "can't" tell our children no. As in, we're incapable of it because we're too soft (or insert any other criticism of connected parenting). We're here today to debunk that myth and to do it we've got Becca McKay and Tona Ottinger with us again on an episode you don't want to miss! You can find Carpool Q&A every week right here in the Empowered to Connect Podcast feed as well as on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your favorite podcasts!

Today one of our favorite recurring guests joins us to talk about nurturing teens! If you're parenting in this stage, you know this is an absolute must listen because whew boy - teenagers can be a CHALLENGE to nurture. Thankfully, Jacque gives us perspective, practical wisdom about how to navigate this season and some stories to help us remember HOW important it is to lean into these stages and give our babies what they need, even when they are acting like they don't want us around.  You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website, by following us on social media or checking out the hundreds of video resources on our YouTube page!

Critics of connected parenting, attachment-based parenting, gentle parenting, trauma-informed parenting - whatever you want to label it - often attack this style of parenting as permissive and soft. The goal isn't to be your kid's friend, they remind you. That got one of our listeners thinking - well I know THAT, but...what IS the goal of connected parenting? What's the main point? What are we striving toward here and what can I lay down as a standard for my parenting partner and I to hold to? Today Becca, JD and Tona talk through that exact question on another edition of Carpool Q&A! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website, by following us on social media or by checking out our YouTube Channel!

Today we welcome onto the show very dear friends of ours, whom you've met in separate iterations - Larissa Gregory has joined the pod several times to talk about her professional work and her husband Dee was a key contributor in our "Investing in Hope" video talking about his work as a mental health professional and school nurse. Today, they join us together to tell the story of their family. Walking through some of the most unimaginable tragedy as a family, Dee and Larissa talk about losing their third child, Houston Lamar, nurturing the relationships with their middle school and elementary aged boys Jackson and Lennox and how the journey they have been on as a family is one where they have learned to pull each other in close, give each other what they need and savor absolutely every moment together as a family. It is a powerful story you do NOT want to miss. To learn more about the Gregory family you can follow their journey here - to learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit our website, follow us on social media or exlore the hundreds of video resources on our YouTube Channel!

We've all heard the saying that it takes a village to raise a child - and no doubt if you've listened to this podcast for one episode or all 200+, you know, we advocate heavily for having community support on your parenting journey. Today's Carpool Q&A Question was "I hear you talking about finding your village - but what if I don't HAVE a village?"  Join Tona, Becca and JD as they explore together how to create your village around you when one doesn't exist yet! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our Website or on Social Media!

We've all heard talks of the terrible (insert toddler's age here) years. Insert trauma, adversity or loss into the equation and the challenge multiplies. Advice for this stage of parenting is all over the map, especially when it comes to connected/attachment-based/gentle parenting. So what's a parent to do to navigate this season? Have no fear, we've got two phenomenal Cultivate Connection Facilitators, Shane and Mindy, to talk you through it! Shane and Mindy share their family story, how they came to Empowered to Connect and why they believe so deeply in this way of parenting (especially in the toddler years). Come for the wisdom shared, stay to hear JD start talking on mute at one point, it's all here in today's episode of the ETC Podcast! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website or by following us on social media! New episodes of the ETC Podcast drop every Tuesday and can be found on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Am I a helicopter parent, or am I just involved in my children's lives? Helicopter parenting is a term for parents who are overly involved in their children's lives, trying to control and monitor every aspect. They might be well-intentioned, but it can lead to an environment where the kids feel smothered or have limited opportunities to learn from their own experiences. Today we talk about that fine line between being involved and supportive vs hovering - and how to set up some simple boundaries to ensure the lines don't blur! New episodes of Carpool Q&A drop every Thursday! in 15 (ish) minutes, we cover one topic to get you from point A to point B. Short enough to listen during a carpool commute, you can find every episode of Carpool Q&A on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube or wherever you find your podcasts!

You may have heard about infant massage before, but is it a real thing? And what part does infant massage and early intervention play in a baby's journey? Today Occupational Therapist and TBRI Practitioner Jodi Haugen joins us to talk all about it! Jodi has been in OT for 20 years, specializing in early intervention and helping parents and kiddos begin their healing journeys together. She explains the neurological side of infant massage, what so many parents of infants miss and one mind-blowing stat that will change how every infant parent views time with their baby! One disclaimer from Jodi: Infant massage is good for babies…barring any medical condition that may preclude it (and there are some).  Premature babies or any baby/child who is medically unstable, for instance. Also be careful with children who may get easily overstimulated…you need to go slow. As with any method of early intervention, we advise walking into these practices hand in hand with a therapeutic professional who can guide this process! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, you can follow us on social media or head to our YouTube Channel with hundreds of hours of content just like this!

Have you ever had one of those weeks where for one reason or another, you're stuck inside THE WHOLE TIME?? Maybe kids are out of school and there's inclement weather - maybe you live in the Southern US and it snows, sending the entire town into shutdown (too soon?)...no matter the circumstances, we're here to help! The team chats about practical ways to build connection, get everyone's needs met and even...find some time to read a book?? All that and more today on Carpool Q&A! You can find EVERY episode of Carpool Q&A and the Empowered to Connect Podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Youtube and wherever you get your favorite podcasts!

We have an incredible episode for you today! One of our favorite Therapists/Adoptee Voices, Cam Lee Small, joins us on the pod to talk about lots of things including his forthcoming book: The Adoptee's Journey: From Trauma and Loss to Healing and Empowerment. We talk with Cam about everything from how identities are formed in adoptees to things he wishes adoptive parents knew to his own experiences filled with pain and beauty. This is an episode every adoptee and adoptive parent NEED to hear. You can find Cam's work and latest offerings at therapyredeemed.wordpress.com and you can find him on Instagram AND on YouTube  @therapyredeemed  . You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website or by following us  @EmpoweredtoConnect  !

One of the most common questions we get - what happens when my child from a connected home steps foot into the "real world"? It is a valid question and a completely rational deduction to make until you dive a little deeper into what connected parenting really entails - join us as we talk all about this question today on Carpool Q&A! Carpool Q&A can be found on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube and everywhere you find your favorite podcasts!

Today we throw it way way back to one of our favorite episodes talking about the power of giving your 'yes' to your children. As any parent with Netflix has probably seen, there's a famous ETC Principle in the newest Jennifer Garner movie "Yes Day." No, ETC didn't make a movie, but there is lots to learn from it! JD, Tona and Mo sit down to talk about one of the most foundational principles in the ETC world - the power of saying yes.  "Isn't that just permissive parenting!?" "If you give these kids an inch, they're ALWAYS going to take a mile." "We aren't trying to spoil our kids." All very common responses to the principle of giving our kids 'yes' often. Yet research and experience from 15 years of ETC Parent Training will tell you otherwise. Join JD, Mo and Tona and learn why 'Yes' is a superpower in your parenting arsenal! During the interview we reference several different resources on this topic - below we've linked those articles as well as some other resources from ETC on the Power of YES:  https://empoweredtoconnect.org/the-privilege-of-saying-yes/ https://empoweredtoconnect.org/building-trust-by-saying-yes/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SF6GmV7zg0 https://www.mindful.org/dr-dan-siegel-hearing-yes-childs-brain/ To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

Where is the line!? That's the common question in LOTS of parenting relationships when trying to decipher how to teach your kids excellence and effort without becoming THAT over the top parent who pushes their kids too hard and breaks relationship. Well. We've found the line and we're going to share it this morning! Actually, sorry, that is false advertising. We ARE, however, here to help guide you to finding that line for you and your family and giving a few practical tools to help you navigate teaching a really essential life skill (trying your best and striving for excellence). It's not easy, but we're here to help! New episodes of Carpool Q&A drop every Thursday in the Empowered to Connect Podcast Network feed and are 15(ish) minute conversations about one topic to get you from point A to point B! You can find every episode on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Sometimes all we need is a simple mindset shift to unlock a new level of life. Today on the show we talk with Becca McKay and Jesse Faris about doing just that in our discipline mindset as parents. It's easy to fall into the trap of becoming solely a reactive parent, but what happens when we shift from a reactive to a proactive mindset? Spoiler alert - it changes everything!   Becca and Jesse give us practical ways to change our mindset while sharing stories of how this shift changes dynamics in ourselves and our kids. You don't want to miss this one!   You can catch every episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your favorite podcasts!

You've made it! Or so you thought - your kids have begun that final ascent into adulthood! Congratulations! No more parenting?? HA! Yeah Right!  Hear Becca, Tona and JD Discuss the shifts that must inevetibally be made as we go from parenting children to parenting young adults - how do we handle independence? What can we do to ensure they're remaining connected and at the same time, finding their place in the world? Today's episode is aimed directly at that question!  Each week, Carpool Q&A Tackles one question from JD Wilson, Becca McKay and Tona Ottinger discuss one topic in 15 minutes or less to help you get from point A to point B! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website, Instagram or YouTube!

Boundaries are talked about a LOT within relationships, particularly within the parenting realm. We all recognize that humans need boundaries - we can't do everything we want all the time without it costing us dearly...if you're a parent, OR you work with children, you see evidence of that on the daily! Boundaries can be hard to set and often the act of "setting boundaries" or "holding boundaries" can place us oppositionally from our children and create an unwanted "us vs. them" mentality which can jeopardize connection, so how do we navigate this? GLAD YOU ASKED! We asked therapist Lauren Wantz that very question and she joined us recently to talk about how not to set "boundaries", but "loving limits" - hear Lauren explain how a simple mindset shift and some practical applications of that mindset can transform discipline in your home on today's episode! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, you can visit us on our website or follow us on social media! You can also catch every episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast and Carpool Q&A, as well as hundreds of hours of additional video content on our YouTube Channel!

Oh boy. Buckle up for this one, the question that we all ask as we cover our faces in shame. What about when it's not just a kid, it's ME losing it? Again!? Don't worry - it happens to all of us. Something triggers us again and before we can catch ourselves and regulate, there we go, flying off the handle again. What do we do in those circumstances and HOW DO WE DO IT!? Tona Ottinger, Becca McKay and JD Wilson from ETC have you covered. Buckle your seatbelt and come along for the ride with us on today's Carpool Q&A! Carpool Q&A Episodes are one-topic episodes about 15 minutes long, designed to get you from point A to point B and drop every week right here on YouTube and in the Empowered to Connect Podcast feed. You can learn more about Empowered to Connect at empoweredtoconnect.org!

Continuing our series on discipline this new year, we've got a good one for you! Today on the show we have Dr. Matt Smith from the Memphis Family Connection Center here to walk us through the 3 C's and 3 D's of discipline when connected parenting. I cannot stress enough how valuable this episode is in its' practicality - if you are struggling with discipline in your home, this is the episode to help you bounce back! Hear practical steps and advice for why connected parenting and discipline is so vital for our kids growing in healthy attachment and how you can help heal and give predictability to your kids and your home. You can find every episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast as well as Carpool Q&A, our 15 minute, one-topic episodes that drop weekly, here on youTube or on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Do your kids struggle with hearing "no"? Great, neither do ours! Ok, but seriously: for all of us poor souls (aka nearly every parent ever) who DO have kids that struggle to hear us answer "no" to a question or request, we've got you covered! Tona, Becca and JD talk about how to help our kids (and ourselves) sit with disappointment and learn to work through it without exploding.  Carpool Q&A episodes are around 15 minutes and center on ONE topic to get you from point A to point B. You can catch them each week on the Empowered to Connect Podcast feed! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our YouTube Channel, our website, or follow us on social media!

Happy New Year! We wanted to start off 2024 with a series on discipline. As the year begins and routines and rhythms kick back into place, it can be difficult for all of us. Holidays often bring less structure, more junk food, different sleeping habits and lots of excitement...which can mean a tougher return to regular life. Have no fear, though, our series on discipline kicks off with the brilliant Dr. Rachel Peterman walking us through the importance of understanding one of the most fundamental connected parenting principles: Connecting while Correcting.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, you can check us out on YouTube, follow us on social media or explore our website!

Sometimes family game night doesn't go as planned - a night that seems set up for success goes sideways in a heartbeat, but why!? Today Becca, JD and Tona join us to discuss why competition can be so difficult and how to give your kids the support they need to thrive! You can find every episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast AND Carpool Q&A on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

On today's episode, Cultivate Connection Facilitator David Davault joins us to talk about how defining wins and losses changed for him when he started learning about attachment and connection. As the holidays approach, definitely take today's episode and soak it in - when we redefine our expectations for ourselves and those around us, it can lead to the best version of us as parents, friends, partners, spouses, etc. Today's episode and all of our episodes can be found on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

It's the holiday season here at ETC and we are here to remind you not to run yourself into the ground! Now, before you respond with the reasons you must run yourself into the ground (no one else is going to do this stuff if I don't, for example), may we look to our phones for a gentle reminder that our batteries HAVE TO charge periodically to keep going. Today the team talks through why recharging is so vital and some ideas of how YOU can recharge yourself during busy seasons to make sure you're able to keep going! You can find every episode of Carpool Q&A and the Empowered to Connect Podcast on video on YouTube and on audio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Today one of our Cultivate Connection Facilitators, Todd Maino, joins Mo and JD to talk about fear. What did we fear as dads early on? What did we fear as dads early on? What settled out and what persisted? How do we process fear and how can we use what we've learned in our parenting journeys to help our kids learn to process their fears in a way that will lead to healing and growth?? All that and more today as 3 Dads Talk About Fear. You can find every episode of the ETC podcast on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast!

Disrespect - the age old identifier of younger generations, punk teenagers and people that cut us off in traffic. The single most outraging thing you did to your parents growing up is now something you find yourself being mad about with your kids? How did this come to be!? Today we tackle the topic of disrespect and attempt to define it, talk about why it's so triggering for us and put some filters in place to help us decode what our kids are ACTUALLY trying to communicate when the disrespect clouds that communication. Thankfully, Becca, Tona and JD are here to talk us through it! Catch up with them and learn what to do when you don't know what to do on another episode of Carpool Q&A! You can find all of our episodes in video now on our YouTube Channel and in audio via Apple Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you find your favorite podcasts!

Today on the show we talk about guilt and shame - something no parent ever deals with...right?? Well, for those who know OTHER PARENTS who may struggle in this area, have no fear, we ask friend of the program and CEO of Kardia Collective Shad Berry and ETC Executive Director Mo Ottinger all about guilt and shame on the show today. As parents (and as people) guilt and shame can invade every area of our lives and wellbeing. Shad, Mo and JD talk about how to define guilt and shame, how they're different, when they can be helpful and when they can be toxic and why it can be so powerful for us to learn the difference.  Please know that while this episode talks a TON about challenges unique to the Dad experience, this episode IS NOT just for dads - it is for anyone who wrestles with navigating the guilt and shame that can so easily paralyze us as parents and people. You do not want to miss it! Shad is a husband and dad to 4 kiddos and is the CEO of Kardia Collective, a counseling, training and coaching collective in Memphis, TN. He is also the author of Next Level Leadership: Navigating the Dramatic Changes Coming in the 2020s. You can find out more about Shad and his work here! To learn more about Empowered to Connect and our global impact, check out our website, our YouTube Channel or follow us on Facebook or Instagram!  

Today we revisit one of our most commented on episodes of last year, our conversation about grief and loss with Therapist Rocky Anthony. Rocky tells his own story of going from a career in church ministry to opening his own private counseling practice and walks through how to process grief and loss when we don't see a way forward. This conversation is powerful, practical and full of hope - you are going to LOVE hearing from Rocky.  Did you know you can now catch every episode of the ETC Podcast and our NEW show, Carpool Q&A on our YouTube Channel? With nearly every episode in video and hours upon hours of content from the ETC Team, Dr. Karyn Purvis and more, our YouTube Channel is a one-stop-shop for support in your journey caring for yourself and your people. Check it out at youtube.com/empoweredtoconnect today!

It's that time of year again - time to take a deep breath and spend hours and hours with family members you may or may not want to see, eat foods that may or may not be easy for your kids to eat and spend the next month or so with the dull hum of presents and high expectations accompanying your every move. Happy Holidays everyone! In all seriousness, whether you live for this season or loathe this season, it can be a bear to navigate with all of the out of the ordinary that it brings. Have no fear, though, Jesse Faris, Becca McKay and JD talk through all of these things and more with some practical tips and reminders to help get you through what can be a really tricky season to navigate with your family! Remember! You can catch every episode on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify and wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

It's Friday and you know what that means - it's time for Carpool Q&A with JD, Tona and Becca! Each week, one of us brings a topic for the group to talk through and today JD asked the question: What do you do when you encounter perpetual lying with one of your kiddos? The group talks it over and gives some explanation as to what could be happening underneath the surface as well as some practical tips to address the issue while continuing to build connection.  You can find every episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast as well as Carpool Q&A on our YouTube Channel, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite Podcasts!

Today on the show we talk about knowing and understanding our stress capacity - this is a skill that is beneficial to every person on earth! Yes, absolutely essential for parents, but also for human beings who endeavor to be in ANY kind of relationship with another human being, knowing ourselves and our stress capacity helps us manage our humanity and help the humans around us manage theirs. Becca McKay joins us to break down what stress capacity is and why it's so vital for everyone.  What can we do to mitigate meltdowns in our home? How can we better understand ourselves and predict what might set us off and handle it before that point? All of that and more in today's episode of the ETC Podcast! To learn more about Empowered to Connect you can check out our website, our YouTube Channel with hours of teaching and conversations to help you take care of the children and other adults in your life and as always, follow us on social media for parenting content and the latest news on what we're up to as an organization!

Welcome to episode 2 of Carpool Q&A - quick episodes about one topic designed to be listened to as you go to or from your carpool responsibilities! This week we cover a topic that affects so many of us today - how to handle picky eaters! Now - before we launch off into the episode, a few caveats - there is not, unfortunately, a 15 - 20 minute conversation that can cure picky eaters or teach you all you need to know about food, trauma and how they affect the brain. We wish there was - but there's not. Today's episode is an attempt to answer some questions and give a few strategies/solutions that can help you on that journey! You can watch brand new episodes of Carpool Q&A on YouTube and listen to Carpool Q&A anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, head on over to our website or follow us on social media!

On today's episode, one of our faorite guests is BACK to talk about her incredible new book. It's our friend Robyn Gobbel and her book, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain, Body, Sensory Strategies that Really Work, is one of our favorite parenting books ever. Robyn talks about why she wrote this book, the thought behind her creative approach of weaving narrative and instruction together and why she felt so strongly to approach the book in a non-traditional way. We also dive deep into some of the strategies and practical advice in the book including what an Owl Brain is and why we need to grow it! You will love this episode and you should go buy Robyn's book immediately - IF YOU DON'T WIN ONE FROM US FIRST! To find out how to win a FREE copy of Robyn's book, listen to the whole episode - we're giving away two copies this week! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website or from following us on social media and don't forget to check out our YouTube Channel for more content!

Surprise!! We have a brand new show launching today!  We're calling it Carpool Q&A - a one-topic show to get you from point A to point B with practical tips and advice to help you parent today. New Episodes drop on Fridays where JD, Becca and Tona will take turns throwing out a topic and discussing it. These will be shorter, more direct episodes than our long form Tuesday episodes and we'd love to know what you think! Today Tona throws out Homework as the topic of the day - tune in to hear Becca, JD and Tona discuss how to support your kiddos through the homework struggles and successes in today's episode of Carpool Q&A! You can learn more about Empowered to Connect on our website or by following us on social media!

Happy Tuesday and I hope you're ready for an uplifting episode today! We've got a special guest, Dr. Maureen Michele with us today and she's going to talk about how to reclaim your life. Dr. Maureen Michele is a mom,  Pediatrician, author, life coach and more - she's here today to talk about how parenting a daughter through a cancer diagnosis changed her life - and how she nearly missed the opportunity to reclaim a life that had become filled with bitterness and frustration.  You will not want to miss this episode! After you've listened, please go buy her book here! You can learn more about Dr. Maureen Michele and all of the offerings she has right here.  If you've been following along with ETC for a while now, you have no doubt heard about our upcoming fundraising event with Grammy-Nominated Comedian and this past week's Saturday Night Live Host, Nate Bargatze! We are UNDER 2 WEEKS AWAY from our event and would LOVE to have you join! There are a handful of tickets still available, so if you want to join us, act now before they're all gone!

In this episode of the Empowered to Connect podcast, our ETCI Program Manager, Becca McKay, joins host JD Wilson to delve into the challenging topic of "How to Talk to Your Kids About Tragedy." With the horrific news coming out of the middle east right now as the war between Israel and Hamas rages on, we thought it pertinent to have an episode where we talk about how to talk about hard things. We will say off of the jump - this isn't an episode explaining how to make this task easy. It isn't an episode to take the guesswork out of a hard conversation like this. Talking to our kids about tragedy is hard. "Tragedy" is a subjective term - some of the topics that may fall into a tragic category for one family are not as uniquely challenging to others and vice versa - that's why we wanted to talk through a simple framework for how to have these conversations in as healthy of a manner as possible. On a lighter note, we are less than a month away from our first ever global connection event here in Memphis, TN with Grammy-Nominated Comedian and this week's Saturday Night Live Host, Nate Bargatze! Join us November 12th in Memphis for a night to remember as ETC hosts our first ever fundraising event to share about the incredibly dire need for our work right now and the exciting future ahead of us! To purchase tickets or have your company sponsor the event, just head to empoweredtoconnect.org/investinginhope TODAY!  

Today's the day to hear from the dads! We've been talking lately at ETC about how important it is to get on the same parenting page as your spouse. It's difficult - it can be contentious - but it's necessary. We had Cultivate Connection Facilitator dads Evan Dyson and recurring guest Todd Baumann join us to talk through that important process - how did they do it? What were the challenges and hurdles and how can YOU avoid those same challenges as you and your spouse work to get on the same parenting page? Glad you asked! Todd, Evan and JD talk through all of it on a special Dads-only episode of the ETC Podcast! Also, don't miss the opportunity to see world renowned, Grammy Nominated comedian Nate Bargatze at the first annual Investing in Hope event this November! Sunday night, November 12th in Memphis, Tennessee, come hear a brand new hour of Nate Bargatze stand up comedy, have dinner and drinks on us and support the global impact of Empowered to Connect all in one night! Details can be found at empoweredtoconnect.org/investinginhope - but hurry, a limited number of tickets are available! 

In today's episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast, we're joined by a recurring guest, the wonderful Rhonda Roorda. Rhonda joined us early in our show's history, if you never listened to that episode, you can (and should) find it right here! She's not only an award-winning author but also a transracial adoptee, bringing a unique perspective to the table. Apart from her work as an author, Rhonda has been a contributor and consultant in a litany of settings from CNN to People Magazine and the Emmy Award Winning NBC TV Series "This is Us". You're going to love hearing from her! Rhonda dives into the real, sometimes tough, and always important aspects of transracial adoption. From identity to embracing cultural diversity, this chat is a down-to-earth conversation about the sometimes beautiful, sometimes ugly, but always messy nuances of transracial adoption. Rhonda shares practical tips for adoptive families and parents. Her experiences and insights are a roadmap for navigating the unique challenges and and opportunities that come with transracial adoption. Don't miss this eye-opening conversation that goes straight to the heart of transracial adoption.  Also, don't miss the opportunity to see world renowned, Grammy Nominated comedian Nate Bargatze at the first annual Investing in Hope event this November! Sunday night, November 12th in Memphis, Tennessee, come hear a brand new hour of Nate Bargatze stand up comedy, have dinner and drinks on us and support the global impact of Empowered to Connect all in one night! Details can be found at empoweredtoconnect.org/investinginhope - but hurry, a limited number of tickets are available! 

In today's episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast, we're joined by ETC Training Specialist Jesse Faris, along with host JD Wilson and ETC Institute Program Manager Becca McKay, to explore the complex world of parenting in the digital age. As technology continues to play an integral role in our lives, it's crucial to strike a balance between maintaining a strong connection with our children and ensuring their safety online. Jesse, JD and becca bring their expertise to the forefront, guiding us through practical strategies for approaching technology with our kids. Whether you're a seasoned parent or just beginning to navigate the digital landscape, you'll find valuable insights on fostering healthy digital habits, open communication, and setting boundaries that empower both parents and children. Also - BREAKING NEWS - Today we announce the mystery guest we've been hinting at for the last several weeks. Joining us at our first ever global connection event is none other than Grammy-Nominated comedian Nate Bargatze!  You heard right, November 12 in Memphis, Tennessee at Investing in Hope, our first ever global connection event fundraiser, catch the one and only Nate Bargatze live and in person! Seats are going fast, so if you want to join us for a night of laughter and hope, head to empoweredtoconnect.org/investinginhope to reserve your seat now and invest in hope for the next generation of world-changing work happening here at Empowered to Connect!

If you are or have been a part of a church, you know childcare can be a minefield for parents whose children have experienced early trauma, adversity or loss. Well-meaning volunteers can become frazzled not knowing how to help, kids become unsure of what to expect and parents wonder "Is it safe for my child to be here the whole service?"  Obviously this isn't everyone's experience, but for those who have or might experience some of these factors, we want everyone to be equipped to know how to make church a safe environment for your kids where you can know they're being taken care of well. That's why we brought Anteelah Love into the mix today to help us learn how to advocate for our kids at church! Anteelah talks through everything from an ideal setup, some ideas of how to help your church get started thinking through these issues, ideas to scaffold care as your church becomes equipped - all of this and more is in today's episode with Becca McKay, JD Wilson and our guest, Anteelah Love! Also - to find out who our HILARIOUS special guest is at our upcoming Global Connection Event: Investing in Hope, to find out how to get tickets and learn all the details about this incredible night, check out our website here! 

Today Josh and Ava Conley join us to discuss the intersection of youth sports and parenting. When choosing to parent through lenses of attachment and connection, sports can be one of the toughest activities to figure out. How should you approach a coach when there's a complaint or a request to serve your child in a different way? How do we prepare our kids for these environments, how do we prepare coaches and those teams to embrace families whose skin colors or ethnic backgrounds don't match? We're glad you asked!  As you can imagine, because this world is so broad with so many different nuances based on sport, age, etc, we tried to fly above the clouds on this episode! Josh has an extensive sports background, having played and coached at nearly every level of sport from pee wee leagues to collegiate athletics - combine that with Ava's black belt martial arts background and you've got a recipe for great conversation! **SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT**!! We would like to extend a special invitation for you to join us at our FIRST EVER Global Connection Event in Memphis Tennessee Sunday night, November 12th from 6-8:30pm at the historic Peabody Hotel! Join our special Grammy Nominated guest (whose name we cannot reveal in this promo, but CAN reveal on the event page right here) for a night of laughter and hope! For more information and to buy tickets for what is sure to be an unforgettable night, click here!

Today we've got a very special guest - Dr. Lauren Chipman, a Pediatrician in Memphis, TN joins us to help us learn how to navigate the tricky world of advocating for your kids in the medical sector. Lauren joins Tona Ottinger and host JD Wilson and brings hear years of experience as a Physician and as a Mom to the table to help us understand how to navigate the world of Pediatricians/hospitals/medical care and you do not want to miss it! Lauren shares everything from a powerful story of her connection to the Ottinger family to the encouragement EVERY parent needs to know, to her own story of realizing how much information about trauma, the brain, attachment and behaviors she DIDN'T learn through Med School, but DID learn about through Empowered to Connect Parenting courses.  You can learn more about Empowered to Connect here! We also make reference in the intro and outro to a special event coming up that you'll want to know about - and we are confident you do want to know more about this one - to learn more about that event, check it out on our website here! Also, to snag one of the 15 remaining spots in our beta test group for individualized parent coaching from ETC, send an email to [email protected] and let them know you'd like to join the beta test group - make sure to mention that you heard about it on the podcast to get 25% off of the cost of this course!  

In today's Empowered to Connect Podcast episode, we're sitting down with MO and Tona Ottinger from ETC and diving into a crucial topic: how to be an advocate for your children within your own family and friends circle! Parenting comes with its own set of challenges, but you don't have to face them alone. MO and Tona are here to help you understand how to communicate your child's needs effectively and seek support from the people who matter most. Learn the ropes of advocating for your kids. From sharing trauma-informed parenting principles to setting boundaries and creating a strong support system, MO and Tona offer practical tips to help you speak up confidently. We also make reference in the intro and outro to a special event coming up that you'll want to know about - and we are confident you do want to know more about this one - to learn more about that event, check it out on our website here! Also, to snag one of the 15 remaining spots in our beta test group for individualized parent coaching from ETC, send an email to [email protected] and let them know you'd like to join the beta test group - make sure to mention that you heard about it on the podcast to get 25% off of the cost of this course!

In today's episode, we are joined by Anna Marie Penn, a former reading specialist and expert in educational advocacy. Anna Marie and her husband, Jonathan, both spent years working in under-resourced schools in Memphis, TN. Now parents to two awesome kids and advocates for many, Anna Marie takes us on a deep dive into the intricate art of advocating for your children within the school system.   With a wealth of experience, Anna Marie delves into the often complex world of 504 plans and Individualized Education Plans (IEP's), offering invaluable insights on how to navigate these processes effectively. Through Anna Marie's guidance, you'll gain a comprehensive understanding of how to ensure your child receives the support they need to thrive academically, emotionally, and socially.   Join us for an empowering conversation that equips parents and caregivers with the tools to champion their child's educational journey, ensuring they receive the tailored assistance that sets them up for success!   To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube! Chapters (00:00:00) - How to Advocate for Your Kid's Special Ed IEPs(00:02:38) - Anna Marie Penn on advocating for 504 and IEPs(00:05:59) - How We Adopted Two Kids Age 7(00:08:37) - Adoptive Families Talk IEPs and Advocacy(00:16:53) - What is a 504 and Special Education? (Individualized Educational Plan(00:24:03) - How to Have an IEP Meeting with an ADHD Child(00:31:19) - How to Get Through a Day as a Principal(00:32:17) - What did you learn from Special Education IEP Meeting?(00:36:28) - Six Rules for Parenting Students(00:40:37) - Advocates for Your Kids: Empowered to Connect

In today's episode, we are joined by school psychologists Rachel Peterman, PhD and Teressa Davis, PhD with special guest host (and former Dean of Students and School Social Worker) Becca McKay who unveil a treasure trove of insights for parents, especially as it pertains to getting to know the special education system. Delve into the minds of these experts as they share what they wish every parent knew about supporting their child's emotional and academic growth. From nurturing mental well-being to navigating learning challenges, IEP's and 504 plans, this conversation is a valuable guide for parents seeking to empower their children's success! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

It's August, so kids are going back to school all over the place! Join us today as we throw it back to one of our favorite conversations! We delve into a crucial Back to School conversation with author of Beyond Behaviors, Brain Body Parenting and acclaimed pediatric psychologist, Mona Delahooke! The ETC Team join Mona as this episode delves into effective strategies grounded in neuroscience to navigate the upcoming school year, focusing on emotional well-being, academic success, and social adjustment. Tune in for a concise yet impactful dialogue that empowers parents and caregivers with actionable insights for fostering resilience, positive connections, and overall growth as children transition back to school. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

In today's episode, we're excited to bring you a masterclass on the art of transitions, led by none other than Becca McKay and Jesse Faris! Becca and Jesse bring a wise and compassionate approach, guiding us through the intricate world of transitions, offering essential insights and practical strategies to navigate your child's (and your own) life's shifts with grace and resilience. Whether it's moving homes, starting a new school year, or even daily transitions, their wisdom shines a light on how these moments can be powerful opportunities for connection, growth, and building a strong foundation of trust. Tune in as Becca and Jesse delve into the nuances of understanding the impact transitions have on children and adults alike. Drawing from their rich experiences as educators and advocates, they share stories that exemplify the transformative potential of intentional transitions. This episode equips parents, caregivers, and professionals with valuable tools to ease anxieties, embrace change, and create environments where both young and old can thrive during life's many transitions.

In today's episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast, we are thrilled to welcome recurring guest, Anteelah Love, Cultivate Connection Facilitator and ETC Training Specialist! Join us as Anteelah talks us through the art of "Repair, Reflect, Readjust" - our last, but certainly not least important Connecting Practice. We talk about how Anteelah and her husband Matthew are using this practice this summer, how much of a game changer it was in their parenting and how it's NOT just for kids...Anteelah shares how this transformative approach fosters healing connections and nurtures resilience in both children and adults. Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or professional working with children, this conversation is brimming with invaluable tools to strengthen relationships, promote emotional well-being, and empower individuals on their journey of connection.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

Today we're joined by Mark and Kelly Raudenbush, Cultivate Connection Facilitators in Philadelphia, PA. Mark and Kelly, among lots of things, head up the Sparrow Fund and are very active advocates in the foster care and adoptive communities. We couldn't think of anyone better to join us to talk about this week's Connecting Practice: 'Respond Thoughtfully.' Discover the transformative power of thoughtful responses in your parenting journey, fostering deeper connections and understanding with your children. Learn practical strategies to respond with empathy, intention, and compassion, creating a positive and nurturing environment for your family. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

It's our 150th episode and who better to join us for the this special occasion than our good friends Nyasha and Regina Chari!? Nyasha and Regina are cultivate connection Facilitators in Zimbabwe and have been ETC Parent Trainers for almost 10 years now! They join us today to talk about the vast importance of understanding how to meet needs for our kids. Sounds basic, right? Well, Becca McKay, the Charis and JD Wilson join us to tell us why this is actually one of the more overlooked and complicated processes as a parent - and one that we absolutely cannot avoid doing for ourselves as well. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

This week on the ETC Podcast we bring in Cultivate Connection Facilitators Matt and Carissa Davis from Memphis, TN to talk with us about a foundational Connecting Practice: Giving Voice. This idea has long been critiqued as 'permissive' parenting due to children being taught to advocate for their needs. Giving your child a voice, however, is far from permissive - on the contrary, it is imperative to connected parenting. Why? Well, you'll just have to tune in today to find out! Hear Matt and Carissa share their story as well as share practical insights and strategies to help your child (and your spouse, relatives, friends and everyone you interact with daily!) learn to have their voice heard and needs met. We cannot understate the importance of this episode enough and the Davises are an absolute delight to hear from! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

Today on the Empowered to Connect Podcast we delve into a pivotal connecting practice: the power of play in parenting with one of our favorite guests, Tom Jordi. Hailing from Johannesburg, South Africa, Tom is not only a TBRI Practitioner but also a Cultivate Connection Facilitator, bringing a wealth of knowledge and experience to our conversation. He and his wife Dawn have 4 kiddos and are an absolute joy to be around, if this is your first time hearing an episode with the Jordis, you're gonna love it! In this episode, Tom engages in a captivating discussion with our host, JD Wilson, and ETC Executive Director, Mo Ottinger, about the profound impact that play can have on the parent-child relationship. Together, they explore how play serves as a transformative tool for fostering connection, building trust, and nurturing healthy attachments. With a refreshing perspective, they discuss various playful strategies that parents can incorporate into their everyday interactions with their children. From imaginative play to sensory experiences, he shares practical insights on how these approaches can cultivate emotional resilience, enhance communication, and create joy-filled moments within the parent-child dynamic. Throughout the episode, our guests share personal anecdotes and real-life examples that illustrate the transformative power of play, highlighting its ability to bridge gaps, facilitate healing, and strengthen the parent-child bond. Tom's expertise and passion shine through as he emphasizes the importance of creating safe and secure spaces where children can express themselves freely and experience the power of unconditional love and acceptance. Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or professional working with children, this episode offers a wealth of valuable strategies and insights that can revolutionize your approach to parenting and caregiving. Tune in as we explore the profound impact of play and its ability to empower parents and children alike on the journey of connection and growth.

Join us for an enlightening episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast as we welcome Cultivate Connection Facilitator Angie Grant and talk about utilizing scaffolding as a fundamental parenting principle. In this episode, we explore the profound impact of scaffolding on our children's growth and development. Scaffolding is a transformative approach that empowers parents to provide the necessary support and guidance to their children as they navigate various challenges and tasks. Becca and Angie, with their wealth of knowledge and expertise, delve into the intricacies of this powerful concept, sharing practical strategies and insights on how to implement scaffolding in our everyday parenting journeys. Through heartfelt discussions and real-life examples, Becca and Angie reveal how scaffolding promotes independence, resilience, and confidence in our children. They guide us through the process of tailoring our support to match our child's unique needs and abilities, creating a solid foundation for their success. With their compassionate and empowering approach, Becca and Angie inspire us to embrace the power of scaffolding as a transformative parenting principle. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on social media and YouTube!

In Today's episode we dive deep into the art of being fully present. Joining us today are Nick and Jesse Faris, cultivate connection facilitators based in Memphis, TN, who bring a wealth of wisdom and experience to the topic. Jesse, who serves on staff at Empowered to Connect as a Program and Training Specialist, and Nick have 2 kiddos through adoption and have been Empowered to Connect trainers for years. Today they share profound insights on the transformative power of presence and its impact on our relationships, creativity, and overall well-being. Together with ETC Institute Program Manager Becca McKay, we explore practical strategies and mindset shifts that can help us cultivate presence in our daily lives. From the art of deep listening to the beauty of embracing stillness, Nick and Jesse guide us on a journey to reconnect with the present moment and uncover its transformative potential. Join us as we delve into the art of being fully present today with a couple that's been making presence a priority for years now!   Reminder - if you haven't already purchased your Connecting Practices Handbook, you can do so from our website today! You can also learn more about Empowered to Connect and all that we've got going on across the globe!

Today on the Empowered to Connect Podcast, we are joined by Todd and Brandy Baumann, two remarkable people who bring a unique blend of expertise and compassion to the world of parenting and caregiving. Todd, an engineer, and Brandy, the coordinator for True Vine Ministries, serving foster and adoptive families at their church, share their insights on on why balancing nurture and structure quickly became their favorite connecting practice in our Cultivate Connection Parenting Course! If you've ever approached the worlds of connected parenting, gentle parenting, attachment-based parenting, etc you'll know this is an absolutely foundational skill to learn. One common misnomer in our way of parenting is that it's all nurture - that discipline and structure go out the window. Well, we're here today to remind you that's not true at all!  Todd's analytical approach as an engineer, combined with Brandy's deep understanding of the needs of foster and adoptive families, creates a powerful synergy that informs their insights on finding the right balance. Together, they share what they've learned about providing the right balance of nurture and structure - we believe it will empower you to connect with your children on a deeper level and promote healthy growth! Reminder - if you haven't already purchased your Connecting Practices Handbook, you can do that as well as check out thousands of other resources and ways to connect to ETC from our website today!

Today, we are thrilled to have special guests Matt and Laurel Smith, Memphis, TN facilitators of ETC Cultivate Connection (ETC's own parenting curriculum). Join us as we delve into the heart of our summer series and explore the very first connecting practice: "Be Curious." Curiosity is a powerful tool that holds the key to deepening connections and fostering healthy relationships. Matt and Laurel guide us through the transformative potential of curiosity in parenting, teaching us how to unlock the doors to understanding and empathy. Both Matt and Laurel are brilliant professionals and veteran parents and they share practical insights and strategies that empower us to cultivate a genuine curiosity in our interactions with our children, friends, family and beyond! You'll recognize Matt's voice as a frequent guest, he currently serves as the Clinical Director of the Memphis Family Connection Center, one of ETC's 3 main programs. Laurel has been in the educational system as a teacher in every age range and has worked to incorporate attachment based, connection-centered practices into her classroom for years. Throughout this conversation, we uncover the profound impact of curiosity on our children's emotional well-being and development. Matt and Laurel share their personal stories and wisdom, leaving us inspired to embrace the beauty of curiosity as a foundational pillar in our parenting journeys. Reminder - if you haven't already purchased your Connecting Practices Handbook, you can do so from our website today! Get ready to embrace the power of curiosity and cultivate deeper, more meaningful relationships with your children.

Join Tona Ottinger, Becca McKay, and host JD Wilson in today's episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast as we delve into the exciting new resource available at empoweredtoconnect.org/store — the Connecting Practices Handbook! This handbook is a comprehensive guide designed to empower individuals, families, and professionals with an overview of the 9 Connecting Practices found in our parenting curriculum course, Cultivate Connection. During this episode, Tona, Becca, and JD highlight the significance of the Connecting Practices Handbook and how it can positively impact the lives of children and families. They discuss the various chapters and sections of the handbook, exploring its rich content and actionable insights. In addition to exploring the handbook itself, we share some exciting news! Throughout the summer, the Empowered to Connect team will embark on a special journey, walking through the nine connecting practices with facilitators from all over the world. Listeners will have the opportunity to learn from these experienced practitioners as they dive deep into each practice, sharing their wisdom, stories, and practical application tips. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on Facebook and Instagram and Subscribe to our YouTube channel for hundreds of hours of valuable teaching content from renowned experts like Dr. Karyn Purvis, Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, Mona Delahooke, The Empowered to Connect Team and more!

On today's episode of the Empowered to Connect podcast, we delve into the inspiring parenting journey of Mike and Kristin Berry, the founders of The Honestly Adoption Company.In this heartfelt conversation, Mike and Kristin share their personal experiences as adoptive parents, opening up about the challenges, joys, and transformative moments they encountered along the way. With their unique blend of vulnerability, wisdom, and humor, they provide invaluable insights into the world of adoption and foster care, offering encouragement and practical strategies for families navigating similar paths. Hear Mike and Kristin tell the story of the origins of The Honestly Adoption Company, a caregiving resource creator and community dedicated to equipping and empowering adoptive and foster parents. Hear how Mike and Kristin's own journey inspired them to create this powerful platform, providing a wealth of resources, training, and support to families worldwide. No matter where you are in your parenting journey, this episode will leave you inspired and equipped to walk the road to connection and attachment with the kiddos in your life. Mike and Kristin share their hard-earned wisdom, reminding us that love, connection, and resilience can truly transform lives.Don't miss out on this incredible conversation! Join us and listen to Mike and Kristin Berry on the Empowered to Connect podcast. For more information about how to follow the Berry's, their work and resources, visit honestlyadoption.com. To check out the link Mike referenced, check it out here: http://honestlyadoption.com/gettrauma101 To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website, follow us on Facebook and Instagram and Subscribe to our YouTube channel for hundreds of hours of valuable teaching content from renowned experts like Dr. Karyn Purvis, Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, Mona Delahooke, The Empowered to Connect Team and more!

Prepare for a remarkable episode of the Empowered to Connect podcast as we explore the transformative pages of Aundi Kolber's book, "Strong Like Water." This captivating work not only acknowledges the courage it takes to survive but also equips readers with practical tools to transition from mere coping to embodying true strength.In "Strong Like Water," Aundi Kolber's voice rises like a wise and gentle guide, resonating with those navigating their own deep waters. With profound insight and compassion, she calls forth your inner strength  and resilience. Join us as we dive into "Strong Like Water" and uncover the transformative wisdom it holds. Aundi's practical tools and heartfelt guidance will empower you to rise above, embracing your own resilience and gaining the embodied strength needed to navigate life's journey. Don't miss this inspiring conversation as we explore the transformative power of Aundi Kolber's "Strong Like Water." You can find Aundi online @AundiKolber on Instagram and you can buy her book on any major platform (though a local bookstore would be preferable)!

Today on the Empowered to Connect podcast, we are joined by Becca McKay and Tori Hope Petersen as they share their personal stories of how Mother's Day can be a difficult and painful experience for them. Both Becca and Tori have experienced significant grief and loss related to their childhood mothers, and in this conversation, they courageously open up about the complexities of navigating this holiday as adults who have been impacted by trauma, adversity, grief and loss - some of which has occurred ON Mother's Day for them. Tori, who is the author of the book "Fostered," shares her journey of growing up in the foster care system and the many ways in which this has shaped her understanding of motherhood. Becca, who is also an advocate for foster care and adoption, speaks candidly about her own experiences of loss and how these have impacted her and the way she interacts with everyone in her life. Together, Becca and Tori offer a unique perspective on the challenges that come with Mother's Day, and they provide valuable insights into how individuals and communities can support those who may be struggling during this time. Whether you have a personal connection to grief and loss, the foster care system or are simply looking to gain a deeper understanding of the complexities of Mother's Day, this episode is a must-listen. Join us as we explore this important topic with two incredible women who have truly lived it.

We've got a great one for you today! In today's episode, we are thrilled to have Lucinda Miles as our guest. Lucinda a TBRI Practitioner with Volunteers for Youth Justice in Shreveport, LA, where she is bringing life-changing TBRI training to the juvenile justice system and incarcerated individuals. Lucinda's work is focused on bringing hope and healing to those who have experienced trauma and adversity. Through her innovative approach, she is empowering families involved in the juvenile justice system and incarcerated individuals to heal from their past and build a better future. Her work is not only transforming the lives of those she serves, but it's also changing the face of the criminal justice system in Shreveport. Hear Lucinda tell the story of Judge David Matlock, who, after learning about trauma and the brain completely transformed his courtroom to be trauma-responsive and the stories are astounding. Join us as we hear from Lucinda about her work with Volunteers for Youth Justice, the impact of TBRI training, and the inspiring stories of transformation she has witnessed. This is a must-listen episode for anyone who is passionate about making a difference in the lives of vulnerable children and families. So, grab a cup of coffee, sit back, and get ready to be inspired! To learn more about Volunteers for Youth Justice, check out their work here! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Well. In some seasons of parenting, staying in the good work feels impossible. Maybe impossible is the wrong word, maybe hopeless or 'not worth it' is a better way of expressing it. In all reality, we believe every hard season hits in different ways for different people and their contexts.  So what do we do when we reach one of those places? How do we muster up the strength to continue? I have great news - you don't have to figure it out alone. Today Mo and Tona Ottinger join us to share some wisdom they've gained and experiences they've had in their 20+ years of parenting. Please just know that this road was NOT intended to be walked alone - more details today in a brand new episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today we take an exclusive look at one of Dr. Karyn Purvis' most helpful parenting strategies with Jesse Faris and Becca McKay. In this episode, we delve into a never-before-seen clip with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, where she shares invaluable insights on how to manage anger and build trust with our kids. Join us for a deep dive conversation on the power of trust-based parenting and its potential to transform children AND adults. To watch the video before listening, check it out on our YouTube Channel! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We are so excited to share a never-before-seen clip of Dr. Karyn Purvis teaching today. Our team has been on pins and needles waiting to release several new videos of Karyn, so we wanted to hop on an episode today to take the content she shares with us in the video deeper! We've all experienced moments of over-responding as parents. How do we ensure that we aren't going to send our children further into dysregulation when conflict arises? What is the ultimate goal of parenting in moments when children are dysregulated? Dr. Karyn Purvis helps us find the answers in this clip, ETC's own Jesse Faris and Becca McKay help break down how we apply it in our daily lives in the podcast.  To watch the video before listening to the show today, check it out here! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Recurring guests Lisa Qualls and Melissa Corkum, whom you may know from their work at The Adoption Connection, are no stranger to blocked care. They joined us in episode 100 to talk Compassion Fatigue and introduce the idea of blocked care and are back today to tell us about their new book: Compassion Fatigue: Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith. Melissa and Lisa explain what blocked care is and how to reclaim compassion and hope in your parenting when it feels impossible. You can access the assessment they mention on their website here as well as checking out the adoption connection podcast and the litany of resources available there.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

As our good friend Robyn Gobbel shared with us back in episode 25, there really is no such thing as self regulation (without co regulation as a precursor)...so forgive us for the double meaning in the title, but today we talk about the role parents play in their child's self regulation learning process. Spoiler alert - it's a big role and it hinges on parents being fully present AND aware of how to self regulate on their own. Have no fear, though, Jesse Faris and Becca McKay joined us to talk all about that process, share some stories of triumph AND failure as well as leave with some practical steps that can help you in that process no matter where you are in it. If you've been having a tough time with meltdowns and "you're too old for this" kind of behaviors, this is your episode (and none of us are ever too old for big emotions, by the way)! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

What do I do when I meet resistance to this style of parenting? For many of us, when we make the change to parent in a more connected, attachment-centered way, it can be a jarring change to those around us. For many people, there is never a second thought about continuing in the parenting style and practices they were raised in. For lots of us, however, parenting in the style we were raised in presented major complications, especially when met with kiddos who have experienced early trauma, stress or adversity in life.  Becca McKay and host JD Wilson sat down to talk about how to navigate the resistance many of us face in this way of parenting. We address everything from "Isn't it permissive parenting?" to "that's not how we raise our kids" to "I'm trauma informed, I watched a slideshow on trauma the other day." If you're needing a reminder of why we do things the way we do, or you just need to know how to handle the questions that come as a result, today's your episode! Lastly - Big News! Applications to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator CLOSE ON THURSDAY, MARCH 23rd!! We are taking applications now for our May - July Facilitator training and we'd love for YOU to be a part of it. We deeply believe that this content, taught peer-to-peer, in communities, transforms those communities. Want to help nurture and build a supportive community of trauma-informed parents? Here is your chance. Head to empoweredtoconnect.org and apply NOW for our next round of Facilitator training. Training begins online in May and wraps up with 3 incredible days in Memphis, Tennessee with the ETC Team. If you, or someone you know, needs to be bringing this content to your community, apply now on our website! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

As the War in Ukraine passes the one year anniversary of its' bloody start, we sat down with 3 very special individuals who have been on the front lines of caring for the Ukrainian people. Part 3 of our series features our friend Raya Shelashska. Raya is a Ukrainian, a PhD Student at the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development (KPICD) and a mom working to begin bringing hope and healing to her country's people. She talks with us about life in Ukraine, what family and friends are facing in major cities like Kiev as well as small villages being targeted by Russian shells daily. Raya also shares her vision for helping bring therapeutic, trauma-informed care to families and individuals in post-war Ukraine and her thoughts on why Ukrainians are SO inherently resilient. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

As the War in Ukraine passes the one year anniversary of its' bloody start, we sat down with 3 very special individuals who have been on the front lines of caring for the Ukrainian people. Madison and Yuriy Perekotiy, missionaries to Ukraine, are stateside at the moment helping bring awareness to the acute needs on the ground of families and individuals in crisis. As a Ukrainian national, Yuriy explains the history of Ukraine and why its' people are so resilient. He and his wife, Madison, an American, share their stories of relief efforts in the war and why Ukrainian people are so resilient here in part 2. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

As the War in Ukraine passes the one year anniversary of its' bloody start, we sat down with 3 very special individuals who have been on the front lines of caring for the Ukrainian people. Madison and Yuriy Perekotiy, missionaries to Ukraine, are stateside at the moment helping bring awareness to the acute needs on the ground of families and individuals in crisis. As a Ukrainian national, Yuriy explains the history of Ukraine and why its' people are so resilient. He and his wife, Madison, an American, share their story of foster care, mission work and war relief efforts in part 1 of our series here. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

Today we bring on two therapists we love dearly to talk about transracial adoption. Why did we bring these two therapists to talk about this topic? Glad you asked! Anteelah and Teressa currently lead a therapeutic support group for transracial adoptive parents at the Memphis Family Connection Center. As we've caught wind of what is happening in that group, we wanted to give their work and their wisdom a broader audience.  Teressa and Anteelah talk about everything from what has been the most common themes emerging from their group, how they advocate for parents talking about race with their kids and so much more - don't miss this episode! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

Is meal time a source of constant stress in your house? Have you wondered why your kids just can't bring themselves to try a certain food or texture? This can seem small on the surface, but often we forget that eating is one of the very few activities in life that involves all five senses. Today we wanted to bring in an Occupational Therapist and Speech Pathologist to walk us through an intro into the world of feeding and food issues. Courtney Mitchell and Katherine Byrd work at the Memphis Family Connection Center and walk us through not just WHY kids sometimes struggle but also how to begin walking through this struggle with them. Also - WE HAVE SOME BIG NEWS!  As you know if you're a regular listener, we empower Facilitators to take our parenting course, Cultivate Connection to their local communities. We are so grateful and proud of the work our Facilitators are doing to provide life on life support for parents near them. Over the years, MANY of you have reached out asking for a course online, especially those of you who do not have a Facilitator near you. First, a reminder: We've currently got an opportunity to sign up to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator, so check our website for those details if YOU want to become part of our growing network! We'd love to consider your application! If you are wanting to take the class, however, and for whatever reason the opportunities available haven't worked out for you - WE ARE OFFERING CULTIVATE CONNECTION ONLINE for the first time ever!!!!!  As a special limited time offer, YOU as an ETC Podcast Listener get 20% off with the Code ETCPOD-23 . SIGN UP FOR OUR ONLINE COURSE TODAY if the dates and times line up with your schedule! This class will be LIVE not recorded, and it starts Sunday, March 12th! Again, that's ETCPOD-23 for 20% off the parenting course! We'd love to see you there! 

Do you have siblings who seem to be in conflict constantly in your home? Good, none of us do either! For the people who DO have sibling conflict happening often, this episode is for you! While we joke, the reality is, when dealing with consistent sibling fighting/conflict, it can feel like there's no end in sight. That's why we brought Dr. Matt Smith and Therapist Lauren Wantz on to discuss how to approach this type of issue.  While there's no quick fix or instant solution, the great news is that there is a lot to examine and try when it comes to addressing sibling issues. Dr. Smith and Lauren give us an inside look at what could be happening philosophically as well as some very practical tips and tools for you to have at your disposal as you address these issues going forward! Also - WE HAVE SOME BIG NEWS!  As you know if you're a regular listener, we empower Facilitators to take our parenting course, Cultivate Connection to their local communities. We are so grateful and proud of the work our Facilitators are doing to provide life on life support for parents near them. Over the years, MANY of you have reached out asking for a course online, especially those of you who do not have a Facilitator near you. First, a reminder: We've currently got an opportunity to sign up to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator, so check our website for those details if YOU want to become part of our growing network! We'd love to consider your application! If you are wanting to take the class, however, and for whatever reason the opportunities available haven't worked out for you - WE ARE OFFERING CULTIVATE CONNECTION ONLINE for the first time ever!!!!!  As a special limited time offer, YOU as an ETC Podcast Listener get 20% off with the Code ETCPOD-23 . SIGN UP FOR OUR ONLINE COURSE TODAY if the dates and times line up with your schedule! This class will be LIVE not recorded, and it starts Sunday, March 12th! Again, that's ETCPOD-23 for 20% off the parenting course! We'd love to see you there! 

It's a problem. My child is constantly using manipulation and control to get whatever they want and I don't know how to stop it. In our most watched YouTube video in our channel's HISTORY, Dr. Karyn Purvis reminds us that this narrative is WRONG. What if your child is not a 'bad kid' who is manipulative and controlling? What if your child has endured some early trauma, stress and adversity and these strategies are survival strategies, not problematic patterns? Join Tona Ottinger, Becca McKay and host JD Wilson as we take a deep dive into Dr. Purvis' framework for how to handle manipulation and control. You'll leave with some practical philosophies and practices to transform your view of your child and help them negotiate their needs in a healthy, connected way! Also - WE HAVE SOME BIG NEWS!  As you know if you're a regular listener, we empower Facilitators to take our parenting course, Cultivate Connection to their local communities. We are so grateful and proud of the work our Facilitators are doing to provide life on life support for parents near them. Over the years, MANY of you have reached out asking for a course online, especially those of you who do not have a Facilitator near you. First, a reminder: We've currently got an opportunity to sign up to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator, so check our website for those details if YOU want to become part of our growing network! We'd love to consider your application! If you are wanting to take the class, however, and for whatever reason the opportunities available haven't worked out for you - WE ARE OFFERING CULTIVATE CONNECTION ONLINE for the first time ever!!!!!  As a special limited time offer, YOU as an ETC Podcast Listener get 20% off with the Code ETCPOD-23 . SIGN UP FOR OUR ONLINE COURSE TODAY if the dates and times line up with your schedule! This class will be LIVE not recorded, and it starts Sunday, March 12th! Again, that's ETCPOD-23 for 20% off the parenting course! We'd love to see you there! 

It's time to talk about sleep issues. Admittedly, this is one of the toughest aspects of parenting to tackle. There are SO many variables and SO few universal practices, it can be hard to know where to start when you or a kiddo are struggling to sleep. We brought in speech therapist Annie Cornell and occupational therapist Luz Wolf for just that reason today! Annie is a single foster mama and Speech Therapist at the Memphis Family Connection Center and Luz Wolf is an Occupational Therapist with 20+ years of experience. They talk with us about why sleep can be so difficult to tackle and what may be happening emotionally and in the body at bedtime, preventing sleep. Tona Ottinger also joins us to talk about the complications that enter the picture when your babies have experienced trauma, adversity and early stress in life.  The CDC Sleep Stage Chart that Luz references can be found here and the American Academy of Pediatrics Resource page she listed can be found here.  Lastly - Big News! Applications to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator are open now! We are taking applications now for our May - July Facilitator training and we'd love for YOU to be a part of it. We deeply believe that this content, taught peer-to-peer, in communities, transforms those communities. Want to help nurture and build a supportive community of trauma-informed parents? Here is your chance. Head to empoweredtoconnect.org and apply NOW for our next round of Facilitator training. Training begins online in May and wraps up with 3 incredible days in Memphis, Tennessee with the ETC Team. If you, or someone you know, needs to be bringing this content to your community, apply now on our website!

Part of the late Dr. Karyn Purvis' brilliance was teaching people to see beyond what was right in front of them. What's going on behind these behaviors? Today, we take a deep dive into one of our most watched teaching clips on our YouTube Channel from Dr. Purvis. In this video, she asks 'How Do I Handle Lying?' and with the help of ETC Co-Founder Michael Monroe, helps us to understand the issue while giving some practical supports as we address lying in our homes. Tona Ottinger and Becca McKay join us to do some group therapy and go beyond the video to unpack the strategies and supports given by Dr. Purvis and Michael. Want more on the topic? Check out our episode with Robyn Gobbel on lying here: https://youtu.be/5Mx2Ye7J508 Lastly - Big News! Applications to become a Cultivate Connection Facilitator are open now! We are taking applications now for our May - July Facilitator training and we'd love for YOU to be a part of it. We deeply believe that this content, taught peer-to-peer, in communities, transforms those communities. Want to help nurture and build a supportive community of trauma-informed parents? Here is your chance. Head to empoweredtoconnect.org and apply NOW for our next round of Facilitator training. Training begins online in May and wraps up with 3 incredible days in Memphis, Tennessee with the ETC Team. If you, or someone you know, needs to be bringing this content to your community, apply now on our website!

Anxiety is a hot button issue these days - but what is it, really? Glad you asked - we brought two amazing therapists, Jill Stockburger and Teressa Davis, to dive into all things anxiety and share how you can support your kids, your peers and yourself when you feel anxiety creeping in. We talk about when to think about professional help, practical tools for battling anxiety and so much more in today's episode! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

ADHD has been a hot button topic in the parenting world for years - what is it? How do we support our kids living with ADHD and how do I know if we should use medication? Are there ways I can support my kids with ADHD outside of medication? All of these questions are hard to navigate as parents. That's why we decided to bring in Dr. Matt Smith, Clinical Director of Counseling at Memphis Family Connection Center to help us walk through all of these questions.  Check out one of the resources Matt mentioned here: https://www.additudemag.com/ To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

Occupational Therapist Marti Smith didn't set out to be what she is today. In fact, all she was trying to do was help kids - but mentors Bruce Perry and Karyn Purvis had other plans! In today's episode hear how Marti's professional work and personal passions collided and formed an opportunity she wouldn't have dreamed of. Marti is an occupational therapist, author, speaker and so much more! She joins us to tell the story of first getting connected to Bruce Perry and Karyn Purvis, how her work with the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development has transformed her private practice and what she's working on now to help therapists everywhere collaborate in trauma informed work. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

In case you didn't know, for nearly all of us reading this, the holiday season is in full swing. For those of you who feel the fearful holiday twitch coming on, don't worry - we're here to help you out! Mo and Tona Ottinger join us today to talk about the imporance of making memories and the role the brain and our sensory systems have to play in that process. It is a fascinating conversation and one that is a necessity for all parents! To read the article that Mo referenced in the podcast, click here! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

Well it's THAT time of year again - traveling, decorating, celebrating and freaking out because you're not sure how Aunt so and so will do when one of your kids needs a minute to calm down. Fear not! We've talked about this before and are replaying one of our most helpful holiday episodes to help you navigate this season! Today we joined forces with ETC Parent Trainer Jesse Faris and Tona Ottinger to talk about how to prepare for the holidays before, during and after your interactions with family. Have no idea how to prep for meltdowns? Wondering how your kids are processing their time together? We've got you covered. We've also linked a blog here below that was written a few years ago (pre-Covid) that could be some help as well - check it out!  https://empoweredtoconnect.org/tis-the-season/ To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

We have a special gift for you today as we head into December - our first ever ETC Podcast Mini-Series! A surprising connection to ETC's own Tona Ottinger led us to booking Brad Ewell as a podcast guest. When we sat down to talk, his story was so unbelievable, we decided the only way to capture it all was in the form of a five-part series. A Texas Police Officer minding his own business, Brad got a Facebook message at age 48 that completely changed his life. As he pulled the threads of his own life story, even he couldn't have predicted the twists and turns that emerged. This Episode is the finale, Part 5: Life Without Parole? Wanna talk more about this series and all things parenting? Want to find a community of likeminded peers with no judgment or shame? Join our new, free online ETC Podcast Community here! #family #familysecrets #adoption #podcast #empoweredtoconnect #latediscoveryadoptee #nonpaternityevent #mpe #npe #ancestrydna #domesticadoption #adoptionjourney

We have a special gift for you today as we head into December - our first ever ETC Podcast Mini-Series! A surprising connection to ETC's own Tona Ottinger led us to booking Brad Ewell as a podcast guest. When we sat down to talk, his story was so unbelievable, we decided the only way to capture it all was in the form of a five-part series. A Texas Police Officer minding his own business, Brad got a Facebook message at age 48 that completely changed his life. As he pulled the threads of his own life story, even he couldn't have predicted the twists and turns that emerged. This Episode is Part 4: Pop Wanna talk more about this series and all things parenting? Want to find a community of likeminded peers with no judgment or shame? Join our new, free online ETC Podcast Community here! #family #familysecrets #adoption #podcast #empoweredtoconnect #latediscoveryadoptee #nonpaternityevent #mpe #npe #ancestrydna #domesticadoption #adoptionjourney

We have a special gift for you today as we head into December - our first ever ETC Podcast Mini-Series! A surprising connection to ETC's own Tona Ottinger led us to booking Brad Ewell as a podcast guest. When we sat down to talk, his story was so unbelievable, we decided the only way to capture it all was in the form of a five-part series. A Texas Police Officer minding his own business, Brad got a Facebook message at age 48 that completely changed his life. As he pulled the threads of his own life story, even he couldn't have predicted the twists and turns that emerged. This Episode is Part 3: Family Ties Wanna talk more about this series and all things parenting? Want to find a community of likeminded peers with no judgment or shame? Join our new, free online ETC Podcast Community here! #family #familysecrets #adoption #podcast #empoweredtoconnect #latediscoveryadoptee #nonpaternityevent #mpe #npe #ancestrydna #domesticadoption #adoptionjourney

We have a special gift for you today as we head into December - our first ever ETC Podcast Mini-Series! A surprising connection to ETC's own Tona Ottinger led us to booking Brad Ewell as a podcast guest. When we sat down to talk, his story was so unbelievable, we decided the only way to capture it all was in the form of a five-part series. A Texas Police Officer minding his own business, Brad got a Facebook message at age 48 that completely changed his life. As he pulled the threads of his own life story, even he couldn't have predicted the twists and turns that emerged. This Episode is Part 2: Family Lies Wanna talk more about this series and all things parenting? Want to find a community of likeminded peers with no judgment or shame? Join our new, free online ETC Podcast Community here! #family #familysecrets #adoption #podcast #empoweredtoconnect #latediscoveryadoptee #nonpaternityevent #mpe #npe #ancestrydna #domesticadoption #adoptionjourney

We have a special gift for you today as we head into December - our first ever ETC Podcast Mini-Series! A surprising connection to ETC's own Tona Ottinger led us to booking Brad Ewell as a podcast guest. When we sat down to talk, his story was so unbelievable, we decided the only way to capture it all was in the form of a five-part series. A Texas Police Officer minding his own business, Brad got a Facebook message at age 48 that completely changed his life. As he pulled the threads of his own life story, even he couldn't have predicted the twists and turns that emerged. This Episode is Part 1: Ancestry.com Wanna talk more about this series and all things parenting? Want to find a community of likeminded peers with no judgment or shame? Join our new, free online ETC Podcast Community here! #family #familysecrets #adoption #podcast #empoweredtoconnect #latediscoveryadoptee #nonpaternityevent #mpe #npe #ancestrydna #domesticadoption #adoptionjourney

Natalie Bergstrasser is a Cultivate Connection Facilitator, Social Worker, Mom and more. She experienced the foster care system from the inside as a biological child in a foster family and then later as a child in the foster care system. She now is working from multiple angles to affect change in the system and make sure that children and families have what they need to thrive and you're going to love hearing from her! Natalie is brilliant, thoughtful and the kind of person everybody wants on their team - tune in to hear why! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

We're joined today by one of our favorite guests of all time - Carissa Woodwyk is a licensed professional therapist, mom, adoptee advocate and adult adoptee herself (among lots of other things). 10 years ago Carissa took the stage at the Created for Care Conference and sparked a complex conversation about the many nuanced sides of the adoption conversation. Carissa speaks often of the "both and" within adoption and unpacks that thought and so many more with us today.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

We are throwing it back to one of our most impactful episodes of the year for this moment. It's National Adoption Awareness Month and the perfect time to revisit this conversation between a Birth Mother (Ashley Mitchell), Adoptee (Carissa Woodwyk) and Adoptive Mother (Tona Ottinger).  What if instead of being separated into our corners of the triad focusing on what makes us different we found ourselves drawn together through our similarities? Join us on this episode where Tona is joined by her dear friends Carissa Woodwyk and Ashley Mitchell. Together they represent the three parts of the adoption triad in all of its brokenness, beauty, pain and possibility. This conversation is courageous, bold, heartfelt, and raw as it invites us to reimagine moving TOGETHER towards connection, hope, healing and wholeness.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, visit us on our website, find us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram or check out all of our podcast episodes and video resources on YouTube!

Remember that social media post you made years ago? The one that just popped up in your timehop or Facebook memories and reminded you of just how ignorant you USED TO be? We all have those posts and today on the show we have a brilliant guest to remind us that we can celebrate the gift of growing, learning and changing perspectives. Ashley Mitchell, or @bigtoughgirl as she's known on Instagram, is a leader in the adoption advocacy space and a fierce defender of birth mothers in the adoption constellation (or 'triad' - more on that in today's episode), of which she is one herself. Today, Ashley joins us to share about the incredible work being done in a variety of sectors in the adoption world, how she's working to bring an end to human trafficking of adoptees and so, so much more.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Ok we admit - the title is a little 'click-baity', but don't we all want the secrets to caring for our tweens and teens without losing our minds!? We brought Scott Watters from Arms of Hope in today to tell us how we can do that and let me tell you - he did not disappoint! Over the years Scott has worked with Arms of Hope but also with our great friends at the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development as a TBRI mentor and he brings a refreshing, thoughtful and experienced voice to the show to help us all have hope that we can parent through these teen years while still building connection with our kids. To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Sheila Wise Rowe is a brilliant author, speaker, thinker and guest on today's episode! She is the author of two incredible books: Healing Racial Trauma: The Road to Resilience and Young, Gifted and Black, a Journey of Lament and Celebration (both incredible books that you should add to your library right now). Sheila joins us to define racial trauma and speaks to how we need to understand racial trauma in our own history as parents before we can lead our children to healing.  We cover a LOT in this episode and whether it's talking about her own experience being part of bussing integration efforts in Boston or giving advice to transracial adoptive families, you won't want to miss what Sheila brings to the episode today! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We hear people talk about doing 'the work' all the time. In different contexts, it holds different meanings, but generally, this phrase refers to the work needed that cannot be substituted. Today, we add to our conversation about attachment from a parenting standpoint to discuss what it means and how to begin doing 'the work' as parents. To hear our episode on Attachment with Dr. Jamie DeLuna, listen here, To hear our episode on Attachment and Attachment Styles with Dr. Casey Call, listen here and as always, to check us out on YouTube, head to our channel!

Our latest animated video helping explain attachment cycles is live on YouTube and it got us thinking about something. For all of us here at ETC, learning about attachment theory and the attachment styles was a game changer. We all know that when it comes to parenting, there's no miracle button that makes everything easy - there are, however, pieces of information that make a radical difference in how we parent. This is one of those topics. Becca McKay, Tona Ottinger and JD Wilson discuss the personal and parenting implications for their own lives once they began learning about the attachment cycle and attachment styles. To hear our episode on Attachment with Dr. Jamie DeLuna, listen here, To hear our episode on Attachment and Attachment Styles with Dr. Casey Call, listen here and as always, to check us out on YouTube, head to our channel!

Today we hear from one of our favorite people and recurring guests, Jocelyn Lee. Jocelyn is a Licensed School Social Worker and joins us today to elaborate on a statement she made at an ETC event years ago. We'd invited Jocelyn to give her perspective as part of a panel discussion on Transracial Adoption and she shared this thought: Don't make your child's race a field trip. Hear the reason Jocelyn said this, ways she suggests transracial adoptive parents take steps toward embracing their child's culture and so, so much more in today's episode! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today we welcome on Angie Grant and Jess Aaron, two of our newest ETC Cultivate Connection Facilitators! Angie and Jess join us to talk about the absolute non-negotiable importance of finding people to have community with as parents. They share personal stories of the moment they knew they needed help, how they began finding people to walk with and even the importance of seeking out therapeutic/professional help as you navigate parenting challenges. Necessary listening - we hope you enjoy it! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Dr. Karyn Purvis had a goal. A big, audacious goal. A goal so big, the staff at TCU repeatedly attempted to convince her to pare it down - and we've all benefited because she didn't. Daren Jones, the Associate Director of Training and Consultations at the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development joins us to talk about WHAT that big audacious goal was and why we should all care about it.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We all hear stories growing up of who we're like: 'oh, you've got your grandfather's charm', 'you're tall just like your mom', etc. We tend to understand those sorts of generational traits being passed down, but for some reason, the idea of generational trauma has escaped the public consciousness until recently. We wanted to know more about generational trauma and how to mindfully begin to break those cycles, so we brought friend of the program Ms. Jacque Rowe Fields back in! Jacque talks with JD and Becca about what generational trauma is, how to understand it and how to begin healing from it on today's episode of the ETC Podcast! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Our guest today may be one of the kindest humans on the face of the planet. It seemed fitting, of course, that we would have her on to talk about being kind to ourselves. Christy Edwards has spent the vast majority of her professional life as a Counselor. She joins us today to discuss the reasons it is so vitally important to our wellbeing (and to those we're in relationship with) to learn how to show ourselves kindness. This conversation spans a wide array of situations and perspectives, so grab a notebook and join us for a powerful conversation with our good friend Christy Edwards! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Our guests today have been caring for parents for years through their organization called "The Adoption Connection". Lisa Qualls and Melissa Corkum together represent all sides of the adoption triad and join us today to talk about what happens when our compassion runs low. Lisa, Melissa, Tona and JD talk about compassion fatigue, blocked care and share their own experiences in both.  Lisa and Melissa have a ton of amazing resources on their website that you should check out here. You can also follow them on social media @onethankfulmom and @melissacorkum_ and you can follow the adoption connection @postadoptionresources. Listen to their podcast, The Adoption Connection, here.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We talk about the effects of trauma a lot on the ETC Podcast - in fact - it's woven into almost everything we talk about at Empowered to Connect. One question, though: what IS trauma? How and why does it infiltrate humanity the way it does? We brought Becca McKay and Tona Ottinger on the show today to discuss that very thing and you're going to love this episode. An introduction to trauma and all that goes with it, today on the ETC Podcast. We also recently launched our monthly donor program at Empowered to Connect - listen to the intro to the show to hear all about it and head over to our donate page to become a monthly donor and score our super soft new ETC Tee for your monthly gift of $20 or more!   To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Our guest today has lived a life that is nothing short of miraculous.Tori Hope Petersen grew up in the foster care system, a bi-racial child in a confusing and volatile world. Growing up with a mentally ill mother and living in twelve different foster homes, nothing was in her favor. And yet, even with a minuscule chance of graduating college and a great risk of being homeless, jobless, and on drugs, Tori overcame every negative stereotype and assumption that attacked her identity.  Tori joins us today to talk about everything from her story, how she learned to navigate the foster care system and how now, as an adult, she's trying to open all the doors she can that were closed to her as she grew up. Her new book, 'Fostered: One Woman's Powerful Story of Finding Faith and Family Through Foster Care' releases August 30th and we could not be more excited to read it. Listen to the end of the episode to hear how you can win a pre-order of Tori's book and be sure you're following her and her initiatives on social media:  - @torihopepetersen on Instagram - @fthefile on Instagram - @belovedinitiative on Instagram - Pre-Order her book here - Learn more about Tori and book her to speak at your next event here  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today two of our favorite people on earth join us - ETC parent trainers Tom and Dawn Jordi from Johannesburg, South Africa! They join us to talk about Tom's work in schools as a trauma informed school counselor and Dawn's homeschooling of their 4 kiddos during Covid, their journey into connected parenting and how the strategies and tools they learned in ETC classes and TBRI training over the years have helped them to build up and support the adoptive community in Johannesburg. They also tell us about unique opportunities that  emerged during the pandemic as their ETC Parent Classes began expanding not just throughout South Africa, but throughout Africa and as far out as Hawaii and the Philippines! They're two of the most enjoyable people you'll ever talk to, follow their podcast here, Tom's work as a Trauma Practitioner here and their community work in adoption here ! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

When it comes to parenting (and being in any kind of human relationship) - one of the most insanely humbling and difficult practices is repairing a rupture in the relationship. Maybe you've wronged the other person - maybe you were the one wronged - either way, the process of repairing often requires more than an 'I'm sorry'. Compound this difficulty with previous experiences with trauma, adversity and stress and you've got yourself a recipe for...well...being a human in this world. It's difficult. It's complicated. It's absolutely essential if you want to build or maintain a trusting, real relationship in this world.  That's why we brought ETC training specialist Jesse Faris and co-writer of Cultivate Connection Becca McKay in to talk about how we repair relational ruptures with our kids and each other. There are some invaluable practical stories of how this plays out as well as a road map for a process to begin those repairs.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today we talk about the importance of giving our kids voice. For all humans, knowing how to negotiate to get needs met, to express to others what we need and when is a VITAL skill for survival as a human being. That is a learned skill - one that takes time, nurture and lots of practice with a trusted adult. For those of us and those of our kids who have experienced trauma, adversity and toxic stress at a young age, it can be insanely challenging and today Stela Sinanaj and Tona Ottinger join us to explain why that is and walk through exactly how to do this with our kids. To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today's connecting practice will make you think - or at least that's our goal. So often we respond or react to situations in our home without filtering the situation to figure out what's REALLY going on. Dr. Rachel Peterman, Clinical Therapist and Program Manager of Safe and Secure Tennessee, joins Becca McKay and JD to discuss the importance of slowing down and thoughtfully responding to situations and the massive positive implications of doing so! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

'Being there' matters as a parent. It's a principle that transcends parenting styles and advice - 'showing up for your kids' is on everybody's list of important things to do as a parent. What if just 'showing up' isn't enough, though? What we know as humans is that it is possible to be physically with someone without feeling like they're emotionally present. THIS is what we're talking about today when we talk about 'being present'. We brought ETC's own Anteelah Love and Becca McKay in to talk about being physically present, emotionally present and what it means to be 'attuned' to your child. This episode will give you life! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We've got big news and we recorded a SPECIAL episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast to tell you all about it! Tune in to hear about our holistic integrated therapeutic clinic, our partnership as an Ambassador Organization for the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development, the NEW PARENTING CURRICULUM called 'Cultivate Connection' and how you can partner with us at Empowered to Connect to help us continue to support hope and healing for families! To learn more head to youtube.com/empoweredtoconnect !

As former doubters, we'll admit - this was a tough principle for some of us to learn. How can your kids respect you if you play too much? We're so glad you asked! This episode reveals all the things traditional parenting DIDN'T teach you about play - how it can be used as a tool to help your kids regulate, to help build connection and attachment, how play can become a tool to help de-escalate unwanted behaviors before they get to "that" point. The science backs up play as a serious parenting tool, it's time we find out why! Tune in for a SPECIAL announcement about how to apply to be a facilitator for our latest parenting curriculum called "Cultivate Connection" - head to empoweredtoconnect.org and apply today for a training coming up and learn how you can help support hope and healing for families in YOUR community today! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Our latest Connecting Practice is one that can be applied to a ton of different parenting scenarios. How do we help our kids grow? It's certainly not by just telling them 'they should act their age' or by shaming them in comparison to other kids who can do x, y, or z things at their age, we know that. There must be a method we can use as parents to help them (and us) grow and develop skills, right?? There is and it is the subject of today's ETC Podcast episode! You can - and should - listen to today's episode and ALL of the episodes of the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and wherever else you listen to podcasts! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Has it ever felt to you like you just couldn't figure out what your kid needs in a moment? If this is you, today is your episode. We gathered some brilliant therapeutic minds to ask them what we need to know about meeting our child's physical, emotional and sensory processing needs! Hear from Speech Pathologist Annie Cornell, Occupational Therapist Luz Wolfe and Clinical Therapist Stela Sinanaj why this is so important and how to meet these needs in our kids (and just as importantly - ourselves).  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today's episode is a foundational one. In the world of connected parenting, one of the primary ways we give our kids what they need is to balance the amount of nurture and structure given. Stereotypically, 'traditional' parenting tends to rely on an intense amount of structure, but can lack on nurture - while 'new age' parenting tends to rely on very high nurture, but lacks boundaries and structure in place to help give kids predictability. We all tend to go to one side or another naturally, so today we asked Jesse Faris and Becca McKay from the ETC Team to help us with some practical strategies and ideas for how to balance giving structure when needed and nurture when needed.  To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today we begin walking through all of the connecting practices from our new parenting curriculum called Cultivate Connection! We begin with one of the most foundational practices in this form of parenting: Being Curious. SO often we jump immediately to assigning blame or emotionally reacting to situations or behaviors we encounter as parents...when sometimes what's needed is to put on the detective hat first. What could be behind this behavior? Have we eaten enough today? Has this child been couped up all day without an outlet to move their bodies? Could this be a product of their history - or mine?? All questions that are imperative to begin asking if we are going to parent our children through the lens of connection and attachment. Dr. Rachel Peterman and Becca McKay join us to walk through just how to begin changing our courses of action in today's episode! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

If you're choosing to parent differently - you're going to hear about it. Friends and family have questions, onlookers give you free advice - it can be overwhelming to say the least. It's helpful, therefore, to pause every now and then and ask yourself: Why do I do this?  After over 3 years of research, writing and editing, the ETC Team has completed a re-write of our 9 week Parenting Course and we can't wait to tell you all about it. We thought we'd take some time, however, and re-establish the 'why' behind this way of parenting.  Tona Ottinger, Becca McKay and JD Wilson pause to talk about they 'why' in connected parenting. Join us as we examine the paths that brought us here and the connecting practices that guide us in parenting in this episode of the ETC Podcast! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Did you know that between 62%-92% of people with eating disorders have experienced trauma in their past? The research is alarming and for those of us with kids who may have experienced some kind of food insecurity or have what we might see as 'out of the ordinary' food habits, it can be paralyzing. That's why we wanted to have our friend Whitney Trotter on the show. Whitney is a registered nurse, mother and advocate and is a part of the BIPOC (Black, Indigenous and People of Color) Eating Disorders conference happening July 20-22 virtually.  You can learn more about the conference and register here Whitney teaches us about eating disorders, their origins in trauma, body image issues and what to watch for in our kids when it comes to issues of food. We talk about how marginalized people groups are at higher risk for disordered eating and how transracial adoptive parents can be better prepared and informed as their kids get older. She also gives some helpful tips and advice for helping set healthy foundations with your kids and ways to be more mindful and preventative about how we engage with them around these issues To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!  

Long time friend of the program Mona Delahooke is a Pediatric Psychologist and the author of her NEW book Brain-Body Parenting as well as the groundbreaking Beyond Behaviors and several other books. If you've ever read Beyond Behaviors, you know how brilliant she is! Mona joins us today to talk about the Brain - Body - Behavior connection and why it is absolutely essential for parents and caregivers to understand. Struggling with perplexing behavior in your home? This may be the episode you've been waiting for.  Wanna learn more from Mona? Buy her book Beyond Behaviors here, sign up for the Beyond Behaviors course Mona teaches here or head on over to her website to learn more about her there! To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

Today, we go back to an episode from Season 1 of the show that can be particularly helpful in the throes of Spring parenting. Lets face it…sometimes our kids' behavior is perplexing.  We have no idea why they are doing what they are doing. We have no idea how to make them stop and we can walk away feeling confused, defeated and even like a failure. We have behavioral expectations and if we're not careful we can allow our children's behavior to determine whether we see ourselves as a good parent or not. We can measure our success by their behavior… Why do we do that? How do we get to the root of what's ACTUALLY happening?  Glad you asked - tune in today to hear how we look to see the needs being expressed behind the behavior and meet those needs to build trust and attachment.  In this episode we reference several fantastic books (you should buy them all immediately): The Whole Brain Child, and Beyond Behaviors To learn more about ETC, follow our Youtube Channel, like us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram!

We've talked for weeks now on the show about how Trauma Informed Care and a Trauma Informed Approach is changing systems and societies across the globe. Today, we return to where it all started for us - Trauma Informed Parenting. We asked Mo and Tona Ottinger to share their story of moving from traditional parenting to a Trauma Informed Approach and what they shared will blow you away. Spoiler alert: it changed everything. To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

One of the toughest things to do in the midst of running a youth outreach program is to change course - especially when it means re-training everyone involved. Despite the intense level of difficulty, however, Philip Walkley and Ally Velderman of Service Over Self in Memphis, TN knew they needed to make a change. They weren't equipped to walk with the kids they were working with through life. Hear how they made the jump to a trauma informed approach, the transformation that happened and the changes on staff on today's episode! Also don't forget to check out our friends Ryan & Rose! The team at Ryan & Rose have been big supporters of our work at Empowered to Connect for years. They make beautiful products for everyone in the family including pacifiers, pacifier clips, bottle holders, bags, journals and so much more and they've got an exclusive discount JUST FOR LISTENERS OF THE SHOW! Use code 'ETC20' at checkout to save 20% off your entire order with Ryan & Rose and help support an amazing company making a huge difference in the world! To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

Our guest today works with an incredible organization leading the charge to end human trafficking and care for survivors of it. Coasy Hale is the Director of Survivor Services at Restore Corps - a non-profit organization in Memphis, TN doing everything from working to introduce new legislation to therapeutically receiving survivors into care to begin the road to recovery. We talked with Coasy about how Restore Corps has transformed their care for survivors as they've learned about trauma and the brain and how that knowledge has also affected how their team cares for each other. DO - NOT - MISS this episode, you're going to love hearing from Coasy! We are also THRILLED to announce our first ETC Podcast advertising partnership! The team at Ryan & Rose have been big supporters of our work at Empowered to Connect for years. They make beautiful products for everyone in the family including pacifiers, pacifier clips, bottle holders, bags, journals and so much more and they've got an exclusive discount JUST FOR LISTENERS OF THE SHOW! Use code 'ETC20' at checkout to save 20% off your entire order with Ryan & Rose and help support an amazing company making a huge difference in the world! To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

We continue our conversation about trauma informed systems today with a look at children's ministry. Mo Ottinger and Paula Powell served together on staff at a church for years and we asked them to tell the story of transforming the child care system at their church into a trauma informed environment where every child could feel safe. You won't want to miss this episode - listen for practical applications for those working in the children's ministry field and encouragement for those who may feel the challenge is too daunting to begin!   To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

How do educational systems change? How can educators, administrators and parents/caregivers partner together to help meet the unique needs of every child in school? We've asked Becca McKay, long time school social worker and Dean to come help us begin to unpack some big picture and practical ways to start the trauma informed journey in your school.   Tune in to hear some practical advice for anyone working in education and stay tuned in as we turn the conversation toward parents and caregivers to share how they can effectively advocate for their children's needs to be met in appropriate and compassionate ways   To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

We've all done it. We've lost our temper, checked out, popped off, said something we shouldn't have or didn't say something we should have in a moment of weakness. If you're like us, you've probably already had a moment (or several) moments like this today - it's ok. Take a deep breath and let Marriage and Family Therapist Carissa Woodwyk and ETC's Tona Ottinger walk you through how to repair when you've ruptured something with yourself, your partner or a kiddo. Special heads up - be sure to listen all the way to the end to hear Carissa's perspective on this as an adoptee when she shares an intimate moment of self discovery related to her own story - you don't want to miss it.  To learn more about Carissa and her work, be sure to check out her first appearance on the show here or follow her on Instagram or Facebook! To learn more about ETC, check out empoweredtoconnect.org and follow us on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube!

Mo & Tona Ottinger join JD to talk about the huge shock we all felt as new parents learning that attachment is a two way street, not a finite 'start and finish' interaction. Why do our own histories and patterns of attachment matter in parenting children? How does that affect our kids and their attachment patterns and styles and what if it's too late to form a strong attachment with my child?? (Spoiler: it's never too late) Hear Mo and Tona share powerful stories from their early parenting journey, marriage and relationships in this episode of the ETC Podcast! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

We're beginning a brand new series on building attachment and as we prepared for the series with our team we just couldn't think of a better way to lay the foundation of understanding than to throw it back to one of our favorite episodes with Dr. Jamie DeLuna from the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development (KPICD) at TCU.   In today's episode, one of the best researchers in her field, Dr. Jamie DeLuna from the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development, explains why understanding your own attachment style may be the most important thing you can do for your parenting. We talk about the neuroscience behind attachment, the different adult attachment styles, how they form and how you can 'earn' secure attachment, no matter what your childhood was like. To check out the book Jamie recommended ('How We Love') and more resources like it, you can click here.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

In case you've missed the exciting news, one of our favorite authors on planet Earth, Mona Delahooke, has a new book that comes out NEXT WEEK (March 15th, 2022)! Mona joined us to tell us all about the new book and walk us through what she calls the 'bottom-up' approach to understanding the nervous system-brain connection. We talk about behaviors as indicators of needs being expressed and how when we (along with our kids) understand these dynamics, we can help them to thrive in life.  Mona is one of the most brilliant, engaging and compassionate voices in the parenting world and you will LOVE listening to her talk about this stuff. To preorder 'Brain-Body Parenting' click here - to check out all of the other incredible work she's done, check out her website here! You can learn more about ETC by checking out empoweredtoconnect.org, following @empoweredtoconnect on Instagram or liking our page on Facebook!

We step back from our earlier series today for a conversation with a young mom we've admired from a distance for a while now! Lisa Jean-Francois, better known to 61,000+ Instagram followers as @lisaalamode joins us today to tell the story of her journey from experiencing trauma as a child to now parenting her kids based on knowledge of connection and attachment, something she often refers to as "gentle parenting" or "conscious parenting." Lisa is fascinating and has an incredible story to tell - you're going to love getting to know her! A Heads Up: Lisa's story contains some honest and real moments of abuse battling suicidal thoughts, so this is an episode to use discretion on before turning it on with kids around.  To learn more about all that Lisa's got going on check out her website - to follow her on Instagram, you can do that here! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

Let's talk about lying. It's time. Every time we mention lying there are exponentially more shares of content, comments, questions, dm's - all of it - so it's time to talk about it! And who better for us to talk about it with than our good friend Robyn Gobbel??   Robyn joins us to talk about ALL OF IT - why do our kids (and you and I, let's be honest) lie, how do we deal with it, what are we missing here and how can we restore connection after a break in trust due to lying? We cover all of it and more in this week's episode of the Empowered to Connect Podcast!   To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

The Fawn Response! The least known of all the stress responses! We relied on the work of Pete Walker from his incredible book: PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving as we crafted this episode. Stela Sinanaj, Clinical Therapist from the Memphis Family Connection Center and Becca McKay, Program Director of the ETC Institute join us to explain the ins and outs of the fawn response as well as how to better support the loved ones in your life who identify with this stress response! To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

I'm OUT and you can't thaw me - the Freeze Response is one of the toughest to handle as a parent, friend or caregiver. It can disguise itself in lots of ways, but don't worry, we're here to help! Expressive Arts Therapist Jill Stockberger and ETC Staffer Becca McKay join us to discuss how we can support ourselves and those we love when they freeze

The Stress Responses - you know - Fight, Flight and Freeze...well, you may be surprised to learn that there are actually 4 stress responses ("Fawn" is the fourth - don't worry, we'll cover it in great detail in a few weeks). We'll look at how you can support both yourself and those you love IN those responses! Today, we dive into the "Flight" Response. Those who experience a flight stress response have learned to avoid conflict to protect themselves. They may physically run away, attempt to change the subject, deflect with humor, or lie. The flight stress response can also be associated with over-achieving or obsessive compulsive tendencies. This instinctive reaction makes people want to flee to escape danger (real or perceived). The flight response is a helpful automatic reaction for self preservation and fleeing harm. How do we support ourselves or our people when they're in flight mode? You'll have to listen in to find out! JD, Becca and Dr. Rachel Peterman explore the ins and outs of the flight response with a unique twist that you do not wanna miss. To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!

The Stress Responses - chances are, you've heard of them - Fight, Flight and Freeze...well, you may be surprised to learn that there are actually 4 stress responses ("Fawn" is the fourth - don't worry, we'll cover it in great detail in a few weeks) and we are taking the next several weeks to do deep dives into each of them! We'll look at how you can support both yourself and those you love IN those responses! Today, we dive into the "Fight" Response. Those who identify with a fight stress response have learned to step up to the plate to protect themselves. This instinctive reaction often sends them into an aggressive, sometimes attack mode to fend off the danger they face - real or perceived. What's the best way to support someone with a fight response? You'll have to listen in to find out! JD, Becca and Tona walk through everything from what a stress response is to how to support those you love in the middle of those 'fight' responses.  To learn more about Empowered to Connect, check out our website and follow us on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!